Queen of Yesterday
by avis1765
Summary: In a world where Voldemort reigns and Hermione survives - There's only one thing she can do: Go back in time. With the help of Narcissa Malfoy and The Black Family time-turner, Hermione Granger falls through time to save the Wizarding World from the awful demise of Lord Voldemort.
1. End of All Days

_It's the moment of truth and the moment to lie. It's the moment to live and the moment to die. - Thirty Seconds to Mars._

...

 _Hogwarts 2 May 1998 –_

The wind howled slowly, creaking the limbs of old trees. The crackling of rocks hitting the dust of the ground echoed over the quiet. The smell of death, blood, and fear lingered in the air. Bodies – dismembered, bleeding, and broken - were spread across the grounds. Some people were alive but hovering on the edge of death. Others lay hidden beneath the rubble, keeping their eyes closed and steadying their breaths in hopes they'd go unnoticed by him.

The cold laughter was the only sound of life. His victory was won at the demise of the bodies at his feet. " _What a wondrous triumph we've had here today_ ," he glorified – the life of the dead seeped through his lips. " _Wouldn't you agree_?" Tremors of fear went without recognition as his followers nodded their acceptance of their Dark Lord's retribution. " _I can't hear you!_ " he raised his voice – holding a white, scaly hand to his would-be ears.

"Yes, My Lord!" the crowd gathered.

"Your victory is honourable, My Lord!" A strong voice called.

" _That's what I thought_..." he hissed, his voice like a snake, icy and eerie. His bare feet walked amongst the rubble without the stab of pointy edges impaling his skin. He stopped at a body and glared down upon it. She could feel him, smell him, and she hoped like hell he'd dismiss her. Her hopes were diminished once his cold foot pressed into her arm and pushed her over easily. The sudden movement opened her eyes and she looked into the scarlet slits staring back at her. " _Looks like we have a survivor... what to do with you?_ " his forked tongue licked over his makeshift lips; sharp teeth smiled cruelly down at her.

Bracing for the man to kill her – she was saved by a woman's voice. "We will take her, Your Grace." The girl looked over to find it belonged to Narcissa Malfoy. Her tone had confidence and restraint. Her husband looked at his wife appallingly – wondering why she would bother with the Mudblood, but he didn't dare speak of it – he knew she would have her reasons. He glanced to Draco, and saw confusion in his son's grey eyes. Lucius curved a hand over his son's shoulder and squeezed out his anger, surely leaving bruises.

Voldemort didn't think on it. He knew the Malfoys and their antics were bound to be good to his cause – " _Very well... I assume you will use her for... pleasure?_ " he laughed, forcing the crowd to join him in the mock humour.

Narcissa forcefully let out a flutter of her own laughter, "Yes, My Lord. _Pleasure_ , indeed." She bowed her head. The woman on the ground gulped when she heard this – what would the Malfoys want with her? "Draco, be a dear – bring her to us," Narcissa said.

The quiet of her surroundings was the loudest thing she had ever heard – she swore her eardrums would explode at the drop of sweat hitting her boot. Feeling Draco's hands on her own, she stood weakly and looked into his eyes. They were fearful and grotty. He didn't say anything to her, but his sorrow was clear. He weakly pushed her forward toward his family. Lucius and Narcissa held their heads high, not paying any mind to the girl being forced into their presence. The Dark Lord excused the family for their noble deed and allowed them to go home. The Malfoy family bowed in appreciation toward their leader, leaving with the girl in tow.

...

 _Malfoy Manor –_

It had only been a month ago that she was last in the place. It was still cold and dark as her memories. The remnants of the broken chandelier were no longer on the floor and as far as she knew, no prisoners were held captive, aside from her. Her amber eyes scanned over the room and landed in the spot where she was tortured by her hostess's sister, Bellatrix Lestrange – a strange echo of her screams was heard by her ears alone. Was this some sort of cruel, sick joke they were playing on her? She didn't notice Draco watching her – just as uncomfortable and wondering the same thing.

House-Elves popped into the room, greeting their Masters. One had a silver tray with a teapot and mugs, the other held a tray of small sandwiches. "You must be hungry," she heard Narcissa say. Her body was starving for food, yet she couldn't imagine eating anything in that moment – let alone with the Malfoys. She wanted to say yes – but how could she, when she didn't know the underlying reason for Narcissa's request? The woman kindly pushed her toward the table with a light tap to her back. "Sit." She swallowed hard at the gesture. Surely, they weren't going to hurt her if they were offering food from their Great Pureblood Kitchen. Though he was an insufferable prat at all times – he was still a gentleman and noble; Draco took the chair Hermione was staring at and pulled it out from beneath the table, waiting for her to sit. Hermione avoided eye contact, but gave a quick nod and sat. Her classmate moved to the chair alongside of her and poured her and himself a cup of tea.

She heard Narcissa and Lucius behind them, but didn't dare to turn around to listen even though her mind begged to. The couple was talking in hushed tones – then left the room with subtle taps of their feet across the marble floor.

" _What am I doing here, Malfoy_?" Hermione whispered sharply toward the blond.

He shrugged weakly and said just as quietly, _"I don't know, Granger. But my mum wouldn't have invited you here if she didn't have a reason._ "

She knew this much was true. The Malfoy's always had a plan – however, Narcissa wasn't just a Malfoy, she was also a Black, and that could mean anything... good or bad. She accepted the tea from Draco. "Erm, thank you."

He hissed, "It's not like I'm going to bite you, Granger. You can relax."

"I'll relax once I know why I am here." she bit back.

The pair sat quietly until Narcissa and Lucius came to the table. Hermione had managed to eat one sandwich during their absence and was about to start on a second when they sat down. She set the buttie back to the plate and was surprised when the Lady of the home told her to go on. "We're not going to hurt you, Miss Granger," she said. Her voice was quiet and kind – still confident as it was when she spoke to Voldemort, but with less enthusiasm. The war hadn't been kind to her. She had a bruised eye and the skin beneath her nose was stained red from blood. Still, the woman held herself with such nobility even a king would be impressed.

Hermione felt herself nod, "As much as I appreciate your saving me, Mrs. Malfoy, I must ask... what am I doing here, exactly?" She felt Draco perk up beside her.

He knew his father's loathing for Mudbloods... but was he really to take this woman and use her for... he gulped the thought away.

Lucius's cold eyes turned to her. "Miss Granger, we have done many things in this war that we do not feel proud of," he spoke deeply, still with the same icy expression. "I know that this must come as a shock to you, but we found our indifference to the cause much too late." The tea cup clanked against the small plate as he set it down. "We need your help in changing that."

Hermione's breath caught in her throat. Why on this earth would the Malfoys be asking for a Muggleborn's help? "I don't understand what you mean by this? What is it exactly that I am supposed to do?" The realisation hit her much harder than she intended it to. All of her friends were dead and she had no one to lean upon – no one to help her fight. Except for maybe Draco, but who's to say he was really _good_? "I can't work alone." she managed to say, fighting back the tears that were desperate to fall.

Seeming to ignore the worry, Narcissa began. "We are aware that you had used a Time-Turner back in your third year; Draco informed us when he used one for the same reasons." Hermione had known this – she, Theodore Nott, Draco, and Ernie Macmillan were the only ones with Ministry approval for the usage towards academic purposes.

"Correct..." Hermione said slowly.

"We were also aware that you had kept yours for much longer than intended to help a certain cousin of mine survive and escape a certain Kiss of death." Hermione gulped. That was supposed to be unknown to all except for her, Harry, Dumbledore and Sirius – three of whom were dead. "You see, I had suggested taking you in as a way of marking us neutral now that the war is over. The Dark Lord didn't want much with us anyway after the events at Hogwarts and Draco's failure in killing Dumbledore." Hermione looked to the man sitting beside her. His jaw was locked and his eyes stared hard at the table. It wasn't a failure in her eyes. "He said that it'd take a lot for us to be back in his good graces. You were that good grace." Narcissa steepled her fingers toward Hermione.

"Me? I'm sorry Mrs. Malfoy, I am afraid that I still do not understand where you're off to with this." Hermione felt herself tremble.

Mrs. Malfoy really had a beautiful smile, even if she was using it for evil, Hermione thought. "As you are aware, the Ministry had all of the time-turners destroyed, yes?" Narcissa asked.

"Yes."

"All except for one." Narcissa pulled a chain from the inside of her dress pockets. "An unknown one." This Time-Turner had a body of white gold. It hadn't the white sand that was the usual in the centre, but sparkling silver. "This has been passed on through many generations of my family – the _Black_ Family," she smirked at her husband's ignorance, "and it so happens to have landed in my hands many moons ago." The woman set it on the table. Everyone stared at the jewelry. Hermione was lost for words. "My sister doesn't know about it – she thinks it was lost around the time our mother passed. For many reasons I don't wish to share, she need not know of its existence."

"Mother – are you asking for Hermione to go back into time?" Draco asked suddenly. "Like more time than... natural?" Hermione wanted to berate him for even thinking time travel was natural, but she knew that this was not the time or place.

Narcissa looked to her husband, who cleared his throat and sighed. "Yes. We were going to send Cissa back to try and fix things if Voldemort won. However, we weren't sure of the repercussions due to her being present in that period. When she saw Miss Granger alive – the solution came to her. She could fix it all," he nodded his head toward Hermione – her eyes wide like a deer caught in headlights.

" _Me? Why_? How far back are you wishing me to go?" Hermione asked – her mind raced one hundred kilometers an hour.

" _1979_ – So, eighteen years." Narcissa said gently.

"Eigh-eighteen years... that can't be possible."

"Oh, the explanation of time-nonsense is too hard to even consider getting into, just now," she waved, "it is possible. This charm is much different than the one you're used to. It has been kept secret because even the Blacks know that there are terrible hands that this could fall into."

Hermione frowned."Like your sister."

Narcissa shuddered, bowing her head all the same. "Exactly like my sister."

Hermione looked down at her hands. She reckoned there wasn't much she could say to this – if she said no, Lord Voldemort would surely find out that she isn't being used as a servant or a play-thing. What was it she had to lose now? She hadn't anything left here... _No Harry, no Ron._ "How would you deal with the repercussions if your Dark Lord comes calling?"

The blonde spread her hands over the table, her nails were no longer perfectly painted red and they appeared much thinner than they should. "That is just something you needn't worry about, Miss Granger, for there is nothing you could do."

Bollocks! "How would you explain my disappearance? Wouldn't you be afraid that your leader will try to hurt you... or even worse, Draco?" Hermione looked between Draco's parents. Her concern for her classmate was odd, but she boiled it down to having nothing in the world – only one familiar thing remained, and that was him.

Narcissa stood from her chair and rounded the table to kneel beside Hermione. This woman, who once held herself at such a noble standard was now on the same level as she – a Mudblood. Dirty Blood. She wrapped the palm of her hand over the latter witch's cheek; it was cold, nimble. "Please, dear, do not fear what is unnecessary. If you don't want to do this, we won't force you. I am asking – because right now, you are our only hope in saving everything. That includes Mr. Potter, the Weasleys... Dumbledore, _Sirius_..." The way she said her cousins name was odd... and telling, but of what, Hermione couldn't decipher.

"Why would I need to go back three years before Voldemort even attacks the Potter Family?"

Narcissa shook her head, "That isn't something I feel I should disclose, because I can't tell you all of what the past holds for you. What I can say is, the past holds all of our future, Miss Granger. Are you willing to go?"

Her shoulders dropped and her head hung weakly. "I suppose I have to – if it's going to save everything." She stared at her grey boots. She didn't see the wanton smile that played over Narcissa's lips... or the satisfaction in Lucius's eyes.

Lucius cleared his throat, "We will provide you with necessary funds to get yourself appropriated as well as living expenses, as we won't be needing it."

Draco jerked his head toward his father. "What?"

Narcissa stood from her point beside Hermione and stretched her hand out to her son. "We believe as soon as Miss Granger leaves, we will be put at a stand-still. We will only just exist, perhaps into nothingness."

"You mean – we... die?" his voice faltered with fear.

Narcissa shook her head, "No. We just simply won't be, Love."

Hermione stood from her seat abruptly. To this family, it'd seem rude but she didn't care too much for manners at the moment. Taking in her surroundings she asked, "Where's your bathroom?"

Narcissa looked her over warily then nodded, "Just down the hall there and to the left."

Hermione's feet carried her quickly to her destination. As soon as she was inside, she slammed the door behind her and paced to the toilet. She cowered over it and spewed every last bit of the sandwich and tea right inside the bowl, along with bile and panic. Falling back to the heels of her boots, she let out a choked, silent sob. She closed her eyes, but still the tears fell over her lashes to her lips. Sweat dripped over her forehead and down her cheeks as she faced the facts: Her best friends had died. Voldemort won, and the good side was defeated. She replayed the moment of Ron running before a curse heading her way – striking him right in the chest. The sound of a bloodthirsty laugh rang in her ears. Shakily, she rubbed the rim of her jacket sleeve over her mouth. Leaning against the toilet, she buried her head between her knees and cried. Cried for all that was lost and for all that would be. She wanted to disappear – she wanted to die.

A faint knock reached her, pulling her from her thoughts. She wiped her cheeks, and rubbed her nose puffy. "C-come in." she said throatily. She expected Narcissa, but was surprised to find that it was... " _Draco_?"

"Granger, what are you doing on the floor?" he asked, almost sounding as if he was feeling sorry for her. Almost.

She sniffled and rolled her eyes, "What's it look like, Malfoy?"

He moved to sit beside her, pulling a knee close to his chest. "It looks like you're crying and - from the smell of it – being sick." He scrunched his nose.

She scoffed, "Well, you're right about that."

He placed a hand awkwardly on her back and patted? Rubbed? – she looked up at him with furrowed brows, "What exactly are you doing?"

He jerked his hand away and shrugged. "I'm scared too, you know? When you leave, it'll be as if I've never existed. And what's the world to be like without Draco Malfoy?" he said with all seriousness in his tone.

Hermione looked sideways at him, dumbfounded. "Is that really all you're worried about? Malfoy so many people died... your friends even... and you're worried about your own existence? God! You're such a prat."

He ran his hands over his face, leaving a dirty trail from his brows to his chin. "That was my way of... making light of the situation, Granger."

"Well, you're not very good at it, are you?" she said smartly.

He sighed, "No. I... _Sorry_." She didn't answer but nodded – if she said anything else, she'd break down all over again.

...

An hour passed, or maybe two. They sat in silence for a while until Draco finally asked if she was going to take the chance in going back. She answered with a low, "I have to, don't I?" He shrugged and said she didn't – they'd make it through Hell he supposed. She sighed and nodded, "I only wish I could know more of why I need to go back."

"Well, I know you're a know-it-all Granger, but sometimes you just can't know everything," he smirked at her grief. "I'm sure you'll do fine, either way."

"Why are you being so nice to me, Malfoy?" she finally asked.

"Because, as much as I thought I hated Potter – I have realised that I didn't and I'm not saying he and I would have gotten along because that's a very long stretch ...but if all this blood purity shit didn't go on, I could've lived a life with a lot less hate in it." He nudged her shoulder with his. "You and I might've even been friends."

Hermione snorted. "Not likely, Malfoy. As you are incorrigible. But, I'd much rather have less ill-will toward you and a likable Draco might not be so bad."

He scoffed, "Phshh. I was only saying that just to see what you'd say, Granger." He rolled his shoulders and cleared his throat, "When you go back though, make sure my parents do fall in love, will you?"

"Malfoy, I can't promise you anything, but I'll do what I can."

It was his turn to snort, "That doesn't sound very Granger-like. Usually you don't try – you just _do_."

Until that moment, she was unsure if she would be capable of smiling ever again, but one did ghost over her lips. "You're not so bad at pep talks – where were you before N.E.W.T.s? Because that's when I really needed someone to tell me I'd do well."

He snorted, "You literally, and when I say literally – I mean it – had every single professor telling you that you'd do just fine."

She smiled, "but, they are supposed to say that."

The door to the bathroom re-opened and in came the woman of the house. She was changed into clean clothes and her hair was plaited to the side. "Are you feeling all right, Miss Granger?" she asked.

Hermione nodded, "As well as I can, and please... call me Hermione."

Narcissa smiled, "Come, let's get you something clean to wear and a bath. We can go over everything in a bit." Hermione stood, turning to hold a hand out to Draco to help him from the floor. He took it – pausing to look between his and her hands; they were both covered in dirt, dried blood, and grime, and it would forever stay with him that they were one and the same.

...

 _Malfoy Manor 3 May 1998_

Hermione woke with a start, pulling her wand into a tight fist from beneath her pillow. She was ready for defense if the situation called for it. Sitting up, she realised that she wasn't in the Forest of Dean like her dreams had portrayed – she was actually in a bedroom in a comfortable daybed and dressed in pyjamas, rather than denim and t-shirts. She looked around the room. Portraits of villages were hung, tall bookshelves were lavished with reading material in every size. The room itself was painted a nice beige. A small square door in the corner of the room caught her eye as it squeaked opened and out came an elf, carrying a tray with breakfast tarts and tea. She recognized it as the one that had brought out the sandwiches the night before.

The elf hadn't noticed Hermione watching and went about its business by setting out clothes and situating the curtains for sunshine (though it couldn't have been later than four in the morning). She had half a heart to tell it not to bother with such chores, but she knew better nowadays not to fuss with the help. Just before the elf slid from the room, Hermione caught its attention. "Excuse me, could you tell me the time?"

The elf jumped half a metre in the air, "I'm so sorry, Mistress! Siggy didn't mean to disturb you!" She bowed so low that the tip of her nose touched the floor.

Hermione frowned, "No, no, you didn't. I'm so sorry for frightening you." Siggy's eyes widened at the apology. Hermione dropped her feet to the floor, "I only wanted to know the time. I assume I've got to get a move on with the day." The smell from the tray was inviting and her stomach rumbled loudly, causing Siggy to look up. Pulling a pocket-watch from inside of her dishtowel dress, the little elf clicked it open. "It's half past five, Mistress. Mistress should eat!"

Hermione managed a small smile and nodded, "Thank you, Siggy." The elf was not used to such treatment and forced her own grin with watery eyes. Bowing once more, she said, "You're welcome, Mistress. It's _always_ Siggy's honour to serve you." Hermione wasn't sure what that was about, but she excused the elf and spooned two sugars into the welcome tea. As she grabbed for a pasty, she noticed a small note card with her name elegantly scrawled upon it.

 _Hermione,_

 _Lucius and Draco are off to Gringotts at six. Would you care to join me at six-thirty in the dining hall?_

 _Narcissa_

She set the card back to the tray and reached for the decadent treat she had so keenly been sniffing. The outfit set out for her was not something she'd wear on a normal day – or, _ever_. It was unique and very... seventies. A green and black plaid skirt that would button right above her navel and a sleeveless shirt which, she was sure, she'd have to tuck inside of the waist. She really didn't want to remove her night clothes and she could already hear the teasing that would come from Draco's mouth once he saw her in such ghastly apparel. Leaving the clothes where they were for now, she turned back to her tea and looked over the array of books.

By the time she was finished with her tea and flitting through the pages of an old storybook, Hermione noticed the sun was starting to peek through the windows, casting a pretty pink hue over the walls. Setting her cup down, she sauntered back to the outfit she was so desperately despised and began to slip on the black stockings. The skirt sat three inches or so above her knees, much shorter than her school uniform; it was definitely something Pansy Parkinson would wear. A quick twirl around before the mirror, she sighed. Her waist was much smaller than it had ever been. Oh, how her mum would fuss at her weight loss. She smiled sadly and promised her mother – wherever she may be - that once she got the chance, she'd eat an Archies's burger and a strawberry milkshake. Readying herself to meet Narcissa, she opened the door and walked down the quiet halls to the dining room.

Mrs. Malfoy was already dressed and looked to have been up for hours – or perhaps not even been to sleep yet. She was busying herself with items that were spread out over the table. Hermione cleared her throat, having the woman turn to greet her. Her blue eyes were sad and tired. "Did you rest any?"

"I did... well... sort of," she stated plainly. She was well aware that sleep was for the dead.

"I know how you feel. I couldn't close my eyes for more than thirty minutes at a time. Finally at three, I got up and began my day. Lucius was just the same. He and Draco just left for the bank to get you money."

Hermione nodded and looked over the things on the table, "What's all this?" she asked.

"I've a bag of clothes for you, here, it'll get you through the first week or so; I didn't want to wear you down. This is a diagram of my family tree... that way you can familiarise yourself... in case you come across us...I am hoping it'll fall into place for you. Perhaps it'll be easy."

"How are you sure I can change the past?" Hermione asked suddenly.

"I didn't think it would work – I was under the impression that Time-Turners were just another wonder of the magickal world; for use in educational purposes... that sort of thing, but I recalled that you had saved Sirius from the Dementor's Kiss."

"Speaking of! How did you know that?" Hermione asked.

Narcissa's brows furrowed, "Know what?"

"That I helped Sirius escape..."

"Oh," she said in sudden understanding. "Kreacher. You see he was the old elf for Grimmauld Place for as long as I can remember. He told me. After Sirius's passing, Mr. Potter had told Kreacher to leave and, well, he came to the next of kin which was a Black. Bella was in Azkaban, and seeing as Andromeda has nothing to do with the family, that meant Kreacher's logic was to land with me. He told us many secrets..." Hermione could see that Narcissa felt ashamed. The war made people do horrible things. When one has the will to survive, they'll do whatever is necessary to make sure the ones around them do, no matter the cost. It's much like suffocating: the body is desperate for air, but no matter how many breaths it tries to take, the lungs just collapse-the power of pressure is stronger than it can withstand.

Hermione wanted to reach out and touch Narcissa's shoulder or show some sort of comfort, but she knew that Malfoys didn't like to be pitied. Words would have to do instead. "It'll be okay, Mrs Malfoy. I'll do whatever it takes." The woman plastered a fake smile over her lips and accepted her declaration.

The hearth of the dining room lit up an emerald green. Draco stepped through, followed by his father. They both dusted their robes of ash and soot and greeted the women in the room. "Hello, dear," Lucius said, pressing his lips against his wife's cheek. Hermione didn't dare look at Draco, knowing he had stupid smirk on his face over her outfit.

"All went well?" Narcissa asked of her husband, handing him a cup of tea.

"Oh, yes." He held out a slip to Hermione. She reluctantly took it. "This is your money. You will just give it to the bank when you go back... as you see here," he pointed on the dotted line on the corner of the sheet, "It's anonymously written, so you won't face any questions for the amount or whom it came from when you'll be depositing into your account." Hermione tried her best to not look at the amount written, but her curiosity overruled her. It had to have been close to everything the Malfoys had.

"Um... Mr Malfoy... I don't mean to be rude, because I appreciate the gesture, but you don't think this is too much?"

"Granger, that was barely a dent into our vaults." Draco said before his father could answer. Lucius nodded and bit his tongue to not gripe at his son's boasting.

Weariness crossed Hermione's face, though she nodded her appreciation. "All – all right, well, thank you. I am ever so grateful. Honestly, it'll probably last me the rest of my life." That was being modest. "Mrs Malfoy, do you happen to have a small bag? I seemed to have lost mine during everything." The fact of which really peeved her to no end. It had some of her most treasured items within it.

Narcissa nodded, "Yes. _Siggy_!" The elf from earlier that morning appeared. "Mistress called for Siggy?"

"Yes, would you bring Miss Granger a small handbag?" The elf bowed, left, and reappeared once more, all within a matter of seconds. It was a purple handbag, much like the one she'd had. She gathered her wand from her pocket and performed the Undetectable Extension Charm over it. Narcissa smiled rather knowingly at the usage and handed over the documents she had gathered for the journey. Hermione placed the bank note inside, tucking it away safely. Draco picked the bag up from the table after his classmate finished packing it and found it wasn't heavy at all. Hermione shook her head in amusement at Draco's bewilderment. "So, when do I go?" she asked.

"As soon as you're ready." Narcissa answered. "It'd be best to go soon though, as we don't know if the Dark Lord will be... making an appearance."

...

 _Diagon Alley 1998 May 3_

Diagon Alley was quiet and dark. She could only imagine what Knockturn Alley was looking like by now. There was no laughter or joy in her surroundings. It was dreary and grey, like a storm could settle at any moment. The nose from the face of Weasleys' Wizard Wheezes shop was broken, and its windows were shattered.

The Malfoys decided this was the best place for her to travel in time; to fall into place easily without anyone noticing her indifference. Hermione felt that same curdling inside her stomach from last night before she threw it all up in the toilet. She breathed in the cool air in hopes she could bury it away. "I don't know how to thank you for all of this," she said to the three blondes looking at her.

All were desperate, fearful; much different from their usual proud persona. Surely it was the end of the world to see a Malfoy in such a way. They nodded, "It is you that we should be thanking," Narcissa said.

Draco stepped forward to the girl he had known for eight years. She would be making his world a better place – and everything he knew of himself would no longer be once she left. It scared him, it made him sick, but he knew in the end it'd all be okay – and he'd still be... even if it wasn't here. He would be alive and free and hopefully without the hate that had been instilled into him since birth. "I wish you the best of luck." he said. Before she could process what was happening next, he had his arms wrapped around her, which made the whole thing even more terrifying. She reluctantly brought her own arms up and hugged him back, harder than she intended, but it felt... right.

" _I'll be seeing you, Granger._ " he whispered against her hair. The only comfort she had in the world was this and it was about to disappear right before her eyes. She didn't say anything as she stepped away from the familiar surge of tears which sat right beneath her waterline. He positioned the purple bag over her shoulder – not much caring for how his father was observing the scene before him. Hermione may be going back to save the world, but status of her blood would always be written into Lucius Malfoy's brain. Narcissa withdrew the Time-Turner and placed it over the girl's neck. Hermione gathered it in her hands and noticed the inscription on it for the first time: Toujurs Pur – I mark the hours, every one. Nor have I yet outrun the Sun. My use and value unto you are gauged by what you have to do.

" _Eighteen turns_ ," Narcissa whispered. " _I can't wait to meet you, Hermione Granger._ " She smiled sadly as a tear dripped down her cheek. She stepped back and took her son's shoulders beneath her arms. Hermione didn't take her eyes from the family. She wanted to wave, but any movement would surely make her sick. She counted with every turn, the day became night and night became day. It rained, it snowed; warmth then cold. The emotional turmoil was almost too much, she wanted to stop the spinning but her destination was in hindsight. With one final turn – it stopped. She was there – here. She stepped into the world of 1979.

...

"Mother," Draco said, as he watched Hermione fade out of existence.

"Yes, son?" Narcissa turned to him.

"Did you know Hermione once before now?"

She sighed and nodded. "I didn't know her just as Miss Granger, though. I also knew her as... Hermione Black."

Draco's face fell with wide eyes. "Are you serious?" he asked appallingly.

"As Sirius Black." Narcissa smiled, gathering her son in her arms.

"Oh, _shit_."

"Watch your tongue, Draco."

...

 **A/N:** Hey everyone!

First and foremost, I will not be posting trigger warnings before chapters. I say this because, when reading a regular book, that isn't something that will be said. So, I will tell you here: There might be unsettling things, perhaps major character death, sexual content, and other mature adult content. This is rated Mature. So, if any of the things I've listed could/would be bothersome – this story isn't for you. However, I don't even know where this is going as of right now. I have an idea, but it's not planned out. When whatever comes to me, I usually jot it down and go with it.

 **Disclaimer** : I do not own any Harry Potter Characters. However there are some story lines and/or character names that are mine – If you find that you'd like to use them in your own story, shoot me a message and we can talk!

 **Rating** : Mature – Some graphic and adult themes not suitable for children and perhaps under the age of 17.

 **Fancast** : Jared Leto/Sirius Black – Emma Watson/Hermione Granger – Aaron T. Johnson/James Potter – Grant Gustin/Remus Lupin – Evan Peters/Peter Pettigrew – Karen Gillan/Lily Evans Potter – Penelope Mitchell/ Marlene McKinnon – Richard Rankin/Frank Longbottom – Ashley Greene/Alice Longbottom – Lily James/ Narcissa Malfoy – Tom Felton/Draco Malfoy – Cate Blanchett/ Walburga Black – Alan Dale/Orion Black - Kit Harrington/Regulus Black

However your imagination is your best friend! This is just my guide that way if you're an imaginative reader, you can see it through my eyes if you wish.

This story is also found on wattpad under **avisblue1765** — a few minor changes here and there; nothing pertaining to the story. Will update in moderation.

Okay, I think that's about it! I hope you enjoy! Review, follow, share! Lots of love, Blue. Xo

beta'd by: **ravenclawmidwife** , thank you for all your hard work and keeping my grammar in line.


	2. Stranger to Some

**A/N** : Hi, hi! Thank you for your kind words! I totally agree with your saying people have a right to their own opinions. But there is a difference in having an opinion and being plain mean. Yes! I did change up a few things so I can make it flow better. So instead of Hermione knowing she had been in the past before, I'm letting her go back blindly instead. I know one of you asked what WL was – it's actually a facebook group that I admin called Wandlore of Harry Potter. I was stating that I will be updating links through the page. You'll still get it all through here! I haven't figured out Ao3 yet, but maybe I'll start posting through there as well! Thank you again for being caring! I hope this next chapter brings you something good! Xo Blue.

Beta'd by: **Ravenclawmidwife**! Thanks for all your hard work a always, ((hugs))

...

 _Still falling, breathless and on again. Inside today. Beside me, today. Around broken in two; til your eyes shed into dust. – Mazzy Star_

Diagon Alley/The Leaky Cauldron 4 May 1979

The war still went strong in this time. Voldemort was on the rise-people, their homes, and establishments were attacked everyday. To some, it would come as no surprise; others just couldn't fathom the fact that the acts of violence had happened to them. Still, things seemed happier here than in 1998.

Hermione listened to her surroundings; the sound of a record player in the distance played a hit song of the time. Laughter came from small children bustling at their mother's hips. Most shops were the same, others were closed. Shop owners fiddled with their keys, opening up for the day's business. Hermione knew of one place she could settle until she was ready to start her journey. The Leaky Cauldron. Still feeling a bit put-out from the time-ejection, she managed a small breath as her weak legs began to carry her down the walk. She opened the door to the inn. It was smoky, cool, and smelled of breakfast and alcohol. Much different from his appearance in 1998, Tom the barman popped up from behind the counter, a hand towel thrown over his shoulder and a head full of hair. "Welcome to the Leaky!" he called, with a mouth full of teeth as well.

Hermione forced a smile and walked forward to where he stood. "Hello, I'd like to rent a room, please," she said.

"Good, good. Any idea 'ow long yoo are stayin' then?" he asked, pulling a pad from his apron.

She furrowed her brows, confused, "Er, my apologies. I've been traveling for some time. What day is it?"

He didn't seem to take any notice to her worries; he dealt with drunks everyday, for Merlin's sake. "It's Friday, m'dear."

"Let's say through the weekend. I'll let you know if anything changes."

Tom nodded, "Right then. 'Eres a key – take it on up to 'oom eight. Yer payment is due on the last day of yer stay. Breakfast is at seven and yoo can 'spect to have supper at six-thirty. All included in yer bill." He handed the key over to her. She paused before taking it. She really was having to do this. Before the man could give her peculiar eyes, she took the skeletal object and went up to her room.

The door's hinges creaked as she opened it. The room was nice enough. A small bed was set up in the corner next to a tiny window – a kitchenette and bathroom were just off the main space. It wasn't as dusty as she remembered her room being back in the summer before her third year. She took her bag and set it on the counter and locked the door. With the quiet, the reality of the situation hit her like a punch to the stomach. She nearly collapsed to the floor with the sensation of nausea and stress rising like lava. Luckily she was able to make it to the bathroom and threw herself over the toilet. She hadn't much to give away, but she managed bile and phlegm. She fell back to her bum and into the wall behind her. She wiped the drool from her mouth with her wrist and dug the palms of her hands into her eye-sockets. A shudder vibrated over her chest and through her bones. Tears spilled into her hands.

Loss – everything in her life was lost. She was lost in and to time. She had lost her best friends, her family, and the war. She had barely the time to mourn when she was thrown back, but she knew if she was to stay there, she would have more than likely lost her life. Voldemort wouldn't have let her live, once he found that the Malfoys were betraying him. She hoped that Voldemort hadn't dropped in on them.

Guilt. How was it she had survived? She hadn't even the chance to see if anyone else was alive. She pushed back the dead green eyes staring back at her. She barely even got the chance to look around her before she was carried off to the Manor. Her hands shook as she brought them away from her face. They were covered in scrapes and bruises; her nails were broken and dirty. Hermione Granger was never one to care about how her nails looked or about her appearance in general, but that was Before – a time when she took everything for granted. Reaching behind the curtain of the shower, she turned on the faucet and steam rolled out fogging up the room. Happy to get out of the god-awful clothes, she stepped inside and slid down the cold wall. The water flowed over her achy body, massaging her bones and the mass of contusions. She wanted to wash away all the pain; she begged the drain to carry all of it to the ocean and let it drown into the deepest depths. She tried to scrub away her sadness, but when her eyes landed over her forearm, she felt stupid to think she could. Mudblood. She bit her bottom lip just enough to draw blood, to focus her pain else where. Touching her lips, she covered her fingertips with the crimson colour and watched it swirl away with the mix of water. She smacked her head with her hands to try and knock away the intrusive thoughts taking over her mind, only to be left with a headache and bleary eyes.

She could have sat inside that tub for hours – and the thought crossed her mind, but the skin on her fingers and toes began to prune told her it had been long enough. The towel hanging behind the toilet was small. It barely covered her breasts when she wrapped it around her frail body.

Narcissa had packed night clothes for her – she was so grateful to find these. She was also happy to find that there was a package of fresh underwear and a bralette. "Thank you, Narcissa..." Hermione whispered. She looked at the clock; it was only just past noon. She wasn't in the mood to do her research. All she wanted was sleep. Padding to the small bed, she pulled the blankets back and crawled in. Her head was pounding and her eyes were drooping heavily. With wand in hand, she cast toward the window and drew the curtains. Darkness surrounded her and before she even realised she was asleep, her mind faded into nightmares.

 _The steam engine rolled over the tracks, taking us students to the one and only Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. I walked through the compartments, helping Neville Longbottom to find his toad when i came to a stop, seeing a boy about to do a bout of magic on his familiar._

 _"Are you about to do magic? Let's see then!" After the failed attempt to turn the rat yellow, I turned to chastise the boy – asking if the spell was even a real one. "I'm Hermione Granger, and you are?" I looked to the small red-head boy. His cheeks were now stuffed with treats._

 _"Erm," he swallowed half the food in his mouth. "Ron Weasley."_

 _I felt my brows furrow, "Pleasure." I looked over to the messy haired boy with glasses, only briefly noticing the scar upon his forehead. "Holy cricket! You're Harry Potter!"_

 _You're Harry Potter…._

 _…."Harry!"_

 _"Harry, behind you!" I screeched._

 _"Hermione, run!" he bellowed back. I turned to see a woman in black throwing curses to-and-fro coming towards me. Her hidden eyes were only for me. I gathered my strength to throw a counter-jinx toward the woman's purple spells. One backfired, knocking mya Elf to the ground._

 _"Well, well, well... what do we have here?" the woman said. She smiled cruelly. "Hermi...o...ne."_

 _My nostrils flared angrily at the woman. "What do you want?"_

 _"You. Dead. I remember the first time I met you, nasty Mudblood."_

...

She woke to a knocking, hoping that it was all a dream. Tears were streaming down her cheeks freely and once her eyes were clear, she saw that it definitely wasn't. Keeping her wand close, she went to answer, finding Tom on the other side. "Thought yoo might like somethin' to eat? Not seen yoo all day, m'dear." Hermione took kindly to the man. "Thank you, sir. I will come down and eat soon."

She dressed in a dusty-pink smock dress, with sleeves that ruffled around her wrists. "Ugh," she said, looking into the mirror. She would need to go shopping soon. All the things that Narcissa packed were obviously something from her past and they just wouldn't do. She wanted jeans. She pressed her hands over the waist to push it down when she found it had pockets. "Oh!" she smiled – that wasn't so bad then, she supposed. Sliding on her shoes, she descended the stairs and went to the bar. Tom was cleaning a mug when he noticed her presence. "Well, nice to see yoo," he smiled.

She nodded her head in greeting. He brought forth food, asking, "What can I get yoo to drink?"

"Hm… a butterbeer will do."

He reached into a cool cabinet and set it down before her. "Enjoy, Miss…? I haven't gotten yer name. Silly me."

"Oh, Hermione, sir," she answered quietly.

"I'm Tom, Miss Hermione. I hope yoo enjoy yer stay." He turned to another customer a few stools down.

She cut into the brisket. It was the first real meal she'd had in so long. The meat melted over her tongue and the potatoes were just as good. "Mmm...," she sighed, taking another bite.

"You know, I never thought that Leaky's food was that great. You are making it look quite wonderful. Tom, I'll have what she's having!" the man Tom had tended to moments before said.

Her cheeks blushed. She set the fork down and turned to her admirer, smiling. "And, who are you?" she asked. Just as the words left her mouth, she knew. Sirius. She nearly choked. So young and handsome. His hair was pulled back – he wore a leather jacket and didn't look a day older than nineteen.

He held up his own drink toward her in cheers. "Whoever you want me to be," he said with a smirk.

She slipped from her reverie when she heard Tom address the man. Sirius continued smirking at her, staring. "What brings yoo this way, Black?"

"Only just got back from a mission, Tom. On my way to the office. But, with the load I dealt with, a drink sounded much more appealing than dealing with Mad Moody just now."

Mad Moody? Hermione's shoulders stiffened. She had buried her beloved mentor deep away in her thoughts after his death.

"Ah, that stink mess?" Tom asked with Sirius nodding his answer.

"A stink mess?" Hermione heard herself say.

He looked back to her – yes, so much younger. His grey eyes were so warm and he had such a charming smile. "Yes," was all he said. Tom set the plate of food before him. He cut into the brisket, just as the food met his tongue, he laughed. "It's much better than the usual, I must say."

Hermione smiled and took a final drink from her butterbeer. "Thank you, Tom. The food was delicious. I'll see you in the morning." she said. The barkeep strolled over and removed the plate from her and smiled. "Need a wake up, Miss Hermione?" he asked. "Sure yoo don't want to stay for dessert?"

She shook her head, "No. This meal is really all I can handle just now. Thank you. I'll be down here as soon as the sun rises, no need to worry yourself." As she went to leave the seat, Sirius stopped her.

"The morning? You're staying here?"

Hermione really wanted to hug the man – seeing him alive and with meat on his bones was so comforting. "I am. I'm afraid I will have to go apartment hunting soon, as I just moved here. Know of any good flats?"

Sirius knew of a great flat actually. He smirked again; clearly, this was his trademark, "I do. It just so happens I am in the market for a roommate."

Hermione found that really hard to believe. This was Sirius Black! The notorious womanizer! She drew in her bottom lip and actually smiled with humour. "Um… Wouldn't you like to do an interview or… possibly get to know me before you go and invite me to live with you? For all you know, I could be a cold-blooded killer."

He shrugged, turning on his bar stool. "Are you a killer?"

"No." That wasn't something to tell him. And that was because of war – in the future.

He shrugged again, "Then the room is yours."

She opened her mouth to say something, but then closed it again, lost for words. Leave it to Sirius to have that effect on her. He stood and came to her side. He smelled faintly of stink pellets. "I'll be here at seven in the morning. Show you the place." He turned to Tom, "Place her meal on my tab."

She went to say no, as her food was already covered, but instead was met with a wink and a grin. "See you tomorrow, Hermione." He left the Leaky Cauldron and Hermione returned to the barkeeper with a look of befuddlement. He shrugged humourously, "Mr. Black is a good man, but if yoo don't feel comfortable with him, let me know and I'll tell 'im not to bother yoo."

Hermione rubbed her arms and shook her head, "No. It's all right. Thank you, Tom." She wandered up the stairs and back to her room. She had some studying to do.

Sirius strolled to the Ministry of Magic and into the Aurors' office. Most of his team had gone home for the evening, save for the few that had just gotten back from missions. Moody was sitting at his desk in his office, scribbling over a case file when Sirius heard his name being called.

"Black!" his gruff voice echoed. "Everything cleared up?"

Sirius dropped into the chair before his boss, desperately wishing to throw his feet up on the desk, but knew better. The man before him would probably strike him dead. "Yep. That Phelps should've been a Marauder, I tell you."

"A what?" Moody asked – unaware of the existence of the troublemaking foursome.

"Nothing, Moody. Everything is cleared." Caractacus Phelps had exploded eight-hundred stink pellets from the roof of The Daily Prophet – stinking up most of Muggle London, forcing people to believe something nuclear was happening. Aurors were called to the scene to clear it away and to detain Caractacus.

"Good. Stupid idiot. Why he chose to do stink pellets is beyond me. Guess that's his way to get his point across though, isn't it?" he rolled his eyes.

Sirius chuckled. "The Daily Prophet is spewing lies – perhaps he just wanted to let that be known. Surely little Miss Rita will get my message."

Moody grumbled, "Whatever. Anyway, tomorrow you and Longbottom will be given a new mission. Got some intel that would be beneficial to check out."

Sirius nodded, "Got it. However, I will be late to work tomorrow."

The man before his slammed the paperwork down to his desk. "You what?" His temperament was not to be tampered with.

Sirius pointed to himself, "I. Will. Be. Late. Tomorrow. I have a new mate coming to live with me, want to show her the place and such."

"She? A woman? You're having a witch move in with ye?" he asked skeptically, knowing very well what type of man Sirius was.

"Yes… I am more than capable of having a woman live with me without it being… Moody it isn't anything. I will be late, I won't miss the day." He didn't have to explain himself to the man, but knew better than to not say anything or else his boss would poke and prod until he got his answers.

"Uh-huh. And where did you meet this… woman?" he interrogated.

Sirius laughed. "She's a known Death Eater, Moody. She's come for my hand in the cause."

Moody glared. "Get out of my face, Black. Don't be later than two hours."

...

 _5 May 1979_

Hermione dressed in the next best thing she had in that bag of hers. She'd make it a point to stop at some of the shops to buy proper robes and better clothes. She glanced at the clock to see that it was ten 'til seven and, if Sirius was a man of his word, she'd be meeting up with him. It was a bit comforting to know she'd be getting the chance to know Sirius. After all the people she lost – including him – it was good that she had this. She even thought that maybe she'd get the chance at meeting Remus and James and Lily, maybe even baby Harry when the Potters had him. That the thought hadn't occurred to her before now was frustrating. It could have saved her a bit of sorrow. Grabbing her bag, she went downstairs to her stool and awaited her escort.

Tom placed a cup of coffee on the counter before her – people began to come through, making their ways to work. The hustle and bustle was the same as in her time. The clock struck seven and no sign of…

"Good morning, Hermione," Sirius said from behind her. She stood and found the man, fresh-faced, the faint smell of stink pellets no longer lingering over him.

"You know, I haven't gotten your name," Hermione played.

"You're saying you didn't gossip about me with Tom after I left?" he winked.

She smiled, "No." She held out her own hand, "Allow me to properly introduce myself. I'm Hermione Granger."

He smirked at her hand then took it within his own. "Black. Sirius Black."

…

The pair made their way into Muggle London, into a small neighbourhood only five minutes away from The Leaky Cauldron. It wasn't familiar to Hermione. There were quaint houses and small stores. They went on up the way and came to an old-style set of apartments. A spiral wrought-iron staircase led up to each level. Without even asking, she knew that his place would be at the very top. She hadn't noticed him looking over at her to see her reaction, but he was pleased nonetheless and led her up. The staircase ended at a small patio and sliding doors. Sirius produced a key from his pocket and slid it into the lock. Then he said a silent charm and Hermione could see the magic of the wards falling away. He opened the door and the wondrous feeling of air conditioning wafted over her.

"This is the place," Sirius said. He held out his arms, "Two bedrooms – that one has a bed already." He pointed to the second room. "But if you want the master bed, you're more than welcome to it."

Hermione furrowed her brows. "Er – why would I take it? It's your home."

He shrugged – which Hermione found he was also really good at doing – "I'm hardly here. It has a bathroom and it's bigger."

"I don't want to put you out," she stated plainly. "I know you said you're hardly here, but it'd be nice to come home to your bed and the comfort of your own space."

"There is a room just there. I can get the same amount of privacy and comfort."

The flat itself was clean and carpeted. The sink wasn't full of dishes as she suspected it would be, as he was a bachelor. It didn't even smell, which was even more surprising. She supposed she was used to Ron and Harry and their bad habits. She could hardly stand walking into Ronald's room at The Burrow, as it smelled like sweat and other bodily functions. "All right, so how much do you want for rent?" she asked.

He frowned, "I hadn't thought about it. I own the place. You were looking for somewhere to stay and I have it. Better than giving your money to that hole of a place you're at now."

Hermione sighed, "Mr. Black. This just seems too easy. You don't want anything, you don't even know me and you're offering me the larger bedroom. What is the purpose of it?"

He chuckled and shrugged, "I'm a nice guy, and you said you weren't a killer."

"As far as you know!" Hermione said a little too loudly.

He knitted his brows together, "Are you wanting me to believe that you are?"

Hermione breathed out her stress and shook her head, "No. That's not it. Just… where I come from, nothing is ever free, yet here you are. You're offering me a place to live, free of charge, on a whim for thinking I'm not a killer."

"If you don't want to live here, then say so!" he said a bit harsher than he intended.

"Well, don't you want to be able to have your ladies come and go as they please without them thinking you've a wife or a girlfriend living with you?!"

His whole stance changed. He crossed his arms. "So is that what this is about? You obviously know of who I am, since you think I'm such a slag. Sure you didn't gossip with Tom about me? Read a little too much Witch Weekly, have we?"

Her eyes widened. "What? No! I didn't say such a thing! And I don't bother with that rubbish!"

"No, but you meant it."

"I did not," Hermione argued.

He moved closer to her. He stared deeply into her amber eyes – "You have nothing to worry about. If you want to live here, the room is yours." He pulled another key from his pocket and held it up between them, "If you don't, leave it on the counter. If you do, then… I'll see you when I get home. I have to go to work."

As he turned to leave, Hermione reached out for his arm stopping him. "I'm sorry. I've come from a bad place. I've been under the impression that there wasn't much good left in the world. That's" – she could see the questions rising in his stormy grey eyes – "a conversation for another time. I am most grateful for your offer. Thank you."

He smiled, "I look forward to getting to know you, Granger." She almost lost it at the familiarity of his use of her surname.

Hermione looked around the apartment. He had bookshelves covered in a plethora of reading material, along with photographs that caught her attention. She moved toward them and noticed the familiar faces of a young Remus Lupin and Sirius sitting at a table, both with an ale in their hands. They were laughing and clanking their cups together. She moved to the next one and it was of the four Marauders. James, Remus, Sirius, and Peter. She badly wanted to tear him from the picture but knew better. She would have to form a relationship with Sirius before she bothered with any of that. The happiness within those pictures hurt like hell. She covered her mouth with her hands, trying to swallow back the sobs forcing their way into her throat. It all came down to that rat – if he hadn't been made the secret-keeper, so many things would be different. So many things could be different.

Sirius stopped at The Leaky Cauldron on his way to work to talk to Tom. The man was busying himself with customers when Sirius knocked on the counter. Tom noticed and stepped over to him. "What can I do for yoo, Black?"

"Hermione. When she arrived here, was she with anyone?" he asked quietly.

Tom shook his head, "It was just her and a small purse."

"Interesting. Did she say where she was coming from or why she was moving here?"

"No, 'm sorry, Black. I just give me guests a place to stay. No questions asked," Tom shrugged.

Sirius nodded, "All right. Thanks, mate."

The Marauder rolled into the Auror's office. Kingsley Shacklebolt sat at his desk looking to fall asleep at any moment. He wasn't the only one. It was likely they had been on an overnight shift and were told to come to the office before going home. Scrimgeour filled his coffee mug, giving the sleepy Aurors a look over and rolled his eyes.

Sirius knocked on Moody's office door, and it swung open allowing him the entrance. Moody was drinking his own cup of coffee. Without looking up to his guest, he gestured for him to sit. "Longbottom will be here any minute. How'd the showing go? The girl going to move in with you?" he asked.

Sirius shook his head, "I don't know. She's not very keen on the idea of living free in my home."

Moody looked up, "How do you mean?"

"I don't know. I told her I owned the place and even offered her the master bedroom but she looked at me like I was a mad dog," he said, exasperated.

The Auror grimaced. "If I were her, I'd be a bit put-out, too. You sound creepy, Black."

"So you're saying I should charge her for rent?" he asked.

"I don't know, Black. I'm not a relationship specialist," he growled. Just as he did, there was another knock on the door, and in came Frank Longbottom.

"Longbottom!" Sirius stood and shook the man's hand. "It's been a while, mate. Heard about your engagement. Congratulations. You're a lucky bloke."

Frank smiled, "Thanks! I kent it well I wanted to marry her when she first batted those damned brown eyes at me."

"Yes, yes. All good. Sit." Moody said, causing the men to roll their eyes and turn to their leader.

"We have a rat in the Order. We don't know who, but some information about Harper and Jones' whereabouts on Monday had been found out – we suspected it was happening, so we were able to send proper backup - however, we were only just in time. Harper was severely injured and Jones has a broken leg. I need you two to go between different Order members, give faux information, that way we can narrow it down. Let's say two at a time – three times a week. Sound like a plan?"

Sirius sat uncomfortably in his chair. It was a difficult task, but he knew it was the right thing to do. He just hoped no one would feel betrayed.

"For how long?" Frank asked.

"For as long as it takes, Longbottom. Do you have a problem with it?"

"No sir."

"Good. Go," Moody ordered.

The men stood and left the small office. They were used to the way Moody talked to them – the man had seen more than enough horror during his time as an Auror. They felt bad for him, but knew he didn't like to be pitied. They sat at their desks which were faced towards one another. Sirius still had a mission of his own to figure out and he knew he had to get started on it soon. "Longbottom, you're still friends with that Private W.I. yeah?"

Frank looked up from his work. "Oh. Aye? What do ye need him for?"

"I'm wanting to look into someone."

"Really? Who?" Frank knew Sirius was a pretty laid back guy – so when he asked for favours, it must've been something quite important.

"Her name is Hermione Granger."

"Ah, a lass?" he asked with a knowing smile on his face. "Finally found one ye might want to keep?"

Sirius rolled his eyes. "What is it with everyone thinking it's such a big deal to have a woman move in with me? It's nothing like that. She moved here from… well, I don't know. I don't know anything about her."

Frank opened his mouth, closed it, then opened it once more. "I ken ye like the women well, Black, but to have one move in with ye so soon after just meeting her, ye don't think that's inviting problems?"

Sirius shook his head, "There's something about her that seems… off." What he really wanted to say was – Hermione smelled familiar, the smell of someone he knew – but mixed with her own odor that didn't quite mesh with the force of the strong scent upon her. He noticed it when he first met her, but chalked it up to thinking it was the stale air of the Leaky. But, it was almost overbearing when she was alone with him in his home today. He couldn't very well explain that, as no one aside from his best mates knew of his ability.

"So ye invite her to live with ye? Have ye lost your mind?"

Sirius chuckled, "No. She's a nice woman, well enough. Just odd, a woman no older than our age, coming to a world different than her own with nothing but a small bag and the clothes on her back." He lavished his lips with his fingers in thought. "Will you do it for me?"

Frank shrugged, "Sure. I'll go to him tomorrow."

…

Hermione placed the key in her bag and looked around the flat. She looked into the refrigerator to find that it had only a box of pizza and a carton of milk. Inside the cabinets were bags of crisps, a package of Muggle soda, and Ogden's finest. "All right then." She checked the time, the bank would be open by now. She checked her bag to make sure the bank note was still in place. She'd also need to pay Tom at the Leaky for her stay.

Her walk to Gringott's wasn't so bad. It was nice to take in her surroundings. It shouldn't be so hard to acclimate… or so she thought. Once she was finished there, she'd stop at the Leaky, then the market, she mentally noted. There was no way she'd be living with Sirius Black and not have proper food to eat.

"Hello," she greeted the goblin sitting behind a tall podium. His chair creaked as he looked over his log and down at Hermione.

"What can we do for you?" he asked. His long fingers pushed his glasses up his long nose.

"I'd like to open an account please." She reached for the note from Lucius.

"Your name?"

"Hermione Granger." She set the check down to the counter.

The goblin sneered at it – obviously full of questions as to why she was given so much money anonymously. He did a series of tests over it to make sure it wasn't fake. Once he seemed to be satisfied, he got down from his stool and disappeared behind a curtain. Hermione stood awkwardly. She was starting to worry that he knew she was from the future… that the money came from the Malfoys… and that everything was going to fail. She was almost tempted to reach out for the note and just run away. She could find a different bank, surely. Just as she was about to reach for it, the goblin came back. He slammed down a key on the counter. "Miss Granger – this vault you're coming to is from old money."

She knew it! She knew it'd fail. "It was given to me, sir." Hermione said quietly before he could ask how. "Only yesterday." This was something she should've discussed with the Malfoys. Would they be notified now that she'd be having money withdrawn from their accounts and put into her own?

"So you are indeed an heir of the late Mr. Hector Dagworth-Granger?"

All the breath left Hermione's body. How'd they manage that? "Y-yes," she lied.

"We will set you up in his vaults, and since the giver is obviously an investor, we won't ask any further questions. Mr. Granger had many accounts and investors. You will be set to his personal account as this is the number..." he pointed to the check, "for it." He then pointed at a second series of numbers, "This comes from a private investor, who does not wish for their name to be revealed. It's a private business account."

Hermione nodded, confused.

"No need to worry, Miss Granger. The bank takes care of the business. We will only reveal the account's activity to you. We will send you status reports monthly and such. This vault holds all personal and valuable possessions. I need you to fill this out," handing her a chart.

She took it from his hands, her own still shaking. _Those damned Malfoys._


	3. Crash, Crash, Burn

**A/N:** I have had a few questions about WL … WL is actually a facebook group that I admin. It's a page for Harry Potter Fanfiction! You may check it out if it is something you're interested in. We have over 800 members, so it's quite small, but we're a pretty tight knit group! beta'd: **ravenclawmidwife –** thank you for keeping me in line with my commas and repetitiveness and sexy Sirius smirks.

p.s. Small Outlander Easter Egg hidden in here!

Here's your next chapter, leave me some love!

Blue

…

Sirius was sure Hermione wasn't taking his offer. Moody was right, maybe he was creepy. Really, all he wanted was that room the be filled since his best mate Remus had moved out. Remus wanted somewhere in the woods (understandably so) and Peter… well… Peter was a walking pigsty and he really didn't want to clean up after him. And James moved in with Lily, his long-time love. He headed home after a long day full of nothing and tried to put off the thought of being alone.

When he got to his door, he sighed. He felt left out and he wasn't really sure why. He knew his friends would be happy for his company, but they all had their own lives to tend to now. He understood, but that didn't make the isolation any better.

Once inside, he found a lit candle on his coffee table, then the smell hit his nostrils. Hermione was there. "Hello?" he called.

She poked her head out the master bedroom's door, "Sirius, you're back! I wasn't sure when to expect you. Give me a second." She gathered the documents she had been reading over and stuffed them back inside her purple bag. She was changed into a nice pair of jeans and a t-shirt. "Hi. How was your day?" she asked.

He narrowed his eyes at her. "It was… _good_. You decided to stay then?" he asked, as he scratched the back of his head. The aching feeling of loneliness withered away.

"I did. I paid rent at The Leaky, set myself up at Gringotts, bought new clothes, and even managed to put some food in your cabinets."

He stared at her. "Er…"

She grinned, "I thought it was the least I could do, since you've given me a free place to stay. So I don't mind buying groceries. Just once a week, leave me a note of what you want and I'll take care of it."

He nodded slowly. "Definitely not what I was expecting to get: a housewife," he chuckled, but was quickly quieted by the look of anger, and possible hurt, in Hermione's eyes.

"I'm no housewife," she said. He held his hands up to apologise, but she beat him to the punch. "Don't expect me to clean up after you, or to even have dinner made when you get home from work. I thank you for your accommodations, I couldn't ask for better. But do not think of me as some maid that will be taking care of all your dirty work, understood?"

Wide-eyed, he nodded. "Understood…," he looked to the bedroom and continued, "so you've decided on the master after all?"

She shrugged, "I didn't _want_ to take it. But since you were so adamant about it, I supposed there was no harm in it."

He smirked. "Well, it's nice to see you took the offer. I was thinking about grabbing take-away after I took a shower. Would you care to join me?"

"In the shower?" she asked flustered.

He too was stunned by the question, "Er. Ha ha, no… I meant food," he running his hands through his hair.

Hermione's cheeks were bright red in embarrassment. How could she possibly even be thinking in such a way? "Er… Sorry.. I just… um, no. I have things I need to finish up here, thank you." She pushed her hands into her back pockets, and nibbled at her bottom lip.

"What are you working on?" he asked. "Anything I could help you with?"

 _Yes._ "No. Thank you, though." She turned on her foot and went back to her room, shutting and locking the door behind her. Sirius stared at the spot where she stood moments before, completely confused and kind of turned on.

…

Hermione listened for Sirius to leave the apartment before she opened her bag and retrieved the documents she had been previously reading. _Regulus_. Sirius's brother would be dying this year, however the exact time frame was unknown. "I could always suggest making things right with his brother," she said to herself. The Black family hadn't been made aware of Regulus's death until August… so there was still time. She knew how Sirius was in the future. He regretted the fact he hadn't made things right. He was so angry, and rightfully so, for his brother's actions. Though when he discovered that Regulus wasn't _as_ bad as he'd thought, he kept saying: " _I know. I know. I should've listened."_ Hermione hadn't been sure what it was about until now – whoever tried to make him see his brother was different, failed. It was up to her to make it right. She opened a diary, which was moreso a log. It had the names of all the Death Eaters and the dates they'd met with Voldemort. As of now, it was only the third of May and Regulus had only been on the log once – back in February.

 _Knock Knock Knock_

"Yes?" she said through the door.

"I've brought food back if you're hungry," Sirius said back. She glanced at the clock – thirty minutes had already passed.

She opened the door, scooting herself through the crack, keeping Sirius from seeing the mess of her work. "You didn't have to get me anything."

He crookedly smirked at her, trying to hide his confusion. "Yes, well. I didn't want you to go hungry. Do you like Chinese?" He held up two brown paper bags.

She managed a smile and nodded. "I love it. Let me wash up and I'll be right out." She rushed back in her room, slamming the door shut in Sirius's face. He grimaced, but set the table anyway with paper plates and plastic utensils. He placed the four fortune cookies in the middle and poured them both a glass of iced cola. Just as he was sitting, Hermione walked out of the bedroom. Sirius stood straight up and moved around the table to pull her chair. She smiled at his gesture. Though he wouldn't admit it, he still held all his Pureblood mannerisms when it came to offerings. "Thank you," she said.

He didn't say anything, but sat down across from her.

"Goodness, this smells so wonderful," she rubbed her stomach. "I've not had Chinese in a long while."

"Then have at it." Sirius pushed forward the container of noodles. "I've not mastered chopsticks, so I didn't even pick any up," he blushed. "I should've though."

Hermione chuckled, deepening the red of his cheeks. "I'm not really worried about what we eat with. I'm only excited that I have an actual meal set before me." This, of course, struck Sirius as odd. The woman clearly had money as his cupboards were now full of food. And seeing as she only had a small bag, the clothes on her back were new.

"Why is that?" he asked, as she was diving into her General Tso's.

"Mm, sorry," she said, wiping her lips. She had spent all day thinking of excuses to tell him once he asked about her background. She figured the best way she could explain herself was to go along with a story of war. "My family was killed." _True._ "So when my last living relative passed, I was sent here by his will to take over his business." _Not true. "_ Seeing as I wasn't educated in it, I am completely lost." _True._

"What was it your grandfather did?" he asked.

"He was a Potioneer. You might've heard of him… Hector Dagworth-Granger."

Sirius looked up from his rice, "Oh. Yes, I've heard of him. I'm surprised I didn't put two and two together," he said almost apologetically.

Hermione wasn't sure what his meaning was, but she didn't say anything. "I was there… when he was killed."

She nearly choked when he said this. She wasn't aware of the cause of Hector's death; she'd just assumed it was because of his old age.

"Were you informed of the details?" he asked.

Hermione shook her head. "I didn't know the man very well. I was just his last living relative… I was spared any gorish details."

Sirius nodded. "I _can_ tell you if you'd like. But if you're happier not knowing..."

"Maybe some other time. Honestly, I've enough bad news these past few weeks to last me a lifetime," she said quietly.

He watched her dubiously as she ate. He supposed it'd be harder if she was unattractive. She was slow about it – but he could see that she was doing it out of manners. He obviously didn't know what she looked like before, though he could see that perhaps the skeletal-skinny build wasn't really made for her frame. They sat quietly, the only sound was the plastic forks scraping over the paper plates and the smacking of lips when opening for another bite. He almost wondered if he should call off the P.W.I.; she seemed as a normal person just trying to find her way in a world where she was truly alone. Still, it didn't justify the scent she had rolling over her. She stunk of a Black – but how would she even begin to know one?

She was really quite pretty, and he could see a sadness in her eyes. He liked the way her hair fell over her shoulders. It flowed like water over rocks. He had never seen such a wild mane before – he thought Marlene had nice hair. _I should probably owl her…_ He must've been thinking too deeply, because he was interrupted by the sudden clearing of throat. "Do I have something on my face?" she asked.

He widened his eyes. "No. No – I was only thinking," he waved his hand.

"About?"

"Your hair actually."

She reached up embarrassingly trying to smooth it down. "I know, it's a mess."

He scrunched his face. "What? No, it's not. I really like it," he smiled.

"You're joking," she said defensively.

He shook his head, "Why would I joke about that?"

Her face fell. "Almost everyone in my life has made fun of my hair for as long as I can remember."

Sirius smirked, "They just don't have good taste."

She blushed and tried to ignore his lingering eyes.

…

Hermione laid in her bed staring at the ceiling. She wanted the company of Sirius but figured it'd be a bit too weird as they don't know each other well enough to hang out. If she were in her own time and if he was still alive, she'd have gone to him for comfort. Sirius had always been loving towards her. Probably hugged her more often than he should as he was Harry's godfather – but something always felt right about it. She supposed that the only way the would get to know each other now is if she was to buck up the courage and go talk to him. She knew she needed to focus on her research, but there was only so much she could do at one time.

The clock on her bedside table ticked annoyingly. Turning to her side, she watched as the hand moved slowly around the circumference of the clock. Frustration started to boil inside her chest and she couldn't smother the bubbles as she began to cry. She was trying so hard to stay strong for everyone who would be counting on her in the future and for herself; yet for herself, she felt the weakest – how was she to carry the world on her shoulders when she could barely pick up her feet? She curled the pillow case between her fingers and blew the tears dripping across her nose away.

…

Sirius was on the edge of sleep when he heard a knocking at his door. He jumped up, not bothering to button his trousers. He opened the blinds to find his best mate, Remus Lupin. He smiled and opened the door wide. "What brings you this way?" he asked the sandy-blond with a one-armed hug.

"I haven't heard from you in a few days. Started to get worried about you. All well?" Remus asked. He sniffed the air - "A woman?"

Sirius nodded. "Yeah. I've a new roommate. You know, since you moved out," he answered with a cheesy grin.

"Really, and how is that going for you?" he laughed. Sitting down with his friend, his face went white. "Did you hear that they think there is a rat in the Order?"

Sirius nodded. "Yes, but how did you find out about it?"

"Dumbledore was talking about it today. He stopped by the office with Kingsley. I am just surprised they think it's one of us…"

Sirius shrugged, "I don't know. But I understand in a sense. Keep your friends close, your enemies closer…."

"Yeah. Who do you think it could be?"Remus said, confused. "Everyone seems so trustworthy. Wish I could sniff that out."

"Same." Sirius stretched, lifting his feet to the coffee table. "You talk to Prongs or Lily lately?"

"I went by their place earlier, but no one was home. I thought they would be back from their visit to James's parents by now. I figured if something was up, we'd have received a Patronus though."

"Yeah, I have no worries. Just not used to not hearing from them in so long."

Remus side-eyed his friend. "Exactly how I feel. I was literally awaiting a message from Moody saying you died because you went and did something idiotic. Which it looks like you have done – the idiotic part anyway."

Sirius grimaced. "What's idiotic?"

As Remus was about to reply, his answer opened the bedroom door. She was in pyjamas now and her hair was sitting in a knot on top of her head. She stopped in her tracks at the familiarity of the company sitting on the couch. She almost said his name but bit her tongue to keep from giving herself away.

"Oh!" she said. "Hi." She walked over and held out her hand towards the man who was looking back at her eagerly. "Hermione."

He stood and took it into his own, "Hello, I'm Remus."

Sirius could see a hint of admiration from Remus toward his roommate and he wasn't sure how he felt about it. Hermione pulled her hand away and crossed her arms. "Sorry to interrupt, I was starting to… I…" Sirius could see the puffiness beneath her eyes – though it was subtle, he knew she had been crying.

"You're more than welcome to join us, Hermione," Remus said before Sirius could. The man caught the cagey look from his friend and found it quite funny.

"Are you sure?" she asked, looking between them.

Before Remus could answer, Sirius spoke up. "Yes, I was actually going to see if you wanted to hang out."

Remus chortled. "Yes, because you ask all girls to accompany you with your pants undone?"

Sirius sneered playfully, "I would've buttoned them back up but who knows, _maybe_ Hermione likes to see the hem of my underwear."

Hermione laughed and tried covering her blush.

 _Familiarity_...and it felt good.

They sat around the coffee table for some time. Sirius and Remus talked mostly of nonsense and told silly stories about one another – it was their way of seeing who sounded more appealing to her and it helped Hermione to forget everything she had been worrying about – even for an hour or two. There was no talk of war or sorrow. Everything was genuine, happy-go-lucky conversation.

Remus didn't have as many scars as she knew him to have in the future. His face was still young and kind – not as tired as she expected him to be. The friendship in front of her wasn't as rickety as she had come to know. Though they were still the best of mates in the future, war had tarnished their lives and it was rare to have an authentic, honest smile come from either one of them.

Hermione could see that Sirius was flirting with her and she appreciated his efforts. Remus messed around a bit more than she expected him too, but it was amusing to watch him rev up Sirius's gears. He must've been up to something, though whatever it was, she wasn't sure. She relished Sirius's attentions more than she wanted to admit. She enjoyed being able to flirt freely and not feeling judged for it. She wanted to not think of everything wrong in the world, even if it made her seem as if she wasn't the one-and-only Hermione Granger.

"So Hermione, what brings you here?" Remus asked conversationally.

Her smile dropped and she sighed – Remus furrowed his brows and knew he must've hit a sore spot – he glanced over at Sirius who subtly shook his head.

"Sorry mate – I didn't mean to bring up anything," he said to her. She looked up, her eyes meeting his. "It's okay. You didn't know. Maybe Sirius can fill you in some time – but today I am over talking about everything that makes me feel like crying."

He smirked crookedly at her – still apologetic. "All right – I know you don't know me, but if you'd ever like to talk to anyone other than this guy," he nodded his head over to Sirius, "I'm happy to listen."

Hermione smiled. "Thank you. I'll keep that in mind." And she would. She always went to Remus about things where she was from. He was one of the most understanding and admirable people she had known.

…

Hermione yawned, "Well, boys as much as I'd love to stay up and chat longer, I should really be getting to bed. It was such a pleasure to meet you, _M – Remus."_ She stood, "I'll see you tomorrow, Sirius."Her eyes lingered over him a little longer than she intended, and it didn't go unnoticed by any of the party. She felt her cheeks heat up and turned swiftly on her feet and walked away as fast as she could without looking abnormal.

Remus scratched his nose and eyed his friend once she was out of sight and the door was shut completely. "You smell that?" he asked quietly.

Sirius sniffed – his pupils dilated. It was smell he was very much used to when it came to women – however as many wouldn't know, he never acted upon it.

"She's into you, mate. _Very_ into you," Remus said.

Sirius shrugged. "I can't really just go in there and say hey, I smell your need for pleasure, mind if I slither into bed with you? Heh." Though he really, _really_ wanted to. He's been waiting for the right moment and the right woman… and he wasn't exactly saying Hermione _was_ the woman to do it with. She was much different from any woman he'd ever met, but something about her made his insides melt.

"You don't have to go in there and have sex with her – Merlin. _But…_ she's obviously in need of… _something."_

"Uh, Moony? Since when are you so okay with the idea of one-night stands or fucking around?" Sirius asked, bewildered.

"It's not that I am _okay_ with it – it's just maybe with everything the two of you could get your minds off things… _even if it's just a snog session._ " That last part he said quickly and quietly and sounding almost like he regretted thinking it aloud.

Sirius's mouth dropped and was on the verge of breaking down with laughter, but didn't want to knock Remus down because this was new and he was interested to see what else the man had up his sleeve. " _Moons_ … have you? Recently?" he asked curiously. Because that _had_ to be the reason behind Remus's appeal of sexual advise.

Remus's cheeks and ears reddened, "That is really none of your concern, mate!" he said, flustered. "But _if_ you must know…. I _have_ been seeing someone."

Sirius nearly jumped from his seat. His best friend – the shy, lonely wolf – who never, ever bats a lash at a woman was seeing one, and this is the first he's heard of it! "Who? Anyone I know?"

"No, and you won't know until I am ready," Remus said absolutely.

Sirius held up his hands, "Fine. Fine. But I have to ask, did you finally do it?"

Remus slapped his friend's knee. "Fucking hell, Padfoot! You're so nosy, aren't you?"

"What?" he asked, astonished. "How are you going to say something like what you just did and then expect no questions?"

"Have _you_ finally done it?" Remus chided back.

Sirius rolled his eyes. "We aren't talking about me." He pointed at himself, then at Moony. "We are talking about you."

Remus shook his head, "You're so unbelievable. You have a woman in the next room that could probably use some company and you're more interested in my sex life."

Sirius jumped up, "Ha! So you _have!"_

"Leaving, Padfoot." He moved to the door. "Safety first," he winked and left.

Sirius stood astounded and out of place. How was it he out of all the Marauders, the only one who hadn't lost his virginity. He shrugged, _sure…_ he's done things and had things done to him… but… that smell was so inviting.

He walked over to Hermione's door and felt creepy as hell when he sniffed – the smell was lingering through the crack. Had she really been giving signs that she was into him? He thought back – because if she was, surely he would've noticed? _God –_ his mouth was watering and he could feel himself tighten beneath his underwear and was quite thankful he hadn't bothered re-buttoning his trousers. He also didn't want to just _use_ her… he knew that's how it would come off… and for whatever reason, he really didn't want to do that to her. Everything about her was as confusing as that Rubik's Cube he had sitting on his chest of drawers.

He felt his hands begin to sweat as he reached up to knock. She didn't answer. _There was no way she was asleep_ … he turned the knob and was surprised to find it was unlocked. The room was dark and her bed was made. His eyes moved over to the light coming from beneath the bathroom door and he heard the shower running. He could feel a pull, deep in his groin, his body was begging to go in there. But what would she do? His hands shook as he slowly progressed over to the bathroom door.

…

Hermione wasn't sure what had come over her. She wasn't even sure if what she was seeing was really real or if it was all in her mind. But something about Sirius with his shirt off and his pants unbuttoned and his hair tied back and just being in his element was really gratifying. Everything about him was honest and genuine and perhaps it was just the familiarity of him that was making her feel some type of way, and maybe it had something to do with the mixture of loneliness and emotional turmoil and lack of self-preservation that made her hungry for the man in the room next door. She was fighting with herself – she wasn't _like_ that – hell, she hadn't even had sex before, but that man was doing something to her sexual organs that she never felt – just by the way he looked at her. _This isn't me,_ she said internally. The feeling kept warming up and it burned her insides so much that she began to pace the room. What was she to do? She hadn't ever actually touched herself, and she felt embarrassed for feeling this way. _Shower. The heat of the water could flush it all away._

As she got naked, she felt the chill of the air run tenderly over her body and the breeze touch between her legs. She was feeling almost sick to her stomach for it – and she was realising now that _this_ was her way of being aroused.

She jumped into the streaming water, her nipples erect, and she tried to think about what she needed to do to fulfill this… _this thing._ Her hands were sweaty and shaky as she cupped her breasts, rubbing her thumbs over the nubs… "Mmm…" she moaned. She pressed her buttocks against the cold wall as she hitched a leg up to the side of the tub and slowly rolled one hand down the length of her body and to the warm centre of her apex. _Just breathe. It's perfectly natural,_ she said to herself. _Release… that's all it is. Release all your bad energy; all the negative. Forget about everything…_ Her thumb pressed against her sensitive bit and her knee nearly jerked from beneath her. She stretched her fingers to her opening and was just about to slide them in when she heard Sirius's voice.

"Hermione?" he called.

She stood stock-still – her eyes wide with shock. "Y-yes?" She didn't want to move or else she felt it'd give her away.

He swallowed, his heart thumping fast against his rib-cage. "Still up for the offer of showering with me?"

Her foot slipped and hit the shampoo bottle, causing her to fall down, pulling the curtain with her.

"Oh my god!" he yelled and rushed over to her. She looked up, white-faced – the water splattered over the both of them and she began to laugh hysterically.

Once he saw she was okay, he was laughing, too, and held out a hand to help her. She was covered by the curtain and they stood awkwardly staring at one another.

"I'm sorry. I don't know what came over me… I really didn't mean to… to make you fall. I was – it was stupid." He started to turn away, but was caught by a wet hand on his shoulder.

"It wasn't stupid. You caught me off guard." He looked down at her hand as it slowly trailed over his shoulder don to his forearm. The pressure below his waist was building. Both their chests were moving at a fast pace.

"This isn't usually something I would do," Hermione spouted.

Sirius nodded. "Same." Then he grabbed the back of her head and pressed his lips to hers hungrily. The shower curtain fell away from her body and was whirled back to the rod by the flick of Sirius's free hand.

Hermione fiddled her hands over Sirius's waist and began to push his pants down; their lips never parting.

They softly laughed at the situation, but it was so wanted on both sides that they didn't even mind the awkwardness anymore. Once he was completely naked, he grabbed beneath her thighs and hoisted her up over his waist. She was flush against him and it oddly felt good, especially when her back hit the wall once more. There was something about that cold mixing in with the heat of the situation. He began to kiss down her neck and over her collarbone, leaving small love-bites along the way. Holding her with one arm, he pressed his hand to the wall and beneath her bum, the soap bar grew out for her to sit upon. She rested her head against the tiles as he manipulated her body with his lips and down, down, down. " _Sirius..."_ Hermione groaned and his erection grew even larger – so tight he thought he'd explode. "Yes?" he said against her thigh, taking a bite of her.

"I'm – I'm, oh God, don't stop," she whimpered.

He didn't want to, but he needed to know what she was about to say. He stood from his position – her skin blotchy from the water tracing over her full breasts. "You're what?"

She raised her head courageously, "I'm a virgin." _There. I said it._

He raised his brows – " _Really_?" his voice almost squeaking at the revelation.

She nodded, biting her bottom lip – "Does that mean… I get it, if you want to… stop." She went to get down but he stopped her by pressing his hands against her thighs and pushed her back.

"Why would I want to?" he whispered huskily.

"Because I am brand new to this..." she answered.

He almost laughed at her innocence. "Oh, but I am too."

She turned her head, "How?"

"I am a virgin as well," he said.

"What? No..." She was pretty sure her heart fell to the floor of that bathtub.

He nodded.

"Then why are you so… good at this?"

"I said I'm a virgin. Not a monk," he whispered with a smirk as he moved closer to her face and pressed her against him firmly. She cried out as his fingers plunged right into her.

"Tell me if I hurt you – or if you need me to stop altogether, I will," he said to her with the same husk as before.

She threw her hands around his neck, "Take me to bed, Sirius Black."

…

They fell to the bed together. He held her over his waist as she straddled him. His fingers were knotted in her curls and her fingers grasped his back. They kept kissing – their tongues raking over one another pleasurably, tasting sweet and spicy all at once. Her legs began to quiver in impatience. He reached between their bodies and positioned himself to enter her. They stared into each other's eyes and in a silent agreement, he slid inside of her. Both their breaths hitched as he entered the tightness and it spread over him. "Holy Mother of Merlin..." he said breathlessly.

Hermione felt lightheaded and didn't want it to stop. Everything she had been worrying about – all her sadness and anger faded away as he thrust slowly, back and forth… He leant up to his knee and twirled her around to the bed, laying her on her back. Though he was hungry for her, he made an effort to be careful. Taking one of her legs, he threw it over his shoulder and felt a sudden squeeze over his cock that made him thrust deeper and harder into her. Her breaths turned to mewls and mewls into screams and he knew he wouldn't be able to hold back much longer – but desperately awaited her release. Her lips were chafed and her chin was red and her eyes rolled back with one last go – and just like that she was gone. Falling with her, he pressed his body firmly atop of hers and released his own pleasure.

He laid on top of her, surely squishing her, but she didn't mind. She weakly ran her fingers through his hair. His cheek laid comfortably between her breasts and the overpowering urge of sleep pressed into his eyes. He listened to her heartbeat – it was the most calming thing he'd ever heard. " _Sirius_?" she whispered.

"Hmm?"

"Was it everything you wanted it to be? Expected, I mean?"

He raised his head to his chin and looked up at her. Their eyes met and he couldn't tell if she regretted what had happened or if she was just nervous.

"It was even better than I expected," he said. "You?"

"I didn't really know what to expect. But, um… thank you?"

He sat up completely and smiled, "You're welcome?"

She gathered her pillow and covered herself. "It's late. We should probably..."

He nodded – kind of sad for their departure but agreed. "I should be going anyway. You know... next door. Past my curfew."

She laughed. "All right – well, you don't want to get into trouble with your pillows! They might feel betrayed."

He looked at her humorously and she felt dumb for saying it. "Right – I'll see you tomorrow, Hermione." He smirked and left the room.

She fell back into her bed and covered her eyes with her forearm – feeling elated and confused and like she wanted to do it again.

Outside of her door, Sirius leaned against the wall and knew he was in trouble. But dammit, he wanted her again, every moment, on every surface, and in every position that she would let him.


	4. Stuck in a Moment of Emotion

**A/N:** Hello lovelies! Hope everyone is doing well! Sorry it takes me time to get updates posted but, I have a lot going on at the moment! So 2-3x a month is where I'm at right now, maybe less but more if we're lucky. Anyway, this chapter is a bit shorter than the last 3 and I apologize for it. It's more of a filler chapter however there are details that are important, so keep them in mind. A lot of you have been asking if Hermione had failed the time before - these questions WILL be answered in due time, I promise. I can't give it all away, else you'd know the story!

anyway, I send a lot of love to my beta, ravenclawmidwife. She is extremely talented and is so wonderful in helping me out where I do wrong! I tend to tongue-tie myself/writing a lot, so she fixes it where it needs to be! I ask for you to give her a round of applause! Hopefully she'll stick around :)

leave me love! I can't wait to see your response! Xo Blue

* * *

Hermione steadily listened for the click of Sirius's door to shut before she moved. She removed her arm from her eyes and sorely crawled to her pillows and snuggled beneath her blankets. She wouldn't deny that she felt exhilarated… but there was a thick layer of guilt-frosting on her post-coital bliss."

Pulling the duvet to her chin, she closed her eyes and squeezed out tears that were begging for an exit. She shuddered - _How_ _could_ _I_ _be_ _so_ _stupid_? Harry would be so disappointed. " _I'm_ _so_ _sorry_ …" she whispered, wiping her dripping nose. " _I'm_ _so_ _sorry_ , _Harry_." She wondered if, wherever his soul currently lay, he'd hear her, but she thought that maybe that idea was too good to be true. She also wholeheartedly hoped that if he indeed was out there in the universe looking out for her, the state of her virtue wouldn't be in his realm of consciousness.

Her pillow was drowning in puddles of snot and tears as she rocked back and forth, quietly crying out her apologies to her dead best friend. His green eyes were tattooed into her retinas - all she could see in them was lifeless sorrow.

Just as her eyes were succumbing to the sand of sleep, she heard a faint, " _Padfoot_!"

She leant up to one arm and listened - perhaps the exhaustion was getting to her - but then there it was again, " _Padfoot_?"

" _Stop_ _it_! _Maybe_ _he's_ _sleeping_ ," a woman's voice said.

Hermione reached over to the lamp on her nightstand and turned it on as she followed the voices - " _Doesn't matter - he always answers."_

" _He_ _could_ _be_ _on_ _a_ _mission_!" the woman argued. " _How_ _would_ _you_ _feel_ _if you get him found out? Hm?"_

Opening the drawer, Hermione peeked in and found a shard of broken mirror resting on a velvet cloth. On the glass, she saw the very familiar face of, " _Harry_ …" she shakily whispered, then threw the drawer shut and jumped from the bed, shivering. Her stomach was turning in knots and the shakiness wouldn't go away. Freezing, she reached for the shirt that had been discarded earlier at the end of her bed. She tossed it over her head and tried to steady herself. " _Okay_ …" she breathed. She walked back to the stand and listened again. " _Just give it a rest, call back tomorrow."_

"Wait!" Hermione called, before she knew that she said it. She opened the drawer, picked up the mirror and looked into it. Harry with blue eyes stared back at her - yet it wasn't Harry, it was James. James Potter.

…

James jerked his head back into the frame with a look of exasperation - as if he wanted to smile, or maybe laugh, but all the same be serious. "Who are you?" he asked finally.

The woman, who Hermione could see, had fiery red hair and the most magnificent pair of green, slanted cat eyes spoke up once again, "Is it not Sirius?" she asked, pulling the looking glass into her own hands. "Oh! Who are you?"

Hermione's cheeks reddened. "I'm Hermione. I'm a friend - well, not really a friend. I am actually his flat-mate… _Sirius's_ , I mean."

"His... flat-mate?" James asked skeptically. "Sirius doesn't do… especially not with… women. As all women, for Sirius, are trouble."

"That's not true. Sirius is very capable of having a woman as roommate, give him more credit, James," the woman said. "I'm Lily Evans and this is my fiancé, James Potter. We're friends of Sirius. Is he 'round? It's odd he's left the mirror sitting about. Is he 'right?"

Hermione smiled - it was so weird, but beautiful, to see Harry's parents together, even though not in person yet. They were still here and they were alive. "Sirius is fine. He gave me this room and by the looks of it, he forgot to clean out his nightstand drawer. I'll get him for you now, though."

Hermione opened her bedroom door, holding the broken mirror in her empty hand. She dropped it by accident, revealing her naked legs when she bent down to pick it up - however, she didn't really notice, being too star-struck by the fact that Harry's parents were okay as of right now. She knocked on the door to Sirius's room. It took a few tries until he answered. He leant against the frame, shirtless(to Hermione's embarrassment) and a cigarette hung from his lips. A few scratch marks covered his clavicle and a love bite clung to his neck, forcing red into Hermione's own skin. "Hermione, you back for more?" he asked in that husky voice that made her weak in the knees.

Before she could answer, she pressed the mirror into his hands and turned away. He looked down to see two familiar faces looking back at him. One held the expression of you better tell me everything! And the other one featured a raised eyebrow, berating him silently.

"Prongs! Lils! How goes it? Not heard from you in a while! How's the family?" Sirius asked, ignoring their gestures and damning himself for saying something as stupid as that to her.

James answered with a knowing smirk. "Mum's good - dad's feeling better. How are _you_? Gotten into anyone's knickers lately?"

"James! That's none of your concern!" Lily squeaked.

"Lily! It is my concern because he's _my_ best friend."

Sirius kinda chuckled, "I'm great. Works been going smooth. I have heaps to tell you when you get back. Any baby news yet?" he said, this time looking towards Lily.

"I am sure you do have a lot to tell James," she said with a sarcastic glint in her eyes. "No baby yet; you know we like to do things the old fashioned way! So after the wedding."

"But we haven't given up practising, if you get my meaning!" James winked, earning him a slap on the arm by his fiancée.

"When will you be home?" Sirius asked.

"Soon. I've got to go though." Lily frowned. "I have to be up tremendously early to go with Dorea to York for a luncheon tomorrow. Goodnight, Sirius!" she said then, kissing her future husband on the cheek. "Don't stay up too long, you."

"See you, Lily!" Sirius grinned.

Once she was gone, James turned back to the mirror with a wide smile and enormous eyes. "Soooo…"

Sirius opened the door to a small patio outside his bedroom. "Sooo…" he said back.

"Who is she? How long have you been seeing her? Is it serious? Obviously if she is living with you, it's serious. And I see those markings on your chest, so you're not hiding anything. What was it like? Do you feel more like a man now? And I know you're wanting to do it again, because once you feel that - damn, you can't ever go back," James finished breathlessly.

Sirius lit up another cigarette and laughed. His white teeth glimmering in the moonlight. "Her name is Hermione. I haven't been seeing her. It isn't serious. She needed a place to live. Yes, these markings on my chest are from doing the deed. It was amazing. Manliest feeling in the world. I do want to do it all over again and a thousand times more. And you're exactly right; I'll never look at my hand the same. Really, compared to that, it's let me down." He studied his hand with disappointment.

James's smile only got wider. "Well how do you feel? What made you decide on her?"

"It's a funny story really…"

"Tell. Me. Everything."

Sirius chuckled, "Gods. Remus was right. We really are worse than girls."

….

The Animagus woke to the aroma of coffee swirling up his nose. He stretched his arms above his head and curled his toes to release all the sleep still creeping through his limbs. It was one of the best nights of sleep he could remember having in a long time.

The clock on the wall said it was only five in the morning, which was much too early to be awake. He rolled to his side in hopes to get more sleep, only to see the light from the living room peeking through the cracks of his door. " _Why are you even up right now_?" he whispered to himself but directed to Hermione.

When Hermione had brought him the mirror after their go-around, she seemed hesitant to be near him and that didn't settle well with Sirius. He felt kind of let down that she ran off like she did. However, it was his fault for saying something so daft as "back for more?". He rolled his eyes at himself. He hoped like hell that she didn't regret it, but he had an inkling that she was already there.

He closed his eyes and brought up a memory of her naked body, and he felt that reminder reach his groin. Reluctantly deciding to get out of bed, he headed for the shower. He opened the door as quietly as he could and peeked out to see if Hermione was anywhere to be found - as much as he'd love to see her, he knew it'd make matters downstairs only worse. When he felt he was in the clear, he tiptoed to the bathroom.

Hermione heard the sound of running water as she stirred in her sugar. Sirius was up. She hadn't slept at all, as she was too nervous from talking with Harry's parents and, of course, everything else that had happened. It was just too much to sleep on. So once she heard the early birds whistling their morning tunes, she rolled from her bed fiending for caffeine. She walked over to Sirius's room - his door was left open and the bed unmade. For whatever reason, she went in and began to fix the blankets. A part of her wanted to sit and wait on him to tell him what they did last night was wrong, but at the same time, she felt it'd be best to avoid him altogether. Seeing him just now wouldn't be fun or comfortable for either of them. Fetching her coffee from his dining table, she found a black spiral book she had overlooked before. She was, naturally, curious and opened it to find dozens of charcoal sketchings. Beautifully drawn images, mostly of people, their profiles, eyes, and hands; she saw no one familiar, but all still gorgeous. Come to think of it, she remembered the Sirius of her time always carried around a notebook but he never allowed her to see. He'd say, " _Your eyes are too kind to see such things_." She didn't think that now, of course, as she had seen many things her so-called kind eyes shouldn't have ever seen. However, she began to feel a bit intrusive. She closed the book and placed it back onto the table, adjusting it as though it had never been touched.

She could smell the scent of soap wafting from the bathroom. It was manly, with a hint of patchouli to it as well. Sirius was humming. Hermione tried to listen a little more closely to see what song it was; maybe when she was ready, they could talk about their favourite artists or something. She turned the knob of the door quietly and steam came rolling out, hitting her square in the face. She wiped the condensation aside and listened. Those hums weren't actually a melody, she realised, when a quick, " _Oh...fuck. Ahh._.." was heard. She nearly dropped her cup and managed to close the door as silently she could and sped away.

Sirius was lathering all the way down the length of his cock. His body tightened as he was stroking himself. He was imagining Hermione with her breasts on full display and her wet curly hair sticking to him as her fingers ran over his backside. His abs tightened as he pictured her legs wrapping around his waist, pulling him closer to her. He wanted to devour every inch of her all over again and find places he never knew were possible to reach. He wanted to taste her sweet nectar, to suck on her tongue, like candy. Just imagining her saying his name, let him loose over his fingers and onto the wall of the tub. "Oh...fuck. Ahh…" he murmured. Then the atmosphere changed. Cool air hit his shower curtain. He looked out to see the door handle turning and the latch closing. He kicked himself for not being subtle.

…

Hermione sat on her bed, desperately wishing Sirius would hurry and go to work. Seeing him wasn't what she wanted most in life at the moment. She finished her coffee and set the mug on the bedside table, waiting. She wanted more but thought better of going out there to get it, and hearing Sirius's private thoughts was enough to keep her awake for days. Also, knowing her current streak of luck, if she summoned the pot, Sirius would surely get hit with it and burn his bits to pieces. She waited and waited… she was sure he had to work, but maybe he owled for a day off. Then it came...that inevitable knock on her door. She didn't answer at first. Sirius knocked again. He's persistent. "Come in," she answered, sitting with her arms crossed and as close to the headboard as she could get, trying her best to not look inviting.

He was dressed in his Auror robes and he looked very smart, she thought. Hermione felt her cheeks heat at the sight of him. "I'm off to work, you have any plans for the evening?" he asked, as if nothing were wrong.

She shook her head.

"I was thinking maybe I would catch a bite to eat and then meet up with Remus, if you'd like to come along," he said with all sincerity in his voice.

She would love to see Remus again, but wasn't sure if it'd be a good idea to go with Sirius by herself. She licked her bottom lip as if in deep thought. "Well, I don't know. Surely you'd like some guy time?"

He shrugged, "Honestly? I'm looking for an excuse to spend time with you again."

She looked at her empty cup. "Oh. I don't know." Her shoulders dropped. She didn't want to sound mean but it needed to be said. "What we did last night…"

Sirius's frame tightened - he just knew she had regretted it. "Look, I am sorry. I mean, I'm not sorry it happened because it was amazing… but..."

"Was it?" she asked, interrupting him.

The man furrowed his brow in confusion, " _What_? Yes. It was amazing... Heh… more than that. I'd say you're an _ace_. Of course, I've no one to compare to, but honestly, I don't want to compare. I really enjoyed my time with you. I don't want you to think that I regret it, because I don't."

She felt her body go hot. She was embarrassed for him and herself. These types of things shouldn't come so easily out of one's mouth, especially to a woman. "I just don't think we should do it again. We should forget about it. Pretend as if it never happened. Because it shouldn't have happened." She spoke softly, avoiding his eyes - even in her time, something about his eyes would reel her right in.

"Why would I pretend it didn't happen?" he asked, his confusion only escalating.

"Because! It shouldn't have! It's not what's supposed to happen, you and I! "We-" she waved between them, "-are not supposed to happen! Now if you don't mind, I need to… I have a lot… go. Have a good day." She stood, pushing him to the door. "Goodbye."

He was stunned by her attitude: he didn't think she'd be acting so strangely about it. He subtly nodded his head, disappointed, "Ok. I'll see you later then." He turned to leave.

"Sirius…wait," she said, stepping back from him. She could see the hurt all over his face. He had been nothing but kind to her - then she basically used him. And this is how I am repaying him! "I'm sorry. I can't get caught up in things like this. I've used you and I shouldn't have. I've lost too many people and I don't want the chance to get attached in a way like that just to feel loss all over again."

He nodded, "I understand, but you see, if you want to put it that way… then I used you as well. Have a good day, Ace."

Slightly taken aback by his bluntness and the use of the pet name - as she already hated them - it brought back a memory, one she thought she'd forgotten.

...

 _Hermione sat at the piano in Grimmauld Place, not pressing any keys, only staring at the black and white pattern, in deep thought about the next step they - she , Harry, and Ron - needed to take. Arthur, Ron's dad had been attacked by Nagini, the snake of Lord Voldemort, to the point that if Harry hadn't the premonition, Arthur would be dead._

 _"What's going on?"a deep, husky voice asked._

 _Hermione looked up and into the kind blue eyes she found so hypnotising. She knew whatever Sirius would say next would make her feel better; even if "better" was the last thing she wanted to feel. The Christmas tree's lights shone around him like silhouetted wings. He stood out like a dark angel. "Only thinking," she answered._

 _"Knowing you, you've got about a hundred different things running around that head of yours. What is it?" He moved to sit beside her on the bench. He rested his hand on her knee to comfort her, but gripped tightly as if he was protecting her._

 _"Just that. A hundred things." She shook her head. "All of this that's happened. Mr Weasley didn't deserve what he got. He is one of the kindest, most gentle men I have ever met and he didn't deserve it. Lucius Malfoy is surely behind it. He's always had it out against the Weasleys," she said._

 _"That's the thing, kid. Bad things happen to good people all of the time." He felt her head rest on his shoulder. "You know in the time of war, things happen that you just can't understand. People die every day. Everyone loses people that they love - people get hurt… people are manipulated, tortured - and feel stuck in the middle trying to find the right side. The winning side. People go missing, only to be found… differently," he said quietly. "Not everyone is who they make themselves out to be. Not everyone deserves what they've gotten."_

 _Hermione took in every bit of what he was saying. Even if parts didn't sit well with her. She was still so full of questions. "So you're saying that Lucius Malfoy is a good guy, then?"_

 _"No. That isn't what I am saying at all. I'm saying his intentions aren't necessarily in the right place. Maybe he feels trapped and he's trying to protect his son or his wife…" Hermione sat up and looked back at him. He bore a sad smile and his face was telling, but of what she didn't know. He spoke again with what it seemed like reluctance, "You'll never know in these times where someone's true allegiance lies. Lucius, believe as you may, wasn't always a bad guy. Had you known him way back when, you would understand what I mean."_

 _Hermione twiddled her thumbs and shrugged. "Well, until I see otherwise, I guess I'll go on only wondering."_

 _With eyes still a torrent of emotions, he nodded, "You're Ace at everything. You'll figure it all out."_

 _She snorted. "Ace? I'm not so sure about that. Brains with academics, maybe. But street smart? Not so much."_

 _He smiled, "I know enough of how your mind works. You'll figure it out." He pressed his lips against her temple, "Ace," he whispered and walked away, leaving her with even more questions than she had before._

Hermione ran to the bathroom and spewed right into the sink - she didn't possess the willpower to make it to the toilet. It was only a coincidence. It had to be. Sirius didn't know her from now in the future - he could only possibly know her future self… right? She wondered in what timeline she had really been born. Was she only existing in limbo? Was her life really in the 1990s, or here and now? The past - was that her real future? She gathered herself, splashed her face with cold water - her knuckles turned white as she held onto the sink's basin. If Sirius had known her, that meant she had come back before - which meant things between she and he weren't all that bad. And if his intentions toward her were good then… she stared at her reflection, wrapping her mind around the situation, when the realization finally hit her - Future Sirius, the Sirius in her memory, knew about the sex they'd had. "Oh my god!"


	5. Portrait of the Tortured

**A/N:** Hey guys! Sorry it's been a minute since I've updated! A lot has been going on - but it's here now! I have Chapter 6 written as well, but it's gotta through my love beta **ravenclawmidwife** ; who is just so wonderful and looks after my words and cleans up my messes! So, please give her a round of applause! This was a pretty fin chapter to write! New characters are introduced - perhaps you can find an Easter Egg hidden! I'd love to know what you think, so let me know in the reviews! Xo Blue

* * *

 _6 May 1979_

Sirius sat at his desk with an untouched bagel and a full take-away cup of tea. He stared menacingly at the caseload of files stacked before him. He knew he should get started before one of the senior aurors got angry with him; instead he went on staring. His body was present, but his mind was not. Last night was such a big step in life for him and, maybe he was overthinking the situation, but he kept thinking about what Hermione had said before he left - " _we are not supposed to happen!"_ \- her amber eyes were full of unshed tears. He could _feel_ her hurt and smell her distrust - which was normal as they only just met one another. Still, it bothered him. Was it he who made her fearful? What happened in her past to cause so much agony? Had the one they call the Dark Lord brought her so much death and pain? There were so many unanswered questions and Sirius feared they'd never get answered.

He knew he shouldn't get attached to her. He didn't even know her middle name, yet he'd slept with her like a fool. He always heard about people doing one-night-stands and how it was a fun pastime and it helped one to live their life freely. Hell, even Mr Remus _Keep-It-In-Your-Trousers_ Lupin thought it was a good idea. Unfortunately, Sirius disagreed, because he liked Hermione and he really wanted to get to know her - possibly be friends with her. As of now though, he felt like he'd lost all chance of that.

" _Black."_

Sirius's left cheek was squished beneath his hand, it was beginning to feel tingly and on the edge of becoming numb. His eyes were completely glazed over and red, looking as if he hadn't slept in days. He could hear his name being called, yet it wasn't triggering his awareness that he was being spoken to.

" _Black?"_

 _Maybe I should just ask her to move out._ He shook his head inwardly. _No. That would be stupid… she needs a place. Maybe I'll move out. Yeah… I'll move._ He grimaced. _No. That'd be stupid too. It's my bloody apartment. She needs to move._ His thoughts were running amok, organizing plans without his approval. _Maybe I'm overreacting. Yes. That's it. No one has to move. We will get past this -_

" _Oi! Sirius? You in there, man?"_ The man calling waved his hand drastically over the latter's face.

Sirius was taken aback and looked up to find Longbottom hovering over the front of his desk. " _Hmmph_? Longbottom, sorry, mate." He reached his hand over to shake his friend's. "Long night."

Frank nodded worriedly and patted Sirius on the back. "Ye look as you've had a rough go." Sirius shrugged as if that was saying the least. "Everything 'right wi' ye, then?"

Black grabbed the tea, taking in a full, cold gulp of it. Disgusted, he tossed it in the waste basket, and said, "I'm fine. Long night, that's all. No need to worry."

Unconvinced, Frank narrowed his eyes, but left it at that. "Uh-huh. Well, I talked wi' my friend as ye asked - he said he'd do it."

Sirius had nearly forgotten about asking Frank to talk to the Investigator. "Ah? That's good I s'pose… how much do I owe?"

Frank shook his head, "None for you to worry wi' - he owed me. Should take him a week or so." He grinned and sat at his desk.

"I feel that maybe I've made a mistake," Sirius said finally. Frank nodded for him to go on. " _Maybe_ Hermione is just as normal as you and I."

Frank chuckled, "Most people _are_ as normal as we. But there's a sure way of finding out. You either find it was a mistake and ye were only lookin' out for your best interest or ye find something and you were right in trustin' your gut. All said and done, it's free."

Sirius sighed, "You're right."

"I ken you well enough, Black. If ye had a feelin' something is off, you'd be the first to figure it out. Trust yourself above all others."

"But what if I'm wrong?"

Frank rubbed his head. It wasn't everyday that Sirius Black betrayed the cocky know-it-all attitude. "It happens to the best of us."

….

"Black! Come! Now!" Moody commanded, as he power-walked into the Auror Department, throwing his office door open with his wand. Sirius, completely befuddled as to what he might have done to piss his boss off today, glanced over to Longbottom, who, in return, blinked and shook his head. The man dubiously scooted from his seat and sauntered into the office.

Moody was scribbling hastily over a case before he looked up, his face grim, serious, and scarier than ever. "We've got something big 'bout to happen and you're going to be the lead. I've got a team to build up. Be ready to go by tonight. Seven. Go home, pack light."

His heart thumped disturbingly fast against his chest. _Lead?_ " _Sir_? Where are we going? And my other mission," Knots tightened in his stomach and his hands began to sweat. He _knew_ it wasn't going to be good; one might say, an _animal_ instinct.

"Top secret. You'll get the information when it's time. McLaggen and Moore will take over here. Go." Moody glanced up to see Sirius standing with fear, "Sorry, Black. You know what ye signed up for."

"I do, sir. But am I trained well enough? It's been… months since we've had proper training."

Moody scoffed, "You're an Auror, Black. You tell good from evil and you fuckin' fight against the bad. What more do you need to train on?"

With that answer, Sirius turned on his heel and out of the office. Sirius _did_ know from the get-go with this job that there were _always_ chances of dying or of finding oneself in potentially grim situations. But he had been so used to worrying with silly projects, like dung bomb explosions, he'd forgotten that there were more desperate happenings in the world. He hadn't taken the time to really work on the training this type of mission needed of late. He also knew at times Alastor Moody would exaggerate the facts and he could see it written all over his features, but today was… different. His leader looked genuinely spooked and concerned. He side-swiped his shoulder into someone walking past him. "Sorry." He muttered, not really meaning it.

"No worries, you knob," she answered. Her raspy voice caught his attention. He stopped in his tracks and turned around. " _Marley_. You're back."

….

"I'm back. How's life?" Her Australian accent was thicker than ever. She had been visiting her family for a reason Sirius had regrettably forgotten (as he had other things, like writing to her).

"I'm overwhelmed. About to go on a mission that I have no details about." He rubbed his chin, feeling his scruff growing in. "How are you? Your visit home go all right?" Marlene's and Sirius's relationship was very up-and-down. She'd wanted more from him for the longest time – and after a series of unfortunate events that happened between them, he only wanted a friendship. He and Marlene had been each other's first kiss, first boyfriend and girlfriend. They loved each other to pieces, but it never worked out quite right; the lowest moment revolved around a fight concerning her desire for intimacy when he wasn't ready, after which she went and found a willing Slytherin guy a year ahead of them to explore sex with. That was a memory that he didn't want to think of just now. Sirius had forgiven her for it of course after some time, but things were never really the same after that.

Marley's expression went solemn. "It wasn't the best."

Sirius narrowed his eyes. "Why?"

She ruffled her curls, pressing the palm of her hand against the centre of her forehead, "You've really no idea, do you? That much going on with you since I've been gone?" She shook her head, without even giving him a chance to say anything. "I imagine so, since I hadn't one bloody letter from you." She rolled her eyes. "I told you, I had to Obliviate my parents and move them elsewhere." She scoffed with resentment at Sirius's surprised reaction. She reached over and pushed his hair aside, "Forgetful you are. I am a Muggle-born, Sirius, one of many that that madman Voldemort is ordering his loony army to kill."

Sirius had to pull his jaw from the floor. "I am terribly sorry, mate." He squeezed her shoulder. "You're right. A lot has been going on. I wish I could have been there for you." He was sincere.

She gave a small, grateful smile. "Life goes on. But I have to go, Moody is waiting for me. We can talk more later." She reached over and rubbed his wrist. "Love you." The sound of her saying that frustrated him. She stood there, bitched, and made excuses for him as to why he couldn't do anything, then made him feel stupid and inferior for pointing out facts that he already knew. He stood frozen for a minute, feeling completely awful from her guilt-trip. Hearing his boss greet her got him to move his feet and leave. As he turned around, everything _Marlene_ left his mind and his thoughts went straight to…

….

 _Hermione_ stood in the kitchen, staring out the windows at the darkened skies. Through the morning, she had gone through some old diaries, most of which were Narcissa complaining about her family's ill will toward Lucius Malfoy ( _Surprising,_ she thought). Nothing had really jumped out at her as of yet, though she could only read so much of " _Mummy and Daddy are so unfair to me! Bella is in love with who she's married to! And Andy!_ " before she felt ready to tear her hair out.

"Even though Andromeda wasn't even a part of the Black Family Tree anymore for loving who she wanted," Hermione sighed.

 _Why can't I? I don't want to bloody marry Rabastan I-hate-everything Lestrange. He's much too broody…._

Blah, blah, blah.

Obviously Narcissa had gotten her way in the end, but dear all things holy, was she always whinging?! Certainly there had to be something of good information or else the woman wouldn't have given all these possessions over to Hermione so freely. She figured tomorrow she'd go through a different diary – what she knew she needed to do was find out more about Regulus Black. She had no clue where to even begin on him. He could be on a mission for Voldemort, for all she knew. She gritted her teeth at the thought of Narcissa obviously knowing Hermione had been here before. But one question filled her mind over and over again and it started with one single word: Why? _Why_ had she failed the first time – what and where did she go wrong? She knew that she was a very calculated person – didn't act on impulse unless for an absolute life-or-death cause.

She thought about the times she had brought Regulus up to Sirius in the past – _future –_ she reminded herself. He was always so angry about it – he desperately seemed as if he didn't want to believe that Regulus was actually a good person, but maybe that had to do with the fact that Sirius also said he should've listened to whomever in the past ( _was it me_?) – and that was his way of forgiving himself for condemning his little brother.

She leant against the counter, tapping her lower lip. It was giving her a migraine trying to piece it all together. It definitely wasn't any ordinary jigsaw puzzle. Hermione didn't blame Sirius for feeling the way he did, but perhaps she'd have to give it a go, help to mend things between them.

First things first – she needed to find out Regulus's whereabouts and soon. The clock on the stove said it was half past noon, still early enough in the day that she could start her research and be back home before Sirius. Not that it mattered, however, it would save her breath from answering a series of questions. Looking back through the window, she yearned for the sky to be blue and the sun to shine, but was instead met with dreariness and rain. "No one would be out in this. Not even a stupid Death Eater," she said to herself, as a crack of lightening struck the sky. " _Hmmph_." _Maybe tomorrow._ Procrastinating, she decided on going out and purchasing a pair of rain boots. Seemed like a legitimate enough reason to wait just one more day.

….

It was silly, really - being born into high society of the wizarding world. Narcissa Black had wondered ever since she was a small girl why she had to be so prim and proper. Two hours of her day, she'd wear a back brace to keep her posture straight. _No, Narcissa, you can't take it off. No, Narcissa, you can't skip today._ She hated dressing a certain way constantly; she swore her family was stuck in a time-lapse of the early eighteen hundreds with the large hats and long dresses that covered the entirety of one's body. _No, Narcissa, this. No, Narcissa, that._ She swore it was her name half the time.

Narcissa Belle Black was a pretty young woman and the lastborn of three sisters. Andromeda, the eldest, had been marked off the family tree as she had gone and gotten herself married to a Mudblood, much to Narcissa's displeasure. Andy was her best friend and they still secretly talked, especially since Andy had given her a sweet new niece. Bellatrix had been married earlier in the year to Rodolphus Lestrange - who had a brother that was very much available. Narcissa's parents were persistent in making sure she and he were matched, though the betrothal was still in negotiations.

It was her weekly luncheon with her mother, Druella, and her sister Bellatrix, at the only ritzy 'good enough' restaurant close to the Black family home. Narcissa desperately wanted to skip the lunch and stay home to read, as the weather was frightful and stormy. Druella and Bella were going on and on about Bellatrix's pregnancy. Mrs Black was so proud and absolutely sure that Bella would be having a sweet baby boy - an heir to the _Black_ _Family_ _Throne_.

"We both know Cissy will have girls," Druella said accusingly.

Bellatrix laughed.

Narcissa sat quietly and sipped her tea, her shoulders desperately wishing to slouch. The talk around her faded into garbled noise as she fiddled with the necklace around her neck. It was an anniversary gift from her sweetheart, Lucius Malfoy. They had been together since year five at Hogwarts, and in her heart and mind, were destined to be so forever.

However, in the House of Black, a spouse was usually assigned by one's parents, with no choice but to marry or else be struck off the family tree and deemed a blood-traitor or useless; whatever, it was all stupid to her. She didn't want to marry Bellatrix's husband's brother, Rabastan. He was a decent looking man and had plenty of money - he was just not the one for her. Bella had gotten lucky with Rodolphus, as they were always sweet on one another. Narcissa tried to reason with her mother that times were changing, but Druella Black insisted otherwise.

"Cissy, what do you think, darling?" she heard her mother ask.

She turned to the pale-faced woman. Druella was extremely beautiful, even in her older age. Her hair was black as ebony and her lips red as blood. "About what, Mother?" she said in return.

She knew this would infuriate the woman, as she wasn't paying any mind to what she and her sister were talking about. That's not … " _what proper women do, Narcissa Belle!_ Listen! For the sake of my sanity. I said, what do you think of a December wedding?" her voice was shrill but quiet. Bella frowned; she was Mother's favourite pet on the outside, but behind closed doors was a completely different story.

"For who, Mother?" Narcissa asked kindly. She knew exactly for who.

Druella was clearly trying to keep her temper in check. It wasn't _proper_ to act so callous in public. "You and Rabastan, dearest." She gritted through her teeth. "I think that we could start getting you fitted for a wedding gown. Ivory would look so pretty on you. I _do_ think," she reached over to her daughter and pinched the small amount of skin from Narcissa's arm, "you should slim a bit. You've gained some weight. I'll tell the elves to quit bringing you a full breakfast. I think restricting the morning meal to a cup of yogurt and a fruit shall do you some good."

The blonde only smiled, "You're _absolutely_ right. I was thinking the same thing this morning, except not about me." Her attention moved to the spitting image of their mum. "You've gained as well, sister. Anything to say about that, Mother? Surely, she will need to maintain a healthy weight for that precious baby boy she is carrying." Narcissa blurted. Her heart raced as she said it, but the words felt so good when they left her lips.

Druella snapped her head toward Narcissa so fast that Narcissa was sure she heard a bone pop. The woman reached beneath the table and pinched her youngest daughter's thigh. "That is your last warning. Act out again and you will be dismissed," she seethed.

"Oh, please, Mother, stop. You'll give yourself a nosebleed. I'll excuse myself." Narcissa stood from her chair before Druella could pinch or pull at her again. She could sense the people around her staring. "See you at home." She tilted her head, "Mother. Sister."

Bellatrix's eyes widened at her younger sister's attitude. Narcissa wasn't sure if she could see proudness or prudishness, but either way, she would hear about it later.

Out of the door she fled and nearly bumped into a passerby. "So sorry," she murmured and looked into the raining sky. She breathed out and felt free for the first time. The rain washed away her anger. She was used to being poked and pinched and even smacked by her mother, but she was _so_ tired of it! She could scream! Stepping away from the wretched restaurant, she went down the pavement toward a small shop - one she'd had her eye on for ages in that Muggle town.

Inside, the bell chimed. The smell was floral and sweet, the floors wooden and shiny. There were racks of colourful clothing circling around and the walls were covered with ornamental jewelry. The faint sound of Muggle music played in the background. All of the witchy shops she shopped at in Diagon Alley never looked as stylish and fabulous as this. " _Hi_! Welcome to Frankie's!" A woman dressed in a light blue shawl and an interesting pair of bottoms came waltzing up to Narcissa, who in return was slightly taken aback at the friendly openness of the shop-keeper. "Is there anything I can help ya find?"

The blonde shook her head, "No. Thank you." She reached inside her bag to make sure she had Muggle currency on her. Slowly, she began to tour her way around the store. There were so many different outfits. Narcissa was dying to get her hands on some of the things and knew very well if she was seen wearing them, her Mother would have her head on a platter and served for Christmas dinner.

" _Um, yes. Do you have a size five and a half?"_ Narcissa peeked around the corner to see a curly-haired brunette sitting on a black bench, trying on a pair of odd shoes. The same woman who greeted her, smiled toward Narcissa and went into the back to retrieve whatever it was the woman on the bench had asked for. The brunette turned around as well looking right at Narcissa. Something flitted in the sitting's eyes. Narcissa went to turn away but was stopped when the brunette called out to her. "You look lost," she said kindly.

Narcissa nodded. "Only a bit. I'm terribly sorry. What are _those_ you're trying on?" she asked.

The brunette glanced down at the shoes sitting beside her. "Oh, these are Wellies. They help to keep your feet from getting wet in weather such as this!"

Narcissa frowned, "Why didn't I ever think of that?" She sat down alongside the woman and reached for the discarded boots. "Do you mind?"

The latter smiled, "Not at all. Those don't fit me, the clerk was headed to the back for another pair."

As Narcissa kicked off one of her high heels and pulled the boots over her feet, she found they were quite comfortable. "I love them! They are so interesting." She studied them, enjoying the look of the buckle that wrapped around the ankle of the shoe. "Thank you so much for allowing me to try them on- _er_?"

"Hermione." She held out her hand for Narcissa to shake. "There isn't anything to thank me for. But they do look lovely."

….

Hermione heard the bell ring at the start of the store, then the greeting of the shop-keeper. She sat on the bench trying on a pair of flowered rain boots, which were a bit too small. She had half a mind to magick them to the proper size and buy them that way, but was instead met with, " _Are you finding everything alright? Can I get you a different size?"_ The lady was so posh.

"Um, yes. Do you have size five and a half?" Hermione asked.

"I'm sure we do. Allow me to check the back for you." She smiled down at Hermione, then up at the other customer.

Hermione followed suit and found the familiar, _younger_ face of Narcissa Malfoy. Her smile was about to falter at the realisation, so she turned around before the woman could take offense. _She's not a Malfoy, yet. She's still a Black._ She turned back to see Narcissa still standing there. Hermione bucked up her the courage and said, "You look lost."

They spoke about the shoes and how they fit Narcissa so well. They exchanged names and Hermione was surprised at the fact that the woman sitting beside her was easy to talk to - in fact, her whole persona was different from the one she knew in the future. She had kind eyes and elegant apparel, yet, something about her was fiercer than she had ever noticed before. And the Narcissa Malfoy of 1998 had been intimidating.

The woman with the shoes reappeared with the right size. "Oh, looks like the two of you will be shoe twins!" She guffawed at her own joke. Narcissa and Hermione shared their own chortle when the woman pranced away.

"I was actually going to magick that pair to fit me, but I was too afraid I'd get caught." Hermione said suddenly, taking Narcissa by surprise.

"M-magic? You…" she leaned in and whispered into Hermione's ear. "Are you a _witch_?"

Hermione laughed, "Well, aren't you?"

Narcissa wasn't sure what to say to this. She was in complete shock. "How do you know?"

Hermione's face went blank, "I'm a Seer," she said with all seriousness.

The blonde's eyes widened, "Are you, really?"

Hermione shook her head with a wide grin, "No! I'm a witch. I've seen you around Diagon Alley," she played. She was taken by the fact that Narcissa wasn't snobbish. And she supposed her nervousness is what made her so apt to mess around in such a fashion.

Narcissa smiled, "You had my heart pounding through my corset. I was rather confused. I didn't understand it!" She chuckled.

Hermione shook her head, "Do you not joke often?"

"Joke? No, I'm afraid not." Narcissa frowned, not wanting to admit that she wasn't really even sure what a _joke_ was.

Hermione nodded, "Well, I'm sorry for your scare." Her brows rose when she saw that Narcissa had pulled from her handbag a rather significant amount of Muggle money.

"It's all right, but I best be off. I can't wait to show off my new boots. Mother will think they are hideous! Just what I am hoping for," she sniggered.

Hermione stood as well, "They look great! Maybe not with that dress, but your next step will need to be a pair of these." She flourished her hand over her blue jeans.

Narcissa nodded, "They are quite… _interesting_. One step at a time, though. Mother will likely die of a heart attack just seeing me in these. I can only imagine how she'd react if she thought I'd never ride a broom side saddle again." They shared a smile and acknowledgement of what Narcissa meant. "It was really lovely meeting you, Hermione. If you ever see me around, please do not hesitate in saying hello."

"Just the same, Narcissa." Hermione watched as the woman grabbed her black high-heeled shoes and carried them beneath her arm away to pay for the Muggle rubber boots she had on her feet.

" _I can't wait to meet you, Hermione Granger"_ is what Narcissa had said to her before she left. Hermione knew she needed to change the past, but in her heart - well, this moment, she hoped, never changed.


	6. I'm a Fight with Myself

**A/N:** Two updates within two days?! What! haha - no I had written chapter six soon after five, but I needed to get it beta'd before I posted; which means, another round of applause to **ravenclawmidwife** for all her hard work! I appreciate the reviews, you guys really rock. I apologize that Narcissa wasn't sarcastic enough for you **JuliaLestrange**... Here's your next chapter! Seven should be up soon, if not, please forgive me! Lots of love, Blue.

* * *

 _5 May 1979_

Sirius raced home through the storm in his Animagus form. His silky black coat stuck up every which way, as his paws splashed into puddles and dirty water spilled over him. The rain fell hard, droplets the size of galleons. This was one of those times he wished he had the floo connected to his flat but for the sake of unannounced visitors such as Moody, he made the sacrifice. He fumbled in his pockets for his keys and shook off the rain as if he was still in his animal form. He stepped inside his home. All the lights were off and he could smell only a faint, lingering trace of Hermione's perfume, telling him she wasn't there. He slid the door closed and kicked off his boots, peeled his Auror robes from his body and dropped them to the floor; leaving him shirtless with his trousers resting low on his waist. He slid those off, too, now clad in just his underwear, sopping wet clothes laid at his feet. There was no harm in his walking around naked,if Hermione wasn't there, and it could very well be his last night on earth – though if he were honest, he'd not mind seeing that vixen of a woman he was residing with prance around in the nude, either. That thought in particular broke through the chill that had creeped into his bones with the news of his mission. Sirius glanced at the clock; he still had four hours before he had to leave. He reached up to comb through his hair with his fingers as a makeshift brush, but found quickly that the rain had matted it into fine knots, and his transformation left it smelling like a wet dog. He grimaced and headed toward the bathroom – only to be distracted by the closed door to his left. Knowing very well he was the only one home, he still glanced over his shoulder to be sure no one else was there. He reached out for the bronze knob of Hermione's bedroom door and felt the magic resonating from it. He went to turn it only to find that it was… _locked._

 _Damn it!_

He knew it was wrong, but he wanted to snoop. He wanted to see if he could find anything interesting, and was sure that he would. He was too impatient to wait for the results from the P.W.I. – another thought which left him feeling guilty. Why couldn't he just let her be? He shook away his self-reproach and summoned his wand. He could tell the magic was very strong, but it felt familiar. He was sure that the witch wouldn't use a simple spell such as Alohomora to lock her things away. He held his wand to the door and began to whisper enchantments – but found none were working.

" _What the bloody hell… you are a smart little witch, aren't you?"_ he whispered. It had to have been all of fifteen minutes before he gave up. Sirius felt a bit put out about it. He'd been sure his advanced magical training as an Auror would have come to good use and he was perturbed. What could be so illicit that she needed to ward her room – in the flat she shared… _with an Auror_? he wondered. _Maybe you're overreacting, mate._ He summed it up to that – perhaps he _was_ reading too much into the situation because he didn't like the way things were going for him with her. But just for good measure, he tried the unlocking charm and nothing happened. He sighed and went to the shower, not hearing the click of the lock opening.

After a good scrub and a quick shave, Sirius once again found himself hoping Hermione would be back before he left. He kept imagining her pretty eyes; if he could see them – maybe it'd send him off with hope. He chided himself for being so hesitate about her. He wanted to like her, to develop a romantic relationship with her, but also felt that he needed to hold her at arm's length. Either way, he'd respect her wishes in the end. If there was to be nothing between them, fine. He was perfectly okay and capable of being just flatmates with her _and_ if the universe called for it: her friend. Damn it though – something about her moved something within him. Even before they'd slept together, she was so alluring. Seeing her in that pub that night, sitting all alone… she was so…

 _Beautiful. He had noticed her as soon as he walked through the doors of the Leaky Cauldron after what had been possibly the worst mission he had ever embarked upon. It had been boring, stupid, yet funny all at the same time. His day took a turn for the good when he saw her there, sitting demurely, unaware of the appreciative eyes lingering upon her. No man had the confidence to make their approach, angelic as she appeared. Knowing very well he smelled like stink pellets, Sirius wasn't sure if he himself could muster up the ability to speak to her. Instead, he sat a few stools down from the pretty woman in faded pink. She didn't look natural sitting alone, yet she seemed to be content, though her shoulders gave evidence of some distress._

 _Tom, the barkeep, set a plate of food down before the lady and she picked the fork up elegantly enough that Sirius wondered if she was a part of a royal family, perhaps someone he hadn't the pleasure of meeting yet (As a Black, he'd grown up meeting and greeting the rich, famous, and powerful of their world, for Walburga considered it their duty as wizarding royalty to host elegant and elaborate dinner parties.) He dismissed that possibility moments later when she mowed down the food like she hadn't eaten in ages. No one in the Twenty-Eight would eat in such a way – not even he, who had almost entirely rejected his upbringing. He wasn't going to comment, but the way she moaned about how good the food had tasted, he couldn't help but to start up a conversation with her._

" _You know. I never thought that the Leaky's food was that great. You are making it look quite wonderful. Tom, I'll have what she's having!" he said, kicking himself internally for that being all he could come up with._

 _The woman turned to him – her cheeks were blushing the colour of her dress and her eyes were the prettiest shade of brown he had ever seen. She narrowed her eyes at him, and almost seemed put-out by his comment. He was about to chalk it up to her recognising him and being starstruck. Instead, she asked, "And who are you?", taking his ego down a few notches. However, he played it coy and smirked. A woman who didn't know who he was could very well be a blessing in disguise. He could play it up and sweep her from her feet. It had been a while since he'd had a decent snog. So he raised his mug and said, "Whoever you want me to be." Her quiet laugh twisted something inside of him._

 _He watched as she finished her food and listened as she spoke softly to Tom. Her voice was like liquid silk. "I'll be down as soon as the sun rises. No need to worry yourself," she said. This caught Sirius's attention – why was she staying in such an establishment? Surely, a woman like herself wouldn't be resting her head in the likes of this place._

" _The morning? You're staying here?" he asked before he could stop himself._

 _She turned to him with a look of surprise – as if she wondered why he'd care whether or not she stayed there. Her cheeks lit up again with what was likely embarrassment, but the lighting from the candelabra on the bar counter hit her at an angle that made him weak in the knees. She looked like a goddess - the candle's glow across her creamy complexion and the way her honey-brown hair fell in waves around her face caused Sirius to trip over his own tongue; she was his own personal enchantress. He didn't realize it yet, but he'd become a puppet on a string for her._

" _Know of any good flats?" she asked. He watched as her top teeth scraped over her bottom lip._

 _He smirked, not knowing the next few words out of his mouth would be: "I do. Just so happens I am in the market for a roommate." What? He surprised himself with that. First – he'd never had a female as a flatmate, and secondly, he could already hear the ribbing he'd receive from his mates, not that it mattered. The offer struck him off guard almost as much as it did her._

 _She asked him a few more questions, seeming a mixture of being appalled and pleasantly surprised that he'd offer her a home. Though he was questioning his own motives as to why he jumped the wand like that, he shot her his trademark smirk and said he'd meet her in the morning. He swaggered over to her and stood, just as he was about to tell her goodbye – he smelled it; knowing that scent like the back of his hand._

 _She stunk of a Black._

 _He scanned over her subtly as if he was checking her out – nothing about her screamed his family name. He triggered his K-9 senses – it was definitely there, but it wasn't – her natural smell was stronger. Reluctantly, he nodded and said, "see you tomorrow, Hermione." and walked away. He shook his head, hoping he was imagining it._

Two days later, he still wondered, _why_ he'd noticed that momentary headwind of his family. He'd waited to notice the scent again, but he never did.

….

Hours ago, Hermione stepped inside her favourite store; Flourish and Blotts, hoping to find a book on time-travel. She hadn't realised the time she had spent in there until a crack of thunder shook the entirety of the shop. She stood from her spot on the carpeted floor, cradling the book she had found within her arms and descended the stairs to the register. She plopped the large tome onto the counter full of bibelots and other random goodies to see that no one was there to check her out. She looked around and back again. Against the register, a small silver bell sat with a tiny sign: _Ring for assistance!_ She always hated doing that – if someone was away, it obviously meant they were busying themselves with their job… well, that was how she felt for herself anyway. Regretfully, she dabbed the bell with the palm of her hand and a very very familiar voice called out: " _Give me one… minute!"_ She could hear him say along with his boots cascading down the stairs.

It was very much less that sixty seconds when Remus Lupin came piling around the corner with seven books in his arms, two beneath each, and a quill in his mouth. He dropped them onto the counter and started to apologise when he recognised Hermione from the night before. "Hermione, right?" he smiled.

She smiled back with the same amount of brightness. "Yes! I didn't know you worked here!" she leant over the counter and whispered, "I wasn't sure anyone worked here, really." She really hadn't thought that. It was always best for her to be left to her own devices when inside a bookstore. So finding Remus was a sweet surprise.

He had just as much eagerness as she. "I only just got the job, actually. I know, you're probably thinking I am the biggest swot! Really, I am sorry… You were so quiet, I hadn't the slightest you were here."

Hermione chuckled, "It's okay, really." Sure, being around Sirius again was wonderful – but his younger self was something to get used to. Remus had always an old soul, so being with him again felt right. Comfortable. "I am glad I hadn't interrupted you from your work." she flourished her hand around, "I love bookshops. This one in particular." She could see he was eyeing her curiously, so she quickly added, "I've come across many bookshops and this one has bested them all. _And..."_ she reached over and patted his hand, "you're not a swot."

He nodded, "I have to agree. I was like a child dancing on Christmas morning when I received the letter asking for me to come and work."

Hermione was so truly happy for him. She could see the outlines of scars over his youthful face, but nothing too deep. His eyes were so full of life and harbored no pain or sorrow. "So, are you going to be time-traveling soon?"

Hermione swallowed hard, forgetting all about the book that laid before her. "W-what?" she asked.

Remus pointed down to the book, "The book? I was just joking, asking if you were about to travel in time."

"Oh!" she pressed her hand against her chest, "I just find it fascinating," she said convincingly. "I love to learn about everything. Who's the swotty one now?" she asked, hoping to change the subject.

He could only laugh, completely forgetting about her confusion. "How about we both be the swottiest of them all, then?"

"Perfect!" They shared their laughter again and spoke about the book no more. They instead talked about the other books the unknown werewolf plopped before them minutes before.

She glanced at her watch and noticed how late it was getting – then her attention went to the window, showing the darkness of the weather outside. It hadn't changed from the two hours before. It really was one of the main reasons why she had stopped in the first place – well _that_ and because she was curious about the rules of time and how many she had broken, or would break (though Narcissa might be sure she could change the past – surely there were repercussions to be considered). "I get off in fifteen minutes. If you want to wait, I'll walk you home. No reason for you to go alone," Remus said, sounding hopeful.

Hermione's eyes brightened. This was exactly what she was looking for, what she'd waited for: companionship. She nodded, "I'd love that, Remus. Thank you."

His smile was crooked. Hermione had a split moment of seeing his future face – she turned away quickly so as to not show her remorse. He ran a hand over his sandy hair. "I'm going to put these away. Won't take long." He reloaded his arms with the books and disappeared around the corner.

Hermione sat down on the wooden bench. She wanted to cry – but she knew she couldn't – not without questions being asked. And even though she _knew_ one hundred percent that she could trust and rely on Remus, her journey wasn't something she could spring onto him just now. She needed to really gather trust and friendship with him before anything could be said. She watched as the rain poured outside, trying to keep her thoughts away from the sadness that laid within the future.

She jumped at his touch to her shoulder. "I'm so sorry!" he apologised.

"It's okay." she answered as soon as she gathered her breath. "Just a little jumpy these days."

Remus nodded – he understood. "Life is going to be like that for some time." She needn't explain, he would silently understand and that's what she needed most from anyone – but she was grateful for it coming from him. He held out his hand to help her from her seat, took her bags, and they set out into the storm. Taking his wand from his rain cloak, he held it straight up and a semi-transparent umbrella glowed blue, stopping the rain from drenching them, leaving a circle over them with raindrops dripping around them to their feet. "I've not used that one before," Hermione said, impressed.

Remus's cheeks coloured a deep pink, but was glad that the darkness would hide it. "Well, to be perfectly honest – this was the first time I've used it as well. I only just read about it."

Hermione stifled her laugh, "I think it's wonderful," she announced proudly.

For the first time, happiness was making its way into her heart – but she quickly noticed it and allowed the guilt to sink right back in. It wasn't fair for her to be smiling and getting on with her life, while all of her family and friends were dead. _But that's why you're here!_ her mind tried. _Yet, you're laughing, having sex, and being a complete moron! Get it together, Granger!_ her conscience argued back. Remus could sense something was weighing on her mind. He spoke up, shaking her from her dismal thoughts. Slowly, they chatted about many different things – from their favourite spells (Remus's funnily enough was Accio; Hermione smiled and said "Avis!") – to their favourite books, both agreeing that The Lord of The Rings trilogy couldn't be topped.

"Did you know he was a wizard?" Hermione asked, talking about the author of their beloved series.

"No!" Remus peered down at her, "I am in utter disbelief the Ministry allowed that on Muggle shelves."

Hermione grinned, "It was long ago… I couldn't tell you. He basically told the truth of our kind… I don't know," she shook her head.

It was lovely to have such stimulating conversation with her friend and favourite professor. There wasn't any strain of dread between them. They came together like fate; they were _supposed_ to be friends. They had made it back to hers and Sirius's home – the rain played like white noise in the background – Hermione said loudly, "Would you like to come inside? I know Sirius was saying this morning that he wanted to hangout with you tonight. And it's the perfect weather for a cup of tea!"

"Oh! Well, forget Sirius! Tea it is!"

….

Sirius packed light, just as Moody told him to. He took what he needed money wise from the safe hidden behind a portrait in his living room. Once he was ready to go, he sat down and waited. Waited to see her, maybe. Waited to leave. Waited to hear from Moody telling him that the mission was cancelled and he could have the week to himself.

He glanced at the clock and there was still no sign of Hermione walking through the door. He didn't know why he was so concerned with her or her whereabouts. He was beginning to feel silly and slightly mad. But, he was summing it up to the storm outside. Or _maybe, its because she doesn't cling onto you like most witches do,_ his other side rationalised. Even though she was his first time and he hers (which was something special, he truly thought), he'd had his fair amount of snogging, touching, and all things oral with plenty of birds; they'd all beg for more, more, more. _Her,_ though – she'd said no more. Nothing else could happen between them, Nothing should have happened in the first place…. That statement hit him particularly hard.. He didn't think of their night together as a mistake; sure, they didn't really know each other, but it was an everlasting moment for the both of them. Her reticence was aggravating and Sirius felt desperate; he wanted to beg for her to fall after him. Perhaps it was all because of the massive hit to his ego that she didn't want him – that she didn't lustfully bat her lashes toward him. Maybe _that_ was why he was so infatuated with the one called Hermione Granger. And yet, he still longed to see her before he left.

He stood from the couch and stretched. He could feel the weather aching through his bones as if he was much older than he was – but he knew it was much more than his age. It all had to do with rejuvenation and his star sign – Black's were a mess of people. He knew once the rain let up – he'd be stronger. For now though, the rain hadn't stopped, he was tired, and he wasn't looking forward to the mission. The skies were so dark – if it weren't for the time on the clock, it could easily be mistaken for night. Everything about the evening was eerie – the rain, the wind, the shutters flapping against his windows. It wasn't usual for these parts and it was really taking its toll on him and his emotions. In reality, he knew the storm had everything to do with the Dark Lord Voldemort and his army of Death Eaters. That thought caused even more distress to him on Hermione's behalf – she didn't know the dangers of this area, or have anyone to turn to. He shook himself inwardly, trying to focus, but he hoped even more fervently that she'd be back before he left, just to be sure she was okay. He checked the clock once more - he had a little over an hour before he needed to leave. A strike of lightning lit up the sky and another crackle of thunder shook his flat – a trinket on the bookshelf fell, making a soft _thud_ on the floor.

…

Hermione opened the door and stepped in, almost tripping over the cold, wet pile on the floor at her feet. Remus and his reflexes caught her in the nick of time. "Thanks…" she muttered. "What in the world?" She bent down to pick up the dirty clothes and tossed them into the hamper of the small launderette.

Remus made his way into the flat, shrugging his cloak off and placing it on the back of a chair. "Sirius?" he called out.

Hermione rounded the corner, "Is he not here?"

Remus shrugged and knocked on his mate's bedroom door. No answer.

Hermione walked back to the kitchen and found a notecard with perfect penmanship written out to her.

 _Ace,_

 _I waited around until I had to leave. Hope you are safe. I will have my mirror on me, however, I don't know if I'll be able to answer. I have an important mission and I don't know when I'll be back. Until then, stay safe._

 _P.S. I'm still not sorry for what happened between us, though I am sorry I left on such a harsh note this morning. I wish you well._

 _SB_

 _I don't regret it, Sirius. It just wasn't supposed to happen…_ she rubbed her temples, hoping to weaken the headache that was migrating into the centre of her brain.

"Everything okay?" she heard from behind her, nearly making her jump from her skin.

She nodded, "Mmhm. Yes, just a letter from Sirius. He is on a mission. He doesn't know when he will be back," she said, pulling the letter away, not allowing Remus to see what it said.

"Are _you_ okay?" he asked.

She rubbed her fingers over her eyes. "I will be. A lot has happened in the past couple of months and sometimes I forget that I am not where I was… And with Sirius on a mission, it kind of reminds me of where I used to be. Does that makes sense at all?"

The man stepped to the opposite side of the counter, "Hermione, he will be okay. He's a strong guy. He may not look it or even act it, but he's incredibly smart. So, don't stress yourself about him," he said, as if he knew something was going on between she and Sirius.

She looked up, her amber eyes meeting his hazel, and she sighed. "He reminds me of someone I used to know, Remus… and he was everything like you said Sirius is… smart and strong. The problem was, he never listened to the instruction given to him and it got him killed. Thrown _through_... " she stopped. _The veil…_ her throat began to tighten. She covered her mouth with her hand to stifle the sob. It had hurt when he died then, and Hermione still felt the pain now, years later she never imagined it'd be as bad as this. Was it because she was seeing him so young for the first time, carefree and without the memory of his best friend's death weighing him down? She swallowed the cry and shook herself inwardly. _Pull it together, Granger._

Remus came back around to her, placing a comforting hand on her shoulder, "Do you want to talk about it?"

She tilted her head and tried to wipe aside the tears, only to have more fall down, "No. There isn't any use. What's done is done, neither here nor there…he's gone. Sorry for this." She went to stand, but Remus's hand tightened slightly for her to stay.

He furrowed a brow and almost chuckled, "Why would you be sorry? You've obviously gone through something, Hermione. And by the way you've acted tonight and your tears right now, you've got a lot on your mind that you need to talk about."

"I wouldn't want to punish you. Hearing a woman cry has to be the last thing you'd want to do."

He shrugged, "It is. I don't want to hear _or_ see you cry. So…let's talk about it."

She was in awe by this man's character. Hardly even knowing her, he could sniff out her pain and wanted to make it all better - even when he had his own stresses to deal with. It was always he who could spot her weariness when she wasn't aware of it. He never failed in asking if she was okay, he never failed in wanting to heal her heart. And now she knew why - because in the past, her _present_ , they became best friends. She knew she couldn't tell him everything right away. She knew she'd have to make up names and sway the truth just a little bit - but it'd be her first time since Harry and Ron died that she'd be able to talk about it. She was scared. She didn't know how it'd come out, or how it would sound to him… but she would try her best. She owed it to herself to make things better for her soul and her conscience. If she wanted to fix the future, she would need to fix herself and let go of her past. "Do you mind if I change into something comfortable?"

The corner of his mouth turned up. He shook his head, "I'll put on the kettle."

….

His bag over his shoulder and an unopened bottle of Muggle soda in one hand, he walked the unusually quiet corridor to the Auror's office - the only workers at the Ministry were the Unspeakables and some bureaucrats that stayed late for the sake of meeting deadlines, and of course, the occasional ghost. It was weird being here after hours. He opened the door to the office, he was the first of his chosen team to arrive aside from Moody.

"Thought you'd be the one who was late." Alastor said to Sirius.

The raven haired man shook his head, "No, sir. You said be here by seven for what I'm assuming to be a very important mission."

"It is. The others should be here soon." He looked up at the clock. "It's not gonna be pretty, son. But you'll make do." Sirius was sure that was the closest thing to a pep talk he'd ever get from the man. He didn't say anything though and sat down at his desk.

Moments later, Frank Longbottom walked in. He was a big bundle of nerves and one could see his anxiety written all over him from a kilometer away. He didn't say anything to Sirius, but nodded and sat down. Then another Auror walked in, John Dawlish, and lastly, Marlene McKinnon. They all sat in their usual places and waited for their order - no one said anything, where usually by then, someone would have popped a joke to lighten the mood.

Alastor came walking from his office. His brown eyes looked back and forth over his team. "I called the four of you here tonight for a top secret mission. I chose each of you by your skill set. You all have something that the other doesn't - however you work together perfectly." He switched his weight to his left foot. "The storm, as you all probably know is not weather related. It's the Death Eater fucks screwin' round with magic they shouldn't be meddlin' in. We sent out a rep from the Department of Magical Climatology this mornin' and it was quickly concluded that it's dark magick causin' the ruckus outside. The unfortunate situation is we know where they are - and we need to stop 'em."

"Sir - you're sure it's just this set of D.E.'s we need to go after?" Marley asked.

"No. They are using the storm as a decoy. Not sure how many are where, but that is why I have called each of you. Two will go to where the brew is and the other two will go to where we believe they are planning the attack."

"Attack on whom?" Frank said.

"The Weasley family," Moody said with finality.

"The bloody hell? Why didn't you call the Prewetts in?" Dawlish spit.

Alastor turned to him, "Because, stupid, they are movin' Miss Molly, Arthur, and the children to a safer setting."

John had nothing to say except for a quick and quiet, "Oh."

Moody snarled at the man, then turned his attention back to the group as a whole, "Remember, stay on your toes - _constant_ _vigilance_. Understood?"

The four of them answered in unison. The sound of fear was present, but the job had to be done.

"I wish the best of luck to each of ye. I plan on seeing you here when it's done." Moody cleared his throat. "I'll be out there, too. We will all be _here_ when it's finished. Maybe not in one piece, but ye better be breathin'. Don't die - not on my watch."

….


	7. Closer to the Edge

_5 May 1979_

Hermione came to her door to see that it'd been opened. Her hands suddenly began to shake as she reached out to turn the knob. Had Sirius gone inside? Did he find anything? She pressed it open, all air escaping her body. Everything seemed right, but just to be sure, she did a simple investigative spell to see if anything had been moved, touched, or gone through. Everything glowed blue, assuring her that the room had been untouched. Satisfied, she released the charm and placed her wand on the dresser. She shook herself, _maybe I didn't lock it_. She took some deep breaths and went back to doing what she had come to do. Lowering herself to the bottom drawer, she pulled a pair of pyjama bottoms and an old band t-shirt out. She braided her hair back and stood before the mirror telling herself that it would all be okay. She'd allow this one time to get it out - to better herself.

Hermione and Remus sat in the living room. The rain still poured, the thunder continued to rumble, and the smell of the storm drifted in through the open kitchen window. Remus had placed firewood in the hearth and lit it with his wand. A kettle of tea set between them on the small coffee table, the two sat on the floor, barefoot and in comfortable clothes (Remus had nicked a pair of Sirius's flannel bottoms).

"First, I want to make it clear… I don't want you to pity me. I don't want you to feel sorrow or remorse for me. I'll tell you only once and I'd be very grateful if you didn't mention any of it to Sirius." She looked up to see Remus's reaction to it, but only found he was listening. "I understand he may have a good heart, but I don't want him to know, yet," Hermione said, without skipping a beat.

The sandy-haired man nodded, "I promise." And that was all she needed from him. The trust was there, though she knew she still couldn't tell him much more than what she was about to say. Not yet anyway. She took in a deep breath and swallowed a sip of tea. This web of lies was eating away at her, but it has to be done. "Three days ago I lost my brothers. _Well_ , my best friends, really. But, we were all very close, and…"

"Hermione, I understand… you make your own family," Remus said kindly.

Hermione's cheeks reddened. She was always so bad at explaining the simple things, but she nodded and went on. "Well, one died very quickly and the other very _painfully_ ," she continued, envisioning those green, lifeless eyes staring back at her.

The goosebumps rose over Remus's skin as he heard these words. He couldn't imagine that pain, though he didn't say anything, he simply folded his hands into his lap and nodded for her to go on.

"We had been on the run. Voldemort had… pinpointed _Henry_ and he wanted him dead because he felt like Henry would be the death of him. So, Ronald and I decided to go with him into hiding."

Hermione closed her eyes, remembering all the detail as if it were a movie. "We were gone for so long. We would do whatever we could to keep Henry safe. He was our family and we were his…." She told Remus of the escape, the hiding, and how the men had died. " _Valiantly_." She spoke of her family, and their demise - told him of a pair of lovers, new parents, who fought bravely, but died, leaving their sweet child behind, her face like stone as she said each word. She wasn't sure how long she'd talked until a log in the fire tumbled to the floor of the hearth, sparking embers into the air. The man stood and poked at the flames with the fire-poker. He didn't say anything until she sat quietly, staring down at her nail beds.

"Was this the small battle in Paris?" the man asked.

Hermione hadn't realised the dates, but it was in fact, lined up with the fight that lasted all of two hours. She had read about it from an old newspaper clipping in her own time at an Order meeting. Voldemort had sent his followers out to scope out Muggleborn and non-believers to his cause to make a point - the mission ended with bloodshed and death all around; at least one hundred people had died. " _Yes_. Yes, I was there," she lied, but it made sense… it was the only way for her to get around the questions.

"A few people from the Auror office here were called out there…there will be a ceremony for the fallen." Remus closed his eyes, thinking about the article he had read on the front page of the Daily Prophet. "Nasty fight. I'm sorry, Hermione. I am terribly sorry." He bent down to sit beside her. "You're strong."

Hermione looked up at him, her eyes filled to the rim. "How do you know?"

"Because, you're willing to smile… you're willing to laugh, and you're willing to talk about it. It sucks now and it will hurt like hell for a long time, but you will get past this." He took a breath and without pity, thumbed away the tears tracks from her cheeks. "There is a reason why you are alive. You're here now and when the time comes, you will fight. Avenge your family, avenge Henry and Ronald." He picked up his cup of tea and held it out to her, "Death to Voldemort."

Hermione gave a small smile, copying his actions with her own mug: "Death to Voldemort." And that was a promise she intended to keep, a deed she would see done. She would make one hundred percent sure Voldemort would die by her wand.

….

"McKinnon, Black, head to the Weasleys home. The Prewett twins already have them moved. Stay out of site until the time is right. Don't kill unless necessary - got it? I trust your judgment, Black."

Sirius and Marlene nodded to their leader.

"I'll be there as soon as I shut the brew down." Moody stepped over his broom, tilted his chin in luck.

Marlene and Sirius got onto their own brooms, tapped them with their wand, rendering themselves invisible. They rode for about an hour until they reached the small town of Ottery St. Catchpole that held the Weasley Cottage. It was in a wooded area, perfect for attack. Marley and Sirius landed in a tree about twenty metres away from the quaint home. The storm hadn't let up, but they were sheltered from the rain by the leaves. Nothing had begun as far as they could tell. A decoy Molly could be seen inside the kitchen window, standing at the sink. Lights were on in various places of the cottage, making a faux appearance of the family being present. " _Heard you have a girl living with ya,_ " Marlene whispered once they were settled.

Sirius looked slightly taken aback. She literally had only gotten back that day, news travelled fast. " _Oh yeah? Who'd you hear that from?_ " He kept his eyes on the surrounding area.

" _Remus. I seen him today at his new job. Flourish and Blotts_ ," she answered, the envy leaking from her tongue. " _Think it's a good idea? As you're so bad at commitment._ "

He rolled his eyes. This was the shit that pissed him off about Marlene McKinnon. Always putting her bloody nose into places where it didn't belong. Thinking she knew the full story, when in reality, she'd lost her bloody chance with him and she needed to get over it. But he kept his cool. " _I'm not bad at commitment, Marley."_

" _Oh, so you are dating her then_ ," she said spitefully.

"Did I say that?" He spoke a bit louder and angrier than he meant to. He heard a twig snap in the distance and looked to his left to find a fox prancing over a fallen log. Another twig snapped to their right and a faint sound of voices followed.

"No. But _you_ might as well _have_." She pursed her lips. They both reached for their wands; they could hear men speaking, louder as they came closer.

" _Even if I were, why's it your concern?_ " Sirius whispered harshly. They slowly climbed down the tree. Marley had no time to answer just then. Their feet thudded onto the ground. Wet leaves covered over the toes of their boots as they began to weave in and out of trees toward the cottage. They signaled one another, rounding each side of the home separately.

"I'd really like to not kill Molly without a taste of her lovely cunt," a raucous voice said.

"Do you want to do it before we kill 'em? Make Arthur watch?" his partner grunted. They both laughed, not caring if anyone heard them.

It took everything inside of Sirius not to attack for the threat on Molly, but these were the kind of people that were working for Voldemort and were truthfully better off suffering at the Kiss of a dementor. He wanted to strike each of them down, but knew better - not without reason, Moody had said. This is bloody reason enough! He kept his wand tight in his fist. It didn't sit well with him that there were only two of them… it had to have been a -

" _Stupefy_!" he yelled, hitting another Death Eater coming from the shadows of the trees square in the chest. " _Incarcerous_!" Wooden ropes conjured from the roots of the surrounding trees crept up the man's legs and continued to wind their way up his body, as he panicked himself nearly into a seizure before fainting. Across the way, Marlene was dueling another person who had come from nowhere. The two Death Eaters that had been talking before had knocked the door from its hinges, and were already inside; sounds of furniture crashing and dishes breaking came from within. Sirius thanked Merlin that the family had been moved to safety. He ran through the mangled door, but just as his foot hit the threshold, he was brutally pushed against the wall and hit across the face with an elbow. Blood shot from his teeth and his nose, dripping down his chin.

Once her opponent was incarcerated, Marlene ran after Sirius but was too late when he yelled: " _Marley, no!_ "

The two men's faces were covered in intricately detailed silver masks. They held the Aurors tightly against the walls. "Well, well… what do we have here? Thought you could trick us? We are always two steps ahead of you. The Dark Lord is always ahead of you!"

"Funny, because… we are… seven… steps ahead of you." Sirius said, spraying blood over the man's mask, even as his throat was being crushed by his attacker's forearm.

The men began to maniacally cackle. "Oh? Who's gonna save ya? You both will be dead by the time we're through with you! How about we start with a little party trick?" The man holding Sirius waved his wand, " _Incendio_!" Flames immersed around the counter tops. Smoke quickly began to blacken their surroundings and fill their lungs. The wood crackled as the fire tore through it, beginning to fall in small chunks to the floor.

"I like this one!" the man holding Marlene commented. He raised his mask just enough to show his lips. He reached over and stuck out his long pink tongue, licking her from chin to the top of her brow line. "She tastes pretty, too." One hand began to search the length of her body, touching her in private places. "You like that don't ya, honey?" She spat into his face and he began to laugh louder. " _Feisty_!"

"Leave. Her. Alone." Sirius seethed through his teeth, jerking to be free. His face was turning blue from the lack of oxygen from being held against the wall mixed with the fiery air.

"Hmm. No. Better not. Keep him awake, Mulciber. He should see this!" Sirius caught his breath when the arm was pulled away, though his vision was still hazy.

Marlene stood strong though; even through the murky air, Sirius could see she was mortified. The man before her ripped her Auror robes from her heaving chest.

Sirius tried to fight from the Death Eater's grip, but was instead thrown down and stepped on, the force behind the boot crushed his collarbone, breaking it. He summoned the magic he had within his reach, without his wand in his grip. He counted to himself to focus the energy flowing within him, reserving his strength even as pain shot through his chest and every breath of smoky air scalded his lungs. The heat was overwhelming, but he knew this was his only chance, Marley's only chance, to get out of the house turned painfully into Padfoot. Blindsiding the other three, he shot up and pounced onto the man attacking Marlene, ripping the beast's throat with his K-9 teeth. Blood gushed like a fountain as the Death Eater fell to the ground gripping his neck, trying to keep the blood from escaping, but it was too late; his body was engulfed by the flames. Padfoot hunted with the same bloodlust in his eye for the other attacker. Skin hung from his teeth, blood matted the hair around his snout, and it dripped into perfect little droplets at his paws. He growled and snarled at his opponent, barking, begging for him to run, so he could have a better charge.

The Death Eater fearfully pointed his wand at the dog, but before he could even cast, Padfoot pounced, giving him the same treatment as his partner - blood splashed across the wall and the man fell to his knees and face planted into the floor. Only if necessary… The dog stretched his paws before him dropping the bloodied skin from his mouth and transfigured back into his human form. "Hope your son is better than you." Sirius spun around to Marley. She stood wide eyed and bleary at him, hysterical of his appearance.

"I'd really appreciate it if you didn't tell anyone about that little trick you just saw." He said, wiping the blood from his mouth with the back of his hand, careful of his crooked nose. Purple and blue bruising webs traced his eyes.

Marley didn't say anything but confirmed with a quick nod and reached for their discarded wands. Covered in soot and their skin blackening, they raced from the house. Standing mindlessly and numb, they stared at the cottage as it burned down, never noticing the rain had stopped.

Sirius twirled his wand and sewed Marlene's robes.

"Th-thank you, Sirius," she managed.

He woúldn't look her in the eyes, but said, "Yeah." He turned to walk back to where his broom was parked when Moody arrived. The older man jumped off his own broom, yelling, "What the fuck just happened?", holding his arms before him at the burning scene.

Sirius spun on his heel toward his boss and stopped short before his face. He was seething and jabbed a finger directly into the latter man's shoulder. " _The fuck happened?!_ _You_ didn't bother training us properly! _You_ didn't give us the appropriate amount of men to do the job! _You_ threw us in this _fucking_ mess blindly!" Moody stared with his mouth open. Blood dripped around Sirius's gums as he spoke, colouring his teeth pink - some spilled over his lips as he yelled at his leader, splattering onto Moody's cheeks. " _That's_ _what_ _the_ _fuck_ _happened_!" His whole body shook as he pulled his hand away. He gave the man before him one last look over before he stormed away. He kept walking until he got to his ride.

Marley raced up behind him, calling his name all the while. Before he threw his leg over, she touched his broken bones. He jumped, almost striking her with his wand.

"What?" He spit the copper taste to the ground.

She didn't flinch, but stepped closer to touch him on his shoulder once more, not realising the damage. He pulled away before she could.

"Don't," he said.

"Sirius…" she began but was stopped.

"I said _don't_ fucking start, Marlene. I don't want to hear how everything will be all right. I don't want to hear how things will get better. And I don't want to fucking hear what you have to say about a girl living in my goddamn home!" he yelled. He lifted off from the ground, not bothering to say goodbye. She watched as he drifted away in the winds of the night.

He didn't bother going back to the office. He stayed upon his broom and rode over in the warmth of the night to Hogsmeade Village. He surprised himself with the ability to hold on for his weakness was overwhelming. He hadn't been there in ages but he didn't want to go home just now. Escaping his broom, he held it beneath his unbroken arm and walked inside the Three Broomsticks.

" _Last 'round!_ " the woman called as the bell rung above her door. Her normal façade changed when she noticed just who was walking in the door. She rushed over to him, holding his cheeks between her cold hands. "Oh, sweetheart, what happened to you?"

"Ah… nothin' for you to worry with, Rosie." Sirius managed. His voice was a bit nasally from his broken nose. He held his left arm weakly.

"Love, you're all tore apart. Let's get you to a room and cleaned up. Georgie - finish up the night for me, will you?" the barkeep said to her maid.

Rosie, otherwise known as Rosmerta, helped Sirius limp up the stairs and into one of the rooms where he'd spent many a night before. She sat him down on the bed then quickly began to fill a pot with water and boil it with her wand, mindlessly adding ingredients to it. She worked all the little tricks she had grown accustomed to for doctoring up her boys over the years. She handed him a leather band to bite down upon as she whispered, " _Episkey_." His nose straightened back up, but not without another bout of bleeding. Once she finished with that clean up, she looked over the cuts and scrapes of his arms, " _Ferula_ …" bandages covered and stopped the bleeding. Finally, she took the potion she was cooking and filled a goblet up for him to drink. His tongue crinkled at the smell as it hit his nostrils. "Drink it," she said. It was for his collarbone and the break was the worst he had ever endured. The pain had been so bad, that his body went internally numb to it.

He took in a large gulp, forcing himself not to gag as it slithered down his throat. He could feel the tiny shards of bone gathering together, piecing bit by bit to reform his shoulder. He bent over in pain and cried out. " _Makeitstop_!"

Rosmerta placed a loving hand on his back and rubbed calming circles. "Let's have a lie down." She pulled his boots from his feet and placed them beneath the old bed. She could see the stains of blood over his shirt. "I'll go get you a different set of clothes. I'm sure Fergus has somethin' for you to wear," she said, speaking of her husband.

Sirius sat there for a moment, in a daze. His mind was blank, his heart was still beating, and, luckily, his body was still in one piece. Slowly, he undid his pants and shuffled them off then painfully removed his shirt. His knuckles were bruised, his body ached, and he was terribly sick to his stomach. He was sure that he'd lose his job for the way he'd spoken to Moody, and he'd probably lost a friend in Marlene, but oddly, none of that mattered. He stared down at his feet, began to wiggle each toe - he was alive and he'd made it through, so why was he so angry?

Rosmerta entered the room once more and sadly smiled at him. "Here's you some pyjamas and…" she handed him a glass of oak-matured mead. "I'll wash your clothes for you. If you're up to it, a shower might help. If not, I'll get you a dreamless draught."

Sirius turned up the drink and drained it in one gulp. He felt the burn deep in his chest, then out of nowhere he began to cry. Tears fell down his face rapidly. His eyes burned and he felt completely stupid for it. He tried to hide his face from the woman before him and panted out a whispered "Thank you, Rosie."

She patted him on his good shoulder, then kneeled down on her knees before him, taking his face once more between her hands. She wiped away his tears with her thumbs and said, "You're like a son to me, darling. No matter the circumstance, you and your friends are always welcome here. As long as my feet walk this earth, I'll be here for you." His lower lip pouted and shook a bit more at her kindness. "Rest up, love. I'll bring you some breakfast in the morn." She got back to her feet and left him to it. Once the door was shut, he managed to stand up, a bit dizzy, but walked on to the bathroom to wash away the pain.

….

 _6 May 1979_

Hermione awoke at the sound of the clock striking two a.m. She sat up slowly, pressing away the ache on her lower back. The only light was of the dying embers from the fireplace. She noticed a lump lying beside it, letting out soft snores. It was Remus, he was cuddled beneath his cloak. Hermione reached for the blanket that she had not placed upon her and covered the sleeping man instead. She hadn't even remembered when she fell asleep, much less on the couch. She padded softly to her room, not bothering to remove her duvet and laid face down into her pillow, reaching over blindly to turn the lamp off, returning to a deep slumber in a matter of seconds.

Before she knew it, her new Muggle alarm clock was chiming in her ears. She thrust herself up with her arms, unsure what was going on, then realised it was only the clock awaking her. She leant over and smacked the button to shut it off. Wiping away the saliva now drying on her chin, she yawned. The sun shone through the curtains, signalling that the storm had passed along. She reckoned her talk with Remus was helpful and it was a step in the right direction to her rehabilitation. _Remus_. She wondered if he might still be there.

The wood from the fireplace had been cleaned away and Remus was no longer lying before it. He had left for work, she imagined. That was okay though, she knew she'd see him again sometime soon. Other things needed to be done.

She cooked herself up a brunch and tea to settle down in her room and start back to the diaries. She had went through three until she landed on a page that grabbed Hermione's attention. It was labelled with the day, month, and year - which happened to coincide with today's date.

 _I'm scared. I don't think I've ever been so terrified in my life. Mother and I took a family heirloom to Borgin and Burkes today. Apparently my cousin, Regulus will be learning to place a curse upon it… a mission for the Dark Lord. Why it was asked that he do such a thing, I do not understand… Mother said when the time comes, I will be privy to more information. Until then, I must mind my own business. I pray to Merlin that when the time comes that I have my own son, this will all be over. I could never imagine forcing my child to do the things Walburga says Regulus does, sacrificed on the altar of the Dark Lord's wishes. Sirius got out. I envy him._

" _Ha_!" Hermione tutted, "how wrong you are..."

Despite the ugly truth of the situation, Hermione set her tea aside at this breakthrough. The air around her became thick with anticipation. This is it! She'd found her way to meet Sirius's long-lost brother. She could befriend him, show him that what he's doing is wrong and voila! He and Sirius could rebuild their relationship, and move forward to a brighter future. She shut the diary and set it aside, feeling a bit more enthusiastic than she should, ignoring the small voice of truth whispering in her mind, _It won't be that easy_.

Opening her closet door, she flicked through the clothes until she landed on the right dress; she had chosen a couple for this reason alone. She'd be entering into Knockturn Alley to meet the one-and-only Regulus Black.

Properly clothed in the vintage knee length dress with far too many sequins and a corset a smidge too tight, forcing the top of her breasts to sit above the bustline, she buttoned a long, sheer skirt around her waist. Taking her wand, she waved it over her head and watched as the curls plaited into a Dutch braid. She looked like Royalty.

….

 _Knockturn Alley_

Nature was grim in this place. Ivy scattered over the walls, spider webs were in every corner there was a sign, rats dashed across the roads - this was the picture-perfect idea of darkness, dreariness, and evil. Witches stood in revealing dresses. Wizards held their cloaks out with items off the Black Market, begging for money.

Hermione held her wand tightly, close to her body. She remembered the route to the small shop. Stopping right outside the door, she steadied herself to reach out and turn the handle.

The bell jingled as her foot crossed over the threshold; dust tickled her nose. A man stepped around the counter. He had shoulder length curly black hair, eyes the color of a stormy sky, and porcelain pale skin. He wasn't as rugged as his brother, but still handsome all the same. Hermione noticed a silver tag pinned to his lapel and read his name: _Regulus_. His voice, soft as velvet, "Could I be at your service, mum?"

….

 **A/N** : Kit Harrington/R.A.B.

Also, thank you to all of you that have nominated QoY for Shrieking Shacks Awards! It means so much and I am honoured to have such wonderful readers! Also, thank you to **ravenclaswmidwife** as always! She's been kicking butt in nursing school, yet still makes the time for me. Xo. Forever love, Blue.


	8. Everybody's Lookin' For Something

_"Everybody's looking for something. Some of them want to use you. Some of them want to get used by you. Some of them want to abuse you. Some of them want to be abused." - E.B._

….

 _13 May 1979_

"Have you heard from him?" Marlene leaned over the counter at Flourish and Blotts, staring down at the man who kneeled before a large pile of books. She twirled a curl around her finger, innocently trying to find out information. It had been a week since she had seen Sirius last and she was becoming nervous for his absence.

Remus shook his head, "I have not. Perhaps he's with James and Lily. I'll go by their place tonight," he said, wrapping his arms around his work; he knew exactly where his best mate had been and was asked not to say a word of it to Marlene.

" _Well_ , Moody is rather angry and he said if Sirius doesn't show his face in the next day or so, Sirius is out of a job," the woman said plainly. Remus also knew that this was a ploy for him to tell Marlene more. Moody was well aware of Sirius's whereabouts and had told him to take a fortnight, not that the older Auror would go around and telling others' business like that in the first place. And, if Sirius were to lose his job, he'd be just fine - not that many knew, but he had inherited a large sum of money and it was currently just sitting in his vault at Gringotts, hardly touched.

Remus stacked the books up in his arms, hiding his face from the woman. 'I'll look into it, Marley. I'm sure he's camping out somewhere. He wouldn't just go missing - and whatever has put him in this state of not showing up to work and not contacting the people who care about him, obviously means he needs time."

Marley huffed, licking her lips, "You're right. People go missing all the time though, Remus." She then thought better of it, "What about that girl who's living with him, you think she's heard anything?"

The werewolf sighed, "I think she'd have mentioned it to me by now if she had." She had.

Marlene screwed up her face, taken aback by this new piece of information. "You spend time with her?" Her a screamed green.

"Yes… when I am not working or not with whoever else I bide my time with, I spend time with her." Remus was starting to get aggravated, but he also knew Marlene and if he didn't nip it in the bud, she'd go on and on and on, but before he could say anything —

"Hmmph… are she and Si _ri_ -"

Remus held up his hand and shook his head. "Let me stop you right there, Marley. It's not any of your or my business what goes on there."

Her eyes widened. "So you're suggesting…"

"I'm not suggesting anything, Marley," Remus said with strained patience as he walked away, leaving the woman standing there with a pouted lip. She decided talking to Remus was a lost cause and fancied a visit to her old pal's flat to find out about this Mystery Girl.

….

Sirius rolled off the couch, stretching his limbs. The smell of coffee and eggs wafted up his nose. He strolled into the pint-sized kitchen where a fiery-red haired woman was cooking over the stove. Like clockwork, she turned and handed him the plate full of breakfast foods and a full coffee cup to go with it. Sitting at his friend's table, he rubbed his sleepy eyes.

"You know we love your company, Sirius, but don't you think it's time for you to get back to work?" the woman spoke kindly, wiping her hands on the towel hanging from her shoulder.

Sirius scooped a pile of eggs onto his spoon and stuffed his mouth while shrugging.

"Lils, are you suggesting he leaves us?" James asked before kissing his fiancée on the cheek and taking his own plate.

She smiled at her man and shook her head, sitting alongside he and Sirius. "No, that's not it. I just would really like to know what's the matter." Sirius had showed up in the middle of the night three days before giving no explanation as to what was wrong, though he was obviously troubled.

"Maybe he's over the fact that there is a woman in his flat," James teased, nudging his friend with his elbow. "Told ya he can't have a woman as a _flat mate_." He said in sing-song.

Sirius chuckled before taking a gulp of his coffee. "That's definitely _not_ it. Hermione is great." He stared out the window as he said it, before delving back into his dish, not noticing the looks his two friends were giving him.

Lily set her fork down and scooted her plate over. Leaning onto her forearms she said, "Are you here because you got into a row with her?"

James side-eyed Lily, softly shaking his head - he knew his best mate best, and this was not the way to get into Sirius Black's head.

Sirius ran his fingers over his hair and sat back into the chair. With a mocking tone he asked, "Why so curious, Lily?"

Her face turned as red as her hair. "Because I would like an explanation. You've stayed here for three days and have barely spoken five words to James or I. You know we love you and accept that you're here, but it's not fair for us to be housing you when we've no idea why!"

James saw it before it even happened. He leant back in his chair and covered his eyes nonchalantly with his fingers, his thumb pressing into his temple, and holding his other arm as support over his chest, awaiting the damage about to be done.

Sirius threw down the cloth napkin from his lap atop his plate of food, scooted from the chair, and stood. "I'll leave, that way your lives can go back to being fair - or whatever you want to call it." He stormed out of the kitchenette and into the living room, looking around for his boots.

"Now you wait just _one minute, Sirius Black!_ You've no right!" Lily rose, following him; her small feet barely made a sound as she stomped after the raven-haired Marauder.

" _Me_? Have no right? If I'm mistaken, _please_ tell me. But it was _you_ , was it not — that told me whenever I need a moment to get away from life, from work, and from whatever else might be bothering me, I was always welcome here? With no explanation? _Right_? Or am I confusing you with another red-headed miss engaged to my best friend James?"

She rolled her eyes, "Yes, but..."

"No buts about it, mate. That's why I am here. I needed to unwind." He threw his arms in the air, giving up his secret. "A week ago, I was nearly killed, how about that for a reason? Last week _I_ \- I killed two men, if you want to call them that." He glanced down to his toes. " _Killed_ them, Lily. Is that reason enough?" His lips quivered when he saw the fright in the woman's green eyes.

" _You_ …." Her voice was hoarse. She wanted to tell him that she understood that he probably had to do what he needed to, instead she lost all ability to speak. Her heart was thumping through her chest. Her hands ached to reach out and hold her dear friend, but she froze like an acorn in ice.

James came around the corner, patting Lily's back. All of her strength went to her legs and she turned away, running up the stairs.

James looked up at his friend with solemn eyes, "Mate, why didn't you tell us… _tell_ _me_?" James worked in the same field as Sirius, however, James wasn't always on the scene. Nevertheless, he knew the dangers, the inevitable dark moments that came with the job. Sirius had been on a lot more dangerous missions than he had, but they were so few and far between. They worked together on more benign assignments more often than not. He and Sirius were usually used for backup. They had seen things, watched as people died, but had always been told not to move their feet unless necessary. It was obvious to James, that there had been a shift, that Sirius's job differed from his own now.

Sirius sank down to the floor, pulling his weakened knees into chest. The tears fell over when he shook his head. "I thought that if I didn't talk about it… it'd… _it'd go away_ ," he rasped.

James sat down with him and braced his arms over his brother's shoulders. "What did we promise each other when we first got into this job?"

Sirius shrugged, not caring to remember just now.

James exhaled heavily, "That no matter what, we will always have each other's backs. That if I die, you take care of Lily. If you die, I get all your gold." At this, the crying man looked up, with a luster of amusement in his eyes. James squeezed Sirius's frame. "Most of all though, we take care of each other. If you're not ready to talk about it, I get it. I'd just rather you not be a prat to Lily, she loves you and wants you to be comfortable here, that's why she asked. Next time, make something up if you have to."

Sirius sniffed, another tear fell over the slope of his cheek. "I'm sorry, mate."

"It's okay," James nodded, trying to hold back his own tears. "It's okay. Stay with us tonight, we will figure something out to help you get past this. I'll go talk with Lily."

Sirius shook his head, "No. If you don't mind, I'd like to."

….

Hermione had a bite of a bagel in her mouth, a cup of tea in one hand, and a book in the other, all the while sitting on her bed cross-legged, reading over the list of _What_ _Not To Do_ while traveling in time. She nearly choked at the rules, for half the list she had already broken.

Completely immersed in the chapter, she nearly missed the birds pecking at her bedroom window. She set all of her things down, rolled from the bed, and padded barefoot to the window. "Hello, there," she said, dipping her fingers into the treat bowl upon the sill. She untied the letter from the black owl, then unwound the _Daily Prophet_ from the second. "Thank you." She fed them, turning away. Setting the newspaper on the dresser, she opened the envelope with the an elegant scrawl addressed to her.

 _I need to know why. Meet me at St. James Park tomorrow at half past eleven beneath the Ash tree._

 _Best,_

 _R.A.B._

Hermione folded the letter and placed it inside her top drawer. She bit on her lower lip thinking back to meeting with Regulus.

….

 _"Could I be at your service, mum?"_

 _Hermione nodded her head in greeting, "I was only passing by. I'm here on holiday and your store caught my attention." She spoke softly, taking in her surroundings. Though, dusty as it had been when she was there before, it was a lot more organised in this time._

 _Regulus eyed her curiously, but welcomed her all the same. "Is there anything in particular this store could offer to you?"_

 _Hermione felt as she was in an old black and white film, servicing her first meet-cute. "Hmm, perhaps. I'll let you know, though."_

 _The raven-haired man reluctantly stepped away from her and went back to the glass counter where he was working on something, which as far as Hermione could see was a piece of fine jewelry (the opal necklace, maybe?). She edged around the shop, careful not to touch certain items, as they fairly screamed out "cursed object." Her eyes fell upon the black cabinet that Draco had mended during their sixth year at Hogwarts. As she stepped closer to it, she could feel the magick buzzing from it, dark and pulling her in. She knew it was a very popular item in these times. As if her mind went blank, she reached out for it, her fingertips just skimming the wood - "Interested?" Regulus asked, bringing her from her reverie._

 _She pressed her hand against her chest, taking a deep, reluctant breath before speaking. "Erm. What is it exactly?"_

 _"This is a vanishing cabinet. An upcoming rage amongst the D-... Royals. Easy transportation and such." He smoothed his hand over the curve of the top of the cabinet and down the side. He reached for the handle to open when Hermione stopped him._

 _"Actually -" she voiced, taking him slightly aback; he peered into her eyes with his stormy greys._

 _"Yes?" His hand fell away from the handle, his hands taking place behind his back._

 _"I was curious if you had a locket… the thought only came to me just now." She tilted her chin toward the glass cabinets that held different pieces of jewelry._

 _Regulus's stance changed, his shoulders broadened, and he stood a bit taller. He curled his mouth in a satisfying way when he asked, "What type of locket?"_

 _Hermione had to remember that this wasn't Sirius. He wouldn't be as easy to talk to, but his eyes were so hypnotic that she was sure if she didn't keep her wits about her, she'd fall right into an abyss. "Well, it was my great, great aunt's necklace, and I was told that it was tossed away into an old buy, sale, trade market. Seeing as this store is such..." Hermione said quickly, her heart raced, her tongue felt heavy, and her entire chest felt like if she moved in the slightest, she'd topple over._

 _He stared at her as in deep thought before his lips turned up into a smile and said, "Right this way."_

 _She followed him over to the counter, rounding it to pull a tray of the lockets, chains, and other fine necklaces he had. "Any of these look familiar?"_

 _Hermione pretended to look over them, as she knew that the locket wouldn't be there. She touched one that had the similarities to Salazar's locket, but quickly set it back to the velvet setting. "No, sadly. None of these fit." Her eyes wandered down the length of the counter falling on a particular piece that he had been working on confirming her suspicions._

 _Regulus followed suit with his own, "Unfortunately, that isn't available for sale. Do you have a photograph, perhaps?"_

 _Hermione looked back at him, "what?"_

 _"A photograph, to compare lockets." He was skeptical about her, though he wouldn't say._

 _"Oh. Y-yes. I do." The necklace sitting just a few meters away from her was the opal necklace that Draco had cursed in order to kill Dumbledore but instead had been touched by a fellow Gryffindor, Katie Bell; cursing, torturing, and nearly killing her. She reached into her handbag and pulled out a drawing of the piece she was looking for. "This," she unfolded the parchment carefully. "See, it was gold with an emerald S, just there..." she watched as his face fell when he took in the recognition of this particular necklace._

 _Regulus tore the drawing away and leaned dramatically over the counter into Hermione's face. "What do you know about this locket?" he whispered, his tone harsh._

 _She felt all the air leave her body, "I… I'm not sure what you mean?"_

 _"Who are you and why do you want this locket?" His kind demeanor went straight to forced anger. His eyes were staring straight through her and his hands pressed into the counter with such strength that sweat glistened beneath his fingers, causing the glass to fog._

 _The world around her went cold. Tiny speckles of dust fell around them in slow motion contrasting against the peek of light coming through the dimmed windows. If one was to look close enough, the breath from their lips could be seen. They held each other's gazes. The sound of a critter's tail hit the wall as it raced inside a creviced hole. She could tell him - she could tell him everything - the place he'd die… how he'd die… and why. "I just don't want to it to fall into the wrong hands." She broke the ice, her body heating up again, her cheeks red and her body shook beneath her dress._

 _Regulus squinted toward her, removed his hands from the counter and spoke softly once again, "Leave your address. I will send for you if I…" he rubbed his bottom lip with his thumb and blinked. "Come across it."_

Regulus was so kind aside from his momentary lapse of judgement. Hermione couldn't for the life of her understand how he could be working for Voldemort. She knew in the end, he had tried to fight for the right side, but it was much too late for that; she hoped she could save him or at the very least help Sirius see the truth.

….

Nighttime fell. Hermione wasn't expecting Remus to come by, nor did she know when Sirius would arrive, so she settled into the evening as she had for the last week. She lit candles around the living room, opened the kitchen window letting the cool of the night to enter. She started a fire in the hearth and wrapped herself into a cotton weave blanket, and laid before the warmth to read the Daily Prophet.

She was nearing sleep when she heard a light knock on the door. Sitting up slowly, she gathered her wand from beneath the coffee table, glancing at the clock. It was nearing eleven. Half the candles were melted down, some no longer burning and the fire was out, only bits of wood simmered beneath the ash. Another knock - it couldn't have been Sirius, as he set up the charm over the lock in the first place; even if he had lost his key, there was a way to enter. Crawling to the few candles still burning upon the table, she blew them out, taking the soft orange glow to complete darkness. She dropped her blanket and balanced on the tips of her toes and shadowed herself against the wall. Hermione reached the French blinds and peeked behind the last panel to see who the intruder was; a woman about her age with long curly hair, pale against the moonlight. She was slender and tall, and stood with her arms crossed over her chest. The woman didn't seem familiar, perhaps it was one whom Sirius had apparently tossed to the side; she looked the part well enough. Hermione stepped back from the blind and slid down the wall. _Maybe she will just go away._ Which is, presumably, what happened as Hermione awoke the next morning with Sirius kneeling before her, softly caressing her cheek with his finger. " _Ace_ \- _Ace_?"

Her eyes glassy and blurry, she began to wake up. "Sirius?" She looked left, then right, trying to comprehend where she was and achingly sat up away from the wall.

"Yeah, it's me. What happened? Why are you on the floor?" He leant back to the heels of his boots, surveying the waking witch as she wiped sleep from the corner of her eyes.

" _Um_." She pressed her hand on her lower back to massage the ache from it. "Well, a woman showed up late last night, I assume one of your predecessors."

Sirius snorted, "A predecessor, huh?" His smile was too much for her this morning.

She narrowed her eyes at him, "Would you rather me call her a more crude name?"

He continued to laugh and held his hand out for her. She took it obligingly to get away from that blasted wall. "I don't think calling them your predecessors is all that much better, to tell you the truth there, Ace." He winked, "You're making me feel like a cheap whore."

Hermione stood away from him, rolled her eyes, then could not help but laugh. It was the sweetest sound he'd heard in over a week. Sirius hoped that she was past everything that happened between them. Maybe they'd become friends now. It was a long week away and truth be told, he'd missed her. But it was good for them… to get over the initial interactions between them.

"I don't know who it was. I didn't answer. She was blonde, tall, wore a leather jacket." Hermione said, picking the blanket from the floor, folding it. "Pretty."

Sirius sat down on the couch, throwing his feet up onto the coffee table. "Sounds like Marlene."

 _Marlene… McKinnon?_ Hermione set the folded blanket down. She didn't know how long she, herself would be in the past, but she knew that Marlene wouldn't be able to be saved as her whereabouts were unknown when she died alongside her family. And as unfortunate as it may be, Hermione knew not everyone could be saved. "Are you not friends with her?" Hermione asked, as she strolled into the kitchen to start a pot of coffee, only realising now the sun hadn't even risen yet.

Sirius stood from the couch and entered the kitchen behind her. He was cautious. He didn't want to upset the woman, he didn't want to bring up what had happened between them, but he also wanted to be sure they were going to be okay. She seemed fine, she didn't seem distressed to be near him. However, she was very hot and cold and he didn't know which switch he'd be meeting.

She felt his closeness beside her before she seen him. She didn't want things to be kept in disarray with the man, but she also wanted to keep him at arm's length. He was really good at making her feel weak-kneed and pretty; that's not what she was there for. He leant against the counter top, brushing her arm with his own. She had missed him; just as she always had in her own time when he wasn't around. Something about his presence was comforting and nice; she just didn't want him to get the wrong idea of what she wanted from him. She knew she had to get past their little rendezvous if she was going to fix things in this time. She'd made amends with herself for it and decided that what's done is done, and it was time to move on.

"I wouldn't say we are _friends_ … we are colleagues who have a history." He watched the way her shoulders tightened at his words. He raised his brows curiously. "Why do you ask?"

Side-glancing toward him, she could see the way he was looking at her. His hair fell around his face, touching his folded hands. "I was only wondering," she spoke softly. "I wouldn't imagine people who aren't friends show up at one's home nearing midnight."

Sirius sighed, then reached into the cabinets for two coffee cups. "Marlene feels we have unfinished business."

Taking the cups from him, she asked, "Well, do you?"

Inside the drawer beside Hermione, he pulled a spoon from it. "I don't think so."

"So you _do_." Hermione answered, pushing the drawer back in with her hip.

She opened the jar of sugar, as he poured the steaming black liquid into their mugs. Hermione summoned the glass bottle of milk from the refrigerator. They worked together like two puzzle pieces, fitting perfectly into one another's lives, without even realising it.

"I wouldn't say that, Ace. She just can't let go of the past." He enjoyed the first sip of the hot liquid as it slithered down his throat.

"Then what say you, Black?" Hermione asked, bringing her own cup to her perfectly pink lips.

Sirius watched Hermione, and she him, for a minute before he spoke. He didn't want to sound like a dick, when in reality what happened between he and Marley wasn't his fault, but he knew how women had some sort of silent pact to always have each other's backs. He just hoped she wouldn't berate him too hard. "Marlene is a beautiful disaster, a terrible liar, and entirely incredible all wrapped up in one."

Hermione had never imagined a sentence to begin with such audacity, nevertheless, it reeled her in and she wanted to know more. She nodded for him to go on.

Not really first morning conversation, he thought. But it was giving him the enjoyment of Hermione's presence. "It started back in school, we were always forced together as partners, or when one of us needed a date, somehow it was _Sirius and Marlene_." He shook his head, "After a while, it wasn't just out of necessary need for partnership. We became closer, enjoyed each other's company; I loved her. But it wasn't me being in love with her, you know?"

Hermione leant to the counter resting her cheek within her palm, her other fingers rounded the lip of her cup. "I understand. Puppy love."

Sirius scratched his head and laughed, "Heh! Yeah, _puppy_ love. She wanted more from me and I couldn't give it to her, so on the night of Valentine's Day, she slept with a guy a year older than us and we broke up."

"That's terrible!" Hermione said, her dislike for the woman rose.

He shook his head. "The thing is, I had gotten over it after some time. Then it was like she resented herself for it, so she started asking to spend time together again and wanted us to work out and I couldn't do it: the trust wasn't there anymore. For the sake of our group of friends at school, I tried to stay friends with her, but it wasn't enough for her. She kept wanting more and I couldn't give it." He sipped his drink, then set the cup back down gently, "We hadn't talked all summer after school had ended, and I was fine by it. I had my own life and was getting ready for Auror training. I had literally forgotten about Marlene. I began to spend time with other girls, and have fun with them. Then when training started, a woman walked in, late, mind you and it was fucking Marley."

Hermione choked, "Seriously?"

He nodded, "Yes. After our first day, I was pretty knackered so I had stayed behind, took a shower, and as I was leaving, she came up to me and asked if we could talk. James had already left, so I had no excuse. I listened to what she had to say - she was sorry, she wouldn't be a burden, and that all she really wanted was a friendship; she missed me. So I said, okay." He laughed and shook his head at the stupidity of the story, "We started spending time together once more. She was fine, nothing was wrong; honest to Merlin, I was cool with her, I wanted to hangout with her… then we started to talk in a romantic type of way. I had forgiven her for Montague… we were out of school, she was beautiful, and I was happy with the idea of us… I was planning on asking her to be my girlfriend again, then all of a sudden, she changed; I haven't a clue what happened in her brain, but it was maddening. It was like she expected me to write to her every single day when she was gone, or if she didn't hear from me in a couple of days, she'd write to Peter, Remus, James, and Lily, looking for me."

" _Wow_." Hermione had never envisioned Marlene McKinnon to be such a piece of work. Good things were always spoken of her; then again, who aside from Voldemort spoke ill of the dead?

Sirius nodded in agreement, "Yep. So I stopped romanticizing the idea of us and to keep the peace, I said we should stay friends. She _agreed_ ," he held up air quotations, "she told me I made her crazy, but staying friends would do and we were fine. We had been for almost a year now. My fault is, I told her I'd write to her before her last trip and then I had forgotten because I got busy with work and _then_ …"

"Then?" Hermione tilted her head to catch Sirius's eyes. She was amused but also felt really, really bad for him and his fascinating situation.

He felt his cheeks warm up and he couldn't help but turn away from Hermione. He held his cup between both of his hands, "I met you," he said, hazarding a glance at her.

Hermione stepped back, her mouth curling into a grin, "Are you using me as an excuse, Black?"

He softened his stare, turned back to his cup, chin down and smiled, "I could be."

….

 **A/N:** Hello everyone! Long time no see! Here's your newest chapter. I do hope so much you enjoy this. I know there are a lot of unanswered questions, but they'll be answered in due time! Also, send lots of love to my beta, ravenclawmidwife. She's kicking ass in nursing school still finds time to help me out. Xo


	9. From all the truth that I've said

_The sun shone through the sheer eggshell-coloured curtains. Sirius only knew they were that specific colour as he was there the day Lily had bought them. She went into a fit on which white curtains would be more romantic for her bedroom… he smiled at the memory and continued on to pushing the door open to James and Lily's room. The breeze flitted the curtains out, swaying in a perfectly curvy ripple, shadowing onto the floor. Lily sat at the edge of her bed, back turned to the door, her feet were also in the line of sunlight, warming her toes. She sniffled and occasionally held a hand up to wipe away the tears from beneath her eyes, Sirius assumed._

 _"Lil…" he said, so quietly that his voice nearly cracked. Her frame froze when she heard him._

 _She didn't turn directly to him, but the outline of her face flowed sideways. "Yes?" Her voice faltered just a bit, it was enough to confirm Sirius's suspicions of her crying._

 _"May I come in? I'd like to… talk."_

 _She didn't answer aloud, but nodded and turned back to looking down at the shadow now casting over her feet from the window sill. Sirius edged into the room and rounded the bed to her side. She could feel his weight shifting the mattress beneath her as he sat down beside her. He reached over and grabbed her limp hand and took it into his own, bringing their hands into his lap; he felt her squeeze just a little around his fingers. They could hear people in the distance going about their days, laughter of children at play, and the occasional Muggle vehicle going by. They sat in silence for a while, just tracing their own thoughts, twisting through the maze of words of what to say to one another. But it all needed to start with an apology._

 _"I'm sorry," he said, breaking the silence. He could feel her small hand go clammy in his — but in truth, it was probably his own fault. "I should have told you…"_

 _For the first time in those moments they were together, Lily looked at him. The tip of her nose was red, a wee bit swollen, and her eyes were puffy. It could be heard in her tone, all nasally, when she said, "no, Sirius. You didn't have to tell me. I understand… well I mean, I don't understand THAT, but I understand you had your reasons. I shouldn't have pushed so hard."_

 _He exhaled a deep breath and shook his head. "I tell you and James everything. Yes… mostly James everything but, knowing him, he tells you everything I tell him."_

 _The corners of Lily's lips turned up only in the slightest and nodded. "Don't think he tells me every detail of everything though."_

 _He snorted. "I don't." He squeezed her hand, then let go. He rubbed his palms down the front of his pants, then down his face. "I have got the worst headache I think I've ever had and I've had some wicked hangovers."_

 _"I can only imagine." She rubbed her hand over the length of his back. "I can whip up a draught, but it'd be about an hour or so."_

 _He nodded in affirmation, "Thanks. That'd be a treat."_

 _She stared at him for a moment, considering everything she wanted to say to him, but set aside most of the words. The best she could come up with: "I don't judge you, you know? I wouldn't. I honestly believe wholeheartedly you had to do what you had to when everything happened, Sirius."_

 _He rubbed his nose and shook his head. "It could have happened differently…." he closed his eyes and thought back to the flames gobbling up the bodies. The faint taste of copper touching the back of his tongue._

 _Lily could see the tension in her friend's jaw. She removed her hand from his back, scooted around him and went to her knees kneeling before him, taking his face into both of her palms. "Sirius… Sirius, listen to me," she said sternly, until he'd open his eyes and look at her. "You are not a bad person for this, you understand? You have done nothing wrong, love. You did what you had to do. In order to survive, you do what you have to."_

 _Tears weaseled their exit from his eyes. His lips quivered and his nose began to run. He leaned forward and rested his forehead on Lily's shoulder and cried. She reached around him and hugged him harder than she ever had and whispered, "It'll be alright in the end."_

 _When he finally seemed to calm, Lily stood from her position and held her hand out to him to bring him to his feet. They hugged one last time. She looked up at him. "So, when do we get to meet Hermione?" she asked with a bright smile._

 _He shook his head, "You do know that she's not my girlfriend… or really anything for that matter? Right?" He laughed._

 _"Yes… but that doesn't mean that she won't ever be. With a charming smile like yours, Sirius Black, I doubt she will be able to withstand you for long," she winked. "I want to meet her soon. How about you bring her over for supper this week?! I'll make a roast and —"_

 _Sirius chuckled, "She's a life, Lil. But for you, I'll ask her then Owl you her answer. But she will probably be busy. Honestly, I don't think she likes me much just now."_

 _Lily smiled, "I very much doubt that, Sirius. There's not many people that don't like you."_

 _"I could name a few."_

Sirius glanced over at the woman standing in the kitchen. She was busying herself with — _well_ , he wasn't really sure what it was she was doing, but it was letting out an unusual smell, sort of like burning. Grabbing her toasted food, she turned to find that Sirius was staring at her bewildered. Before he could look away, she stopped mid-step. "Yes?"

"Ah…" he twisted his lips in embarrassment, "heh, sorry. I am only curious, what is that you're doing?"

She furrowed her brows in curiosity at what he was asking. He pointed past her to the silver contraption on the counter. She looked over her shoulder and seen that it was the toaster. "Oh? That's a toaster." She held up her browned bread, "It cooks bread, or bagels, heats up a bannock, well, any type of wheat product really. Or my personal favourite... it's more of an American Muggle treat, but they are a guilty pleasure… _Toaster Strudels_. Pastry, filled with a jam and cream," she rambled, then looked up to see Sirius was smiling widely at her. She blushed. "Er, sorry."

He chuckled, "Don't be sorry, silly. I'd like to try them sometime. Speaking of food though, would you like to meet some of my friends? Well, you kind of met them, over my mirror… but in person... not Remus, you met him... know him, I mean. James and Lily though. They asked after you… to see if you'd like to come over to supper with me… at their house… to eat." It was he who now was rambling and blushing like a school boy. "Food." Then cleared his throat and decided the toes of his boots were very interesting.

Hermione bit in her lower lip, contemplating the suggestion and trying to hold in her laughter. "You don't think… it'd be, I don't know… _weird_?"

Sirius's mind went straight to her former regret then thought better of it and shrugged. "No? Why would it be?"

"… Well," she could think of a million reasons as to why it was weird, but all that couldn't really be gotten into. She shook her head, "Never mind. I'd love to. When did they have in mind?"

"They said it was up to you," he said, hopeful.

She could see that hopefulness and couldn't say no, even if she wanted to. "All right. I have a meeting today with someone… but perhaps tomorrow?"

"Okay. I'll let James know." He turned to go owl his friend, then stopped short. The way she said that was odd. "What kind of meeting do you have?"

Hermione swallowed her crumbling slice with a choke, then shakily set the half eaten toast down. "Oh… None for you to worry with. Just stuff with my _grandf_ … _Hector's_ profits and vaults. Stuff that I really don't understand, if I am honest," she laughed lightly.

Sirius wasn't really buying it. He could sense something about her excuse was off. He didn't say anything and skimmed over her unease deftly without her notice. "Okay. Do you want me to tag along for some company?"

Hermione shook her head, "N-no. It'd be boring. A lot of talk that not even I will understand. Thank you though, Sirius," she said, stepping toward him, squeezing his arm thoughtfully.

He observed as she walked away, noticing the stiffness in her once calm demeanor. She was hiding something and he was ready to find out what. Just as he met the desk that held the stationary, an owl tapped the window. It was one he'd never seen before. He opened the sill and the white owl wobbled in with a rather large parcel strapped to its back. Without even waiting for a treat, it flew away once Sirius took the mail from it.

 ** _Sirius Black_** \- it read in a neat scrawl. He turned it over and opened it with his index finger.

 _From the Desk of Dedalus Diggle_

 _Dear Mister Black,_

 _Within this envelope, you'll find everything that I have found on Miss Hermione Granger. I have not found out much in the week I have been trailing her, however, I have come across only a handful of interesting things —_

Hermione stepped from her room, dressed in a completely different attire than before. She exuded royalty. Sirius swore off anything _Royale_ , and she… she wasn't that. She was anything but that. Hermione was the epitome of beauty; her name, her face…. She reached behind her to fix the heel of her shoe, as she did, she reached out her arm to hold herself by the wall. The dress was black, and floor length; long sleeved and covered in lace. Her hair fell just above her shoulders and her lips were a bold red. He had forgotten all about the letters that resided within his hands or the momentary feelings of distrust.

"You, look… _incredible_ , Hermione," Sirius said aloud, though by accident. He went to bite his tongue for it, but was instead captivated by the sudden blush rising upon her cheeks. The use of her name pulled her from her task and made her lose all balance and fall.

He dropped the mail and ran over to her, "We have got to stop meeting like this!" he said, holding out his hand.

She laughed and reached back for his help. "You have got to stop giving me the one way ticket then!"

He winked. "You alright?" he asked.

"Y-yes. I'm fine." _Now_ , she thought, then quickly released it from her brain.

They stood close to one another. Not like earlier in the kitchen, but closer, like before. Neither of them moved. They studied each other's eyes. Her eyes had a golden ring around the brown centre with tiny flecks of green here and there. His eyes, grey and blue, like a stormy night over a turbulent sea. Her hand was still in his, until the clock struck eleven and she pulled away.

She pulled away so fast and held her hand limp against her chest as if it had been struck, "Sorry. I didn't mean to."

He shook his head, "Don't worry about it, Ace."

Then all was right once more.

She slightly smiled. "I've got to get going, I'm going to be late. I _am_ late," she realized, holding up a hand toward the clock and sighing. "I'll see you later." She gathered her skirts and walked to the door. She turned one last time and waved.

Sirius jogged over to the door moments after she left, watching Hermione as she walked up the lane to the apparition point when a funny little idea came to mind. Follow. Then like a light brightening above his head, he remembered the letter and sheaf of papers from the P.W.I. He quickly raced over, bundled them all back into the parchment sack, then threw it into his bedroom and locked the door. Running back to the door, Hermione was out of sight. He stepped onto the patio and switched himself into Padfoot, zipped down the stairs and followed the scent of the woman he was so adamant to spy on. He finally caught up to her when he found that she wasn't heading for the apparition point at all. They walked and walked and walked some more to the point Sirius knew his hands and feet will probably be scuffed up later from the heat of the cement. It was a bit of time until they stopped at a park. _St. James Park_ to be exact. A place where he and his estranged little brother used to come when they were small lads with nothing to do during their summer holidays from school. Sirius watched as Hermione headed for the Ash Tree he was so very familiar with. She then stood, staring out at the extravagant pond. _What are you doing, Ace?_ he wondered. He was tempted to see if he could entice her into petting him, but that temptation dissolved when he saw who slithered out from the shadows to meet her.

….

Regulus pulled the silver pocket watch from his trousers. It was ten minutes until he was to meet the woman he had met days ago in Borgin and Burke's. Her name was that of a Goddess and her tongue forked with sins. He clasped the watch shut, placed it back into his pocket and waited, keeping his eye keen. He waited in the alleyway next to a old Muggle chapel and watched as the geese glided over the green water and bathed themselves under the spraying fountain. As if from nowhere, he watched Hermione step onto the grass and make her way over to the tree where he'd told her to meet him. She looked around, then slid her attention to the pond, giving him the impression that she was alone and he could approach. He checked both ways before crossing the street, stepped onto the greenery, silently moving to where she stood. She seemed restless as she leant her shoulder against the tree. He frightened her when he said, "It's beautiful, isn't it?"

She turned to him, a hand raised to calm her galloping heart. "Yes. Quite lovely." She bowed her head as she remembered Narcissa doing. If she wanted to look the part, she had to adopt many attributes of the royal she knew.

He smirked crookedly, "So Miss Granger —"

Hermione reached her hand to take his, "Please, I'd prefer you to call me Hermione."

He nodded, but didn't smile, "Likewise. Hermione, shall we walk?" His question was more of a demand, as he held a hand before him toward the path.

As if contemplating this decision, she breathed in and said, "Yes."

He held out his arm to escort her. She wrapped hers through his and they began to follow the trail. They walked for awhile, not saying much aside from the short, " _Weather's nice._ " Or, " _Lovely flowers_."

Halfway around the pond, Regulus unhooked his arm from Hermione's. He turned to face her, "We should be alone now," he said, looking around in a silent appraisal of their surroundings. "What do you know about your great, great aunt's locket?" Hermione could hear the adversity in his tone.

"Why? What does my knowing of it have to do with you?" she asked.

"I think you know why and I have to be sure of it," he said plainly.

Hermione shook her head, "I am quite _sure_ Ihave no idea what you're talking about." She went to turn away but was instead stopped by his hand on her arm. She looked back to him in an appalling sort of way. "Might I suggest you remove your hand from my person?"

"Miss Granger, I hate to be so informal. But you know something about Salazar's locket. What do you want with it?"

Hermione stepped back from him. "It was my… _my_ aunt's."

" _Lies_. It wasn't. Because since you stepped into my shop, I looked into you, Miss Granger. You have no sort of connection to the Gaunts or the Riddles. Correct me if I am wrong." His voice was slightly icy. His pupils rounded into tiny slits— almost reminding her of Voldemort's eyes when he'd peered down at her as she'd laid in the gravel staring up at him. She felt her body go cold. He bowed his head in an arrogant way, awaiting for her answer. Instead, he was met with her fear-filled, golden eyes. He cleared his throat and tried to play causal. "So I will ask you once more, what do you want with Salazar's locket?"

Hermione straightened her frame and crossed her arms. "How do I know I can trust you?"

"We can swear on it."

Hermione twisted her face, "You mean by the Unbreakable Vow?"

"Quite." He nodded once.

Hermione looked to her right at the pond. Her head began to spin, was this supposed to happen? _Of course. You are here to change the past._ "Okay, Mr Black. I will tell you as long as we make the Vow. But I can't make any promises that you will like what I have to say."

"I wasn't expecting to. What I do expect is the truth. In the Vow, I ask you to promise to tell me the truth."

Hermione's heart beat so fast that she felt like she would be sick. Her hands and feet were numb and sweaty and clammy — this would be the first time that she would be telling anyone… it was going to be this man. This man who was a good man in the end. He was a good man, _always_. "Okay." She managed to say. "Okay. I promise."

Regulus retrieved his wand from the pocket within his robes. Hermione and he took one another's forearms into a grasp, a thin lick of flame swirled around their arms like a red-hot wire, "Hermione Granger, do you swear to honour your promise in telling me everything you know about the locket?"

"Yes." Her eyes narrowed in on his as another flick of the flame wrapped over her limb.

"And do you swear to tell me the truth of who you are?"

"This wasn't a part of the agreement, Regulus." The witch flinched, trying to pull her arm away, but finding it was stuck in his firm grip.

He raised his brow, "Agree to the terms, Miss Granger."

Her nostrils flared with anger, "Fine, but with one of my own conditions."

It was his turn to narrow his eyes, "Okay. Go ahead…."

"You swear to never tell a soul what you hear today."

He nodded, "I swear."

Satisfied, "I swear I'll tell you the whole truth."

The flame bound itself around their arms one last time then like a fiery rope, tied itself, and dispersed.

….

Hermione felt eyes on her aside from her piercing ones in front of her, but from where she couldn't tell. "Shall we go somewhere else?" she asked.

"Why not here? No one comes here," he said.

"Because, behind you nestled in a bush is a dog." Regulus went to turn, but Hermione quickly stopped him, "Don't look. It's an animagus," she said, keeping her voice low.

"How do you know?" Regulus asked, bemused.

"Trust me. I know a lot more than you bargained for."

...

 **A/N** : Hello! I am sorry it's taken me so long to update. I started back at work and then my beta had a lot of tests, so we've been running a little behind! But fear not, I haven't forgotten about the story. Still have so much going on. I know a lot of questions are coming at me thru reviews and PM's — I hope that all questions will be answered accordingly as the story goes on. I was also asked about my tumblr. I am under Avisblue1765 ... I don't get on there often, but I can try to do better! Anyway, hope you loved this chapter! Much love to ravenclawmidwife, she's awesome! Thank you & please review! Xox, blue.


	10. To Buy the Truth and Sell a Lie

Sirius whimpered in frustration as he dug his claws deep into the earth. He couldn't hear them, they were too far off. If he were to move any closer he'd give himself away, he thought, before he was being batted at. " _Get! You mangy mutt! Away wi' ya!"_ A park manager came swatting at him with a broom.

He managed one last glance at Hermione and Regulus; they were too occupied with one another (which only added to his anger), paying no mind to his banishment. He pushed himself away from the Muggle broom, backwards, tucking his tail, and lowering his ears before he could turn fully to run. He ran to the alleyway his brother had appeared from earlier before changing back into his human form. Disheveled, Sirius retrieved a pack of cigarettes from his back pocket and lit up. Leaning against the bricked wall with one foot steadying him on the ground, he rested his free hand on his bent knee. " _Fuck_." He muttered. " _Fuck!"_

He spit the bitter taste from his mouth, then licked his lips to rid the sudden chap. Rubbing his chin roughly, he closed his eyes and tried to reason with the situation. He remembered the vague scent of a Black on her— but it wasn't his brother. Regulus had a distinctive scent to him _. It. Doesn't. Make. Sense._ Trying to dissect his brain for all imginable possibilities, he found himself rapidly approaching a dead end. Looking over toward the park one last time, he watched as Hermione and Reg had faded away. He puffed his cigarette til it burnt down to the ash and flicked it into a murky puddle just feet from him. He adjusted his jacket and stepped back into the sunshine to go home.

….

Hermione and Regulus settled down deep inside an old library. The smell of parchment and leather was captivating, invigorating, inviting, and calmed her nerves all at once. It wasn't a Muggle library, and one she'd never been to before either. There were spiraling staircases, and chandeliers lit up with black candles. Tapestries of suns and moons covered the walls. Hermione was aching to explore the lavish bookshelves, but her thoughts were soon interrupted when her companion began to speak.

"How did you know that the black dog back there was an animagus and who was it?" Regulus asked, his eyes looked over Hermione skeptically.

"I don't need to tell you who it was… that wasn't a part of the deal. _And_ , because I've seen that particular person change into their form many times." The witch answered without skipping a beat.

Regulus scoffed, "Fine." He leant forward, resting his arms on the table. "Tell me who you are, Hermione Granger."

 _Straight to the point._ This was it. The secret she had been harboring for what felt like decades. The tears were building up behind her eyes, and a weight settled itself upon her chest. _None of that._ Wiping her hands down the front of her dress skirt, she nodded to quash her anxiety and remind herself that it would be okay. _Regulus made a vow, too._ He'd be in just as much shit as she if he broke it.

Fortunately, the man wasn't forcing her. He didn't show any sign of impatience. It was like he could sense her unease with what she was about to say. There was a little stiffness in his shoulders; he was weary. Hermione could see this and she was so afraid of what his reaction would be. How much of this would change the future? Would it be a good change? So many questions danced around her mind. She lifted her hands from her lap and placed them on the wooden table. Fog surrounded her fingertips; they shook a little as she began to speak. "My name is Hermione Jean Granger. I am nineteen years old. I was born September 19 in the year of," she looked up at the blue eyes intently staring back at her. She swallowed, then blinked, "1979."

The man furrowed his brows and turned his head slightly catching a calendar in his peripheral vision: _1979_ it said, reminding him that the year was just that. "That's impossible," he said, so quietly chills ran through her body.

"Is it?" she asked. " _How_?"

He smirked, "How? Time-turners are few and far between, and locked away. There aren't any available to the public… especially to those that aren't of royalty." He tapped his fingers across the wood of the table, "I have, however, heard stories of _my_ family having one — one of the very first ever made. But I've never seen it. I figured my mother was trying to make my family sound more… _appealing."_ He saw the small shift in Hermione's demeanor and narrowed his eyes at her. "But you know more than that." He flicked his tongue over his bottom lip. "We made a vow, Hermione. You promised you'd tell me everything you know."

It was her turn for furrowed brows and astonished smirks. "I promised I'd tell you who I was and what I know about the locket," she responded coldly.

He smiled, his teeth gleamed white against the dimness of the room. "Hermione, let's be honest. You must know who I work for if you came to me about the locket." She looked away. "Right. Then you know what I am capable of."

 _Threats?_ She pursed her lips. "You wouldn't hurt me."

"You say it like you _know_ me. I am more than capable of twisting my wand and placing you under the Imperius curse… I could make you do and say anything I want you to."

Hermione ignored this. "Perhaps I do know you, Regulus Black." She could feel the word-vomit climb up her throat. "How can you be sure I even travelled by Time-Turner? What if I did it some _other_ way?"

"Did you?" he asked, clearly interested in whatever possibility there was. In the end though, he knew whatever it might be, it'd be the truth.

"No."

"Then that settles that. Where did you get the Time-Turner?" he asked, more conversationally.

"How about I tell you everything else first," she spoke quietly. It'd be easier this way for him to understand, just what, when, why, and how this all came to be. "I have no reason to lie. It falls into who I am, why I am here."

"Well, you've no reason to worry, Granger. I made a vow to you that I wouldn't tell a soul." Hearing this reminded her of just that and it made her feel a bit better.

"First of all: it's not impossible. I said the same thing. But the answer given to me was this: the explanation of time-nonsense is too hard to consider getting into just now. I'll start from the beginning, so all I ask is for you to save your questions 'til the end."

"All right," Regulus said. At this, he began to feel nervous, but made every effort not to show it. The way the woman held herself was beginning to frighten him — how much was she about to reveal? Were there any repercussions for her to tell him these things? He was starting to regret his decision, yet they had reached the point of no return. The Vow was made.. He couldn't stand the thought of _what if?_ He nodded reluctantly for her to start.

And so she began. She told him of her start at Hogwarts and how she met _The Boy Who Lived;_ how Harry's parents were killed by Voldemort on Halloween. "James and Lily were betrayed by Peter Pettigrew… and Pettigrew set it up for it all to _fall on…"_

She explained how Sirius was wrongly accused and thrown into Azkaban for twelve years for the murder of his best friends. "No trial." Regulus tried to hide his face, but she could see even by the dim candlelight shadowing across his cheek that he was crying.

She told him of how she freed Sirius by the use of a Time-Turner during her third year…Tears of her own fell as she told him how Sirius had only lived a little less than two years after, until he'd died at the wand of Bellatrix Lestrange, while she and her classmates were under attack by Death Eaters in the Department of Mysteries.

Regulus's knuckles were white as he placed a fist onto the table at this news. " _I'll kill her,"_ he whispered vehemently.

Hermione only shook her head. "That was when I saw Voldemort for the first time: scaly, white, red eyes, like a poisonous snake. He was the literal angel of death."

"Have you seen him here, yet? He's nothing like that. Some would say he's quite handsome." Regulus asked, momentarily breaking her rule of no questions.

"No. I've not seen him. But I will before I leave here. I want to be the one to kill him." At this, Regulus experienced a newfound respect for the woman sitting before him. He continued to listen as she explained how Harry fought his way through his years at school with pain, death, resentment, remorse, regret, and abuse. She told him how she found out who _he_ was while she, Harry, and Ron were on the run. "We had nowhere to go. We landed at Grimmauld Place. Kreacher was there…he was so upset that he'd failed you."

"Failed me?"

"Mmhm. With your death…" she told him of his demise. "He knew of your dealings. He knew what you were doing with with your findings of the locket. He knows now, doesn't he?"

Regulus nodded, "Yes. He knows where my loyalties truly lie. His loyalty lies with me. He'd never betray me."

"He tried not to. But he was forced to. Anyway the locket… the locket is a horcrux; you know this."

"Yes… I had been trying to understand what a horcrux was. I overheard the Dark Lord speaking of them at a Death Meeting. I know my fair share of Dark magick as my family is of a long line of Dark practitioners, though _that_ magick — I couldn't understand it. But once I knew, I've been trying to find a way to destroy the locket before he does what he's wanting to with it."

Hermione nodded. "The locket tried to strangle Harry when he went to retrieve the sword of Gryffindor. Snape had it delivered and dropped in the bottom of a frozen lake. That's the only way I know how to destroy it."

"Of course..." Regulus said, frustrated. " _Snape_?"

She explained Snape, his death, and everything in between. She held herself together to the best of her ability to tell the man the most important part of her journey. _The Battle of Hogwarts._

"We fought our way through at Hogwarts…" her vision glazed over with scenes as if she were there all over again. She could hear the screaming, the pain. She remembered the _I love yous,_ as people were taking their last breaths. She watched as she came across Fred Weasley lying amongst the rubble — blood soaking his shirt, lifelessly gazing at the sky. "We had such high hopes for victory. We all just _knew_ we were going to win… then we didn't. Voldemort's army was stronger— trained longer. They killed so many people. It wasn't about Muggleborns anymore, or whoever had the strongest, purest blood, though for some that _is_ what it was about. In all actuality, it was about this old wizard, bent on vengeance, aiming to kill a kid because of a stupid prophecy." She rubbed her nose and shook her head. She hadn't noticed until then that Regulus had moved his chair closer to her. His body leaned into her as his elbows rested on his knees. Oddly, she didn't mind his closeness; she needed it. "Then, Harry died. Ron died… everyone I knew, everyone that mattered to me was dead. _But me?_ I wasn't dying. I wanted to. I had a few scrapes and bruises, but there was no death and I couldn't, for the _fucking life of me,_ understand why." She wiped the lone tear trickling down her left cheek. "I remember lying there, wishing — praying — to whatever powers might be listening to just let me die. Whatever way I was to go, I didn't want it to be at the hands of _him._ I lost so many people to that monster." _Mum, Dad, Mrs Weasley, Remus… Tonks, Harry, Ron… Lavender— for God's sake I didn't even like her… Charlie, Fred, George… Angelina, Luna, Ginny. Neville, McGonagall…_ Hermione's face was flustered, her eyes were swollen shut as ugly, fat tears fell down her face. _Sirius… "I lost_ _everyone."_

Regulus couldn't believe what he was hearing; but he knew it was true. He could feel it, see it, and with the promise of the Vow — he was at a loss for words. He wanted to apologise, hug her… but now was not the time. This woman probably would strike him for doing so. So instead, he tried to focus her attention elsewhere. "The Time-Turner, how'd you manage that one?"

She looked up abruptly, completely forgetting that was even a matter to be discussed. She sniffled and sighed. "Even with the Unbreakable Vow, I don't think you'd believe me," she said, consciously lowering her eyes from his face.

"Well, looks like I'd have to, doesn't it." He slightly smiled.

She shrugged. "Narcissa Malfoy. Sorry… _Black._ Your cousin."

His eyes widened at this revelation. "Narcissa? I am… _what_? And as a _Malfoy?_ How'd she manage?" He held up his hand and waved it away, "Honestly I don't want to know. I believe you." Hermione wouldn't look at him. She was staring down at the palms of her hands. The tears fell from her face, leaving a wet smudge on her skirt. He wasn't good at this sort of thing — _comforting people._ He took a deep breath then reluctantly and awkwardly placed a hand onto her knee. "I won't let you lose them again," he spoke quietly. "We'll do whatever we can, Hermione."

She finally glanced up at him, "Just promise me you won't go at it alone…." He nodded. That wasn't enough. " _No_. _Regulus_ … listen… Kreacher doesn't count. If we can't figure out a way to destroy the locket — Voldemort will take it to a place that has meaning to him and he will do whatever he can to keep it safe." She didn't want to tell him about the cave as she was afraid that he'd go off on his own to his imminent death .

"You said the sword of Gryffindor worked when you and your friends did it? Wouldn't that do the trick?"

"No, not yet. It hasn't been imbued by the basilisks venom, but it's tucked away at Hogwarts in Dumbledore's office, anyway. There is no way of getting it, not without giving away who I am and where, when, I am from. The timeline is supposed to be changed, but how am I to know it has? I don't know what I am supposed to do — who I am to tell…. There are some people that I won't be able to save, that is just the way of it, Regulus. If many people know who I am, I could be locked away, sent back, anything… it's too much of a risk."

The man nodded. "I agree. Do you know how many horcruxes he made?"

Hermione sighed, "In all, eight. But the last wasn't a thing. It was a _who_. _Harry._ And when he killed Harry, he killed a part of him. When we destroyed the locket, it killed a part of him… but we didn't get to all of the horcruxes. We couldn't reach Bellatrix's vault. We believed that Hufflepuff's cup was placed there, and we also didn't make it to finding Rowena's lost diadem. As far as I know, it's at Hogwarts as well… there was just no way for us to retrieve either of those items."

"We will have to think on Rowena's diadem… are you sure that he used something of that nature?"

"See, Tom wanted to do the impossible. He wanted to live forever. He wanted to kill off anyone that was dirty-blooded. He wanted to rule. So he did what he could to obtain anything that no one else could. When Tom was in school, he sought out the ghost of Helena Ravenclaw, or as you might know her — _The Grey Lady."_

Regulus scratched his head, trying to rack his brain to make sense of all of this. "Go on…."

"After finding out what happened, Tom had travelled to the Albanian forest where Helena's daughter had hidden the diadem. He retrieved it, killed an Albanian peasant — creating what we believe was his fifth horcrux." She paused to study her companion's face. He was holding it together from what she could tell. "From ourthe research, it all started with Tom Riddle's diary; Voldemort had placed a part of his soul into it. Harry unknowingly destroyed that horcrux during our second year with a basilisk's fang in the Chamber of Secrets…." Regulus's face screwed up. "Yes, it's a real legend and Harry actually defeated a basilisk at only twelve years old…but that's beside the point. When we spoke to Dumbledore later, he mentioned that Voldemort's soul had been split so many times that he wouldn't have felt the loss of that piece. His plan just fell together: he went for Slytherin's locket, Helga's cup, Rowena's diadem, but he could never get a hold of Gryffindor's sword — as it would only fall into the hands of a brave soul. He used his father's ring. His pet snake, and then, unknowingly, put one inside of Harry when he killed James and Lily."

"It makes sense. His _arrogance_ …. We need someone on the inside at Hogwarts," Regulus said.

"I know. I feel if we could just speak to Helena, and find out where the diadem is now, we could easily fix that problem. Then, it's just the snake and…"

"He doesn't have the snake."

"Nor does he have Harry," Hermione spoke with pride. "There is still time."

"I think I know who could help us," Regulus said.

Hermione looked up. "I told you, Regulus, no one else can know. I planned on telling Sirius at some point. But now I'm not sure, since I've told you…"

Regulus nodded. "I know. Hear me out though. I think that Snape could help us. He's studying to become a professor at Hogwarts right now."

Hermione turned her head in question. "Under Voldemort's nose? I thought he waited until…".

The wizard sat up in his chair. "No. The Dark Lord thinks that Snape is doing it to help _his_ cause, so he's _allowing_ him to become a professor at the school. But I know the truth of it. Sev is one of my greatest friends; as you and I have done— we made an Unbreakable Vow, so I can't quite tell you the details of it." For the first time in a while, Regulus was beginning to have hope.

"No, but I understand. Snape was a good man. And like you, I know some of his secrets. Let me think on it. I trust your idea, but for my own sanity — I need to be sure I am making the right choice."

….

Sirius finally made it home after walking extra slowly. He didn't want to be in the flat he shared with that betraying, lying piece of _shi—_ "Marley? What are you doing here?" he asked when he looked up to see Marlene sitting on the top step of his place.

"Thought I'd come by to see how you were doing. I haven't heard from you. Thought maybe you offed yourself or something," she said causally. She had her hair pulled into a braid, wearing a pair of short hot pants and a sports bra. Her legs were hit by the sunlight, reflecting her deep tan. Sirius didn't _want_ to look at her in that way, but she was flaunting it as if she were a bag of treats. "Like what you see?"

"No. I'm fine, but I'm really not up for company right now — so sorry you ran all this way just to sit on my top step," he said, walking around her to open his door.

She stood, huffing. "I don't understand what I have done to piss you off so badly, Sirius."

He rolled his eyes and turned around. He could think of a few things but all of her shit couldn't add up to what was going on with him right now. "You haven't. I am tired. Long day."

"It's only a little after three, what could possibly be so taxing?" she pushed.

"Dammit, Marley," he said a little louder than he anticipated. He could see the look of hurt in her eyes.

She stood from the stoop, crossing her arms vulnerably. "I'm sorry. What happened that night bothers me too, you know."

Sirius stopped, then held the door open for her to come inside. She smiled slightly and moved past him. Once he shut the door back, he turned and ran into the blonde throwing her arms around him. He awkwardly held his own at his sides until she squeezed a bit tighter, telling him to hug her. He brought his hands to the skin of her back, feeling her body heat resonate over his fingers. It felt good to have this closeness, but it wasn't with her who he wanted to share it with. She pulled back from him slowly rubbing her cheek against his. "We could forget about it, you know?" Her whisper tickled the lobe of his ear. Usually by now he'd have a hunger stabbing in the pit of his stomach — it wasn't there.

He removed himself from her arms, "I can't, Marley."

Her nose was beginning to turn red, "W..why?" Her voice caught in her throat.

"Because," the man raised a hand and ran it through this hair. "I don't love you anymore, Marley. I don't want to be with you and I don't want to do things with you that would lead you on."

"It _wouldn't—"_

"It would and you know it," he said calmly.

She rubbed her nose, "It's _her,_ isn't it?"

He knitted his brows together, " _Her?_ Hermione?" She nodded, looking away from him.

He let out a low sigh, "It's… _complicated,_ Marley. I… Yes. It's her. I really care about her and right now, I don't even know where she and I stand." He reached out and rubbed the woman's arm. "I care about you, I do, but as a friend. And if you care about me like you say you do, you'd understand and let me go."

"You barely know her, Sirius," Marlene quietly rebutted.

He ran a hand over his face, looking up at the ceiling he chuckled. _Fuck._ "I know."

"I'll leave you to it, then." She walked around Sirius and toward the door.

"Marley?" he said, turning on his toes. Her eyes studied his face. "I really am sorry, love."

She glanced down at her trainers and shook her head, "You know, at one point I would have believed you."

….

Hermione has rubbed her lipstick off by now. Her hair was no longer fixed and she transfigured her heels into a pair of flats. She was coming up to the stairs of her flat when the blonde woman from the night before came trailing down toward her. Hermione didn't even need to question who it was when Marlene stopped right before her and looked her up and down, "You must be Sirius's girlfriend."

Hermione's brows shot into her hairline, " _Girl—_ girlfriend?" She was going to kindly laugh it off until Marlene scoffed. "I beg your pardon, but no, I am _not_ his girlfriend."

"Hmm… well, that man upstairs seems to think otherwise. He can't get his wand out of a knot because of you. He really cares about you and you're leading him along," Marley said cruelly, as she pushed past the confused witch, knocking into her shoulder painfully.

Hermione turned to Marlene, completely put-out; she was too flabbergasted to say anything back. She watched as the other woman bounced away. Hermione started up the stairs to the flat and opened the door. The lights were off, but she could hear the faint sound of the television coming from Sirius's room. Unsure of what just happened with Marlene, she decided to leave Sirius be and go on to her own room. Maybe she'd talk to him in the morning about it all; she was too emotionally exhausted to contemplate their relationship, or lack thereof, tonight.. Besides, they had a supper at James's and Lily's tomorrow night; they'd have to be face-to-face one way or another.

Sirius heard her through the door. Once he heard hers click shut, he reached inside his bedside table where he had quickly discarded the files that the P.W.I. had sent to him earlier that morning. 

* * *

**A/N:** All the beta love to ravenclawmidwife! Let me know what you think! Chapter 11 is finished, should be in the editing stage soon! Love you guys!


	11. Only Fools Rush In

Sirius sighed ominously as he heard the door close behind him. His feelings weren't hurt, though it did sting a bit. He cared for Marley, but at the moment, she was just too much of a nuisance. He wanted to figure out everything that was going on with him, especially the shit he'd endured through just the week before. He wanted to figure out Hermione and whatever the fuck she was pulling, as well as where they stood. Was that so much to ask for? And for _silence_? For one goddamn moment of silence? He walked into his room and slammed the door, kicking his boots off. Just as he was to sit down, he noticed the envelope he had thrown in there earlier. An even heavier weight settled on both of his shoulders and his hands felt like two-tonne bricks, unable to be lifted to reach for the mail that held information on the woman he was so desperate to know. He heard the door of the flat open, alerting him his roommate's return. All the weight lifted as he reached over and tossed the files into the drawer of his table as he was unsure if she'd stop by and say hello. He hopped onto his bed, turned on the telly, crossed his feet and threw his arms casually behind his head awaiting her knock. But, it never came; he heard her door shut instead. He let out a sigh of relief, waited just a few moments more to make sure he was safe. He reached back into his table. It was now or later and if he were honest with himself, it was best to just get it out of the way. What could be worse than her conspiring with his estranged brother?

 _Dear Mister Black,_

 _Within this envelope you'll find everything that I have found on Miss Hermione Granger. I have not found out much in the week I have been trailing her, however, I have come across only a handful of interesting things. She is indeed the granddaughter of Sir Hector Dagworth-Granger and is in possession of a large sum of money. She also owns the profits to the funds of all that Mister Dagworth-Granger kept up with for stocks and such. The bank has revealed that she keeps it on a tight scale as she doesn't want to be seen as a high ranking individual, so to speak. I hope you find all satisfactory. If you have any questions or concerns, please feel free to contact me via Owl Post or you may visit me at my office._

 _Sincerely,_

 _D. Diggle_

Sirius turned the page and was met with photographs. The first few were of her doing market runs. She looked so normal. Her hair plaited to the side, band t-shirts... _focus, Sirius!_ Though he was captivated by her grace, he could see from the first few pictures, she was sullen and tired. Slowly, they started to become awake, but never completely happy however, he could see the curve at the corners of her lips pointing upwards just slightly. The others were of her coming and going to Flourish and Blotts to visit Remus…. A note attached to it: _A lover, perhaps? The man working wouldn't give much away. I tried many tactics, he just wouldn't budge._

A sudden bout of guilt played over him; _what am I doing?_ He continued to flip the images until he came across one where she was inside a dark shop. Sirius recognised it as Borgin and Burkes. Hermione was standing alone, then was met by Regulus. The palms of his hands became clammy and his heartbeat jolted. He couldn't decipher whether it was jealousy or anger. The next picture was of her showing Regulus a photograph, the subject of which he couldn't see, and then the pair were standing at the jewelry counter…there was no familiarity between the two as far as he could tell. On the back of the last photo was a note: _I had spoken to Regulus Black about Miss Granger; the only information he would provide was that Miss Granger had been looking for an old piece of jewelry belonging to her Great-Aunt._

The sudden realisation hit him: He was in the wrong. He was the one fucking up, acting like he was a higher power and he had no right to. He had no say in what she did in her life. Perhaps Regulus really was only meeting with her to tell her he couldn't find the jewelry…perhaps it was actually a business meeting for her grandfather's vaults. _Still doesn't seem right, as Regulus is a stupid fucking Death Eating lunatic._ However, Regulus _did_ work and if he was anything like he was when he was younger, he took his work seriously.

" _Shit_ ," the last letter within the mess stated that as far as Dedalus could tell, Hermione was a woman living as any other young, rich Witch would be with a probable love interest. Sirius rubbed his aching head, then tossed all the work Mr Diggle had constructed together back inside the drawer. He reached for the remote and turned his television off. It was time he apologised to Hermione without fully coming out saying, _Sorry for spying on you, but you're a pretty cool gal._ He snorted. _Also, I am mad about you, as stupid as it sounds, and I don't know why. But you haven't left my mind ever since our night together._ He threw his legs over the side of his bed and stood up, pulling off his shirt and tossing it to the floor. _Or the fact that every time I see you, my stomach fumbles._ He padded over to the doors that led out to the small balcony. _EVerytime you smile, all the darkness in my life fades away._ Lighting up a cigarette, he looked out at the falling sun, fading light intermingling with the shadows, stars mingling with the grey clouds. _It's all wrong, I got it. You've made that very, very clear._ He listened to cars screeching in the distant, birds chirping their nighttime melodies, and dogs barking out their mile long song. _But why?_ He wished he was back at Hogwarts with his friends; his only worry was the full moon or getting detention, getting caught outside his dormitory after hours. He lost himself in thought as he watched the sun melt into periwinkle skies.

….

 _Regulus insisted on walking Hermione home; after all she had confessed today, he was surprised she was able to stand. They had talked for awhile after her initial revelation, and she found herself taken with how well she could let it all out to Regulus. She wasn't sure if it was because of the Unbreakable Vow or because he was so easy to talk to, either way, it was good. But, she also made it very clear she was a strong woman and could well take care of herself. Still, with her secrets, he wished to get her back safely home._

 _"I don't know what to make of you and my brother. You just don't seem the Sirius Black type," Regulus chuckled._

 _"I can't really say that Sirius Black_ is _my type, but something about him makes me feel… I don't know the right term to use without sounding like a heap of cheese."_

 _The younger Black shook his head, "You're saying this because of your past with him, or because you feel this way about him now?"_

 _She shook her own head, "Honestly, Regulus, I don't know. In the future, he always looked out for me. For example, at holiday festivities, I'd be his first choice to be on his team, over his own godson, if that tells you anything. I, of course, had no idea then what it was for… but as far as I can tell, I've been here before because of past conversations he and I have had."_

 _"So do you think you're in a loop?" he asked._

 _"I have no clue. Because, if that were the case, how would I be sent back to change the future and have the outcome of what I told you? I have been reading in Narcissa's diaries. I have bought every type of Time-Turner book I can get my hands upon and I haven't found anything remotely explaining my situation."_

 _"I wish I had the answer for you, Granger. But, seeing as, before today, I thought what you have achieved was highly impossible. You're a real gem."_

 _She blushed, "Mm… far from it. Perhaps a nice rock. I think that you're right though. If we work together, we can fix things and along the way, maybe learn a thing or two about life… about ourselves."_

 _He smirked crookedly, "You've lost a lot. I hope that you can have it all back, but there is a chance that it won't happen...so, I think that maybe you should take a chance on something big to make yourself happy."_

 _Hermione knitted her brows, "Changing the future will make me happy, Regulus… I don't think anything else could remotely compare to that."_

 _"I can think of something else…"_

 _"What would that be?" she asked, completely oblivious._

 _"Sirius would make you happy. It's as if you get lighter when you speak of him. You smile more, you share more memories about him than you do anyone else of your past."_

 _Hermione went to argue but was quickly quieted by one look that told her otherwise._

 _"He's… my brother and as estranged as we may be, he deserves to be happy, especially if things can't change… I'd rather him at least have the memories of you than not living or loving at all. After everything he's been through, the shit my family has done to him…unspeakable things…."_

 _Hermione stopped mid-step to turn to the man, "I love Sirius, do not get me wrong… but falling in love seems a bit far-fetched. I understand your remorse and I know it's easier said than done, however, you can't think like that."_

 _Regulus smiled sadly, "Must say, Granger, if your heart weren't already spoken for, I'd be after your hand."_

 _Hermione smiled back and squeezed his hand. "Then you'd surely be cut from the family tree."_

 _He crinkled his nose in confusion, "Why would that be the case?"_

 _She smiled sadly up at him, "Because I am Muggleborn, Regulus."_

 _His face didn't appear shocked or angry. Instead, he crookedly smirked and said, "And a damn good witch."_

 _Surprised by this, Hermione stepped closer to him, "Would you mind awfully if I hug you?"_

 _"Honestly, woman, I have been wanting to hug you for a while now, after everything you told me," he said quietly._

 _"Why didn't you?" She was used to people from her time hugging her whenever the moment called for it… but she had never quite had that type of relationship with a Pureblood such as Regulus._

 _"Etiquette, Miss Granger."_

 _She rolled her eyes and threw her arms around him. It'd been so long since he had hugged someone, he had almost forgotten what it felt like. After some time, Hermione released her arms from around him._

 _"Would it be so bad," the man asked, as he looked down at his polished shoes, "to be knocked off that damn tree?"_

 _Hermione shrugged sadly, "I don't know where you stand with your family…"_

 _"I… am not sure if I know that myself. What I do know is, I do love Sirius. I miss him, a lot. I'd love to be reacquainted with him. I'd like to make things right, but I don't think he'd ever forgive me. Not with the mess I am in - the work I do."_

 _"I think you'd be surprised. Sirius isn't the boy you once knew. He's a man with a lot of potential, and is so very brave. He loves you so much, Regulus, and I know this from his own words. He practically killed himself over the fact that he didn't give you the chance when he was told to… Maybe that is something I can change this time around… maybe you two can fix everything."_

 _Regulus sighed remorsefully, "Let's focus on you first, Granger… then we will go from there. Deal?"_

 _"I can't make any promises I'll heed your advice," she said stubbornly._

 _"No," he blinked. "But you will."_

She stood outside Sirius's door for longer than she anticipated. There was a significant part of her that didn't want to go inside and talk about their feelings due to his espionage earlier in the day. What was he planning to do with the information if he had heard anything? Was he going to arrest her? Would he tell her to go back to 1998? She had to remind herself that Sirius likely hadn't heard anything at all. Still, it irked her that he'd even attempt such a thing… though she really shouldn't be all that surprised. This was Sirius Black! She wouldn't be shocked if he'd hired someone to follow her around... _oh, gods_...for his sake and hers, she hoped like hell he hadn't.

Pressing her forehead against the door, she raised one hand flat, trying to will herself to knock. _It doesn't matter though_. With her other hand, she rubbed her eyes. She didn't want to talk about the spying; she understood his logic, even if it were an invasion of privacy. It did make her a little angry, but she couldn't bring it up without giving too much away. She knew she'd have to push her resentment aside. _I need him._ If she wanted to get anywhere in this timeline, if she wanted help, and at least a chance at happiness, she needed to lean on Sirius, give their relationship a chance. The thought of needing him made her feel less of a heroine and more of a damsel. _Stop it._ Her stomach bounced. The back of her throat felt as if it were closing in. Her knees were shaky and her arms were weakened at the thought of seeing him. _Breathe, Granger._ It wasn't her voice this time telling her what to do - it was Regulus's beckoning her to go on…she just wasn't ready. Slowly moving her hand down the wood of the door, she curled her fingers just enough to press her nails into it. Another breath, she moved away, turned, and went back to her room. Shutting off the light, she nestled deep into her covers, and stared out the window at the sky and the grey clouds lit up by the moon. She'd never know that Sirius had been standing on the other side of her door, his forehead and a hand pressed against it, fighting the urge to go to her.

...

 **A/N:** Short chapter! Still has meaning! He next chapter is underway! Hope you enjoyed this, give some love to ravenclawmidwife! She's really the hero here, helping me out with all my grammatical errors! Tell me what you think' xoxo, blue.


	12. All Fun and Games Until

"Darling, you must've arrived home awfully late last night. You missed dinner. I sent for you at Borgin's, but was told that you had left early for business," Walburga greeted her son.

Regulus sat down across from his cousin Narcissa. "Cissa, good to see you." He nodded his head toward the blonde, then turned to his Mother. "I had errands to run." He smirked, then placed the cloth napkin over his lap. "Good morning, Father."

Orion nodded in affirmation as he read over _The Daily Prophet,_ busily muttering over how the newspaper had turned to rubbish and told lies.

"Errands for whom, dear?" Walburga batted her lashes rapidly.

Regulus shrugged as he spun cream into the coffee. "Erm, _personal_ , Mother."

Walburga was a very pompous, pushy woman. She had short, burnt orange hair, with a pair of blue eyes that could stare right through one's soul if they were simple enough to allow her. "Personal for who?" She smiled with as much innocence as she could muster, seemingly oblivious that the mouse was extremely aware of the games this evil feline was playing. She assumed it was her business, like she was important to the Dark Lord. She steepled her fingers, her scarlet talons shining in the candlelight.

"For myse—"

"Aunt Wally, did you hear that Bella has chosen a name for the baby if it's a boy?" Narcissa cut in, noticing her younger cousin's anxiousness.

Walburga jerked her neck to the young woman, shocked that the young witch would be so rude. Nonetheless, she pursed her blood red lips, "No. I did not. What has she come up with?" She retrieved her cup from its dish, staring devilishly at the blonde.

She smirked to her aunt. As far as Regulus could see, Narcissa was making it all up. " _Simon_. Simon Isaac Lestrange."

Disgust crawled over Walburga's lips. "Uchkf! _Simon Isaac_? What kind of name is that? It's a filthy Muggle name, if I've ever heard of one! That's what that is! How disastrous… I can't believe your mother and father would even allow that. I'll have to speak with them! I can't believe Bellatrix would even consider! That's almost as bad as your blood-traitor sister running off with that filth."

"Oh, _I must say_ , Aunt Wally… I agree, that's why I said something! It was troubling me so… What a horrible thing to put upon our family name. _My,_ the trouble it would be for anyone to think we are in cahoots with Muggles!"

Regulus hid a laugh at his Mother's disgusted face. He was quietly interrupted by his Father. " _Son, we need to speak in private_." The men excused themselves, without notice, from their seats and walked down the dark portraiture halls to Orion's study; Walburga's voice echoing.

"Shut the door behind you." The room hadn't changed much over the years: big, round, leather, and brown. It was a room he and Sirius used to sit by the fire when they were younger, awaiting their father's work to be done, back when they both meant something to him — Regulus was more of a prize then. Now he was a possession. And his brother now nothing at all. The wizard was taken from his recollection when he heard liquid being poured.

" _Sit_." Orion slid a short glass across the wood.

Regulus took the amber liquid into his hands, only to rub his thumb over the rim, "What is it, Father? All is well, I trust?"

Orion was a tall, intimidating man. His hair had whitened over the years and balded down the centre, with a pair of matching eyebrows; he had a strong, slanted nose, and silver eyes. He sat forward, leaning his forearms onto the desk, his cuff links gleaming as he knitted his fingers into a weave. "You've been of age for a while now, son."

Regulus nodded, unsure of where this conversation was going.

"We've given you ample amount of time to find someone to marry and you've shown no interest in anyone. Why is that?" Orion's face was blank and gave away nothing, save disappointment. "We've held plenty of parties on your behalf for you to find a witch of your choosing."

Suddenly, the glass in Regulus's hands felt warranted; he swirled it… just waiting for the perfect moment to inhale the fiery contents. "Sir, I didn't realise you and Mother were awaiting me to — to find someone to marry. I would have begun courting someone ages ago." _Lie number one._

"We didn't push it, as we know you have a lot of work to do for our _saviour_ and _lord_ , Voldemort," he said caustically. "Your mother and I are getting older as you know… our health isn't all up to par anymore. There is no telling how much time either of us have left." He paused to take a drink of his whisky, "In order for our vaults to be taken care of, our _only_ son needs to be betrothed to seal the security of the funds."

An arrangement of aggressive feelings spiraled up inside of him. The drink was beginning to look more and more appealing. With what he was about to say...he wasn't sure how to word it without causing too much of a problem. "Sir…" Regulus began. _You have another son. Sirius. Remember him? Tall, dark, handsome — looks just like you and I._ "I am not the rightful heir."

Orion sat back into his chair and crossed a leg over his other casually. "Sirius made his choice long ago. _You_ need to be married. _You_ are the priority. Your cousin, Narcissa… she's over the age of marriage now; she should have been married years ago — you will take the honour. That is why we invited her over for breakfast, so the two of you can… sort this out," Orion stated brazenly.

 _No. No. No!_ Regulus began coughing, _choking_ , to the point his throat grew dry. "I'm… I'm _not_ marrying m-my… Narcissa!"

Orion's eyes widened, "I beg your pardon?! You will do as I say, boy! Quit being a pussy and do what's right by your family!"

Regulus could barely find words for how angry he was. He had never spoken to Orion with such a tone before — adrenaline pumped sweat into his palms and over his brow line.

"The Blacks have a long line of marrying their family, to keep our blood pure. This would be no different. _You_ are a product of that."

Regulus rolled his eyes openly. "Father, I won't, for many reasons. She's supposed to be marrying—" no one knew Narcissa was marrying Lucius yet, he remembered, " _Lestrange_."

The older Black sat back into his chair, staring at Regulus prevalently. "That whole disaster was called off nearly a week ago. She begged like a child at her _daddy's_ feet that she couldn't marry him," Orion mocked. "Thought _you'd_ be better than that, myself."

Regulus's nostrils flared as he closed his eyes, taking in a deep, powerful breath to try to stay calm. "I have done… _everything_ you and Mother have ever asked me to do." His hand landed on his left forearm, the Mark covered by the material of his sleeve. "I have never asked anything of the two of you."

Orion chuckled lowly, "Never ask us of anything, do you, boy? How about a home to live in? _Money_ — for your future family to have? You can't say you don't ask for it."

Regulus felt the anger burn in the soles of his feet. "I have _never_ asked for any of that. You have given it to me as a father should take care of his child; once I came of age, I began to work. I make my own money. "

"And you think you can get on with life with that shit pay? Is that what you're saying?"

" _I -" can._

Orion cut him off before he could finish. "You will begin courting Narcissa. Tonight."

"I do not want to marry Narcissa. And I don't want to marry for the sake of our family funds. I will _not_ marry, Narcissa Black. _Because_ …" _because? Because why, Reg?_ At this point, Regulus wasn't sure if he'd be jinxed, cursed or, burnt from the family tree; quite honestly, he felt for the first time that he'd be just fine with the latter.

"Because? What?"

Regulus was exasperated that he even had to answer this question. Really, truly, deep down, he knew his family would never understand his feelings on this. "I have met someone." _Shit. Lie number two._

Orion slapped his tumbler glass onto his desk with a disgusted crow. " _Is that so_? Do we _know_ of her?"

"No. She's… _Erm,_ the personal business I was telling Mother about at breakfast." He held his breath.

Orion squinted his eyes in thought, then said, "Bring her to dinner sometime next week. I want to see if she's… _fit_ for the family."

Regulus stood, nodded, then finally took his glass of whisky to his lips and drained it with one gulp, never giving Orion a second glance. He felt insulted, angry, disgusted, repulsed, and couldn't come up with words for the resentment he held toward the man he called Father. And, _shit!_ He had a huge favour to ask of Hermione, with no right at that. He rubbed his temples as he walked toward the sitting room when he noticed his cousin waiting for him on the sofa, holding a pillow cushion between her arms.

"Cissa?"

She sadly smiled up at him. She patted the seat alongside her and said, "C'mon, Reggie, we should talk."

He nodded and moved to her side. "Why didn't you warn me, cousin?"

She squeezed the bridge of her nose. "I didn't even know until last night. I fought with daddy and, " she grabbed hold of Regulus's hands, "I tried. I don't want this either. But I felt you were a better choice than that disgusting fool of a man that they had me matched with. So, I sucked it up and said okay."

Regulus pulled his hand from Narcissa's in disgust, "You're _okay_ with this arrangement? Cissa, I thought better of you!"

She tilted her head forward and whispered, "I am _not._ I have my own plans…"

"So do I." Narcissa raised a finger to her lips to quiet her cousin. He knitted his brows in curiosity, still he continued to speak. "I have met someone and I will be bringing her to dinner this next week." _I hope._

"Really? Who?"

"You wouldn't know her." _Yet._

"That's great and all, Reggie. But I still have my plans and I need your help." She kept her voice at a whisper, "I'm going to marry Lucius Malfoy."

….

 _What the bloody hell are you thinking, Padfoot? Having an investigator follow after Hermione? That is a completely new low for you! I could have told you she was as normal as you and I! I would have come to you sooner, but my schedule has been busy. Lucky for you it was, because I would have kicked your arse werewolf-style. If you wanted to know anything, you could have asked me. Damn, I would have told you what you needed to know. You are a bloody arsehole. And you know it too, because you never mentioned it to me. Wanker. See you later. Maybe. I'm too pissed at you to make plans._

Neatly drawn beside his last word was an angry face with a tongue stuck out, blowing raspberries.

— _Moony_

Sirius couldn't say he wasn't expecting anything less from his pal Remus. As soon as he had read that Diggle spoke to Moony, he knew his arse would be reamed. He was surprised it wasn't a Howler, but he reckoned that was because Hermione did live here, after all; mad or not, Remus wouldn't betray him like that. Sirius tossed the letter aside, cursing himself. He knew he had fucked up, he wouldn't be forgiving himself for a while, and with Remus knowing now, he'd probably never live it down. He was just thankful that Frank hadn't told anyone. First strike of the day, he supposed. If it got to three, he'd cancel the evening and go back to sleep. That's where he was at in life mentally, just now. Switching his senses, he listened for Hermione's feet moving about, but heard nothing. Glancing at the clock, he was that it was _only_ nine and he was rather perturbed that his friend sent a letter so early, though he did deserve it. He crept out of his room with a towel slung over his shoulder. As he was turning, he stepped right onto Hermione's toes. "Oh!"

" _Ow_!" He yelled, she screeched. She splashed coffee down the front of her t-shirt and his. Her toes ached and both of their skin were blotchy, swollen, and burnt.

"Bloody, _fuck_! Let someone know you're around, would you!" He scrutinized as he dried himself with the towel, and guilelessly began patting her shirt.

"Sorry," she said, taking the towel from him. "I wasn't paying attention…," she dipped her head toward the discarded book on the floor.

He furrowed his brows and scrunched his nose, "Why are you reading, walking, and drinking all at the same time? Haven't you ever heard of sitting and doing those things? Damn, Hermione, I'd think you'd be more aware of your surroundings."

Embarrassed, she drew in her bottom lip, her eyes never leaving the book. "I'm sorry, okay? I burnt myself, too. I didn't do it on purpose."

He could see that he was being a dick and sighed. He bent down and grabbed her reading material, catching the title, _Lost in Time: A Guide to Finding Your Way Back._ He said nothing, but was extremely curious. He handed it to her, "Only caught me off guard… I didn't hear you. I was trying to be quiet, thought you might be trying to get more sleep."

"I've actually not been asleep. I couldn't," she said, now holding the book close to her chest.

"That type of reading material capture your attention?" he crossed his arms as he leaned against the wall.

Pushing a strand of fallen hair from her braid behind her ear, she nodded. "Time-Travel fascinates me."

"Well, if you can figure out a way to take me back to about three weeks ago, let me know, I'd like a one-way ticket." He huffed and moved passed her to the bathroom.

Her shoulders fell. " _Ouch._ That's not rude or anything."

He was standing in the bathroom now, the light glowing nicely around his form; Hermione chastised herself for even noticing as this wasn't what she needed to pay attention to, especially with the egotistical attitude he'd adopted. He threw the coffee-soaked towel onto the counter and looked at her. "What?" He didn't even look at her, and if he were honest with himself, he was afraid to. He could see from his peripheral vision that she was holding herself tight. He was being an asshole without even meaning to be. But if he could just go back to right before _she_ got here, he'd be in a much better position in life. He'd be working, probably wouldn't have killed anyone, things would be fine with Marley…. Hell, he'd not even have to wake up to bitchy letters from his friends about what a wanker he was being to a girl he insisted live with him, even though he hardly knew her. Waking up to Remus and his scolding wasn't exactly breakfast in bed, then being scorched with hot coffee wasn't all sunshine and daisies, either. Hermione needed to go back to where she came from. _Fuck, I'll find you a goddamn Time-Turner and send you somewhere._ He took in a deep breath. The better part of him knew he didn't mean it. What he really did mean was an apology, which is what she deserved. "I'm sorry, Ace. To be perfectly honest, I've had a bit of a rough start, your coffee, me," he pointed to himself and the brown stain on his t-shirt, "I'm sorry."

She nodded slightly, "It's all right. I'm sorry as well. I'll make sure to call out next time." She looked down at her toes, "what, um… what time do you want to leave for your friend's house this evening?"

 _Why? Do you have places to go? People to see? Another rendezvous with my brother?_ "It doesn't matter. Do you have a preference?" he said sourly. _Well, that apology just went out of the window._

"Look, you obviously woke on the wrong side of your bed this morning, but I don't deserve this attitude. The coffee spill was an accident, and I wasn't sitting in the living room thinking to myself, _Oh, when Sirius gets up, I want to pour my scalding coffee all over him so I can make sure he has a bad day!_ So, whatever has your balls in a twist, I'd appreciate if you untwist them and treat me with a little more damn respect. I don't care to go to your friend's house. _You_ asked _me_ to go over there, remember? I was doing _you_ a favour. Get _over_ yourself, Sirius Black!" She stepped into the bathroom, reached around Sirius's body and grabbed the knob. She looked up at him; their eyes met, and his were daring. "You wouldn't."

She turned her head just slightly and pursed her lips, then slammed the door shut in his face.

Inside the bathroom, Sirius's nostrils flared and he curled his lips into utter resentment. Then he heard her door slam. He clenched his hand around that doorknob so fast, the door casted wind through his hair. "Ace?!" He stormed out of the bathroom and toward her bedroom and began knocking harshly. "Hermione!"

" _Go away, you arse!"_ she yelled back.

"You had no right to do that! I didn't deserve it!" he said. _Yes, you did, you dimwit!_

In the room, Hermione sat on the bed with crossed arms and an open mouth. " _Are you joking?"_ She knew it was ploy for her to open the door. He knew for a damn fact that he deserved that _and_ more. " _You think I deserve your arsehole attitude? Do you have that little respect for me?"_

Sirius curled his hair around his fist and knotted it. He took a deep breath and pressed his hand against the wall next to her door. "'M sorry, okay? You're right! I was an arsehole. I have no excuse for it. You don't deserve it _and_ I don't mean to disrespect you. Would you please…" _come out here._

Hermione already opened the door, she leaned against the siding with her own arms over her chest and legs crossed. Relief fell over him as her pretty amber eyes looked up at him. "Do you want to talk about it?" she partly knew that this was his way of pushing down the guilt of his spying yesterday, but she couldn't very well say that, could she?

"T-talk about what?" he inwardly chastised himself. He just wanted to curl her up in his arms and kiss her, touch her. Everything about Regulus, the P.W.I., the letter from Moony weren't even in his mental hindsight at this point. The argument they just had left his mind. Instead, he was left with a fuzzy brain, and if he dared to move, likely tripped-over feet.

" _Why you're so bothered by whatever it is you're bothered by."_ He barely heard her say. He watched as her lips moved, and the way the aggravation made the colour of her eyes change from that pretty amber to chocolate. " _I may not know you like the back of my hand, but I thought you'd not get so mad at something so trivial as spilt coffee._ "

" _It_ _was_ … it was hot!" he defended, and puffed his chest.

She raised an eyebrow. "So? It was an accident. I was not trying to attack you. I don't know why you're throwing up a defense toward me, unless you are having some sort of post traumatic stress from your mission… and if that is the case, there are people who can help you with that. _I_ can help with that."

He could see she wasn't trying to pity him. "I don't need…" He watched as her walls were beginning to go back up. "I don't want to talk 'bout my mission. It's nothing against you, Ace. I just have my own demons to face and I took it out on you. I am truly, deeply, sincerely sorry for being an arse."

She smiled sadly up at him as she reached out to touch his shoulder, "It's okay. But the next time, I will not hesitate to hex you."

He chuckled when she openly smiled at him. "I'm going to take a shower. Will you still come with me?" he asked as he was walking away.

"To the shower?" she asked teasingly.

He stopped in his tracks and turned back to her, "Are you offering?"

She shook her head subtly all while smiling coyly at him and went back inside her room.

….

Hermione stayed in her room the rest of the day. She had ordered pizza at one point and that was the only time she left the confines of her walls. As she had passed by Sirius's room, she knocked and called, " _Pizza on the table!"_ After closing her own door, she heard his open. She looked through Narcissa's third diary as the dates were coinciding with her current time frame. She found herself beginning to empathize with the woman through her words; she had a hard time relating to a lot of the things that Narcissa had said, but she could really feel her emotion. She hadn't come across anything as of yet that related to a way to change the future, but she didn't want to skip anything and risk missing any pertinent information. The only thing that she found different thus far wasn't really _all_ that odd, as she knew the Black Family heritage of inbreeding… but Narcissa wrote that her parents had declared it her duty to bring an heir to the family, and since she didn't want to marry the Lestrange, she needed to wed someone and currently that someone was Regulus. Hermione had been caught quite off guard by that revelation. Regulus hadn't mentioned anything to her at their meeting. She hadn't ever even heard of this story in the future which scared her; had Sirius really not known? How much more would she discover?

Hermione normally didn't mind reading on and on, but the cursive scrawl began to make her eyes criss-cross and gave her a bit of a headache. She had just quit reading that last entry when she seen the clock blinked _five-thirty_.

She and Sirius never settled on a time to leave for James and Lily's, but she figured it'd be soon. She buried the diary back inside her bag in the closet and grabbed clothes that she deemed acceptable for a casual get together at _my best friend's parents._ That thought saddened her a bit, but made her eager too. If she could get on great terms with them, maybe it'd be the start of saving their lives. Surprised that her flat mate hadn't come by her room since their earlier spat, she wondered if he was still mad at her even after a lighthearted tease. _He has no reason to be._ She hoped he wasn't, because if so, that'd make for a very awkward trip.

Feeling refreshed after a quick shower, she went to the living room to find Sirius standing at the door with his back to her, smoking a cigarette. He had on a leather jacket and black pair of Muggle jeans that fit his arse nicely. A blush crept up her neck. Reaching up and pulled the clinging collar of her own jacket away, she cleared her throat. Sirius turned swiftly and smirked crookedly at her. His hair laid over his shoulders and a hand hung out of his pocket. It hit her out of nowhere when her breath caught right at the top of her throat: he was fucking beautiful.

"Ready to go, Ace?" he asked huskily. She wasn't sure if she was making that up in her mind, but damn it — he looked like he just stepped from a romance sitcom.

"Um-m. Y-eah, _ahem,_ yes. Ready."

He eyed her knowingly, because he felt and looked at her the same way. He wished like hell they'd both be vocal about it, but he knew he'd need to get over himself for what he did to her, as well as the spying, before he could admit his feelings aloud… but also because this girl was different from all the women he had ever met, which, to him, made her rare and fragile.

He nodded toward the fireplace, "It's one of the only floo mine's connected to," he smirked. "Want to go together or separately?"

She eyed the small space, but she knew if he went first, she'd begin to have a panic attack, because as badly as she wanted to meet the two people who'd made her best friend, she was nervous. And it wouldn't be proper for her to go first, as it wasn't _her_ friends' home they were going to. "Sure, we can go together."

She seen the glint of satisfaction cross Sirius's eyes, he held out his arm for hers. They stood close enough for Padfoot's senses to heighten at her scent. He liked the way her hair fell over her shoulders in soft curls, and _her_ leather jacket; he wondered briefly if she was wearing it for him. Her eyes had a bit darker makeup than usual, but he liked the way it caused her eyes to shine. Just for a split moment, he looked away from her to grab the floo powder. She looked up at him and took in a silent whiff of the cologne he was wearing. They stepped into the hearth, without taking their eyes off one another. Hermione barely heard him, though she watched as his lips moved, when he said: _Godric's Hollow._

* * *

 **A/N:** forever the greatest at beta'ing, ravenclamidwife (insert hugs and hearts here)


	13. Your Pretty Face and Electric Soul

The green flames engulfed them in depths of blackness until they stepped onto the wood floors of the cottage. A stone wall led up to the staircase, with a burnt gold couch set against it, and a shaggy maroon carpet beneath. A overstuffed chair sat in the corner, piled with pillows, next to a coffee table covered in books. It was cosy, real, and reminded her much of the Gryffindor common room she had grown to know. A smile instantly appeared on Hermione's lips... this was Harry's original home. She twirled her wand around herself and Sirius to clean them of the soot and ash. The aroma of dinner invaded her nose and made her stomach rumble.

Sirius glanced at her, "Hungry?"

Hermione chuckled, embarrassed. She laid a hand over her belly, "A bit."

" _Sirius? Is that you?_ " a female voice called out. She came walking from another room, a towel hung over her shoulder. She was sporting a pair of Muggle capris and a white blouse. Her feet were bare, her hair was worn long down her back. Hermione froze when the woman came up smiling, as her emerald green eyes bore into her own. It was much different from when they met through the looking glass. Harry. "Hullo! Bout time we properly met!" she joked, reminding Hermione of the night they originally spoke. " _Lily_!" she pointed to herself, never faltering from her jovial attitude.

Hermione quickly ran the nerves away to keep from looking like a complete nutter in front of these people. She wiped the sweat from her hands down her jeans, "Sorry, _soot_!" she said, stepping away from the comfort of Sirius, then reached out to shake Lily's hand. "It's so nice to meet you."

"Likewise, c'mon, I'm just finishing up supper. Sirius, Jamie is out back with the boys!"

He raised his brows and rubbed his hands together, "Great, don't talk too much rubbish, Lil." Winking at Hermione, he said, "Need anything, just call out, Ace."

"Don't worry, Sirius. I'll take care of her," the redhead teased while lightly pushing him toward the back door and opening it. The sound of men hollering for their friend came and went as Lily shut the door and turned back to Hermione. "They act like they never see each other," she rolled her eyes humorously.

A morbid thought entered Hermione's mind at how true that would be in the near future if she were unable to change anything. Enough of that, she plastered on a grin and went with it. "My friends used to be like that, too. Except it was like that after classes," she said, remembering how Ron and Harry would unite like it'd been weeks from one another after an hour-long class.

The inside of Lily and James's kitchen was exactly how Hermione imagined it. A round table, with mismatched chairs around it, sat in the middle of the room. The cabinets were a dark wood, and the counters a shade of yellow. Red brick adorned the wall behind the stove and a stained glass window that was slightly open over the deep sink. "I love your home."

Lily nodded, "Thank you! It belonged to my grandparents. We've been thinking about fixin' it up. Jamie wants to make it more _wizardish_ — whatever that means," she shrugged.

"I think it's lovely just the way it is," Hermione complemented truthfully, as she knew Lily was Muggleborn and probably found solace in holding onto something from her own world.

The fiery redhead opened the refrigerator and over her shoulder asked, "Want something to drink? We've got Muggle fizzy drinks, butterbeer, whisky. Or water."

"I'll have whatever you're having," Hermione answered, even though she was sure that the whisky would probably help calm her nerves better than whatever she was about to be given.

Lily sat down with two bottles of Butterbeer and two shots of whisky; she'd apparently had the same thought. She slid one over to her guest. "You've nothing to be wary of Hermione, I'm not going to interrogate you or anything like that! I only want to get to know you."

The brunette took a breath, her lips slightly curving up, "Thanks. I am just not used to really getting out aside from the business my family left me; otherwise, I'm a homebody. Sirius looked like a lost puppy when he asked me to come over here. I could hardly say no."

Lily shook her head knowingly, "He has a way of being manipulative without really manipulating." Hermione chuckled in agreement. "But, 'nough 'bout him. Tell me of you, where're ya from?"

Hermione spread her hands over the table, "I moved from Compiègne, France." A fact which was not wholly a lie, as her family did hail from there. "Due to my grandfather's passing and Mister Master Manipulator inviting me to live with him, that is how I ended up here." She grabbed the neck of her bottle and swallowed away the guilt of another lie.

Lily laughed, "I heard about all that. It's strange, that's for sure, but I think it's nice; a bit of a meet-cute situation, if you ask me." She watched as Hermione's cheeks reddened, taking this as a sign of vulnerability towards her friend. "He has been a bit lonely ever since Jamie moved out. Which, in turn, made Sirius start working more, in the end making James a sad sod." She rolled her eyes, "but, I assure you, Sirius is good people. A little out there sometimes, overall though, a wonderful friend to have at your side." She grabbed the shot glass and gulped it back.

Hermione knew the truth of Lily's words… however, the stubbornness continued to get in the way. The witch followed suit with her own shot of whisky, letting the heat caress it's way down her throat when she felt a weird, unfamiliar sensation hit her mind. She took it as the whisky being strong, until Lily asked a question that made her well aware of what was happening. "Are you spying on Sirius?"

Hermione immediately shook her head no without having the chance to think on it — it was the truth.

"Are you working with Sirius's family to make him become a Death Eater?" Lily's eyes stared straight into Hermione's, watching for any reason to doubt the truth of the answer.

Hermione leant forward onto her forearms, feeling a bit foggy and nauseated in her stomach but she answered, seething, "I would never."

"Okay, last question and I'll set you free. Do you feel threatened or in any significant danger and if so, by whom?"

Hermione shook her head. Her speech slurred a bit when she said, " _No_ , but I've a — a question for you."

Lily nodded for her to go on.

"Whad— wha— _er_ ," she swallowed hard and tried to clear her eyes of the fogginess, "did you do to me?"

With a proud smirk, the fiery-redhead sat up a little taller in her seat. "It's called the _Jobberknoll Jinx_ — it's a potion charm I've come up with on my own. Little bit of truth serum and a smidge of memory potion, with mixture of my own concoctive spell. Once we're done here, you'll forget all about it; it'll be as if it _never_ happened."

Hermione pursed her lips and glared. She'd been played. Had Sirius known this would happen? Remus? Would they have intentionally allowed this? The still-conscious part of her brain was telling her that they had no clue. This must've been why everyone always said Lily was great with her potions and charms — that one would be surprised by the things the woman could do.

Hermione knew this wasn't out of malice — she was truly concerned. However, it wasn't really the best way to go about things in the her own opinion… "Any more questions?" the jinxed witch asked.

Lily shook her head, "That's all… for now." The woman stood and refilled the shot glass with untouched whisky and handed it back to Hermione — but not without recieving a look of distrust from Hermione. Lily just smiled and whispered, " _Obliviscaris omni!_ " then went to stir the supper.

The fog lifted from Hermione without explanation. She looked over at the woman who was standing at the stove now, mixing in the pot. Something inside of her twisted at the smell of the amber liquid when she brought it to her mouth. Wandlessly, she evaporated the drink before Lily turned around. Hermione looked up and smiled at the woman then picked up her butterbeer.

"Want to go outside with the guys?"

Hermione shrugged, "Who's all here?" _Not that it matters, Hermione — you aren't supposed to know these people._

Lily didn't seem to notice her guest's mistake, she only shrugged, and answered. "Remus, Jamie, Sirius, Peter— _Frank, his fiancée Alice will be here shortly."_

Hermione had quit listening after she heard Peter's name. Her head started to hurt and all she saw was red. She should just do it now — _kill him_. Unfortunately, and fortunately for him, she needed a better plan than cold-blooded murder. But the thought of holding her wand against that foolish man's head, meaning the forbidden curse as she said it, ignited a flame of maliciousness she hadn't ever felt before. The scary part about it: she felt no qualms about her murderous intent.

"— _ay_? _Hermione_?" Lily was leaning over the table, her hand on Hermione's forearm finally caught the woman's attention.

Hermione glanced up and shook herself inwardly, "I'm so sorry, I got lost there for a moment."

Lily looked genuinely concerned, "I only asked if you were okay. Can I get you water? Something to eat?"

She immediately nodded speaking with the first thing that popped into her head, "My blood sugar is rather low, you wouldn't mind if I had a plate?"

The redhead shifted, "Of course not! You should have said something, silly! I've made a roast, potatoes, carrots, we've got bread! What would you like? No! You know what? I'll just put it all on a plate! _Goodness_ , I feel terrible now. I should've asked… the boys usually just come and tell me when they want to eat."

Hermione could see where Harry's concern for others came from. The woman piddled around the kitchen effortlessly. She summoned a plate from the cabinet, while the meat magically cut itself. Like clockwork, Lily turned and placed the plate right before Hermione, "Eat up, we've got plenty." She smiled. "And, do _not_ hesitate in asking for more."

Hermione could cry. She wanted to cry, she was actually very close to tears— but she knew that she already looked a bit barmy. "Thank you, Lily."

The men had come bustling inside, smelling like a fire pit. Heat instantly rose from the abundance of bodies inside the little kitchen. Sirius sat down alongside Hermione, throwing his arm over her shoulder and winked — the kindling of sparks that heated up between them was never there when she knew him in the 90s, at least for her. She noticed her head telling her one thing and her body telling her another; it was becoming overwhelming.

Remus bent down and gave her a one-armed hug while he held his freshly poured bowl with his other hand— the chatter was loud and nonstop. Hermione hardly noticed the noise when Jamie appeared with Peter Pettigrew and a man that looked an awful like Neville at his side: Frank.

Her heart may've just stopped at the sight of James Potter. The messy-haired man standing before her was identical in all aspects, excepting, of course, the eyes, to Harry. It caused her heart to ache. She barely paid any mind to anyone else, their voices were like a hum of a bee when he spoke to her, "Hey, I'm James! Nice to finally meet the lovely bird Sirius has been talking nonstop about." He grinned from one ear to the other.

"I do not!" Sirius barked.

" _Do too!_ " Peter and James said in unison.

Frank shrugged and looked away, scratching the back of his head. Hermione looked over to the man sitting beside her, his cheeks were red. He wouldn't look at her.

 _Sirius trailed down the steps to the backyard toward the glowing fire. His best mates sat around it, individually doing their own things while simultaneously doing it together._

 _"Sirius!"_

 _"What's going on, mate?!"_

 _"Oi, looky, it's the stalker!" Moony cracked._

 _Sirius glared down at him, "I had my reasons, Moons."_

 _James threw his legs up on the stump before him and crossed his arms, "Do tell! What could she have possibly done to make you so creepy?"_

 _Sirius sat down on the log opposite him and shook his head, "When I met her she had a… a scent to her and it was that of a Black." He told his friends of his worries and, of course, he was lectured for his latest endeavour at following her — they were lax, at least for the nature of her meeting with his brother. Still, as their duty of being his best friends, it was only right to take the mickey out of him._

 _"Why don't you just tell her that you want to start something with her? What harm could there come with it? The worst she could say is no… and if that's the case you can move on," James said._

 _"Swallow your words, Potter. Was that how it worked for you and Evans?" He restrained his urges to fling swears around like tripping jinxes and used his middle finger instead._

 _James blew him a kiss and winked. "Lily and I are different."_

 _Sirius scoffed, "You're right. You were a numbskull who didn't know what the word 'no' meant." He shook his head, "But yet, here you are— in love and about to be married."_

 _"Hear, hear!" Remus held up his butterbeer in cheers, everyone following suit_

 _After a moment's worth of laughter, James looked at Sirius, "Do you love her, mate?"_

 _"It's a little too soon to be throwing that word out, don't you think?"_

 _James shrugged, "I knew I loved Lily the first time she ever scolded me for doing something stupid." He ran his fingers through his hair. It wasn't often that James really said anything about romance— but when he did, it was usually after a few drinks. No matter how drunk his words were, they were agile and had meaning, "Maybe it seems mad for even the thought of love, mate. But when you feel something you can't quite explain, or she pushes buttons you never thought could be pushed, and she makes you the angriest man in the world for even the smallest, stupidest thing, but all at the same time, calms you to the point that you had forgotten you were mad in the first place— I think you'd just know then. You'd know you love her."_

 _Sirius didn't say anything for a minute. He stared into the dancing orange flames, contemplating everything that James had said. He played their casual moments at home across his mind, rapidly followed by the feelings of sexual tension that had plagued the last few days, and finished with the memory of how her tight body had felt around his cock when she came. Without removing his sight from the fire, he sighed, "I think that I could love her — someday. If she lets me."_

….

An hour or so passed, a few drinks had been drunk and everyone was in a comfortable place. Hermione had let loose a bit and chatted along with Lily and Alice. They had been talking like they all had been friends for ages, and for once, Hermione felt like she was a part of something real, here, and true. They were in the middle of discussing Alice's wedding plans when they heard Sirius clear his throat and stand in the centre of the sitting room.

"Alright, ladies and gents — since we are all present, let's play a game." He smiled heartily, then pulled a pack of cards from his back pocket. " _Goblet of Death_ , anyone?"

James wooted, Remus pressed on his temples between his thumb and forefinger and shook head. Lily shook with laughter, Alice looked innocent, and Frank winked at her. Peter clapped his hands and yelled, " _Hell, yeah!_ " which caused Hermione to look up at Sirius in curiosity and fright — this, in turn, had him smirking at her.

"Ever heard of it before, Ace?" he asked, pretending as if anyone else in the room wasn't there.

She stared back him challengingly, "No, I haven't. Care to explain, Mr Black?" Neither of them noticed the knowing looks from the others.

Before he became too cocky from her undivided attention, he regretfully pulled his eyes away from hers, not paying any mind to James's wiggling brows. He popped his cheek with his tongue to diminish the laugh, " _Aha_ , so," he cleared his throat, "James, will you get the Goblet please, love? Oh, and fill it, too? Actually, just bring the whole bottle for me, would you?"

James rolled his eyes and smiled. He set the pillow he was cuddling down and squeezed Lily's knee before getting up. "Of course, my dearest."

Hermione worried her bottom lip as she watched Sirius. She liked the way he walked, he had such life and amp about him — his youthfulness was so wonderfully heartbreaking; she was having a hard time believing the man in the future was once this.

James came back in holding a handle of oak matured mead in one hand, made generously available by the lovely Madame Rosmerta. In the other hand was a beautiful goblin-made glass goblet, embellished with silver and rubies — much too elegant for a silly drinking game. He set it down in the middle of the table as Sirius began circling it with playing cards.

Hermione looked on in a curious manner, "are those Muggle playing cards?"

Sirius answered, without looking up, "Good eye, Ace, but not exactly."

The backs of the cards were black, but shined with outlines of silver foil, making up a celestial pattern; one Hermione was able to identify as Canis Major. "So the idea of it is," he said, sitting down on his arse and criss-crossing his legs, "we'll all sit in a circle around the table." He motioned for everyone to do so. "One player starts by picking a card — we usually start with the youngest. So that would be, well, when's your birthday?" he asked Hermione.

"September 19th."

"Alright, looks like I am the youngest. Again." They all laughed. "Anyway, I start, then the turns will proceed from me to the left. So, you will go after me." He nudged Hermione with his elbow, making her chuckle softly. "Each card has a rule. If you break that rule, the result will end in —"

"Sirius, you forgot the shots!" Peter shouted, then jumped up from his spot on the floor and ran to the kitchen, hurrying back with eight shot-glasses in tow.

"Right, so — if you fail to follow the rule of the card or deny the challenge that follows, you must take a shot. You with me so far?" he asked Hermione and Alice. They nodded, but looked skeptical. Lily leaned in and said to the other girls, "It'll make sense, promise."

Alice giggled, "Sure hope so, I'm not always up to speed on these types of games. But Frankie here has said you all played a lot of things like this back at school."

"Oh, did he now?" Remus teased.

Longbottom curled Alice beneath his arm and kissed her temple. "She's an innocent one, no?"

Hermione could see the love lavished between the pair, a sickness welled up in her belly, and she turned back to Sirius — everything was beginning to feel too real and she fought the urge to cry out. Not here, not now. Taking in a deep breath, she allowed herself to be free of it all, just for tonight.

Sirius noticed something off by the way Hermione's face fell after she looked at the newly engaged couple. He leaned over to her during the moment of everyone's chatter, "You okay?"

She nodded and forced a smile, "Yeah. Just missing home."

"Well, let's forget about it for a while?" She leaned her shoulder into his in agreement. Sirius smiled then brought his attention back to the group, "If you pull a Dumbledore, the bastard will yell at you with his own made up rule. It could be anything, I don't know, didn't make the rules."

" _Bullshit_!" James guffawed, "You and I made up these rules in sixth year!"

"Shut your goddamned mouth, Prongsy!" Sirius pointed his finger toward his mate with a shit-eating grin, causing a ruffle of laughter from his peers. "You do what the card tells you, if you don't you take a shot or drink from the goblet — _whatever_ it may demand. Then you have the Rowena Ravenclaw. Whoever pulls the card must ask a question, and in turn, must answer that question and with another question to a different player. The challenge here is each answered question must coincide in someway. If anyone fucks that up, Rowena will curse you for the next round with a tongue-tying jinx. The only way to get out of the curse before the round is up, is by calling on the Rowena card for a riddle and you must answer it correctly."

"This is why I hate this game," Remus teased, "too many rules."

"Thought you lived by the rules there, mate," James joked back.

Remus leaned over to his friend and laid an arm over his shoulder and growled playfully, "Only on _some_ days."

Hermione beamed at the friendships around her, setting her heart aflutter.

"So now we have the one and only Godric Gryffindor — he is a dare card. Whatever he may dare, you must do. Time to bring out the good ole Gryffindor bravery. If you decide you can't handle the dare, your hair will be turned into a lion's mane for a round."

"I don't think I'd need much help with that!" Hermione laughed, surprising everyone that she was able to joke about herself so openly.

"I've told you before, I _like_ your hair." Sirius licked his lips, then returned to the rules of the game without skipping a beat. "Helga Hufflepuff is my favourite — it's the love card; she will challenge you to do something romantic for one of the other players — kissing, touching, hugging, seven minutes beyond the veil…"

Hermione could only imagine why this was his favourite card, and if she were being honest with herself, she'd not mind it with _him_.

"If you opt out of all of these, you can choose to drink the goblet _or_ " he reached beneath the table and brought forth a wooden box,"you can smoke."

" _Smoke_? Smoke what exactly?" Alice's shrill voice brought Hermione to a memory of walking in on Fred and George smoking a wizard form of cannabis — they had offered her a hit, but she thoroughly reprimanded them for being so stupid!

"Aren't you three Aurors?" Hermione pointed at Frank, Sirius, and James.

Sirius nodded, "Yes, but as long as we aren't on the clock, we are allowed to do recreational activities...to an extent."

The witch wasn't that surprised they all smoked from time to time — still she never imagined herself in this situation, though! She was a bit reluctant, but she nodded for him to continue explaining.

"To answer your question, Ace, it's called Puffapod beans." He took out three mandrake leaves, then brought out a muslin bag of the beans. Hermione would have been lying if she said she wasn't at least interested in trying it, even if it was only one time. Watching him put the dutchie together was mesmerising, especially when he flicked out his tongue to lick the outer edge of one green leaf then the next and so on until he stuck them all together. He took out his wand and heated the leaves just to a crisp, then spread the Puffapods in a fine line and rolled it up. He set it out in front of everyone and smirked that damned arrogantly crooked smirk — "Only if you decide to opt out of all of the above," he said his voice quiet. "Then you have Slytherin — oh, the time to be cunning or loyal. Which will he choose? Salazar Slytherin will bestow a truth or a dare upon you. Decide to break, a basilisk will take you down and you're immediately kicked from the game. A Howler is one dark secret about yourself, lucky number seven is time to get naked, one female must remove one article of clothing," he was met with scoffs and a slap to his shoulder from his roommate, to which he said so quietly only she could hear, " _What? It's not like I've not seen you naked_." It sent shivers down her spine. "Number four would be us men to take off clothes; Pete, you better not get this one, again. Don't need him running around here rubbing his nipples," he said sideways toward Hermione, but loud enough for all to hear.

Peter laughed clamorously, "Shut up, Paddy! You _dared_ me!"

Sirius ignored him with a wild smile, "If you land a snitch, you are the immediate winner of the game! Easy enough?" After the chorus of "yes", Sirius clapped his hands together and said, "Let's get on with it then, shall we?"

Sirius reached for a card and flipped it over onto the table, it was Rowena. The card came to life, the woman imprinted upon the face spoke up in a velvety tone, "I am wild, I fly at night, but mostly I stay out of sight. What am I?"

"An owl flies at night, what else can I do?" Sirius asked Hermione, and waited for her to answer.

"Deliver mail. I also can eat, what meat?" she shrugged embarrassed, then looked to Alice.

"Rats. I can turn my head all the way, can I not?"

Frank laughed at his fiancées answer, "Aye. I also am used as what?"

Lily perked up, "A familiar. I will — I _will_ …"

"Come on sweetheart!" James said in the background.

" _Ugh_! I can't think of anything!" She threw her hands up laughing. "Give me the drink!"

"Ah! Boo!" Jamie ruffled Lily's hair playfully.

"I know, I know! I suck at this game."

Close to two hours later, Remus and Sirius were drunk, and without pants. James had a twisted tongue, Peter was without a shirt (rubbing his nipples frantically as per Sirius's darre), Frank had a lion's mane, Alice was high and giggly, Lily was basilisked out, and Hermione held the Snitch with a triumphant smile upon her face.

...

Hermione smiled down at the sleeping, raven-haired man on the floor. James and Remus were right next to him, using each other as a pillow. Lily tossed a blanket over them. Alice and Frank said their goodbyes. They also extended an invite to Hermione for their wedding, which she gladly accepted. Peter dipped out without saying a word. The women went to the kitchen and Hermione offered to help clean up, but Lily insisted that she didn't have to.

Lily had found that she actually liked Hermione a lot through the evening and she felt guilty for putting the charm over her, but decided not to say anything though. Everyone lives with their secrets, she just hoped this wouldn't affect their potential friendship. Hermione thanked Lily profusely for having her over and said they should get together again sometime soon; Hermione offered to take her cake tasting, which in turn made the redhead feel even more guilty — she felt cunning and not so much in a good way. She imagined James would be disappointed; she had seen how stupid he felt it was for Sirius doing basically the same thing. During these times though, with everything… the news, the war growing… one could never be sure. One thing was for certain, Hermione _could_ be trusted, Lily just needed to earn that trust in return.

"I guess I'll head back, just tell Sirius I'll see him tomorrow for me?" Hermione gathered her jacket.

Lily nodded, "Sure, you are more than welcome to stay, if you'd like to."

"No, it's all right. I sleep better in my own bed."

"Trust me, I know how that is," Lily pointed at herself. "I wanted to bring my bed from school home so badly. I had gotten used to that stupid mattress. But it was mine, you know? I had slept on it for ages… it had my indentations and… I know it sounds stupid." She rolled her eyes, dismissing her nostalgia.

 _No_. Hermione knew exactly what Lily was talking about, because she felt the same exact way when she went to school there. "I don't think so. I understand perfectly. Anyway, it's late and I am tired. You sure you don't want any help cleaning up?"

Her green eyes really were so pretty. Hermione yearned to hug the woman, to feel the closeness of the person who gave life to such an innocent soul as Harry. Lily smiled, "No it's alright, you go on! I'll make the boys do it tomorrow."

Hermione began to leave the kitchen when Lily said one more thing, "Hermione, I know it's not my place, but...Sirius is mad about you." She could see the change in Hermione's stance, but didn't want reiterate what she was thinking as it had great value and meaning to not only Sirius, "and I think that you might be into him… if you're not, that's totally great. If you _are_ , I think you should take that leap. Because otherwise, you're leading him along on an invisible string and neither of you deserve that."

….

 **A/N** : Soo, anyone up for a round of Goblet of Death? I hope you guys enjoyed his chapter! It was fun to write! Can't wait to start up on the next! Let me know what you think! I'm really feeling the love and appreciation from you guys! It's really amazing to me how much support I have received with this story! I know you guys want to see some Sirius/Hermione action, fear not! It will happen! Just need the right moment! Al the beta love for ravenclawmidwife! Xox, blue!


	14. Whispers of The Night

_"Just go! Go back to your mummy, let her make you a nice supper and tuck you into bed! I reckon you don't even know why you came out here anymore, do you?!" Harry bellowed angrily at Ron._

 _Ron turned to me and looked me up and down with resentment. He looked so angry as he spat, "So you staying here then?"_

 _I nodded, "We promised we'd help Harry, Ron. I'm not giving up! No matter how angry I may get, no matter how hungry I am, and no matter how much I miss home. We have a lot of people counting on us… I am counting on us."_

 _Ron sneered, "Yeah, right. I've seen the way the two of you look at each other. We all know why you're really here." He tore off the locket and threw it to the ground. "Better off without me, anyhow!"_

 _I could see in Ron's eyes that he regretted his decision and that it was the locket making him speak so vilely toward us; stubbornness and pride won out over his remorse. He spun around and stormed out of the tent. I looked to Harry for any word of advice, but he wasn't much help as he had put the locket around his own neck. I felt a part of my heart rip from my chest as I realised my friend wasn't coming back. I raced out of the tent after him, "Ron! Ron, please! Come back! Please we need you!" At this point I didn't care who heard me, because as long as I had my two best friends at my side, we could conquer anything… or so I thought. "I — I need you!" And I did. I needed him. He was my best friend, my brother! "Please!" I spun in a circle, looking through the trees in hopes of finding that red-headed man coming back to me, telling me he was sorry, that he was here. That it was the stupid bloody necklace that made him act the way he did. But he didn't. He was gone and I was afraid I'd never see him again. "Ron!" I screamed and crumpled to my knees begging quietly for him to please come back._

 _"Hermione? Hermione?"_

 _I didn't want to answer Harry — a part of me was angry at him, too. I shouldn't have been, it wasn't his fault that we were out here, not really. It wasn't his fault that he was wanted. It wasn't his fault there was a war. But that stupid part of my brain kept telling me that it was— because if it weren't for him, we'd not be out here in the first place._

 _"Hermione? Please, talk to me," he said, I could feel him approaching me, closer, closing in on me. "Hermione … 'Mione… hey…" his hand landed on shoulder and shook it ever so slightly. But it wasn't his hand, this hand was stronger, with a familiar tenderness. " Ace?" he said. It wasn't Harry's voice, either._

 _I furrowed my brows and turned up to this person calling for me, "Sirius?"_

 _"Ace? Wake up…"_ Sirius was kneeling beside Hermione's bed, gently shaking her.

She opened her eyes and looked up into his. Hers were blurry from sleep and tears. She sat up quickly and wiped them away with the back of her hand. She sniffed, "I'm sorry, I never used to be like this; crying over everything seems to come so naturally now."

Concerned, he asked, "Why on earth are you sorry, Ace?" He was astonished that she was so apologetic when she was the one sobbing in her sleep. "Are you okay?" It broke him when he watched her try to nod her head, but he could see the fear and sadness and the fight with herself to do so. He felt like he could — and very much wanted to — weep at the sight of her.

She could feel the weight sitting on her chest — _Gods_! Didn't he know it wasn't proper to ask woman if she wasn't okay when she very much was not? She hated it when people would ask out of pity. It actually made the situation worse. When she opened her mouth to say that she was — she hiccuped giving away her lie. " _No_ ," she answered tightly and closed her eyes. " _I_ —" her bottom lip quivered. Sirius could see the shaky frown take over her mouth. " _I miss my — my friends._ " He watched as the tip of her nose turned red. He moved from his knees and settled beside her feet. He wanted to touch her with comfort, but instead kept his hands to himself. He watched as she reached up with the sheets of her covers tried to wipe the wetness away, soaking the linen.

For the first time, Sirius could see that this woman had really gone through something terrifying… it wasn't just the brief stories that she let slip here and there. It wasn't only coming from her mouth, he could see and _feel_ her pain. Her lips were becoming chapped as she chewed at them. He wasn't sure what to do in this situation, and he kept fighting with himself not to just pull her into his lap and hold her. He reached out a shaky hand and took hold of her fingers softly. She didn't flinch or try to pull away. Instead, she turned her hand palm up and latched her fingers through his. Neither of them could make eye contact without vulnerability. They just stared at their hands until one was ready to speak.

As Sirius listened for her to steady her breaths, he studied the outlines on the back of her hand as he held it. It was so small compared to his. Dainty, yet worked. She had scars tracing her knuckles— he wondered if she had gotten into some sort of fight or possibly placed her hand into a bucket of broken glass, because these intricate details weren't so easily made. Badly, he wanted to lift up her sleeve to follow the maze of a deep, purplish scar that traced at the start of her wrist, he hadn't ever seen it before. What else hadn't he noticed?

Hermione caught him. Her already hard-thumping heart began to beat sickeningly faster when she realised what he might've been thinking. She wiggled her fingers loose and removed them from his, not quite enjoying the release.

"Do you want to talk about it?" he asked. "Tell me about them?"

"I don't really know what to say." Her shaking voice sent chills down his arms. She sniffed, then looked at the time, "Sirius, what are you doing here?"

It was the middle of the night, almost three in the morning. "I woke up and saw you weren't at James's anymore. I wanted to make sure you got home safely and when I came through the floo, I heard your… cries." He sighed, finally taking the opportunity to glance at her face.

She nodded, accepting his answer. "I'll be sure to put a silencing charm on my room for the future."

Slightly taken aback, he tilted his head to the side, "Why would you do that? If you're in pain, or sad, or hurt, let me help you."

She wanted to smile, but she just couldn't force the muscles in her face into doing so — it was so wonderfully nice of him to offer his shoulder to cry on, but this was Sirius… a man that she had lain with in a time of total recklessness, cared for, and was beginning to really like in ways she knew she wasn't supposed to. He wasn't supposed to see her like this. Or else he'd think that she was a weak, fragile pantywaist. She couldn't help what she dreamed about! She couldn't help that she missed her family, her friends, or her life, but she didn't want him to see her in her vulnerable moments. She thought back to when she knew Sirius in the nineties, and the only time he ever had seen her under duress was when Mr Weasley had been attacked. Sirius had died before she was hurt in the Ministry of Magic, and before she was tortured at Malfoy Manor. She had saved _him_ from the Dementor's kiss! If this Sirius knew all of that, he'd never think of her as a whinging child. _It's not enough. That was then and this is now, and I can't let him see me like this._

"I don't think that you could understand where I am coming from when I have these dreams." She licked her lips, turning her head away from him. She was trying her best not to let him see those damned tears that just kept falling no matter how hard she tried to keep them back.

Sirius moved closer to her. He didn't say anything, only studied her, looking at the lines of her face — far too many for her age. It reminded him of Remus in a way, though he knew that the circumstances weren't exactly the same; he'd have sniffed that out when she'd first appeared in his life. Without really thinking of the repercussions, he lifted his hands and lightly pushed with his thumbs the fallen tears from her face. She flinched at his touch, but he didn't falter, only curved his palm around her chin. She let out a scared, shuddering breath. His eyes were searching for answers — for something that she just couldn't give to him. He felt the heat of her breath, involuntarily eliciting a twitch in his lower abdomen. He wanted to kiss away the pain that she was harbouring. " _I could try._ "

Her expression softened at the tone of his voice. She reached up with her own hand and caressed the back side of his, her fingertips touching like velvet feathers. "Not tonight," she said. "I can't talk about it tonight."

He nodded in understanding, "Whenever you're ready, I am here."

She didn't say anything; she didn't have to. His kindness to her was silently acknowledged. He moved to leave, but her hand grabbed his arm. She swallowed her pride and pushed away her fear. "Would you… don't feel like you have to. _Could you_ …" her head dipped down to the floor. He could see her spiraling down all over again.

" _Yes_ ," he whispered, then removed his shoes and jacket, tossing the latter to the back of Hermione's desk chair. He crawled over her feet and to the second pillow and laid down facing her. She turned the light from her lamp off and slid her hand in between their bodies, with her other arm nestled beneath the pillow. Sirius did the same; their pinkies intertwined.

" _Thank you_ ," Hermione whispered.

He took a deep breath, holding back all of his questions. "Sure, Ace. Anything." His grip tightened around her pinky.

"Promise?" she asked.

At this, Sirius understood the depth of Hermione's vulnerability. Tomorrow, she'd either pretend this had never happened or she would berate herself for everything and pull away again. That wasn't what he wanted. He didn't know how to answer her question. Why would he make a promise that he knew she wouldn't allow him to keep? He was caught between a rock and a hard place — did he want to keep that promise? Hell, yes. Would it hurt him if she made him break it? Completely. Was it really up to her, though? Was it her decision on whether or not Sirius would do anything for her? Could she hold him back from doing so? He knew if he said yes to her, it could undo whatever progress had occurred between them. But if he said no… he could keep her. He felt his face contour and hoped the shadows didn't give anything away. If you want me to in the morning, yes, he wanted to say. Then he heard a quiet hum come from the woman lying beside him. She moved only slightly; her eyes were closed and she was fast asleep.

….

The sun broke through the shades, tendrils of light lavishing their entangled bodies. Sheets were wrapped around Sirius's naked leg. His arm was thrown over the bare skin of her waist, fingers tucked beneath her back, his nose buried in the crevice of her neck. Her hair was splayed across the pillow, with her knee tucked between his thighs, and a hand draped over his shoulder.

 _It was his turn for nightmares. He had been having them ever since he had killed those Death Eaters at the attack on the Weasley's home. Unlike Hermione, when he slept, he'd place a silencing charm upon his room or wherever he'd stay—upon himself. That night he had forgotten to do so._

 _Hermione awoke to hands grabbing for her, pulling at her nightshirt with terrifying strength. Sirius's eyes were closed, his forehead glistened with sweat and his teeth were bared. He was groaning out "no" and curses. She couldn't reach the lamp and the moon was the only light illuminating the situation._

 _"Sirius…" she placed her hands over his, carefully pulling his fingers from her seams. "Sirius, wake up." With her free hand, she placed it upon his cheek and caressed it softly, "Wake up."_

 _A growl emerged from deep in his throat, low and threatening. For half a second, she wasn't sure if he'd attack her in his sleep. "Sirius!" she called with anneal strength behind her voice. She was sitting up now, her face hovered over his. His grey eyes tore open with a heavy blue tracing them. She watched as his pupils focused on her; the small specks gradually grew larger the longer he looked at her. He let go of her, his gaze following his loose hand, staring past his fingers at the buttons of her flannel. Without thinking, he grabbed ahold of the material and pulled her into a rough, searing kiss._

 _At first, her mouth didn't move —from surprise, he suspected— then her lips danced back against his, hungrily. He lunged forward without taking his lips from hers and rounded her to her back. She stared up at the shadow of him, sated — confused. He pushed himself against her once more, the hardness within his jeans pressed between her legs, as he held himself over her with one hand beside her shoulder and the other grasping her curls between his fingers. It wasn't like the first time they had been together; this was furious, bruising, and desperate._

 _Hermione touched Sirius's chest, pressing her nails gently into the cotton of his t-shirt. He took her breath, as if she were giving him life with every twist and turn of his tongue. He nipped at her lip; she gasped as he pulled away and began to scrape the edges of his teeth against her jaw._

 _She purred into his ear and ran her fingernails over the back of his neck, as the other hand grasped his denim waistband._

 _He moaned — beginning to feel a little bit dizzy. His hands journeyed down her abdomen and beneath her shirt. It was a strange sensation, something more than simple pleasure. The palm of his hand grabbed her lower back, and he heaved her against him. She let out a soft mewl. His tongue flicked against the lobe of her ear, "Tell me to stop, Ace."_

 _She shook her head, "N-no. Don't."_

 _He stilled himself. He wanted to make sure it wasn't his mind making it all up. "Come again?"_

 _Hermione leaned up onto her elbows and placed featherlight kisses against his chin, "I said,_ don't _stop."_

 _He smiled. She could see his teeth gleaming from the dim light passing through the window. He straddled her legs, settling just enough weight upon her pelvis bone to tease her core. She threw her head back against the pillow, grasping it with her hand as the thumb of her other was being held between her teeth. She closed her eyes at the pressure, the pleasure. His thumbs and forefingers nimbly began to unbutton her shirt, the air touching her skin, leaving goosebumps in its wake._

 _He bent down and kissed just above the edge of her pants and licked all the way up as each button was released. Her skin was sweet like a nectarine. He reached just beneath her ribcage and took the skin between his teeth and bit her, slaying her defenses with pleasure and pain._

 _Sirius had been waiting on this moment for what felt like forever — and he wanted to make it right, different from the first time. As he reached her breast, he felt the soft peak of her nipple over his tongue, and bit it gently. She moaned and wrapped her hand into his hair, forcing his mouth to suckle her harder. He reached down with the other hand and pushed it beneath her night pants. He coursed two fingers deep inside of her, and felt as her body clenched with his every thrust._

 _Hermione reached around him and tugged the back of his shirt up — realising what she was doing, he leaned up and helped her by pulling it from his head and tossing it to the floor. He brought the fingers he had inside of her to his lips and sucked them. Her eyes widened when he popped the second one from his mouth._

 _She very much wanted to touch him, and was relieved when he grabbed her wrists to place her hands upon his stomach; she felt every line of every indentation of his muscles. She traced them with her fingertips as he watched her._

 _After shimmying her pants and knickers off, he finally gave in and released himself from his tight jeans. Their naked skin against each other felt almost electric. The moon had moved away, giving barely any light into the room now — it was just the two of their bodies playing in the darkness of the night, blindly learning one another._

 _Sirius swiped his hands between her legs and against the apex of her thighs, feeling the thickness of her warmth gathering all over again, stickying his fingers. He gripped her forcefully at her hips, and pressed himself against her, teasingly. She reached down to touch, to put him inside of her, but was met with chuckling and that low growl… "Not yet, Ace."_

 _"Mm, Sirius… please." She could hardly believe the words coming from her mouth. She could hardly believe she let herself be in this position — again._

 _He couldn't believe that she allowed it._

 _Neither would deny it; neither would say: He was her sin. She was his vice._

 _"What you want me to do to you?"_

 _She shakily sighed. What did she want him to do to her? It was embarrassing to say aloud — women weren't supposed to talk… dirty. At least, that's how she was raised. But that was in her past, wasn't it? And this was now, and he was Sirius Black — a man that made her feel like she was the only one in command._

 _His erection laid hot against her belly. He leaned down and kissed her neck, softly pulling her hair. She turned to the heat of his breath. He captured her lips within his own and rhythmically touched the skin of her arms. She pulled her legs up on either side of him, pressing the soles of her feet upon his calves._

 _He smirked and moved his cock down the length of her sex and traced the opening in rotation. He waited for her legs to squeeze around him before he'd make his next move. He felt her writhe beneath him, her legs moved rapidly up and down— her feet pushing the sheets from the bed. He'd never asked for her to give voice to her desires— he wanted to feel them._

 _Hermione mewled with angst when finally she clawed his chest and pushed him over to his back as she straddled his hips. "This, Sirius. I want this."_

He took a slow deep breath at the memory, inhaling her earthy scent. It was a surprise to see she was still nestled against his body. She was sleeping so soundly, he was afraid if he moved, she'd wake. The colour of her lips was so enticing, the animagus in him yearned to make her red with blush. He felt his cock twitch when he looked down at the open display of her breasts, but it suddenly dithered when he saw something he hadn't noticed the first time they had been together. Something he was sure he had not felt beneath his fingertips or lips when he touched and kissed every inch of her body last night.

 _Scars_.

Horrible, rigid scars traced her peachy skin. Then he remembered the scars he seen seen on her fingers and wrist. That same wrist was currently hiding beneath the pillow. He sat up as gently as he could without disturbing her and leant closer to her naked form. A long, purplish scar started from beneath her breast and trailed down to the edge of the bottom of her rib cage. It was edged in tendrils that resembled spider-webs — she had been hit by a nasty curse and from what he could tell, it had been some time ago. However, with these types of cursed indentations, there were only temporary glamours that could cover them. He continued to study the part of her body that wasn't half-covered with the white sheet. Sirius then found a long, thin gash scar that hid beneath her chin and down the length of her neck — _a cursed blade_. There was no mistaking it; It was newer, still pink.

Hermione moved slightly in her sleep, turning to her side. Sirius could see the goose-flesh inching up her skin. He furrowed his brows in curiosity and concern, but moved to pull the duvet back over her cooling body. Perhaps he would talk to her about it later. Perhaps he'd keep it a secret as she has done. _What aren't you telling me, Hermione?_ He smoothed her hair and pulled her closer, hugging her with a protective strength he hadn't known he had inside of him.


	15. Smilin' Out Of Fear

Narcissa stood before the elongated mirror staring at the deep blue dress that was chosen for her by her mother. It was shorter than most of the dresses that were chosen for her. It showed off her ankles. The light peeking through the window shined over the sequins. She really wanted to hate it, but the dress was very beautiful. She was readying herself for the monthly dinner for all the royalty. Her small elf came rustling in with a silver tray and shining gemstones upon it. "My lady… Siggy has chosen the most precious of jewels for you." The grey, gangly creature held the tray up high above her head as she bowed deeply.

Narcissa smiled and turned to her help. "Thank you, Siggy."

The elf set the tray down on the vanity and pulled the seat for the woman. The blonde sat down before the smaller mirror and stared now at her face. She looked happy enough, she supposed. She was wearing a pretty pink on her lips that seemed to make her smile look real and her eyes were shining bluer with the help of the colouring of her dress. Siggy casted a spell over Narcissa's head and placed her locks into soft waves. "Do you like this hair, my lady? Or shall Siggy try again."

Narcissa turned her head back and forth, touching lightly and observing. "I do, it's rather vintage, add a band."

Siggy took a crystal headband and placed it over Narcissa's hair. Siggy then reached for a necklace jeweled in crystals in the shape of a dragonfly and put it around her lady's neck. "My. This is beautiful," Narcissa complimented the gleaming piece.

The elf's wide eyes blinked in satisfaction, "I thought so as well. Lady Narcissa always looks her best."

"Of course, as you always dress me right." Narcissa reached for the satin gloves and rolled them up her arms. "Shall I wear a bracelet?"

Siggy eyed the woman's apparel seriously, with a bony finger touching her chin in thought, then shook her head, "No. Less is more. Would my lady like help placing her shoes?"

"No. That will be all, thank you, Siggy," Narcissa dismissed the elf. She went back to the standing mirror. She did love the dress, she only hoped that Lucius would, too. She pressed her hands across her waist, fingering the glittered edges when a knock at her door came.

"You may enter," she said sweetly.

Her mother came striding in, dressed in a dark emerald green. "Mother, you look lovely," Narcissa said, kissing each of the woman's cheeks.

Druella's black hair fell around her face. "As do you, Narcissa. I thought the blue would look appealing on you. I was right."

The younger woman wasn't surprised. As harsh as her mother could be, she always wanted her children to look their best. "Thank you. You chose well. Do you like the necklace?"

Druella's cold hands grasped the ornament around her daughters neck and eyed it peculiarly. "It'll do. I like the sapphires for the eyes." She dropped it back to Narcissa neck, the cold of the woman's hands lingering. "I came to talk to you on an important matter."

Narcissa raised her brows only slightly enough to not appall her mother into berating her about wrinkles. The young woman offered Druella the seat to her vanity as she herself sat on the edge of her bed. She could only imagine what Mother had to say and to be perfectly honest, she didn't want to hear it. "What is it? Is all well?"

"Your Aunt Walburga has informed me that Regulus may have found a suitable match." She knew this already, and found it funny. "Which means you have been left into the arms of no one. If this woman falls through, you and Regulus will of course resume the engagement. However, if it does not, we are unsure what to do with you. The Lestrange's were quick to find a match for the young Rabastan. Ellen Greengrass… the younger sister of the twins Marcella and James Greengrass. She just finished at Hogwarts."

This was music to Narcissa's ears! It was an excellent opportunity to ask for the hand of Lucius Malfoy. She could forget her plans of running away and marrying him! She could finally have her parent's blessing! Oh, such wonderful news. " _Mother_!" she cried out, clapping her hands together.

Druella knew what the next words out of her daughter's mouth would be before they were even spoken. "Do _not_ say Lucius Malfoy. He is not good enough for you or the family," she scolded.

The young woman's heart pounded with anger and her hands began to shake. She definitely couldn't mistake the queasy feeling she felt at the pit of her stomach. "I do not understand," she began, "He's the only heir to his family's fortune. Just because Abraxas Malfoy and Father have had disagreements in the past doesn't mean that Lucius is the same way as his own father," Narcissa defended. "And if I'm not mistaken, but you were once close to Lady Isabel… that could be a rekindled friendship."

Druella rolled her eyes. "There is more to the story than disagreements and lost friendships, Narcissa. You had a silly relationship in school, much to your father's displeasure, but as you were young he allowed it because he knew that it wouldn't last. I am not discussing this with you. Obviously, as you can very well see, Lucius isn't even betrothed to anyone, and he's of the age twenty-five… no one wants to be wed to that family as they do not stick to the old ways. Which is what the wizarding community needs. Something you clearly do not understand."

"He's not betrothed to anyone because he _wants_ to marry me, Mother. Not because he isn't right for anyone. And you speak as if his age has him rolling in his grave already." The blonde stood from her bed. "Times are changing. We can't continue to live in the past."

Druella stood as tall as her youngest, "We will until we absolutely can't anymore. You will not speak to me in that tone, young lady. I would rather marry you off to Jacob Nott before I pair you to Lucius Malfoy." She fixed the fingertips of her own satin gloves, then looked back to her daughters blue eyes, "As the Notts are the lowest above the Weasleys in the Pureblood community, I am doing you an honour and a favour." She made her way to the door and just as her hand reached the brass knob, she was stopped in her steps.

"I'm not even a true Black," Narcissa said in a calm demur, her nostrils flared as she stared disgustingly at her mother.

The woman appalled, turned to Narcissa with surprise and purple outrage. Her red lips were curved into a perfect sneer, "Whatever are you playing at, child?"

Narcissa crossed her arms casually. "Oh, don't act like you don't know, Mother, as you spread your legs wide as an eagle's wings." She gestured with her own arms wide to her sides.

Druella strode over to the twenty-three year old and smacked her directly across her cheek, leaving a deep, stinging welt.

Narcissa stepped back and jutted out a sour laugh. "You act as if I don't know. I know your secret. I don't even look like Cygnus. Or my sisters. I've known for years. Bellatrix and Andromeda know as well. They are the ones who found the adoption paperwork ages ago."

Druella's face was as red as freshly dropped blood. "You _insolent_ little—"

" _Rowle_. Is that what you were going to say?" Narcissa knew she had her mother by the reins now. Oh yes, she knew all about the five month affair Druella Black had with the man twenty-three years ago.

Bella and Andy had told her after they were playing in their mother's chest of old clothes; they had found a secret compartment tucked inside of the shabby chest. At first, Narcissa thought they were just fooling around as they always had, but she knew it to be true when Andromeda withdrew the document stating the facts. Of course, Narcissa didn't want to believe it at as her own father, Cygnus, loved her so very much… but it had made sense after she had met Mr Rowle in passing at a dinner one evening during a Summer holiday back in third year. Mr Rowle had bright blond hair he wore back in a braid; he was tall, masculine, and had steely blue eyes. He was opposite of her adoptive father's dark features.

Narcissa remembered that parchment like the back of her hand as she had studied it for hours, upon days, slightly yellowed with age, written in a beautiful scrawl:

 _ **Adoption**_.

 _This document gives the pledge that **Mr Cygnus Eridanus Black** will honour and nurture with fatherly duties to the innocence of the child **Narcissa Belle** born and given to him on **5 August 1955** by not the seed of him, but through the magick of a Marriage Bond to **Druella Black neè Rosier.** **Mr Cygnus Erdanus Black** is now and forever bound to this decree by blood and magick._

"So tell me again, Mother… how can you or father deny me Lucius Malfoy?" She basked in the glorious surprise of her mother's face. It had been ten long years of keeping that secret tightly between she and her sisters; ten long years of waiting for the perfect moment to strike.

Druella chuckled darkly, "By rights you are Cygnus Black's child. He adopted you under a magical decree, Narcissa. You _are_ his. Why do you think we only ever see Petyr at big events such as today and are no longer invited to personal affairs? Because he was placed under an order of oath and command that you are not his daughter and will never know you as such."

"Well, I can't believe daddy ever took you back. You are slimy and gross and you don't deserve his love," she spat. "Now, please, excuse me. I need to finish getting ready for the Bazaar."

Her mother scoffed maliciously, "This isn't close to being the end of this discussion, darling girl. And don't for a minute think that you can marry Lucius. If you do, you will lose out on this family. You will lose everything. You will be shut out as Andromeda." The black haired woman walked easily to the door and said, " _Trust_ me, that is not what you want," and made her exit, closing it quietly behind her.

That's what was always so troublesome about this family. Always putting on a face for the world to see, never knowing the darkest of secrets that laid behind the masks. " _You have no idea, Druella Black. Not a one_ ," Narcissa said, just above a whisper.

….

His fingertips were further blackened with each new stroke against the parchment. He worked without realizing the many details he'd put into the sketch he made of her hands. The fine lines on her palm flowed out of his brain through his medium, joining the scars that had troubled him as he'd made his study of her skin this morning. He blew back a tendril of dark hair that fell across his face. His brow, arched thoughtfully as he analyzed the lines that marred her delicate hands, trying to puzzle out how each mark had come to be. He knew that Hermione was clumsy, as he'd seen her fall a time or two, tripping over her own feet. But the intricate detail of the more obviously Dark Magic-induced spiderwebs across her ribs wasn't due to the imbalance of her toes, or the twisting of shower curtains. He recalled seeing her naked that first time, but he didn't recall the scars. Had he really seen her then? Had he been blinded with lust and by the hunger of sex to be so indifferent to the angry blemishes upon her body?

Sirius kept circling back to the same few awful possibilities — abuse, combat, torture… the curve of her wrist fell into her forearm, then into her shoulder and he began drawing the line of her neck, where another, newer scar decorated her skin. As he thought about it, he'd never even seen that one before either: the witch must excel in glamour charms and feel heavily justified in not wanting him to see her naked on a regular basis.

He set the charcoal down, closing the sketch book, and wiped his hand over his t-shirt. He rubbed the bridge of his nose and spread his fingers to his temples, pressing firmly to release the tension that had built. He knew it'd be best if he just asked her about them. She was going through obviously deep measures to keep him from knowing, but he knew now. Especially with how she was when she had finally awoken that morning; pulling the sheets around her body and racing to the loo without a thought, word, or look to him. He had taken that as a sign of his overstayed welcome. He waited on her, but she never came back to his arms. It had been hours since they had even seen each other. He was sure she was engaged in another fight with herself for what she had done with him. However, the sincerity of her actions, and enthusiasm, during the night spoke volumes. Still, with their past, it'd come as no surprise to Sirius if she ended up breaking him down all over again.

The only sound was the air conditioning turning on, bringing to his attention that the flat was too quiet. He slipped from his room and stalked over to her closed, and probably locked, bedroom. He knocked and no answer came from within. He knocked again, he could feel her presence behind the door. "Ace?" His hand slid down to the handle and twisted.

….

 _Hermione woke to the warmth of his arms wrapped around her; a choking need for security and caution obstructed her airways and she was compelled to remove herself from the situation immediately. Not minding that she'd wake the sleeping man, she covered with the sheet completely and rolled from beneath his arms. She heard him say, "Herm—" before she slammed the bathroom door behind her. She reached back and locked it then grabbed the counter, whitening her knuckles from the strength she put forth. Her overlay fell into a puddle around her feet, and a spurt of anger incurred within for her lack of forethought. Her eyes were drawn to the scar that scraped her forearm, the ugly, cursed scripture chiseled deep into her skin. Mudblood — put there by the one and only Bellatrix Lestrange, Sirius's cousin. It made her sick. Made her feel dirty, just what the evil witch wanted._

 _She'd been so smart with covering them until now, and had actually gone through exceptional lengths into procuring a long-term glamour to keep the noticeable scars hidden; she'd taught Fleur and herself after her torture at Malfoy Manor. Hermione should've realised it was time to renew the charm when the small ones were beginning to show across her hands — but she was too preoccupied with him, and not focusing on what she should've been doing. Protecting herself! Protecting the future! Instead, I was sleeping with Sirius Black…_

 _The woman sat on the toilet seat for a while and listened, awaiting Sirius's departure from her room. When she heard the door shut, she tiptoed to get her wand. Before she went, a tapping and an owl appeared at her window. It was Regulus's mail carrier. Not taking the time to read the letter just now, she took the envelope and placed it on her desk. Back inside the bathroom, she pressed the tip of her vinewood upon her skin and whispered the incantation. She watched with anticipation as the marred skin covered itself with invisible patches. That's when it hit her: an ugly bout of vertigo. She almost lost her footing when a gulp of nausea spread through her stomach. Sweat beaded over her forehead, one hand slipped from the counter and her wand from the other. Pressing against the cool wall, she steadied herself and walked into the bedroom. With slow, bated breaths, she reached the chest of drawers and pulled out only knickers and a t-shirt. The cool material felt great against her burning skin. Her vision became blurry and her throat tightened, she couldn't call out for help. She didn't even make it to the bed and fell to the floor. She knew what it was, she read about it in one of the many books she bought. Time Travel; The Good, the Bad, the Ugly. Chapter Eight; Page 765: Time Warping of the Body. It'd be a slow process, it would be gradual and over a considerable period of time, but if she didn't eventually leave — she'd die._

 _She laid there for hours, in and out of consciousness, reflecting on the plans she needed to fulfill. She counted, but couldn't get past twenty… Each time she'd get her mind to working, it'd break down all over again. She needed to get to a hospital. She needed to get back to 1998…_

" _Ace_?" Sirius opened the door, " _Hermione_! — _Hermione_ …" his voice garbled, her ears went deaf. She reached out weakly to him, but felt the material of his shirt slip right between her fingers. _Pretty eyes… such pretty blue eyes…_


	16. She Carries Her Own Truth

The morning had been a quick and busy one. By the time he had returned home, Regulus was expected to be at the Bazaar in thirty minutes. He needed to invite Hermione to dinner for that week still, in hopes that she'd agree to helping him; he believed she'd be willing to play a part in his ruse, but it was a lot to ask of her. He wrote to her and sent off the letter in a hurry. The only problem he could see with their situation would arise once Hermione arrived into their home; Kreacher would know the lack of purity in Hermione's blood. It still amazed him that the evil little thing could detect blood purity just by the scent of a Witch or Wizard. The magic of house elves was undervalued, unappreciated, and misunderstood by many who wouldn't put the time into learning it.

Hermione had told Regulus Kreacher was under oath to him, which came as a surprise; he'd never really paid any mind to the servant, until after the revelation of the Witch's past. Perhaps now would be the time he needed to command the elf into his trust.

However doing so could prove problematic, as Kreacher is almost always at Walburga Black's ear, and while the elf wasn't spewing Regulus's everyday doings anymore, he was sure something would come up. Kreacher might question his motives as well, but he'd cross that path when he got to it.

"Kreacher!" With a sudden pop! the elf appeared inside Regulus's room. "Young Master Regulus called for Kreacher? Does Master Regulus need help getting ready for the party?"

Regulus observed the servant,instantly irate that the thing would betray his —though estranged — brother in the future. He wanted to kill Kreacher here and now. He twisted his sneer into a calmer demeanor. "Kreacher, I need to know if you are willing to make a vow to me."

The eyes of the creature widened, but he nodded, "Of course, Master Regulus. Kreacher lives and breathes to service you and all the others of the Noble House Of Black."

Regulus smirked at the line. He stood from his chair and began to pace the length of his room. "I want you to vow to me that you will obey me… _forever_. No matter the situation, no matter what anyone asks of you, no matter if I am dead and just a portrait on the wall — I need you to promise me that you will never betray my trust, you will never betray me and you will keep my secrets and that no matter what, you _will_ always come back to me," Regulus said firmly before reaching out an arm for the Unbreakable Vow.

Kreacher's ears flopped and he began to fiddle his grey fingers at the sight of the offered hand, "Kreacher vows no matter the circumstance to the House of Black, Master Regulus. But Kreacher _mustn't_ …" he tilted his nose at the limb.

Crossing his arms now, the man stood even taller. "Why? Do you believe you will break an oath?" He stared down, his anger flaring up again.

The elf shook his head frantically, "No, no, no. Kreacher lives to service The Ancient and Noble House Of Black, Master Regulus… Mistress Walburga made Kreacher make the same promise…" his ears twitched, a sign of his disloyalty.

Regulus grinned and dropped his arms, "You can have the same oath with more than one person, Kreacher. Were you told otherwise?"

The elf nodded.

"I thought so. You live to serve every individual of the House of Black. You have no prejudice toward any of us. You can live and breathe the regulations by which your Mistress gives to you, but you can't break an oath to another wizard of the same house. You just simply have no way of speaking of me to her anymore, aside from the necessary— she can no longer know what I don't want her to know. Which makes this whole situation all the better… you can't tell Walburga anything about me, because I command you to not tell her anything aside from the normal everyday routine. Which is: Master Regulus gets up, eats, dresses, and goes about his day as he would any other day. Does this make sense to you, Kreacher?" Regulus held out his hand once more. "Do we have a deal?"

Kreacher looked back and forth as if he were reading a book, then nodded reluctantly, his ears twitching as he thought the precautions over in his head. He bowed then took Regulus' arm into his wobbly hand and placed the strings of the Unbreakable Vow over them and this wasn't warm nor satisfying like it had been with Hermione. This was cold, bitter, and untrusting. Kreacher barely made eye contact with his master when he brought back his arm and knitted fingers together.

Regulus wanted to comment on it, but thought otherwise. He needed to make sure the elf thought he was on his side. So he smiled, "Good. First things first, the Witch I have invited to dinner — she is a Muggleborn. Keep it to yourself."

The elf's eyes widened and he placed his bony hand against his chest in panic. "You will bring shame upon us, Master Regulus! _Shame! Shame! Shame!_ You mustn't make me keep this secret, Master Regulus! No! No!" He began hitting his head with open palms. " _Cantkeepsecret_!" he said through his teeth.

Regulus wanted to keep the elf at hitting himself as punishment for the turn he takes in the future. He let a few more beatings ensue then stopped it — he needed the respect, though it be little.

"Good thing you promised and my shame is all in secret."

"It's wrong, Master Regulus. So _very, very_ wrong."

….

Everything was fast paced and blurred after he wrapped Hermione's frame within his arms. He could hardly remember stepping into the floo, feeling sick over leaving the woman alone for even a moment, afraid she'd die. " _Lily!_ " Sirius yelled out in a panic, guilt straining his voice, not taking a step away from the fireplace.

Lily Evans came racing down the stairs, " _Sirius!?_ What is it!" She ran up to him, her hair in a towel. She noticed right away that something was the matter and her first thought was of James.

He could barely catch his breath, _"Hermione —sick, dying… help please."_ Before she could even ask what happened, he was back inside the floo, grabbing Lily's wrist to come along with him, barefoot and the towel falling from her red hair and into a pile before the hearth. As they landed in his lounge, he raced into Hermione's room with Lily following close behind.

Sirius had Hermione lying in her bed now. The roots of her hair drenched, the pillow puddled with her sweat, the t-shirt became sheer. All the blankets were removed except for the fitted sheet around the mattress, which was soaking as well. "What's happening?" He was on the bed now beside the sick witch, pushing her frizzy hair away from her face. Her eyes kept moving frantically behind her lids and only showing the whites of them when she did open them.

Lily hadn't ever seen anything like this and she has been studying to become a Healer since leaving Hogwarts. "Sirius, I need you to calm down," she said sternly to her friend. "What happened? Do you know if she's eaten anything? I don't think it's poison… " She bent down beside the sick witch and counted her pulse.

 _Poison!?_ Sirius took a deep breath and ran his hands over his face. "I don't know. I…" he then noticed her wrist that had the scars just that morning. They were gone. Without a second thought, he reached for the hem her shirt and began to pull it up.

" _Whoa… whoa!_ Sirius!" Lily lunged forward and pulled his hands away from Hermione's clothing. "Look, I understand that you two may have something… but that doesn't give you the right to go pulling off her clothes, especially when she's unconscious!" Her green eyes went wide with surprise.

"No… no. I wasn't." He knew better of telling the woman Hermione's secrets. For that, Hermione would never forgive. They weren't his to tell, or to even know… " _Lil_?" He begged with his eyes for answers.

"I don't know, love. Listen, we need to get her to the hospital. Can you take the anti-apparition wards from the flat? Because we need to get her there immediately. She is losing a lot of fluids and she is very hot." Lily removed her hand from Hermione's forehead. "If we don't get her the proper medicines, she could become very dehydrated, and whatever is happening, the outcome doesn't look very good unless we get her there fast. Do you understand, Sirius?" She tried to say it as lightly as she could without further freaking him out.

He stared at the pale Hermione… he was queasy, his hands were clammy. After a moment, he nodded, never removing his eyes from her. "I can do that."

….

Narcissa held a goblet between her hands while she stared off into the grounds full of people. She always loved the Bazaars — beautiful, full of great fun, and it was a time that people came together without acting like total sods, well… mostly. Her Mother and Father were off in the distance, putting on a fair show and talking loudly — probably about their generous donations to Hogwarts over the years. To the right, she sought her handsome cousin Regulus… he was talking with lads of his age, a smile or two crossed his lips which was nice and a lovely change. She began walking alone on the outskirts of the party when her waist was touched with familiar hands. She nearly dropped her drink when she turned to the face she knew and loved so much. " _Lucius_!"

He smirked down at her and pulled her close, giving her a daring hug and whispered into her ear, "You look lovely, my darling. How are you?"

She wrapped her hand over his cheek, "Oh, just wonderful now that you are here. You look very smart. I like the hair." During school he had wore it back and long, but it was now clipped short and a bit longer on top. His smile was absolutely dashing and she swore it was one of the many reasons she loved him so.

"Thank you." He couldn't stop looking down at her; she made him the happiest bloke in their world. "Shall we walk? I feel it's been ages since I've had you in my presence,." he asked, taking her hand from his cheek and folding her fingers through his.

Her smile barely dropped, she couldn't help but be so happy with him. "Mm, I'd absolutely love to. But I don't want to cause you any more trouble than you are already in," she said, glancing toward her parents. Druella looked ready to rip through the field to hang her daughter by her hair.

Lucius chuckled, "I'm in no trouble, darling. Your Mother's words are nothing but raindrops on a rain cloak." He winked, "Nevertheless, I don't want you to deal with any scrutiny. I've missed you. I'd like to see you soon." He pulled her face between his hands and pressed a sweet, chaste kiss to her lips. "Tell me when we can."

Pulling in a deep breath, she collected herself, "I've been under lock and key since the engagement has been broken with Mr Lestrange. They want me to marry Regulus…but even he has found someone, apparently. So, they are talking of pairing me with Jacob Nott!"

Lucius smirked, "Don't worry. You won't be marrying Nott, I can swear to you on that, sweet one. We will be together. You _will_ be my wife."

Narcissa's heart went aflutter. "Oh, how I love you so!"

"I love you," he said back, his words barely interrupted when Druella came walking up.

" _Lucius_ ," she greeted coldly.

"Lady Black, how do you do?" he answered politely, placing his hands behind his back as a perfect gentleman would.

"I'd do better if you weren't over here trying to seduce my daughter. Why are you even here to begin with?" Druella took a Goblet from one of the passing elves' trays.

The man continued to smile, "My family was invited as we have _always_ been."

Druella rolled her eyes as if she couldn't believe it. "You're only commiting a social suicide, Mr Malfoy. I rather think that would tarnish your reputation even more so. Perhaps you should leave before it gets out to everyone you are here."

Lucius stared at his lover's Mother until he finally answered. It was very obvious he wanted to say more than he should, but he held it back with dignity. "You are absolutely right, Lady Black. My apologies." He took Narcissa's hand and kissed over the satin. "Until next time."

Narcissa's heart swelled and her chest hurt. "Good day to you, Lucius."

He held her sparkling blue eyes with his own, giving to her all of his love, "And to you, My Lady."

….

Lily was changed into a lime green uniform and finally had shoes on her feet, her hair pulled back and she had a chart in her hands. She, Sirius, and Hermione had been in the hospital for well over three hours now. Lily had told the in-house Healers that she'd like to work alongside them as Hermione was a friend — this had also give her leeway into knowing the details of Hermione's ongoing condition and treatment, so she could relay it to Sirius, as he wasn't any form of contact to Hermione.

Hermione was stable now, sleeping, and hooked to up to IV's for replenishing from the dehydration — this, however, wasn't told to Sirius as only a Muggleborn witch or wizard was able to receive that type of care.

 _"The proper spell isn't working, Evans! Are you a hundred percent she is Pureblood?" Healer Stevens asked hurriedly._

 _Lily shook her head, "In all honesty, sir — I only just met her this week… I thought she was, as her grandfather was Hector Dagworth-Granger, sir."_

 _He nodded, "Right — order a blood type & purity test as well as next of Kin; also send for Healer Clarkson, he's on the second floor."_

 _Within twenty minutes, the blood test was ran, Hermione Granger was determined Muggleborn, but the cause of her case was still in question._

 _This can't be right_ , Lily thought; a feeling of nauseating dread pooled inside of her as she read the chart over and over again:

 **Name** : _Hermione Granger_

 **D.O.B** : _Undetermined (?)_

 **Blood Type** : _Muggleborn_

 **Next of Kin** : _Regulus Black_

 **Healer** : _Robert Stevens_ accompanied by _Harold Clarkson_ and _Lily Evans_

" _When can I see her?_ " She barely heard him ask, not tearing her eyes from the clipboard in front of her. "Lil?" he asked again. She was biting at her lip and strained to take her eyes away from what she was reading.

" _What_? I'm sorry, Sirius…" she held the board tight against her chest. This was concerning, Lily never acted so spacy unless something was terribly important… and though Hermione was just that to him, she wasn't to Lily, not in that way. Normally Lily would be comforting but she could barely keep her attention set. "I asked when I could see her."

She closed her eyes and shook her head, then looked up into her friend's sorrow, "It won't be for some time, love. They are doing treatments now… but I assure you, we are bringing her to health. She is in good hands."

That wasn't the answer he was looking for. "Can't you do something? Tell them I am her flatmate… I see her everyday… we are friends… she hasn't anyone here."

At this, her head felt as if it were going to explode. "I know. How about you use the floo to firecall James and Remus… I'm sure she'd love to see Remus when she wakes. Also, run down to the shop, grab some flowers… stay busy, I promise you when the time comes for you to see her, I will let you know. You know I will."

He reluctantly nodded, "You'd tell me if something were wrong, right?"

She swallowed and hated lying to him. She reached out her hand and squeezed his, "Of course." She forced a smile on her lips. He ran a hand through his hair. She watched as he stalked away and once he was out of sight, she slowly went back to Hermione's room and looked in on her through the window. She was sleeping soundly, waters dripped fast through the tube into her veins. Her eyes scanned the chart again. " _Who are you, Hermione Granger?"_


	17. Dangerous To Know

_She could feel his arms holding her for dear life. His fear thudded through his chest so hard that she couldn't count the beats of his heart. She tried to open her eyes, only to have a magnificent weight holding them closed. His warmth was just too much — too much…_ "Nnn—… _" she made herself moan. Her body was hot, she felt him stripping the blankets from her bed, then he was gone._

 _It was quiet._

"Ssss…" _she tried to call for him, but the words couldn't leave her lips. The pain arced through her spine, her fever spiked so high that a normal human being would be dead._ Come back… _her thoughts whispered out to him. She hadn't a clue how long he was gone for or that she was out again until she heard his strained voice entering and the weight of his body settling on the bed beside her frantically. She tried to turn to him, when she heard another voice. Familiar, frightened, yet calm. Lily — she was holding Hermione's wrist now. The voices were steady… Sirius was gone again,_ where did he go?

 _Suddenly she was held by him again, they were spinning— vertigo, nausea — shouting!… she's taken from Sirius —_ no! _— placed in a bed, rushed — oh the voices;_ loud! _Painful… Ringing inside her ears!_

 _She grits her teeth and tries to scream, but no sound is present. New hands,_ whose hands are these? _She feels her clothes being torn from her body, the cool air prickling at her skin. It hurts. She feels magic touching her, draining her; it's not working… her inner consciousness closes off… it's black, silence._

 _Slow deep breaths…_ steady _…_ one, two, three…

 _"She's coming to,"_ someone says.

 _"Hermione?"_ another speaks.

 _She feels coldness running in her veins. One, two, three… her ears are cleared, she can hear the footsteps outside of her room — unfamiliar,_ where am I? _Her eyes still shut, her body so tired… "Hermione Granger?"_

Perhaps just a nap would do _, she thinks… her head lolls down the pillow —_

It's hours later, she wakes. Groggily, she blinks away the sleep from her eyes, staring into the dimmed _hospital_ room. Coming to the realization, she looks to her arm and finds an IV spello-taped and tucked inside the hospital gown. She barely noticed the body in the chair sitting beside her when she turned. Bringing up her free hand, she held it against her chest, " _Ginny_?" Her throat stung when she spoke.

Lily looked confused, upset… angry, even. " _Hermione…_ you're at St. Mungo's Hospital. You have fallen ill. How are you feeling?" she asked, not unkindly.

Hermione took a deep breath and rubbed at her clavicle, "Ginny, when did you become a… a _Healer_?"

Lily raised her eyebrows, "Hermione, I'm not Ginny… I am Lily Evans."

Hermione scrunched up her nose, "That's… a bit morbid, _Gin_ , don't you… think?" Her lashes fluttered and she fell back into again fast asleep.

Completely flabbergasted, Lily stood from her chair and felt Hermione's head, she was still hot. It was clear that Hermione was hallucinating, but it was _odd that it'd be morbid for this so-called Ginny to be playing as me_ — Lily thought. She wrote down all the vitals for the witch. She had so many questions and she wanted to ask them all before she allowed Sirius to come inside, but she was beginning to see that it might not be possible as she knew that she'd not be able to hold off the man for much longer.

It pained her to not say anything to Sirius about what was on Hermione's chart, it felt as she were lying to him… and being how _she_ was, she wanted to know all the facts before saying anything. She didn't want to cause him unnecessary pain. She glanced at her watch and the time was nearing six in the evening… and much to her dismay, it was time to send off a letter to... _Regulus Black._ She didn't want to... and she didn't know how to keep the man away until Sirius left.

 _God!_

The questions she had itching her brain were becoming painful. Lily shook her head and pinched down between her eyes. Closing the blind to the door, she left quietly.

….

Sirius had folded in on himself, bent forward and balancing on the toes of his boots, staring at the speckled design of the tile floor while awaiting his friend's arrival. It had been some time since he and the two witches made it to the hospital. As much as he cared for Lily, he was pissed off at her for the lack of information she was providing. Information she'd sworn to give.

Sitting on the table beside him was a small, stuffed hippogriff and a simple pink card with a note inside that said: _Feel better, SB._ He wanted to say much much more than that.

Remus whirled in without Sirius taking notice. He observed his friend squatting on the floor. Remus hadn't seen Sirius in such distraught since… well, never. There were times Sirius and James would get into arguments. Hell, even when he'd fight with Marlene, the man would get down… but he couldn't recall ever seeing Sirius like this. He almost looked broken, and if not carefully mended, could fall apart. Very slowly, Remus made his approach carefully and kneeled down beside him, laying a comforting hand onto his shoulder. "Mate, can I get you anything?"

Sirius glanced up, his eyes were bloodshot and watery. "Find Lily and figure out what the fuck is going on," he said through his teeth, then placed his head back between his hands and continued on staring at the floor.

"Have you seen Hermione, yet?" Remus asked, pretty sure that he knew the answer.

Sirius growled, revealing his animalistic anger and answer, which signaled the instinct within Moony. Moony studied Padfoot for a moment more, then stood to do what he was asked of him— honouring the needs of his pack.

It was curious for Lily to leave Sirius in the dark for so long, especially on matters such as this. The woman was very well aware of Sirius's affections for Hermione, so what was her reasoning? He hurried down the corridor to the nurses' station. "Excuse me, could someone tell Lily Evans that Remus Lupin is here?"

"Sure," one person said.

He stood there for about ten minutes, when he saw the woman coming down the hall. She carried a heavy shadow over her. She wasn't smiling or even seemingly happy to see him whatsoever. "Remus, I need you to take Sirius home," she said abruptly.

Taken aback, he jolted his neck with question, "Uh, why? He hasn't even gotten to see Hermione."

Lily shook her head, "Oh God, I wish I could tell you, truly I do. But I can't. And I can't even believe it for myself." She reached over and held Remus's forearm, "He has to be gone within the next hour."

"What? Lily, that's an ample amount of time for him to see Hermione. You know he's not going to leave without doing so," he said, almost unkindly.

She nodded, "Oh, I know. I'm sick about it. He will have to come back tomorrow. I spoke to Jamie earlier, he knows just as much as you and Sirius, but he understands that it is very, very important for you to take Sirius back to the house… please, I beg you."

Remus could see that Lily was hiding something big and it irritated him as well. He very much cared about the witch that had come into his life. And he wasn't okay with this scenario — however, he could smell the fear and distrust within Lily _and_ …

"Evans! Your guest is here — he's in Healer Steven's office," a woman called.

Lily frozen, her eyes wide. Remus watched as she gulped and nodded. "Shit...he's early." She said accidentally out loud.

Remus grew even more curious — "he? Who?" He asked.

 _Please_?" she said dryly, but desperately.

Remus didn't understand, but said, "Okay, but you know Sirius and I will be here first thing in the morning."

The redhead slightly nodded and turned without saying goodbye, rushing down the corridor to her guest.

….

After a long day at the Bazaar, Regulus sat down for tea with his family and dinner guest. They were just hitting their second course when Kreacher came to him with a silver tray and a letter sitting upon it. "Young Master Regulus has an urgent message," Kreacher announced with a bow. Catching Regulus by surprise, he suddenly became well aware of the eyes upon him and of his sweaty palms. He took the envelope and promptly opened it.

Walburga observed as her son took the letter between his hands and read. His face fell from curiosity to what looked like downright fear. She reached over for the letter, but he stood before she could even skim it with her fingertips. "Mother, Father, Lord and Lady Bates, I need to excuse myself. There is an urgent business matter to which I must attend."

Orion looked up and nodded — he knew men were often called away for matters that none need to worry with but for themselves. "Good on you, son!" Lord Bates said.

"Of course, my dear. Ones such as you are always at calling, I'm sure," Lady Bates stated.

Walburga, of course, started to groan, "Why is it so urgent? What's happened? Has the Dark Lord called for you?"

 _She is so desperate all the time…_ Regulus rolled his eyes and pushed in his chair. Before he could say anything, Orion cut in, "Honestly, woman! He has things to take care of. Shut your hole."

The witch straightened her shoulders and stabbed her steak menacingly. "He's my son, Orion…I _have a righ—"_ she was saying as Regulus made his way out of the dining room. He didn't want his parents to hear where he was heading; he ran up to his room, locked his door to use the privacy of his floo. He had to connect it properly with a few charms, however. But to keep his life a secret, he'd do anything. For her, especially.

He replayed the words of the letter he had received back and forth inside of his mind. His stomach sat at the start of his throat. He threw in the floo powder, and called out, _"Stevens, St Mungo's!"_

The letter was thrown to his bed and swiftly landed onto his pillow stating:

 _Regulus Black,_

 _I am writing to you regarding Hermione Granger, for whom you are named next-of-kind. It displeases me to inform you that Miss Granger, has been admitted into the ICU here at St Mungo's Hospital. Please come within the next hour and please do not use the visitor's entrance. Healer Stevens has said that you may use his office for your arrival._

 _Stevens, St Mungo's_

 _Lily Evans_

 _Healer_

Dusting himself from the ash and soot, he stepped into the quaint office. He noted Lily Evans stood by the door with her arms crossed. Healer Stevens behind his desk, not minding so much of who the guest was — he was well aware of the Black Family and dealt with them on occasion. However, he'd never met Regulus before. Healer Stevens stood, holding out his hand. "It's an unfortunate reason, but a pleasure to meet you. We have called for you today as Miss Hermione Granger is in a room here with us, due to a very serious circumstance that we are still trying to figure out."

Regulus felt Lily staring at him. He knew of her, as they were in school at the same time. She was always with his brother and his brother's friends. He'd never really spoken to her, but knew of her as a know-it-all and Head Girl. He turned to face her, reddened face with risen brows.

"Why is she your next of kin? If she's related to you, she's related to your… _Sirius_. And that can't be because she's Muggleborn—which is something _your_ family _hates_." Lily's nostrils flared, her fingers squeezed her biceps bruisingly as she said this.

Regulus turned back to Healer Stevens, "Is she awake?"

This angered Lily further. He flat out ignored her, _How dare he!_

Healer Stevens sensed the dislike and disapproval between the two. " _Er—_ she hasn't fully come aware, no. But she is stable. You may see her; Healer Evans can take you to her room."

"I'm not taking him until he answers!" she countermanded.

"I think that is up to him, Lily," Healer Stevens said. "Mister Black doesn't owe you, or anyone else for that matter, an explanation."

She stomped a foot and twisted her hands into fists, " _Fine._ Let's go." She swung open the door, almost hitting Regulus in the face.

Healer Stevens stood, "Evans, if you can't control yourself, you will be dismissed, understood?"

Lily straightened her chin and gave him a quick nod, "Yes, sir."

Outside in the hall, the door shut, and with none other around, Regulus rounded Lily against the wall, a wand held against her jawline. Her chest rose rapidly against his arm, "You will not remember anything about writing to me, seeing me, or even knowing that I am Hermione's contact. You will also forget anything about Hermione's bloodline and her chart. She's only here due to the flu."

" _You can't force that!"_ Lily spat.

"Oh, yes. I can. _Obliviate Somnum!_ " She fell quickly into slumber. Regulus carried her down to the floor and situated her to look as if she fell asleep sitting.

He made his way to Hermione's room. When he opened the door, she was sitting up on her pillow, staring at the door. " _Regulus?_ Thank goodness it's you! _Wait_ — why is it you?"

He frowned and moved to her side, "What happened, Granger?"

She let out a sigh, "It's a time-travel side effect. It's only just the start of what could happen…"

He nodded, "We need to figure out how to make this better. You can't stay here, Hermione. Perhaps I can fix all of this myself. Just give me the tasks… I'll do what I can."

She laughed softly, "You can't do that. I _won't_ let you. I appreciate your trying, but that can't happen. I have to be here. I have to fix this. I was sent here for a reason." He looked down to his shiny shoes. "Why are you here, Regulus?"

He knew he couldn't avoid the question for much longer, "Well, I am your next-of-kin."

She scrunched her nose, " _What?_ How can that be? We're not related… or… did you set something upon us when we made our vow?" It wasn't even anger that instilled the question — honestly, she wouldn't have minded if that were the case, but she'd have liked to have known.

He shook his head, "No. I don't understand it, either. We've no relations aside from being friends… and… I would have thought that if anything, it'd be Sirius because… _not me."_

Hermione knew why he thought that — neither said it aloud as they didn't have to, but there was a bond between Sirius and Hermione, which would have been a very clear explanation that Sirius would be an emergency contact for her. "We can perform a bond-line? See as to why…" the man suggested.

Hermione nodded, "I would say yes, but I am much too weak for that just now."

"I can do it. It's just, we may find out things that we don't want to know or want each other to know."

Hermione nodded, "I understand. But, I trust you with everything. I'm not afraid of you knowing and very clearly, I am connected to you in some way special — a way that called for you to be here."

It enlightened him to hear that. "Do you know when you can leave?"

She shook her head, "No. I only just woke up. You're the first I've seen since I've been here."

He went on to explain to her what happened with Lily and that she needed to explain to her friends it was only a flu and that he'd deal with the papers that Healer Stevens had inside of his office. "I will leave to retrieve a book. It's one that is inside my family's library."

"Can you take me with you? I can't sit around and do nothing," she said desperately. "And if you don't, I'll just break out on my own!"

He thought about it, thinking of the route to take once they arrived in his home, then said, "Yes, all right. I'll let Healer Stevens know that you're feeling well enough and take care of everything else. Be ready in fifteen."

"Regulus! Wait…"

He turned, "Yes?"

"I haven't any clothes."

He smiled. "I can take care of that."

….


	18. Alive to Live a Lie

Healer Stevens stood in the hearth of the floo at Potter Cottage, within a firecall. " _Mr Potter, your fiancée has fallen asleep. Would you care to come through to retrieve her?"_

Confused as to why his fiancée had fallen asleep, as he's seen her stay up three days straight before worrying herself over a test while at Hogwarts, he nodded. "Yes, sir. Thank you."

When James came back downstairs from laying his future wife to bed, he found Sirius and Remus standing with their arms crossed and full of questions. Potter held up both his hands and said, "She didn't even wake up when I took off her shoes. This whole thing has obviously taken a toll on her as well. She wouldn't tell me what's happened when I asked earlier and I doubt she will tell you until she can be cleared to do so," pointing at Sirius.

"Yes _bu—_ " Sirius began.

James shook his head, "I understand she said she'd come to you, but did you ever think that perhaps Hermione asked for her information to be kept quiet?"

Sirius furrowed his brows, "No."

Remus had actually thought of that; however they were under the impression that Hermione had been unconscious the entire time, unless Lily was protecting her. But, if that were the case, Lily would've said so. It wasn't that far fetched; Hermione seemed a private person. Still, it didn't make up for the time they'd spent waiting at Mungo's, and it kept the two dogs on their hind-legs, sniffing. It was frustrating that James was being a mature role model. Because if it were Lily and he in this situation, he'd be the polar opposite. The Marauders moved round the kitchen table. Remus made them all tea and added a bit of whisky to Sirius's. "So what exactly happened?" Potter inquired at last.

Sirius began to explain everything from his and Hermione's night together, to finding her on the floor that afternoon. He left out the great details of her scars though… and Remus could sense Sirius was hiding that. James noticed it as well, but he didn't say anything. The two men just listened like friends should until Sirius was ready for advice or whatever else needed to come next.

James was the first to speak once Padfoot finished talking. He sat up in in chair, resting his forearms on the table and said, "Well, mate, I think you need to get some rest. You can stay here if you'd like, but if you go back to your flat, you can't go wandering off to—"

" _I'll go_ with him," Remus said, cutting in. He knew if Sirius were to leave, it wouldn't be to his flat. He'd sit outside Hermione's hospital door, whimpering for entrance.

As soon as Sirius went through the fireplace of his home, he headed to Hermione's room. No thoughts of rummaging through her things crossed his mind. Instead, he removed the sweat stained sheets, replacing them with fresh-smelling linen. He folded down the top of the blanket as he had seen her do in passing, then stacked the pillows in order with the decorative sham in front of the others. He sat down on the edge of the mattress, running his fingers over a strip of thread between the patterns of the quilt. He wished it had been her, he was placing his fingers upon. Last night had been so great. Waking up to her was even better. It was made abundantly clear to him that there was more than just sexual tension between them, and it wasn't one-sided anymore.

….

James stood with his hands on his waist, shaking his head as he looked past Remus, watching Sirius escape through the flames. "He knows somethin' more than he's telling us," he said, concerned.

Remus nodded, "I'm glad you caught that, too. Maybe I can get him to talk to me tonight. But I've a feeling he's not going to say anything."

James removed his glasses then rubbed at his eyes, "You've spent more time with Hermione than any of us, including Pads… has she told you anything curious?"

Looking past his friend, he thought back to the conversations he'd had with the woman. Remus began to realize that she'd become very dear to him… and he, obviously, to her; she had entrusted him with things that he was sure she hadn't shared with anyone else. She had been in some pretty nasty situations, most of which made sense, others he knew he'd not get the entire story until she was ready to open up completely. But he knew she'd had traumatizing things happen and at the end of every story she would say: _Please don't tell Sirius. I don't want him to worry about me…_

There was a part of him that wanted to speak to Sirius about it all. Perhaps it'd give more detail to the answers he'd been given… but that would break the friendship he held with Hermione and the thought of that ached him.

Remus looked into the questioning blue eyes of James Potter. He sighed when he said, "Hermione has stories, like all of us… but hers come from a darker background that includes violence and death. Her family was killed because of war. I can't tell you much else because she has asked me not to." He nibbled at his lower lip, hoping he _hadn't_ said too much.

James exhaled and said, "I understand. Get to Sirius' flat. Keep an eye on him, mate. Because if you don't —"

"I know," Remus said, "Sirius has fallen deep into the rabbit hole, my friend. I'm afraid we won't be able to fish him out of this."

James chuckled dolefully, "He was never this way with Marlene… or _any_ other girl, was he?"

"I thought maybe at one point he had it bad over Marley… but seeing him about Hermione, I was most definitely wrong. Marlene McKinnon wasn't anything compared to this." Remus threw the silvery powder into the fireplace and nodded his farewell to his friend.

" _Padfoot_?" Remus called, stepping into the sitting room. He sniffed the air (one thing he was thankful for from his werewolf capabilities) Sirius was there. He quietly stalked to the bedrooms and found Sirius, not asleep, but lying on Hermione's bed staring at the ceiling. "Pads… you all right?"

In a husky tenor, Sirius answered, "I thought she was going to die, Moony." He was holding the hippogriff he'd purchased at the hospital gift shop on his chest. "I thought she was going to die and I didn't know what to do. To say. But every ounce of air left my body when I saw her lying there on the floor." He paused and sat up, the hippogriff falling down to his feet. Remus didn't say anything. He was afraid of what _to_ say. He listened though, feeling the pain colouring Sirius's tone. " _This woman_ — she has a whole life ahead of her; to have babies, to be married, to have a career. I didn't think about any of that when she was laying there. What I did think to myself, selfishly: don't leave me." He thought back to the way Hermione writhed, the way she was desperately reaching out for him with all the strength she could muster, her fingertips barely skimming the material of his shirt.

Remus stared at the ground, unknowingly, where Sirius had found her. He had a witch he'd been seeing for a little while. He liked her a lot, but it was now clear that he didn't feel the way Sirius felt about Hermione whatsoever. Mostly the woman was someone he'd have a go around with a couple times a week — even questioned at one time if they could be something more, but the relationship never really felt connected. And for that matter, he didn't want to bring her around his mates. Love was a curious thing, he realised over the years… seeing it between his friends… the only one who was really different had been James. Though he stated he had loved Lily Evans from day one — there was extreme difference from the puppy love of childhood crushes, weekly girlfriends, to the maddening love that James had fallen into with Lily. Seeing Sirius this way about Hermione really opened his mind to the feelings that the man had carried for this woman and it never compared to the feelings he, himself, had held for anyone he'd been with.

He knew it, too. Once things were good between Sirius and Hermione, it would be the most wonderful thing for the both of them… but if it got bad between them… _well…_

Cautiously, Moony moved closer to Padfoot and sat alongside him. He laid an open palm upon Sirius's shoulder and said, "The good thing is she is alive. She's safe within the walls of St. Mungo's and if anything were to go wrong, the healers are there to help her." He thought twice before he continued, knowing it to be a lie, but hoping it'd possibly calm his friend's nerves. "P-plus, if anything were truly wrong, Lily would've have told you." He felt the guilty heat rise upon his cheeks.

Sirius scoffed, " _Remus_ , you know damn well that Lily was keeping something from me." His entire face went pale, "Oh, Merlin. What if Hermione is— _is pregnant?!_ And that's _why_ Lily didn't say anything?!"

Remus was surprised at the way that thought made him feel: queasy, nervous. "Uh… well, _no_. That's probably not it, Pads. I'm sure she's really just ill," he said unconvincingly.

Sirius scoffed again, "Even you know _that's_ not true." He shook his head, "I don't think that's it either, not after what I had seen today. But even if it were pregnancy, would it be _so bad?_ " he asked, regretfully once he seen Remus' face, which was bright red.

"Yes, Sirius. That would be bad… Hermione is a great person, but you don't even really know her. Sure, you've had some great go arounds with her, but… mate you should be really sure about someone before you go and have babies with them." He removed his hand from Sirius's shoulder. "That's something that… ties you for life. I don't think Hermione is a bad person, but, we've all known her for less than a month… anything could happen."

Sirius knew all of this. Within that moment of weakness, it was good to hear that reassurance from his old friend. "I know. I was just thinking that it could be that rather than something much worse…" he rolled his eyes, "something good in a bad time… you know?"

Remus smiled woefully, "I understand. Honestly, brother, I think that we need to wait to be told what's happening instead of making up scenarios in our heads…" he swallowed, almost not saying the next line, " _and_ , I think that you are so terribly in _love_ with Hermione, it's making your brain go all fuzzy to the point you're not thinking straight."

Sirius closed his eyes and said quietly, "Don't say that word, Remus."

The latter furrowed his brows, " _What?_ Why?"

SUrius's black locks fell around his face as he shook his head, "If I let myself fall in love with her… she will _just…"_

Hermione would break this man into a thousand tiny pieces. "Mate…" _You are already in love with her…_ he wanted to say. _You're already breaking._

Sirius looked on at Remus questioningly, "What?"

"Nothing…" he stood from Hermione's bed and left the room.

" _Love_ ," he said. Sirius knew Remus was right, but he didn't want to admit it, because once he did, he knew all the strength he had holding him up would dwindle away. He wanted to see Hermione. He was pissed at Lily for not letting him see her. He thought twice about leaving the flat to wait for visiting hours at the hospital, but sat back down onto the woman's bed instead, picking the fallen hippogriff from beside his feet and setting it on her bedside table.

….

The dawn sky came in, periwinkle and peach, the clouds a deep purple. The sun was rising now. Morning dew dropped from the leaves of the trees, insects began to buzz. Hermione rested her forearms on the ledge of Regulus's bannister outside of his room, looking over the small garden in the backyard. She was surprised to see that it had actually been filled with flowers, fruits, and vegetables. In her time, it was full of scattered ivy, dead plants, broken twigs… uncared for. She watched as Kreacher was filling a weaved basket with strawberries.

Regulus moved beside her, setting a silver tray on the small table behind them. "I've brought tea up. Mother and Father will be awake within the hour. How are you feeling?"

Hermione sighed, "I feel alright. Tired mostly." She yawned.

Regulus held his arm toward his bed, "You may sleep."

The woman chuckled at his mannerisms, "No. It's okay. I don't think I could." She removed herself from the bannister and began to fill her teacup with scalding water, watching as it turned from a steamy clear liquid to brown. "I've too many bad memories of this place," she said honestly.

Regulus nodded and sat down, "I can understand that. I've had my own mishaps in this damned house."

The chill of the morning wind flew through. Hermione lifted the cup to her, cradling the warmth between her hands. "It's strange, I was always under the impression that you were the favourite child — so _loved_ , as you had given up your life _to…"_

Regulus stopped her. "Absolutely not. I didn't _want_ to do that. The Dark Lord wanted people who were _wanting_ of the mark." He rested his right hand over the covered tattoo on his left forearm. "I was forced into it, Hermione. But I didn't fight… I didn't even fight them…" he said of his parents. "I was always just told what I needed to do — why I needed to do it… _for the greater good."_ he air quoted _. "_ But I never believed it. I just did what I had to do — to survive. I remember when Sirius and I were younger. He'd always protect me from our mother. Our father wasn't around much… but Mother always had such a pretty face, always wanted to hold herself to a high standard to everyone on the outside… Sirius and I had better behave, or _else_." Hermione watched as he gripped the armrests of his chair. "One day, I just wanted to see what or else meant, so I stole all the flowers my mother had ordered for a luncheon and set them on fire." He gulped.

 _"Reggie! What have you_ done _!?" Sirius came running out behind his brother. They stood in the back garden. Regulus stared glassy eyed at the brilliant gold and blue flames spiraling up toward the sky. "How did you even learn this magic?"_

 _Regulus looked up at his big brother, "I thought I'd teach Mother a lesson! She never pays any attention to us! She_ hates _us, I swear it!"_

 _Sirius' heart thumped out of his chest, "Regulus, get inside and change your clothes! You're going to get into so much trouble, please just go!" He yelled and brought out his wand. Being only thirteen, he hadn't really excelled in the proper technique of putting out a fire as he'd never had to do it before._

 _Regulus pouted and crossed his arms, "Why?! Are you afraid Mother is going to hurt me? I'm used to it! She always slaps my head! Or pinches me!"_

 _Sirius was crying, "Please, Reg! Just go inside! Please!"_

 _Regulus did what was asked of him, but stopped when he heard his mother's harsh screaming as she ran outside, right toward Sirius. Sirius's body was flung away from the fire. He watched as Walburga put out the flames, then rounded on her oldest son. She picked him up by the collar of his shirt and threw him against the brick wall. "You think you're clever, do you?" She swirled a flame from her own wand and began to burn Sirius' arm, scarring him._

"He never screamed. He never gave me away. He just took it. He didn't talk to me for a month… and I never disobeyed again."

Hermione wiped away her tears. She knew of the scar that wrapped around Sirius' forearm. In the future, it was covered in a tattoo, ancient runes, actually. Now, it was just there; she hadn't thought much of it now, assumed it happened during a mission… in her own time… or perhaps it was something that had happened during his sentence in Azkaban… she hadn't put two and two together until now. And the story made her heart hurt.

"Please do not think ill of me, Granger," Regulus said, not looking at her.

Hermione shook her head, answering shakily. "I don't think badly of you. You both were young… stupid things happen. Especially between siblings…" she tried, but Regulus knew different.

"That was the beginning of the end for Sirius and I." He tapped the chair with his fingers. "Anyway, I'd invite you for breakfast with the family, but seeing as you're here before the sun has even shown itself and my parents aren't up, that would be tremendously wrong of me and you'd be marked as…"

" _A whore,"_ Hermione said scornfully. "It amazes me that your family — well, nearly the whole of the Sacred Twenty-Eight abide by such rules. Things change a lot in the future… and if the Royal Court," she said, referring to the Pureblood families, "would just step out of their— their emerald encrusted shells, they'd see that the world around them just now is changing… and women leave men's houses within the night… and wear bikinis…mini skirts, blue jeans…" she then pointed at Regulus, " _your_ mother would probably keel over if she'd seen any of that!"

Regulus stifled a laugh, "Then perhaps we should take her someplace just to watch it happen."

Hermione smiled, then frowned, "Mistakes happen, Regulus. I'm sure Sirius forgave you for that mishap a long time ago."

He vaguely nodded, looking passed her, " _Maybe_. I will retrieve the book we spoke of. Then we will worry with the logistics of our odd situation. I will have you go to Narcissa, I will call for her to pick you up. It'd be more believable for you to have stayed with her… she is good at coming up with stories.

Hermione suddenly felt nervous. "I met Narcissa weeks ago in a Muggle store… what if that wasn't supposed to happen?"

Regulus scrunched his nose, "What do you mean?"

Hermione shrugged, "I don't know. I just… nothing. It'll be fine." She waved her nerves away and blamed it on the lack of sleep.

Regulus asked if she were sure a few times more before he called his lovely cousin through the fire and within minutes, the beautiful blonde woman came through in silk pyjamas, hair in rollers, and a fuzzy pair of pink slippers.

" _Regulus Arcturus Black!_ Do you realise just what time it is?! I don't care that we are family, you don't come throwing your nose into my floo calling me through because you want to get yourself out of _trouble—_ " her frustration fell through the floor as soon as her eyes fell upon Hermione. Her frown turned instantly into a smile. "Why! It's you! This, _this_ , is who you've been seeing? Oh, how lovely! Please, I beg your pardon, what is your name, I've forgotten! But not your face. So lovely it is to see you again!" Narcissa said, making her way to the chair alongside Hermione's.

Hermione felt at ease and laughed overly loud at Regulus' mock surprise, "The two of you know each other?"

"It's Hermione," the witch said to Narcissa, "and yes, Regulus, not really _know_ , but we are acquainted…"

Narcissa was bursting to tell the tale. "It was a rainy afternoon. I had just gotten into a tiff with Mother, so I left the restaurant and I wanted to do something rebellious. I stumbled into a Muggle apparel store, one that I've wanted to visit for ages! That is where I met Hermione!" She reached over and grabbed the Muggleborn's hand and squeezed. "I am so delighted to see you again, dear! I am very happy to pretend you stayed with me last night, however, we really should have a sleepover! I'd love to get to know you better." She smiled, then looked down at Hermione's clothes. "Are you a Healer?"

Hermione realised that she still bore the lime green robes that Regulus had stolen out of a closet at the hospital. She shook her head and laughed, " _No_ … it's a long story that I'd rather not get into, but it's partly the reason why we've called for your help."

Narcissa shrugged, she really didn't care what Hermione's profession was, but was happy to be of service. "Of course! I've got clothes at home that you can wear. We've got to get into a story as to why I didn't introduce you to the family last night."

"Just say she is a friend from Beauxbatons or ballet. Your mother wouldn't question that, would she?" Regulus asked.

"Hmm. Probably not. I think I'll go with ballet. That'd be easier.. Mother wouldn't go looking too deep into that. Well, come along, Hermione dear!"

"Wait," Hermione said, "Regulus… we've got one problem…"

Narcissa stopped in her tracks and turned to the two of them, "Don't worry about it, Hermione. I have no issues with it."

Regulus and Hermione turned to the witch, whitefaced and nauseous. "What — what do you mean?" Regulus asked. His hands began to tremble and grow clammy.

"Siggy was here earlier, fetching strawberries from your garden, as my own mother won't grow them just now; her reasoning has something todo with the Witch's Almanac," she waved away. "So as Siggy provided me my breakfast, she told me she smelled something unusual and was sure that it was a different breed of blood," she said casually.

"And you're certain that your elf wouldn't say anything?" Regulus asked.

Narcissa shook her head, " _Absolutely_ not. Siggy is mine," the blonde pointed to herself. "She is bound to me… she tells me everything and reveals nothing to anyone else, unless I tell her otherwise." She reached back to Hermione, taking her hand into her own, "Your secret is safe with me."

….


	19. It's A Madness

_Sunshine flooded the streets of Verona…_ _It was hot, but there was a slight breeze, just enough to cool us. We were sitting outside a quaint Italian cafe, finishing our second bottle of wine. She reached over and touched my hand, smiling sweetly. "You're amazing, Sirius," she said to me._

 _I took her hand and kissed every knuckle, grabbing her wrist and pulled her from her seat to my lap. "Non c'è nessuno più sorprendente di te," I whispered into her ear._

 _She giggled, the laughter reverberating into my chest. "Must I remind you? I am not fluent."_

 _Then very huskily, just the way I knew she liked, I said again, "There is none more amazing than you." Her cheeks reddened, but it didn't stop her from turning and touching my face. Her amber eyes looked into my own gray ones lovingly… then pleadingly._

" _Help me," she said simply._

" _What?" I asked._

" _Help me." The sun faded from the background and all around us went black. It was just us sitting on that very stool outside the cafe. She stood from me and began to walk away._

" _Where are you going, love?" I asked but she kept walking. "Hermione?" I tried to stand from my seat, but I was stuck. I watched as she disappeared right before my eyes. She was nowhere, but then her voice desperate, boomed, "Help me!"_

His eyes fluttered open. It was no longer hot. Actually, it was very chilly. He sat up and looked from left to right around the dim room. The flat was quiet aside from the bang of the air conditioning unit turning on. _I have got to put a silencing charm on that thing._ He wiped down his face, rubbing away the sleep from his eyes. Throwing his legs over the side of her bed, he stood quickly and left the room to go to his own.

Slamming open his bedroom door, Remus jumped up with wand at the ready and in proper dueling stance until he realized that the man standing before him was only Sirius. "What the hell, Pads? You all right? You gave me a start," he said, taking a breath finally.

Sirius caught a glimpse of himself in the mirror. His mane was wild and he looked a bit scary. He tried to smother the chuckle, "Sorry. I had a weird dream. It woke me."

Remus nodded, "Okay… and _what was_ the weird dream about?"

Sirius blinked blankly, "I… actually… don't remember. But I need to see Hermione."

Remus looked over at the clock on the wall, "Mate. The visiting hours haven't even started yet."

Clapping his hands together, Sirius nodded. "Which means we can be the first there to see her! Don't you think we'd be the faces she'd want to see?"

Remus finally yawned, after the initial shock had left him. "Sure, Padfoo—" Sirius lit up. "—after I have a shower."

Sirius rounded the bed and started to push his friend toward the bathroom, "Okay! Hurry it up!" And just for measure, he smacked Remus on his hind end. Before the man could say anything, Sirius was pulling the door closed, waving at him.

He went back into Hermione's room, figuring she might like to wear something different than those stupid hospital robes. Opening the closet door, he was actually quite surprised at the amount of clothes the woman acquired in such little time she had been there. A pale yellow dress caught his eye. As he pulled it from the hanger, he jangled the jewelry hanging on inside the wall; not thinking much of it he closed the door back, just missing the Time-Turner.

"Remus! You done yet?" Sirius called through the door, he felt the steam from the room escaping the crack at the bottom.

"Yes, but could I possibly borrow some clothes?" he asked, opening the bathroom, revealing himself in a towel.

Sirius nodded, "Yeah. I grabbed Hermione a dress." He held up the yellow material.

Remus furrowed his brows together, "A _dress_? Padfoot —"

"Leave it, Moony. Come on," he turned away toward his room.

Remus shook his head and followed his friend. As he entered, his face was hit with a t-shirt. He pulled it away, only to have his face jabbed again with another article of clothing. Sirius stormed past the wolf with the dress in one hand, as he was pulling his top off with the other to change into a fresh shirt as well.

The men arrived inside the hospital as visiting hours were just opening. A Mediwitch, around their age walked up. The tag on her robes read: _Summer_. "Can I help you gentleman?"

Sirius decided this was the perfect time to put on his charm. He smiled brightly and leaned forward. "Well, Miss Summer…" a blush rose on her cheeks and down her neck. "We are here to visit a Miss Hermione Granger. Do you think you could show us the way?" He, of course, knew the way to Hermione's room. But he couldn't help to make a pretty girl squirm when he got the chance.

Summer blinked, "Erm… let me, let me check, Mr…?"

"Black, love." He winked. "Sirius Black."

She straightened her shoulders and with a lot more curve than before to her rear-end, she pranced away.

Remus was shaking with laughter. "You are so bad, you know that."

"Works every time. Ah, here she comes…" the raven-haired man held his hands out toward the pretty witch.

Summer wasn't smiling now, "I'm sorry, Mr. Black, but it looks like Miss Granger decided to discharge late last night with a… well, looks like a member of family." She looked up, her green eyes blinking rapidly as she watched Sirius storm away, throwing the yellow dress down to the ground as he did.

"Did I… say something wrong?" she asked of Remus.

"Who did she leave with?" he countered.

"Umm…" she looked at the paperwork in her hands, "Regulus Black… Miss Granger only had the flu, according to the charts." She turned the clipboard toward him to show. She smiled solemnly. "A few potions and she was good to go! Hope Mr. _Sirius_ Black is okay."

Remus eyes widened at what he read. He licked his lips and nodded, "Me too." He walked on and picked up the fallen dress from the floor. He knew Sirius wasn't going back to the flat.

Throwing the ash inside the floo, he stepped over to the Potter Cottage, right into Sirius yelling for Lily but he was being guarded by James, pushing him back. "What the fuck, Sirius?! Step off mate!"

"No! Get Lily down here! She's a fucking liar, James! She knows more than she is letting on." Sirius was pushing against his friend, showing off his bulk.

James was about to round out a punch, when Remus stepped up, pulled Sirius back, and yelled. "You both need to _calm the fuck down!_ " As the yelling was an uncommon occurrence from Remus Lupin, the men shut up. "It's _true_ , James. Lily knows something more than she's telling _any_ of us. Unless she's told you, she's keeping it from you too!"

James was obviously offended, _this_ was his fiancée his two best friends were on about. His fists were tightened and he clenched his jaw a few times before he finally asked. "She hasn't told me anything. She actually has been asleep since I brought her back. You saw for yourself that she was out."

"Last night at the hospital, Lily said that visiting hours were over and that she needed me to get Sirius out of there fast. I tried asking her why, but she wouldn't tell me," Remus explained. "Then right before I left, the Healer who was tending to Hermione called for Lily and told her that her _guest_ had arrived."

James looked almost assaulted at the insinuation. He kept himself at a distance, with his arms crossed over his chest, but he nodded for Remus to go on. "This morning, when we arrived at the hospital, Sirius asked to see Hermione but was promptly told that she discharged last night with a member of family."

James looked up, understanding finally seeping into the seams. "But I thought—"

"Hermione doesn't have any family," Sirius said just above a whisper. "That's right. They all died according to her."

"Then _who_ …?" James turned to Remus.

The werewolf swallowed hard. Sirius hadn't even this bit of information. He closed his eyes and sighed, "I think that we need to talk to Lily to understand this. There has to be some sort of miscommunication."

Sirius moved closer to his longtime friend. Anger and confusion clear over his features. "You know who she left with don't you?"

Remus nodded. "Yes. It doesn't make sense. I don't believe it. That's why we should talk to Lily. And I'd like to talk to her in private."

"No. No whatever this miscommunication may be, I have every right to know, Remus," Sirius started. "This is a person I have… this is someone important to me, and I shouldn't be left out when there is very clearly something going on. You have no rights over me for that. So tell me."

"She left with your brother, Sirius," Remus stated plainly.

"Holy shit," James muttered.

" _Jamie_?" Lily called down the stairs. " _James is someone here?"_

He looked at Sirius desperately begging him to not say anything.

Sirius sneered, "Fuck this. And fuck _her_ for not telling me." He pointed up the stairwell. He spun around on his foot, throwing the floo powder inside the fireplace whispering his destination so the ones behind him couldn't find him.

Lily came down the stairs, clearly worried as she had heard voices and James wasn't answering her. "James, you didn't … I heard you talking… _Oh_ , Remus… it's early. You alright?"

He glanced up at her, suddenly feeling threatened by her. He lowly growled, "I have to go."

"Wait. What's going on?" she asked, coming down the stairs fully. She stood beside James now and even he was sort of stand-offish with her.

"Lily, is there anything you want to tell us about Hermione's visit at the hospital?" James inquired.

She rubbed her head, "Er, well. It turned out she had the flu… I've an awful headache; I hope I'm not catching it."

Remus and James exchanged glances without her notice. " _Okay_ , love. Do you recall telling Remus that he needed to get Sirius out of the hospital and there was a guest for Hermione?"

Lily blinked once, twice, three times; trying to remember last night but she was just so damn tired. " _No_ …" she reached forward and touched Remus' forehead. "You feelin' okay?" He flinched at her touch, causing her to pull back as if she were struck.

"Why are you lying?" James asked bluntly.

She looked up at him, confused, hurt, and offended. "I—I'm not? I don't understand your accusation, James. And I don't understand _your_ rudeness," she said to Remus. "Hermione is at the hospital. She _has_ a bad case of the flu. There's nothing more to it. Why is this such a big deal? Where is Sirius? Why isn't he the one here asking questions? She's his… _whatever_! Not the two of you."

James was a mixture of different emotions. He wanted to believe his fiancée; why would she lie about something like that or anything for that matter? But then again, Sirius and Remus would never _ever_ lie to him about anything, either... they never have.

"I better find Sirius. He's probably on a witch hunt by now and if I don't find him soon, he may end up in Azkaban for murder." Remus said. He glanced at Lily once more. Her face red and murderous within itself. He gave a wary look at James and sighed. "Catch up with you later."

James looked down at his wife, his arms still crossed. "What is with you, Lily? It's not like you to lie. Tell me the truth."

She scoffed, "Really, James? After everything we've been through, you're going to sit here and accuse me of lying?"

He chuckled without humour. "Says the woman who spiked Hermione's drink."

She blanched, "How did you—"

He raised his brows, "I know a lot more than I lead on, Lily Evans. So either you concoct that truth serum of yours or you tell me the truth."

Her face was as red as her hair now. "Fine. Give me an hour. But once you find that I am telling you the truth, we have a lot to talk about James Potter. And that includes this ring on my finger!" She turned so fast away from him, her smacked him in the face.

….

Siggy paced back and forth within the confines of her cupboard with her bony arms crossed and the hairs of atop of her head swaying back and forth. She felt conflicted to tell Lady Narcissa of the scent she had gathered when she arrived at Lord Orion's home. She knew that Kreacher was bound to Master Regulus and would not tell her of anything and once she had seen the fellow help, she could tell he was holding in a massive anger. But she continued to gather the strawberries and made her way home to set Lady Narcissa her fruit before breakfast.

Siggy came inside of her Lady's room through the maid's entrance just as the woman was getting out of bed; the door slammed closed behind her causing the waking witch to jump. Siggy apologized then settled the tray down a little more harshly than intended which gathered Narcissa's attention fully.

" _Siggy_?" she asked abashedly. "It's not like you to be so careless. Whatever is the matter?"

Bringing her hands before her, she teetered her fingers together nervously, her eyes widened. She had never been beaten by Narcissa and was sure that now would be the time it'd happen. "Erm… well…" her pupils were enlarged and her ears were beginning to twitch.

Narcissa grew impatient. The woman had a soft voice and really never showed rage toward anyone aside from her mother and at times her sister's. This wasn't something that the house elf was used to. "Siggy! Tell me right now what is going on!"

Siggy nodded, "I'm ever so sorry, My Lady. It's only something… something not quite right has happened in your cousin's home."

Narcissa creased her forehead curiously. "Is that so? What is it?" She entrusted a lot of faith in her house elf and knew she was right in doing so. Siggy had pledged allegiance to Narcissa many moons ago, promising she would always take care of Narcissa and the family she grew, as long as the elf shall live.

"Siggy smelled… _tainted_ blood, My Lady. Blood of a Muggleborn." She twisted her long bony fingers together.

Narcissa exhaled a long breathy sigh. "Interesting. Well, it's no bother to me. But very odd that Kreacher hasn't said anything to Walburga." She touched her chin with a manicured finger. "I suppose I'll have to go over later and see for myself what is going on."

Siggy was dumbstruck but blissfully happy that Narcissa didn't strike her for the late news. "Y-yes, My Lady…" the elf excused herself, leaving Narcissa to enjoy her fruit.

Just as she was picking at her strawberries, a fire crackled inside the hearth. "Oh, what now?" she said to no one.

" _Narcissa_ , _are you awake?"_ Regulus's voice called.

She stood from the chair and crossed over to the pit. "What if I wasn't?"

" _Oh you are! Lovely. I need you to come over… right now… need your help with a bit of a scandal!"_ Before she could answer, he pulled his head from the heatless flames and back into his own room.

She didn't even look into the mirror as she slipped on her slippers and strode through the floo network into his room. " _Regulus Arcturus Black!"_

….

Hermione stepped inside of Narcissa's bedroom. It was a lot different than she would've imagined. It wasn't Slytherin at all. Her walls were painted a pale blue, adorned with gold Fleur-de-lis. In a way it actually reminded Hermione of the Beauxbaton girls that were at her school during her fourth year. A high chandelier hung from the ceiling, candles on the walls were no longer lit, and the white drapes were pulled aside, tendrils of sunlight belted through, magnifying the particles of dust glittering through the air. Hermione's eye was caught by the large painting of a ballerina dancing.

"It's Edgar Degas...ever heard of him?" Narcissa asked lightly.

Hermione turned toward the woman. "Um, no." Her cheeks tinged pink. "I've always been fascinated with art, just never took the time to learn about it. Which is odd, as I want to learn about everything, really…" she said nervously.

Narcissa caught on and laughed, "Why are you nervous, Hermione?"

Hermione twisted her hands and shrugged, "I— it's not that I am nervous, Narcissa. I just have fallen into a web of lies and I hate myself for it." She closed her mouth quickly and closed her eyes. _Why did I just say that?_ She peeled open one eye to see Narcissa standing there with a skeptical expression _._

"Hermione, you have nothing to be ashamed of here. Your secrets, your lies, your truths; everything is safe here with me," Narcissa said honestly.

"Why are you being so nice to me?" Hermione asked finally.

"Why were you so nice to me that day in the shop?" she countered. "Just because I am a part of a higher society than most doesn't mean I have to be a snob. I have my secrets and lies as well. Everyone does. It doesn't make me, or you, any less of a person. It makes us human. It makes us real."

 _Merlin,_ Hermione thought to herself. _What happened to her all these years? How could she go from this wonderful to being married to a power-hungry man that raised a spoiled brat?_ Even though Narcissa was on a _good_ line before Hermione left 1998… she took a deep breath at the realization, _Well, she had her secrets._ Nodding her head, Hermione moved deeper inside Narcissa's room and sat down at the table.

"So lets get you out of those clothes and into something a little more… regal. I am more accepting than my family, so the Mungo's outfit isn't going to work,"tThe blonde said, scanning Hermione with her blue eyes.

"I have nice clothes… they are just in my closet at my flat," Hermione said.

"Well, seeing as we have fifteen minutes before we need to get down to breakfast, and an unconnected floo, you'll just have to wear something of mine."

Five minutes later, Hermione was sitting before the vanity, dressed in a peach-sequined day dress that was something out of the twenties; Siggy at her hair, curling it up into a bob.

Narcissa sported out of her closet in something similar, but ivory. "Oh, darling, you look lovely," she said, coming to Hermione's side.

The curly-headed witch stood before the elongated mirror in disbelief that it was really her staring back. "Wow… thank you, Narcissa."

The blonde laid a hand on Hermione's shoulder and smiled. "Shall we?"

Hermione didn't know what to expect when they entered the dining room. Cygnus Black barely looked up from the Daily Prophet when they walked in. "Oh, you've a friend, Cissa?"

Narcissa smiled and daintily held out her hand toward Hermione. "Yes, Daddy, this is Hermione Granger. She is the late Hector Dagworth-Granger's granddaughter."

Hermione was stunned at Narcissa's revelation. How had she known? But she didn't show the question, she turned to Cygnus and curtsied, "How do you do?"

"Wonderful, Miss Granger, have a seat." He held out his hand for his daughter and guest to sit.

Falling into her normal routine, Narcissa buttered and jammed some toast as Hermione wasn't sure what to do. She didn't want to seem rude, but Narcissa seemed to have caught that drift and slightly kicked Hermione beneath the table, eyeing the tea-cup insinuating for her to make a cup. Taking the attention away from Hermione, she looked up at her father who seemed to not notice the interaction between his daughter and her friend. "Is Mother taking breakfast in her room this morning, then?"

He waved his hand, "Yes. But I'm sure if she had known you've company, she'd be down here."

Narcissa shrugged, "Hermione showed up early this morning. Bit of shopping planned today."

Cygnus nodded, "Why've we not met you before, Miss Granger?"

Gulping down her tea, she sketched her eyes to Narcissa, who was glad to answer. "Oh, she's an old friend. We just came across each other for the first time in forever a few weeks ago! Made plans to spend time together."

 _This was going completely different from the plan she and Regulus had,_ Hermione thought.

"She was in the same ballet class I took when we visited France during the summers, Daddy. She was a student at Beauxbatons as well, weren't you, Hermione?" Narcissa played.

 _Never mind. This was going to be a disaster. "_ Yes. I lived in France with my parents. Only came here when my grandfather passed and I've decided to elongate my stay."

Cygnus nodded. "Never had the pleasure of meeting the potioneer but he did great things for the Pureblood community. So, are you engaged to be wed, Miss Granger?"

Narcissa scoffed, "Oh, Daddy. Please don't harp on her, too. Sorry, Hermione, my parents are on a mission to get me married off."

Hermione looked down at her tea. The brown liquid held her reflection in a grotesque manner. She had no clue on how to answer. The door to the dining room opened once more and in came... " _Regulus_ ," she said with a smile.

Cygnus looked back and forth between the two, "Well, I suspect that answers my question. You and Regulus, then?"

Regulus smirked, "Good morning to you, Uncle Cygnus… are you interrogating _my_ Hermione?"

 _Now wait just a second! What were these two playing at?_ Hermione felt her anger rise, but the blush was played off by the embarrassment of Regulus sitting beside her and placing a chaste kiss upon her cheek. He lingered a little longer than she would have liked and he whispered, his lip barely grazing her lobe. " _I'll explain later."_ She looked across the table at Narcissa who grinned, acting as if nothing was amiss.

Cygnus chuckled, "My, your mother will be in a strop when she finds out that she's missed such a gathering. And that _I_ have gotten to meet Reg's intended before her."

"That's her doing, Daddy. She is perfectly capable of coming downstairs and eating with us. Instead, she chooses to stay in her room," Narcissa said nonchalantly.

The older man nodded, "The way of it, dear girl. You'll do the same once you're married. Which should be soon."

Narcissa whooped out a laugh. "I imagine I'll want to spend all my time with the ones I love. And, Daddy, now that Regulus is fully intended with the lovely Hermione… it means I am still without a future husband."

"Don't start, Narcissa," Cygnus said coldly.

Hermione situated herself in her chair as the conversation was starting to taking an unexpected turn. Narcissa's life would carry on very differently, but all the same, _but what will it take to get it there?_

"How about you, Miss Granger?" Cygnus stirred the conversation toward her. "Does your mother eat breakfast in bed?"

Hermione thought of her mother for the first time in a while and it took everything inside of her not to shed a tear. " _Er,_ well, no. My mum sat with us," she answered. "She's passed on though. As has my father."

Cygnus bowed his head, "My apologies and condolences."

Hermione felt Regulus reach beneath the table and give her knee a tight squeeze. She looked over at him, but she couldn't give him a smile. She casually pushed Reg's hand away and turned back to Cygnus. "It's all right, sir. No harm in your curiosity."

"Well, children, I have a lot to do today, so you lot have a good one. See you again, Miss Granger. Regulus, Narcissa." He set his napkin down and left the room.

Awkward silence.

Narcissa set her butter knife aside and sat a little taller. Regulus leaned back into his chair. They waited for Hermione to say something, but she didn't say a word. She continued nursing her tea, looking at everything else but them; knowing they were sharing looks to determine who would say something first. After minutes of this, Narcissa finally took the initiative to speak. "I'm sorry, Hermione. Regulus and I weren't meaning to use you in such a way…"

Hermione continued to look away from them. Regulus turned his body toward her, " _Granger_ —"

"Don't," she said.

"Please talk to me," he started.

She rounded her body to him, "Regulus, if you would have just asked for my help, you know I would have given it. After everything that I have asked of you, you should know that I'd be here for you. But instead you and _you —"_ she looked over to Narcissa, "used me! I would have gladly helped you in whatever messy plan you would have concocted because you have been nothing but accepting towards me!"

"Darling, please don't be like that!" Narcissa began. "Reg and I get caught up into the moment sometimes and we didn't think outside of ourselves. Please forgive us."

Hermione stood from her chair, "I really need to get going."

Regulus stood with her, "Please, don't go. I have the book, we can—"

 _Damn. The book on bonds._ She had forgotten as she was so caught up in _this_.

Hermione rolled her eyes. She knew she couldn't just take the book from him and do it on her own. He was a part of this… she needed his magic as well. She glanced over at Narcissa, who was staring up with apologetic eyes. "Hermione, really… we weren't trying to _hurt_ you. We should've run it by you, but we just didn't have the time."

"You could have made time. While Siggy was doing my hair. While we were chatting this morning. There was plenty of time that it could have been slipped: _Hey, by the way, could you possibly play my ex-fiancée's new intended?_ It wouldn't have been hard to do! I would have said yes!" Hermione flustered. "Then to put me on spot like that, without really knowing what to do or say or expect, it was wrong."

Regulus looked down to his feet. "I'm sorry, Hermione. Please, I beg of you to forgive me." He reached out to touch her, but she stepped away with his every stride.

"Could you please give me a moment? I need to think… I haven't had the chance to think since I've been _here_ ," she said, and Regulus understood exactly what she meant.

"Of course," he answered.

Narcissa stood. "You may use my room or the garden. But if you step out there, you have the chance of running into my mother. So my room is probably your best bet."

Hermione nodded and left. As soon as the door closed and her steps were out of earshot, Narcissa looked to her cousin. " _You_ are in love with her, Dear Cousin."

Regulus' face went pale.

"Why don't you just tell her?" Narcissa pressed.

Regulus sat back down into his chair and faced his older cousin. "I am not in love with her. Don't be stupid."

Narcissa was taken aback. "Regulus Black, I have never seen you squirm in your seat over someone _ever._ Or the way you lingered by her ear as you whispered. Your pupils widen when you look at her. It's all there. You are in love with her."

He rolled his eyes, "Even if I were, there isn't anything I can do about it."

Narcissa looked bemused, "I don't understand your logic. She is a single woman, she is your friend, in some way that I will not understand, as you Regulus don't make friends outside the Pureblood community. So, either she has something on you and you're trying to blackmail her _or_ you're absolutely infatuated."

He chuckled darkly, "Oh, Narcissa, you think you have all the answers to the secrets of the world. But you don't know the first thing. _Even_ if I did love her, I couldn't."

"Why?"

" _Sirius_ ," he answered openly.

Narcissa furrowed her brows, "Yes. I am serious… why can't you love her?"

Regulus scoffed, "No, you daft, girl. _Sirius_ … my brother."

Understanding her mix-up, Narcissa continued, "What does he have to do with her?"

" _She_ doesn't know it yet, but she's absolutely in love with _him_ ," Regulus answered. "Do you think it's too early for whiskey?" The thought made him sick. He was just belittling his own father for the same thing.

Narcissa nodded skeptically, "Way too early. Regulus… what are you doing with her if she is involved with Sirius? If your parents found out…"

"It's a lot more complicated than I can begin to explain. I promise you that," he said, tapping his fingers over the clothed table.

The blonde leaned over, touching his hand goodnaturedly, "Then help me understand."

He turned his hand palm up, taking Narcissa's small one into his own. "That, _darling_ , is up to Hermione."


	20. If I Only Could

Hermione felt horrible. She knew Sirius was probably worried sick over her, and being away without any word to him was unacceptable. He had been there for her when she had fallen ill. Things were beginning to become more serious between them. As much as she felt like she needed to fight it, she found that she couldn't...and didn't want to.

Sirius was her comfort here. He brought her happiness and made her forget all the horrid things that were buried inside of her. She looked out the window into the garden of the estate, taking in the scenery. But no matter how beautiful the flowers were, her mind swirled with thoughts of him. She needed to talk to Sirius. She needed to tell him the truth, because knowing him, he would've been there at the hospital this morning waiting to see her. She could picture it — him being told that she was discharged the night before. Wondering why she hadn't come home… _to him._ She pressed her hand against her chest, feeling a slight squeeze to her heart. She need to be here with Regulus to get a lesson in understanding the bonds… no way around it. It could help further what needed to be done to fix the past; to change the future…

" _Narcissa, I'm leaving. I'll be back this evening,"_ she heard an older woman call, then a door close.

Hermione turned and found herself looking into the mirror. Though the dress was beautiful and her hair looked lovely: this wasn't her. And now, Regulus has introduced her as the one he's been courting… that was definitely not something she signed up for, but in all honesty, she didn't mind to help him in the matter. Being asked properly would've been nice. She crossed her arms, more so to hug herself. It just meant more time away from Sirius and more lies… _how many more lies?_

She turned to the door opening and in walked Narcissa. "Hermione, do you want to talk?"

Hermione shook her head, "Not really… but seeing as you're here, I'm guessing you're not really giving me the option are you?"

Narcissa sighed and stepped inside to sit on her bed. "I was honest downstairs… we weren't putting you in an awkward position to be cruel. I guess it was kind of mine and Regulus's way to be absolutely sure you were on our side and that we could trust you. Well, more me, than him," she said.

Hermione sat down on the chair at the vanity, placing her hands on her thighs. "Regulus is a dear friend to me. I would be happy to help him in anyway shape or form. I owe a lot to him… and he knows that. I just figured he would have been kind enough to ask for my help instead of just assuming I'd do whatever it is he had up his sleeve. Just the illusion of consideration is what counts."

"I understand. I am sorry and so is he," Narcissa said, not unkindly. "We can't keep apologizing or else we'd be doing it forever. You'll have to decide whether or not you forgive us and move on from it. Or you'll need to leave and never look back. Being a part of this life, there are things that _are_ required and, as much as I despise it, it's just the way of it."

Hermione scoffed, "I never agreed to be a _part_ of this life! I fell into Regulus on a whim for something stupid!" _That wasn't entirely a lie_. "Though, I don't regret it. I didn't sign up to be a puppet on his arm. I didn't sign up to dress in pretty dresses and act as if I am something I am not."

Narcissa sighed, "We play a game to keep sane as well as to get what we want… you're welcome here because I like you. You're not here to play a puppet. You're not here to be something you're not. You fit in quite well, actually. Don't scoff, it's true, whether you like it or not…

"But, if you're here because you need Regulus, then you shouldn't feel so swept in the fact that he needed you. It was a sore accident that he didn't ask properly for your help, however, if you care about him at all, you wouldn't be whining about it."

Hermione felt a bit stupid, she didn't really think of it this way. _I'm losing my footing here._

"I like you, Hermione. I am your friend. I have liked you ever since that day I met you in that Muggle shop and what's more, Regulus adores you. He's beating himself up about the whole mess."

Hermione raised a brow. "He shouldn't be."

"Ah. But he is. Regulus cares about you more than he lets on, darling," Narcissa said. "Now. I don't want to talk about what happened anymore because if we continue on, we won't get past it. Again, I am sorry. And, on behalf of my cousin, he is sorry as well."

Hermione contemplated the situation. Of course she wanted to talk about it more… but she knew if she did, she'd just go in circles and Narcissa was right: they'd continue to apologize until Hermione said all was well even if it wasn't. She nodded in the end though. "Alright."

Narcissa smiled with pride, "Good. Now I have to ask… why does Regulus have a very ancient book about bonds that hasn't been opened in many, many, many years?"

Hermione felt her throat go dry. She hadn't really planned on telling Narcissa about the whole situation as it was just too much to get into… so how would she explain the book? "Well… how can I know I can trust you?"

Slightly taken aback with the question, Narcissa raised a brow and said casually, "I guess you'll just have to trust me to know."

Hermione stood from the chair and moved over to the bed to sit beside Narcissa. She took the woman's hands into her own, "I want to tell you, Narcissa. I want to be honest with you in every way possible. But right now, I am asking you to trust _me_ when I say, I can't tell you right now… but when the time comes, I will do my best in explaining everything to you." _I can't wait to meet you, Hermione Granger._ Those same blue eyes looked at her all the same: full of questions, secrets…

The blonde wasn't displeased, but not exactly pleased either with the request. "Does Regulus know?"

"Know what?"

"Know why you're needing the book of bonds?" Narcissa answered.

Hermione nodded. "Regulus and I came together for reasons I can't explain. Look, Narcissa, I know you're protective of him… I understand because I feel the same way. He's my friend."

Dismissively, the woman said, "You two can use my room. My parents are out for the rest of the day and we aren't expecting any visitors." She stood to leave. Her whole demeanor changed now, less pleasant.

Hermione started to feel guilty. Narcissa was just as important to her as Regulus and Sirius were… and Narcissa was more accepting toward her than either of the Black Brothers in the start _. I hope I don't regret this._ "Wait."

The blonde turned around, "Yes?"

"You can stay. I just really need to know that anything you find out here today, you can't repeat, _ever_ outside of you, me, and Regulus." Hermione said.

Narcissa raised her wand with a brilliant smile upon her lips, "I swear on my magic!" A spark flew from the top.

And that's all it took. Hermione believed that Narcissa Black was on her side.

Regulus entered the room moments later. "You ready?"

Hermione nodded, "Yes. Narcissa will be joining us."

The man raised his brows in surprise. "You're sure?"

"Absolutely."

The three of them sat down in the middle of the floor, Narcissa threw a spell over her shoulder to lock the door. For the first time in many years, the book of bonds was opened. They each shared a wondrous look. The pages were crisp, a little yellow, and smelled of dust. The first ten pages were blank — _waste of paper,_ Hermione thought, until finally Regulus began to read:

" _To expose the bonds of one witch or wizard, they must be willing to open their soul to the universe. The revealer should lay alone or with lovers and friends around them as those present reach forward and place their own or the others' hands upon the revealer's body, remaining in a state of serene calm."_ Regulus glanced up at Hermione, "How does that sound?"

Hermione shrugged, "Doesn't sound too bad… what else does it say? Are there any chants or colors we need to be looking for?"

Narcissa leaned over her cousin's shoulder and pointed to the next paragraph. "Yes. It says that once we place our hands upon you, we let all of our magic combine, and in unison we say, _May the bonds reveal._ That seems simple enough as long as all of our minds are in the proper place as well."

Hermione nodded.

Regulus read again, " _It will seem as if the body will become translucent as a surge of power will engulf it and release colored strands of light. Each color will represent the nature of the bond to whom they reach…"_ Regulus licked his fingers, then turned the page. " _Blue means Marital."_

Hermione cleared her throat, "Well, that one isn't needed. How about we just focus on the familial bonds and friendships…" She didn't notice the peculiar eye that Narcissa was giving her. "Does it say anything about the light reaching the other individuals?"

"Uhh…" he held the book before him, skimming the pages, "it doesn't say. But I guess we will find out, won't we?"

Her face was tell-all, however, Narcissa needed the specifics of her silent anxiety. "What's wrong?"

"I was only wondering because the people it will reach outside of this room will be hit with a spiral of my soul," Hermione answered truthfully.

"We don't have to do this," Reg said comfortingly.

"I know. But we need to know _why_ ," Hermione answered.

Narcissa sat up a little taller, "Why what?"

Shakily, Hermione told Narcissa about Regulus being her next of kin at the hospital.

"That is interesting… and only Regulus was listed?" Narcissa inquired.

"Yes."

"Well, let's find out, shall we?" Narcissa helped Hermione lay down on the floor.

Regulus laid a hand on Hermione's shoulder as Narcissa did the same on the opposite. They each said, " _May the bonds reveal…"_ then Regulus spoke, reading from the book: " _Rest your hands at your side, close your eyes… picture a grassy field, filled with yellow flowers… a breeze calming you… faces appear around you… these are your friends…"_

Hermione felt a sudden warmth engulfing her body, different Magics intertwining within her own. Regulus and Narcissa watched as yellow tendrils of light spread over Hermione's body and right into their own souls. More flew past them and out the window, reaching far distances. _She was clothed in a yellow dress, her feet were bare. She felt the soft grass beneath her toes as familiar faces danced toward her._

 _Remus was there, smiling as he waved at her. She spun around, Narcissa was twirling the yellow flowers into crowns; laying one atop of her own head, then reaching forward to place one on Hermione's. Walking toward Hermione was Regulus, he held a bright smile as he took her hand into his own. She kept looking around for more familiar faces, but none ever showed. No Harry. No Ron… nor James or Lily… perhaps her a bond hadn't been met wholly for them yet._

 _The beautiful flowers and the field began to fade away and into a dark mass, fire engulfing the corners. Her yellow dress was now a harshly cut black frock, fitted out for doing battle and her wand steady in her hand. Marlene McKinnon's face appeared. She was angry and pushed past Hermione with anguish. This was her enemy. She looked around for other people, like Bellatrix Lestrange but her face never showed. Was it because she hadn't met her here yet?_

 _She left that place and entered into a realm that held a pathway to a green door; she was clothed in a mossy green flowing dress. She opened the door, walking inside a home, one she hadn't ever seen before._

 _Family._

 _Regulus' face appeared once again… Narcissa's… then another: Sirius_. _He was holding out his arms toward her. He blessed her lips with a kiss… she wanted to pull away — this was a family affair. Which is why she was brought to this in the first place._

 _She looked around for more faces, but she was beginning to realize they would only appear as long as the bond was formed. She knew Harry and Ron should be here… but since they were gone… she went back to Sirius. She opened her mouth to ask questions but no sound escaped._

 _The home disappeared. A change of pace and tone flitted through her body. She couldn't open her eyes to see what was going on, but she knew Narcissa was speaking now… the sky blue. Her clothes were blue… Hermione rolled her eyes as she looked over a balcony into a dark blue sea._

Narcissa and Regulus observed as a heavy blue spiral shot from Hermione's chest; their eyes wide as they watched it escape through the window.

Pissed off, across town, Sirius stood with his back against a shaded tree, smoking a cigarette when an odd blue light harmlessly struck him. He jumped back, holding out his wand, ready to aim, and to fight anyone who was threatening him. However after moments of moving from side to side, the light wasn't removing itself from his body. He waved through it with his hand, touching it without consequence. Giving into his curious nature, he began to follow it. He walked with the blue light (which he hoped only he could see — or else people might be looking at him as if he were mad). After a few miles, he stopped on a familiar road, before an old house he'd been to many a times, but long, long ago. "You've got to be fucking kidding me."

"What are you doing?" Regulus asked Narcissa.

"Keep your focus, Reg. We need answers."

"She isn't married, Cissa…" he replied incredulously.

"Her Magic thinks otherwise, but I don't think that she is even aware," Narcissa countered. "There's more to this story than the both of you know. And with me, we are going to get to the bottom of it."

"Oh, Master Sirius… you are… here?" Siggy opened the door to the man with a blue tendril of light flowing from his chest. She allowed him to pass through as he continued to follow the light up the stairs.

 _Hermione walked and walked. It was really beautiful here; she'd never known how many blue flowers there were. She'd never seen a blue bird so closely before, perched on a bath. She didn't mind it here; it was serene, happy… but she was confused as to why she was still there. She blatantly told Narcissa and Regulus that she wasn't married, so why were they even playing with the idea?_

A knock on the door of the bedroom came, causing Regulus to stir.

"I'll keep her here, answer the door," the blonde said, observing Hermione with awe.

"Why? What if it's your mum or dad?" Suddenly his nerves were in a knot.

"No. Siggy would have told me. Answer the door, Regulus. I think someone is here to see her," Narcissa said plainly, tilting her head at the latter witch.

"Have you gone scatty in that pretty little brain of yours? What if we're inviting in trouble?" Regulus asked. He wasn't sure if it was the possibility of finding out Hermione was really married. Or the possibility of actual trouble. Along with the fact that Hermione was from the future! Whatever — _whoever_ was behind that door would change things immensely.

"Just answer the door, Regulus. Siggy wouldn't have allowed anyone into my home if there was a threat of danger."

 _Hermione stopped at the edge of the water, letting the waves flow over her feet. She barely noticed the familiar touch upon her shoulders or the soft kisses that touched her neck. She leant into them, until the realization hit her. She spun around so fast and looked up into the blue eyes…_

"S-Sirius?" Regulus stepped back, his eyes crossing from him to the woman on the floor.

Narcissa removed her hand from Hermione and crossed her arms as she looked up at her estranged cousin. "Well, I'll be damned."

"What the fuck is going on here?" Sirius asked angrily. His eyes widening when he saw Hermione sitting up slowly from her position.

"Oh my—" Hermione started. "Sirius what — how did you… what are you doing here?"

Narcissa smirked knowingly, "Looks like the two of you are—"

"Married," Regulus finished.


	21. Allegiance to the Pain

Sirius watched the bathroom door, waiting for it to open. He didn't know what he'd feel once he'd see Hermione come through. _How dare she!_ He was so angry at her — and for reasons he didn't even understand!

He hazarded a glance at his brother, who wasn't looking back at him, but was instead staring at the floor with a look of uncertainty.

It had been a long time since they had spoken to one another, years. There was such strong antipathy from Sirius's side that Regulus was almost afraid to say anything, but he couldn't help but feel angered by the judgmental looks his sibling was throwing his way. "Are you going to say something or continue to stare at me like you want to kill me?" Regulus finally said in a low tone.

Taken aback, but unsurprised by the animosity, Sirius couldn't find his voice to say anything. It wasn't like _him_ to lower his eyes from an enemy. Everything happened so fast that he couldn't properly process what exactly was going on, what to do, or what to even say. He tried to listen to what Narcissa and Hermione were saying behind the door, but their voices were muffled.

He leaned back against the wall, crossing his arms. _Married? Married to Hermione? What the bleeding hell was going on?_ Had his family procured a marriage agreement before he was born and just not got tell him since he was cut from the family tree? _No. That agreement would have been broken once he broke ties._ He began to feel faint and threw his hand out to the wall to hold himself up, but even it began to feel wobbly.

" _Sirius?"_

The man swallowed the thick, sour taste hard down his throat and glanced over to Regulus.

"What?" he asked coldly.

"You look as if you're about to fall over. Do you need some help, man?" Regulus answered in the same demeanor as his brother.

"No. Why the _fuck_ would I want help from you?"

Regulus scoffed. "Right. Why would you want help? Why are you even here?"

Sirius jolted upright, "Oh, I don't know, perhaps it's because I was enjoying myself a smoke after a fucked up morning...something you may know all about, as Hermione was discharged from Mungo's due to being related to you, but somehow not to me?" He shrugged dramatically, "When all of a sudden my chest was struck out of nowhere with a blue light." He thumped himself hard with his palm. "So instead of letting it go, curiosity got the best of me and I decided to follow it, and good bloody thing I did, because it led me to apparently my backstabbing wife, cunt of a cousin, and lowlife of a brother."

Anger boiled within Regulus. Normally he wouldn't care if Sirius talked shit toward him or about him, but when he heard him malign Hermione's character, he felt the urge to strike. He knew it wouldn't make matters better, though it'd make _him_ feel better, but it would anger Hermione. Aside from consideration for her, he also needed answers. Without Sirius, that wouldn't happen.

Rubbing the stubble on his chin, Sirius finally asked, "Are you going to tell me what is going on?"

"Your question is just the same as mine, brother."

"You're no brother to me," Sirius spat.

Gritting his teeth, Regulus thought back to what Hermione had said about Sirius really loving him and how he was killing himself over not forgiving Regulus when he had the chance. He started to wonder if it were all a lie…but he knew better. Hermione had been under the Vow: she couldn't lie.

"That's fine. I am no brother to you." He shrugged then pointed to the bathroom, "But that woman in there is a dear friend to me and obviously someone to you. So if you want answers to your questions, man the fuck up. We will know what is going on once she is ready to come out here and tell us," Regulus said, with a lot more courage than he was feeling. He noticed Sirius's eyes widen and was surprised that the man didn't come back with a rebuttal. Instead, Sirius leaned against the wall and crossed his arms, his expression cold and hard.

….

Inside the bathroom, Hermione's head hung within the rim of the porcelain bowl, intermittently spewing what little her stomach contained. Yellow bile bubbled in the water, mixing with the snot that dropped from her nose. She shook, her body covered in goosebumps, as if she were freezing. Her mind was forcing itself into a state of shock as her thoughts crammed together.

 _Please wake up, please wake up… please… let this all be a dream. I'm going to wake up in my bed at my home under my warm baby blue comforter. The sun is going to peek through the shades, my mother is going to call for me any moment to tell me that breakfast is ready. Harry and Ron are alive… it's all going to be okay. Everything is going to be o—_ Her thoughts were interrupted when she felt a calming hand on her shoulder bringing her forth to reality.

She opened her eyes to find Narcissa kneeling beside her, and she fell back to the heels of her feet, settling her elbows into her knees as she cupped her chin into her hands and whispered. "What the hell is happening? What am I going to do?"

"Maybe you can tell me what is going on so I can help you…" the blonde said softly.

Hermione rubbed her eyes until they were bloodshot, then turned to Narcissa with her index fingers pressing hard into her temples, "Oh, Narcissa… oh my God…" she started to cry.

The latter's face was gentle, but held fear, "What is it? You're starting to scare me." Which meant a lot-Narcissa was a hard one to frighten.

"I need to tell the both of you. Sirius and you, I mean. He deserves to know as well." _He was supposed to be the only one to know._

The women rose to their feet, taking each other's hands, but before the left the room, Narcissa pulled Hermione into a hug, "As I said before, I don't judge you, Hermione Granger. I am your friend and I am _so happy to have met you."_ Hermione fell into Narcissa's chest with deep heavy cries, her arms were weak, but she pressed her hands into the blonde's back to pull her closer. Sobbing, she remembered the day she left the woman in 1998.

"Please, don't ever leave me, okay?" Hermione whispered. "Please, no matter what happens, don't ever leave our friendship."

Narcissa nodded against the woman's hair and whispered, "No matter what, I promise I won't leave."

After a few moments of just them hugging, Hermione finally found the strength to step away from their embrace. Narcissa pushed back tendrils of her friend's hair to behind her ear, "I'm ready when you are."

….

Sirius and Regulus looked up to the bathroom door to first see their cousin exiting, then the woman they both were so enamoured with.

Regulus wanted to go to her, to hold her, and brush the remains of her tears away.

Sirius felt the overwhelming urge to take her by her hand and get the hell out of there. No matter what she had done, they could get past it. Sure, he was angry right now, but seeing her so sad… that hurt worse.

Hermione held herself a little taller than she was feeling. She first looked to Regulus and gave him a nod, telling him it was time to reveal the secret. In return, he glanced to his brother, who was now glaring at the exchange between them.

Hermione caught the envy in Sirius's gaze. He turned to her and everything fell into slow motion. _Is this the right thing to do? Will this change the course of history? Will too many people know?_ Pressure rose on her chest, _Will this change her future — their futures?_

"Sirius…" she began quietly. "As you may be aware, I haven't been quite honest with you."

"I'll say," he interrupted dispassionately.

Hermione sighed, "Please," she spoke before Regulus could, holding a lowered hand toward him. "It's all right, Reg."

Sirius rolled his eyes condescendingly.

"Could you sit… please. We would all feel a lot more comfortable — _I_ would fee—"

" _Comfort?!"_ Sirius laughed. "Comfort? You think I fucking care about bloody comfort, Hermione?! Do you see me? Who I am around right now?" He hadn't quite told her everything yet, but since she was _dear friends_ with these people, she probably had his life story.

She ignored that. She cleared her throat and began, "Sirius Orion Black… first born to Orion and Walburga."

 _Exactly. Just what I thought._ He recrossed his arms and chuckled darkly. "This is information you can find in the public records at the Ministry, Hermione."

 _Ugh._ She really hated it when he called her by her name now. She was _Ace_ to him… not the harsh _Hermione_ that dropped from his tongue like a swear. "You're absolutely right. Allow me to begin again, Mr. _Black_." Inwardly she couldn't help but smile at Sirius's face at her use of his surname. "My name is Hermione Jean Granger. I am nineteen years of age. I am from the year 1998."

A clattering from Hermione's right dispersed the silence. Narcissa had lost grip of her tea cup, a hand now placed over her mouth in shock.

Sirius dropped his arms and removed himself from the wall angrily, a look of pure terror and outrage covered his features.

Regulus gripped his wand, ready to battle his brother if the need arose.

Coughing, trying to gather her breath, Narcissa was able to ask, "What… what exactly do you mean?"

Hermione turned her head slightly toward her shoulder, "Exactly as I said it. I am from 1998. I was sent back to change things."

"What needs to be changed?" Narcissa asked, "Who sent you back?"

Before Hermione could answer, Sirius started speaking again, his voice laced with hurt and betrayal. "I let you into my home."

"You begged me to stay," she countered. "I told you I was looking for a place. I tried to say no. You insisted."

"I let you meet my friends, people who are my family. You went into their home—"

"You asked me," Hermione said. "I didn't _want_ to go. I _never_ asked!"

Then Hermione's heart broke into pieces when Sirius's voice cracked, so emotion filled his words. "I slept with you."

"I didn't—" she started.

"I fell _in love_ with you!" he finished. The air was thick with remorse, awkward silences, envy.

Tears formed over Hermione's lashline, "I never asked you to." She had to look away from him. The hurt in his eyes was breaking her.

She almost didn't hear him when he said, "You didn't have to, Ace." He said it so calmly, it was eerie.

In her peripheral, she saw Regulus's head drop, then heard Narcissa clear her throat.

"I don't know what you want me to say to that, Sirius." Hermione's voice was just above a whisper.

"You know Hermione, you can't say anything… because I can't believe a word that comes from your mouth. You're a liar."

"That is not true, Sirius," Narcissa spoke up finally. "She did what she had to do to keep herself safe — to find out if she could trust you."

"Oh, so she can trust the likes of you two then?" he countered.

"No. I am only just now finding this all out like you."

He scowled, "Wow, the Ancient and Noble House of Black must've really stooped in its beliefs if you're so willingly to believe this rubbish." He pointed at Hermione as he faced his cousin, "You're telling me that you believe this woman travelled in time, in the amount of nineteen years, no less… from the future? It's impossible."

Regulus had stood on the sideline long enough. He hated how much Sirius was doubting Hermione when he knew with all his heart that she wasn't lying. He hated seeing how sad and guilty she looked and knew how she was feeling. He wanted to hold her, press his lips against her forehead, and whisper that everything would be okay. "It is possible," he said.

Sirius rolled his eyes, "Really? You the one who sent her back then? You watch it happen?"

"No. However, Hermione and I made an Unbreakable," Regulus said, with a little more smugness than he intended, but the way his brother squirmed at that bit of information was quite satisfying.

Flabbergasted at this, Sirius turned back to Hermione, "Why him? Why couldn't you come to me?"

"I was going to, Sirius!" she choked, "You were supposed to be the only one to know. Circumstances changed, Reg got to me first."

"How?"

 _Damn him!_ Hermione just wanted to hug him and tell him how sorry she was. Her chest was tight, her airways felt restricted; much like when she awoke in his arms the other morning. This was too much. She wasn't here to feel this way. She was here to fix things, not cause bigger problems! She knew there were feelings that needed to be discussed, now more than ever after this. But they needed to focus on the task at hand for now — not the love that now felt lost between them.

"Sirius, you mean the world to me and I want to talk about everything that pertains to us, and if you will allow it, after I explain everything here, I will discuss whatever you want to later. No lies, I will be honest with you from every aspect… if you're willing to listen." The bubbles of emotion were clawing their way out. She tried so hard to keep those sobs locked inside of her, but when he looked at her with pure disappointment and resentment, it fell from her mouth, and she was too slow to cover it with her hand.

Narcissa placed her hands on both of Hermione's shoulders from behind and whispered, "Reg and I can go…"

Hermione shook her head, "No: absolutely not. You deserve to hear what I need to say. He and I can wait until later." At that moment, she didn't realize that she had internally been avoiding Regulus. She looked over to him, into eyes that held a look of discomfort.

"Just say it, Hermione," Sirius said.

"I was about to be killed when I was rescued." She grabbed one of Narcissa's hands and brought her close to her. "Then I was sent back here by Narcissa." She didn't want to mention the fact that she was married to Lucius yet, as that would steer the discussion into a completely different direction.

Sirius gaped at the blonde. Where had she developed such power and knowledge to do such a thing? And better yet, why? "What was going on in the first place for that to even be necessary?"

"I told you before Sirius. I may have lied about names and twisted my tales to fit this timeline, but I never lied about what happened. Voldemort is still very much alive in 1998. He's won. Narcissa sent me here to try and fix things. To defeat him." The anger boiled inside of her, the thought of Voldemort made her blood run hot.

Sirius scoffed, "And how exactly can a one-woman-show like yourself take on one of the darkest wizards of our time all alone? The fucking Auror teams from all over have been trying to take him down and can't even do it. So, why are you so special?"

Hermione tried her best to ignore the animosity that seeped from Sirius's lips. She really wanted to waltz over to him and smack the shit out of him, but with the way he was acting, things could escalate in an entirely different way. She knew that Sirius wouldn't lay a hand on a woman out of anger… but she wasn't just any woman anymore. "I'm _not_ special. I need help, of course. Which is why I am here. I was going to come to you. The night you met me, I knew exactly who you were." _And just for that moment, you made me the happiest I'd been in a long time,_ she wanted to say. "But I needed you to trust me, I needed to know that I could trust you. Like I could then… in 1998. I wanted to build a friendship with you… however, I didn't take the right precautions when I was doing my research. I gave myself away and Regulus got to me before I could get to you. However, I knew I could trust him because of what I knew from the future. I knew where his true loyalties lay."

Sirius threw his hands into the air, "You're not completely answering my question, Hermione. Why you? What do you have to defeat him? If you couldn't defeat him in your time, what makes you think you can do it in this timeline? And why the hell are the good guys fighting him now?! How many lives do we have to continue to lose and risk for this to just keep on nineteen fucking years later?"

"Because, now, I know his weaknesses, where as then, I was still learning! We were too late then! Now we can hit him and he wouldn't even know it."

Sirius laughed, his laughter held such malice, it frightened her. "Well to put it plainly, these two here are your enemy. They are loyal to no one but the fucked up lineage of The Ancient and Noble House of Fucking Black."

"Then I guess they are loyal to me, aren't they?" Hermione spat. "Since apparently I am one. Since apparently I am married to you, and since my next of kin is Regulus."

Regulus sniggered catching Sirius's attention, they challenged each other with a stare down until Narcissa spoke up, "Okay gentleman, lower your testosterone. Hermione," she turned to the younger witch, "how did I send you back?"

This was a question she had been dreading. "The Black Family Time-Turner," she answered.

Narcissa's and Sirius's brows furrowed, nearly identical lines creasing their foreheads, showing that they were indeed kin. When it became apparent that Hermione knew what she was talking about, Sirius turned to his cousin and asked, "How'd you manage that?"

She rubbed her temples in circles, "I really have no idea, Sirius. Obviously." She then rolled her eyes and huffed, "I know the same amount of information that you do. Do you have any idea, Hermione?"

The woman shrugged, "I haven't an idea. It was just handed over to me and I was given instructions."

"I need a cigarette," Sirius started toward the door.

"Okay," Hermione said cautiously. "But, please. I am begging you, don't tell anyone what you know, Sirius. If anyone outside of us found out… it could be catastrophic."

"It goes without saying, Hermione…," Narcissa began, "but I swore to you and on my magic… your secret is safe with me."

Sirius didn't turn back around to face any of them, but with a low growl he murmured, "I still have questions. I won't say anything."

"Make a vow," Regulus began.

"No," Hermione said. "I trust him."

Then Sirius walked out the door, slamming it behind him.


	22. Nothin' But My Aching Soul

_Shit_. He lit his cigarette as he crossed the street. _Shit, shit, shit!_ He leaned against a tree that faced his cousin's home.

So many questions lined up in his head. Was Hermione really a good person? That night they met, she'd known it was him… had she known him in the future? Is that why they were married? _Hermione_ — _why her of all people to send back?_

 _And since when did Regulus switch sides? Narcissa, little miss princess of the Black family, what made her change her mind? Daddy stop giving her what she wanted?_

His mind spun back to Hermione, as he threw the butt of his cigarette to the ground and kneeled, cupping his face in the palm of his hands. Where did their relationship stand? Did he even want one anymore? Should he report her to the Aurors? _Can I just send her back? Would I want to?_ Could he live with that, knowing there were numerous lives that could be saved.

Would it change the future if he sent her back? What about the marriage… _would we be married still? When did we get married? Do I even want to be married to her?_ How did it even come to be? And if that was the case, _why was it Regulus was the next of kin and not me?_

He felt his cheeks heat up when the image of her face flashed before his eyes when he admitted to telling her he loved her for the first time. _It wasn't supposed to go like that._ It was meant to be a special moment… _if that moment ever comes…_

He was so angry. At her for not telling him. At himself for not catching it. Reaching into his pocket, he retrieved another cigarette and lit it up. The voice in his head started in on him and said: _Well, look at your reaction, mate. Do you blame her for not trusting you enough yet?_ He closed his eyes and he inhaled the toxins of his addiction. He needed to speak to her alone, away from the people he'd once called family. _Why does she trust them?_

 _Dammit!_ He knew the Black Family scent was upon her… he knew it was there, but he'd disregarded it, especially since his canine senses held nothing against her as a bad person.

Now he was ready to hit something. Now he wanted to break her fucking heart like she'd done to him. Then the memory hit him, not that long ago, he told her he'd like to have sent her back into time, the morning she spilled coffee on him because she was _reading a time traveling book! Shit!_ All the signs were there!

He started laughing in delusion — _a girl with just one bag and the clothes on her back._

….

Hermione sat on Narcissa's bed, cradling her head in her hands. The room was quiet. Narcissa didn't say much as she was lost inside of her own mind. Every time she went to ask a question, she'd open her mouth just to close it again.

Regulus cautiously moved to Hermione and kneeled before her. He reached up and gently tore her hands away from her face, placing them into his own. "You okay? I know it's probably a dumb question… but I just need to know how you're feeling."

Hermione had learned to work her face into hiding her feelings well over the years, especially since she used to be bullied so badly by people like Pansy Parkinson or Draco… but tonight, she couldn't bring her expression to blankness. She could feel it wanting to contour into all sorts of different directions, whether it be to smile, to frown, raise her eyebrows, or to hold it blank. The muscles in her cheeks were shaking. "He wasn't… supposed to find out this way." She lowered her chin and shook her head, "I hurt him and I hate myself for it. He will never trust me again. Hell, I wouldn't trust me. Not after a blow like that. He probably hates me."

Regulus sighed, "That's not true and you know it. I mean… you two are married, so obviously something has to work out between you, right?"

Hermione scoffed, "I don't know, for all we know this whole incident could've changed things dramatically… also, I have no plans to marry Sirius. I haven't read about it in any of Narcissa's diaries, yet."

Hearing this, Narcissa jerked her head to Hermione, "I..diaries? What do you mean?"

Hermione had almost forgotten the woman was still in the room with them. "Oh. Just that in 1998, you had given me your diaries to help me here, for research purposes… really."

The blonde's cheeks reddened, she knew exactly what she had written inside those bloody journals… _how bloody embarrassing_. "That is… wow! Really?"

Hermione, understanding her predicament, half-heartedly smiled, "Yes; no worries though. No judgement here. You're welcome to look through them, but you have your own…"

Surprisingly, Narcissa shook her head, "No. You know I have been sitting here for the past hour asking myself if I wanted to know anything about the future but I keep finding myself coming to the conclusion that I don't want to. _But,_ I've just had an epiphany! What if you take the diaries I have here… and you can compare them? It's a sure way to see if things have changed!"

Hermione perked up at this. "Actually, that's brilliant! How did I not think of it?"

Regulus, still crouched before her smirked crookedly up at her. She caught him, letting out a shaky chuckle, "What?"

He shook his head, "Nothing, you're just a brilliant witch, Hermione. You're so hard on yourself when you don't come up with ideas when you shouldn't be."

She nodded, "I know. I've always been that way. Unfortunately it's a trait of mine that I have tried and tried again to be rid of. Perfectionism." She felt her cheeks go rosy as Regulus was still smiling up at her.

"Everything will be all right, you know? I mean it… with or without Sirius's help. Narcissa and I will do whatever we can to help you fulfill your mission."

Hermione removed a hand from Regulus's and stroked his cheek softly with her thumb, unknowing of the feelings that were building up within him. She leaned forward and placed a kiss upon his forehead, whispering against his skin, "Thank you."

In response, Regulus closed his eyes and let out a deep sigh through his nose, forcing himself to not take her face into his hands and kiss her a thousand times over. He stood from his position, giving Hermione a smile and left the room. Taking a few deep breaths outside the door, he held a hand over his heart to calm himself down. He couldn't have her and it was tearing him apart. Next thing he knew, his feet were leading him down the stairs to find his sibling. He didn't really know why, or what he'd say, but he hoped that once they came face to face, it'd make sense. As he entered the foyer, Sirius was coming back inside the front door.

Sirius knew his brother was there before he even looked up. For the first time, they stood before each other without anyone else around; they stood there in silence for what felt like a lifetime. Both were gritting their teeth, their jawlines locked, and their nostrils flared. So much anger, sadness, remorse, and resentment had been pent up between them for so long. Everything in his mind went blank and next thing he knew, he punched Regulus across his face, _one_ , _two_ , _three_ times before Regulus came back with his own swings into Sirius's nose then across his brow, breaking skin. Then they pushed one another, and another few punches were thrown before they each backed against the walls, bent over and taking in ragged breaths.

Sirius rubbed his brow, his heart racing so that he could hear it in his ears. He couldn't control himself when the question left his lips. It was quiet, almost inaudible. But Regulus knew what Sirius had said; he had been expecting it. "Do you love her?"

"Would it change how you feel about her?" Regulus replied.

Sirius shook his head. The adrenaline pumped through him; it was making him sick to his stomach. "No, it wouldn't."

With every ounce of dignity he could muster, the younger Black answered with a firm, "No. I don't."

When Sirius sighed through his damaged nose, it almost sounded as if he were laughing. "That's a damn lie. You know it."

Regulus took a dangerous step forward, squinting his own blackened eye, "Then why ask? It wouldn't change a thing and _you_ know it. She's in love with you."

"Have you told her that you love her?" Sirius asked timidly.

Regulus could see the fear and the heartbreak written all over his brother. A part of him wanted to hurt him again for the way he'd treated Hermione upstairs… but the other part knew that it was a normal reaction. So many things happened all at once and, speaking from experience, it was a lot to take in.

Sirius was becoming impatient waiting Regulus's answer, "So?"

"What are you trying to gain from this, Sirius? Another fight? For you to threaten me and to tell me to stay away from her? Because no matter the threats, you can't keep me from her. I wouldn't. She's worth dying for — she's worth your threats." He took another step, "You want to tell me that she's your girl? Go ahead; like I said, it doesn't change a thing on any of our sides. I'm not your enemy, Sirius. No matter how much you hate me. I am not against you. But if a fight is what you want," he threw his arms out like wings, "then a fight is what you shall have. We can continue to go in circles. You know it's not going to fix things! It will only push her further away from you."

Sirius didn't say a thing. What was he supposed to say? To do? Regulus was making it very clear how it was going to be and who was he to argue with it? Regulus was right, it'd only push Hermione away; she was a grown ass woman. She was very capable of making her own decisions and if Sirius told Regulus to stay away, he was chancing losing her. All feelings aside, he couldn't do that. He had questions that needed answers. Marriage — would she leave once she defeated Voldemort? He needed her to himself, he needed to get everything out in the open,get her away from _them_ so they could discuss their relationship, where they stood…

He also needed to know how and why Regulus and Narcissa became a team… were they playing with the family? Had the whole family changed? What were their plans?

"You can ask me anything. I'll tell you the truth," Regulus said. He could see the wheels turning inside of Sirius's head.

"I am still trying to figure that out," Sirius answered.

Regulus nodded, finally taking a few steps back. "Take your time. I'll answer what I can when you're ready." He turned and headed back up the stairs, Sirius following slowly after him. Neither of them cleaning their skin of their bruises and blood.

Narcissa hadn't looked up when the men entered back into the room until she said, "Mother and Father will be— what the hell happened between you two?"

Hermione looked up from the floor, her brows furrowed in concern at their appearance. "What the hell?"

Regulus spoke before Sirius could answer, "Don't worry about it. What were you going to say, Cissa?"

"I was just going to say that my parents were likely going to be home soon… you were gone a lot longer than expected, so it'd probably be a smart idea for Sirius to leave now…"

Sirius turned to Hermione, his eyes sad. Dried blood covered his brow, "Are you staying or coming?"

"It depends on whether or not you want me in your home," she answered truthfully.

He sighed, "It's your home too, Hermione. Come back when you're ready… we have a lot to talk about. If you're ready, just knock on my door when you get there." He then spoke to his brother and cousin, "The three of us need to speak as well, but right now I am not ready to do so. I'll owl you. Or send word with Hermione."

The latter nodded. Without another word, the man left the estate.

"So many things happened today and we haven't gotten any answers. Just more questions," Hermione sighed shakily.

"Today has been a lot. We can get together again this week or whenever you're ready to try and work some of this out."

Hermione stood from the bed, "I've been thinking that I can look at your diaries when I get back to Sirius's place about the marriage. It's gotta be in there… unless it's not. But the future you wouldn't have given them to me without reason."

"Are you sure you want to go back there tonight? Give yourself and him some time to think… cool off. You're welcome here," Narcissa said.

The sun was down and night had officially fallen. Lord and Lady Black would be back any time now and she honestly didn't want to face them, not after the day she'd had. "You're right, but I think that I really should go back. I need to regain his trust."

Regulus nodded, "May I walk you?"

"Actually, I think I need to be alone… I'm sorry…," she said back.

A little disheartened by her answer, he agreed. "If you're sure."

"I am, thank you." She hugged him tightly; he didn't want to let her go.

Narcissa sadly smiled at the embrace, but dropped it when Hermione turned to her. "See you soon?"

"Yes," Narcissa nodded. "I'll walk you to the door."

….

The Elders of the Black Family sat around a large concrete table. It was adorned with three candles of different heights in the middle, glowing with bright blue flames. The air was chilly, though the fireplace had a brightly burning fire. No one said a word as they awaited the arrival of their master. Plates without food appeared before them, then wine glasses, filling themselves with purple liquid.

The stained glass door at the head of the room opened quietly as a well tailored man stepped in from the darkness behind him. His hair was slicked back, his eyes were slanted like a cat's; a hunter green glowed from them. His lips were set unevenly in a sneer and his cheekbones high.

Tom Riddle.

The members of the table stood in welcome and he smiled a perfect smile, his teeth glittering. "Welcome to my home." His voice was silky and low. "Shall we begin?"


	23. I Will Try To Fix You

" _I fell in love with you."_ His somber voice rung in her ears— the pain written over his features created a physical ache in her chest. What was she supposed to have said back to that? It was said so abruptly that she wasn't sure how to process it. The word felt so foreign, uncomfortable even. Sure, she loved him… she had known him for a long time. Though their age difference was apparent, she loved him dearly as a great friend. He was her best friend's Godfather and be that as it may, he was a very prominent person in her life. She was always with Harry and Harry was always with Sirius during the holidays. He was a good man and his death had affected her more than she was willing to admit. As she was in this timeline, she'd be a fool to say that the love she held for him didn't carry over. But to be _in love_ with him? Was she even capable of allowing herself to do so knowing that he could, and if she couldn't change the future, he _would_ , be torn away from her all over again. And that idea was one she just couldn't handle.

She allowed herself, unwillingly, to do the things that she had done with him in moments of pure weakness, and that was unfair, to both of them. She used him to hide her feelings, to forget about everything she had to do. Even though before they'd been intimate, she knew where she should have drawn the line, it was crystal clear that she couldn't cross it again. She couldn't do that to him - she couldn't make him feel things that she wasn't capable of reciprocating… and she couldn't do it to herself, especially since she hads to make her way back to 1998 when all was said and done. And if things went the way she intended, Sirius would be alive, enjoying his best life… married, having babies… and very much alive. _And I could just be the big-haired, smart friend of Harry's, unrecognized, existing in the periphery. A woman of his past that he had forgotten._

Her chest was painfully tight - she hadn't realized where her feet had guided her until she looked up into the window of a home that held two people who were very much newlyweds and very much in love. _That_ was the love Sirius deserved… Her brain twisted its thoughts back to the unanswered questions: _How did we manage to marry?_ Had he known, when he knew her? She watched as the woman through the window turned sideways, showing off a perfectly round baby bump. The husband placed a hand over the belly and leaned down, kissing his wife on the cheek, then said something lovingly, or funny, making the pregnant woman laugh.

Her breath caught in her throat when she looked up to open windows that held a freshly painted pink room. She blinked and a single tear fell over her nose. Her eyes came back to the dining room where the sweet couple sat together, now holding hands over the table, eating spaghetti and meatballs. Taking in a shaky breath, she turned away revealing the name upon the postage box: _Granger_

She walked for a while until she made it back to Sirius's place. She wasn't sure if she could even call it hers anymore. She knew she had to talk to him… to clear the air, to help him trust her. But really all she wanted to do was go upstairs, take off those blasted heels and push her nose into her pillow and scream. However, that would have to wait… she knew what she needed to do.

When Hermione left Narcissa's home, the time had just struck eight. The corner clock now rang a quarter after midnight. She dropped her gaze down to her feet: No wonder they were so numb. She had been walking for hours. Opening the door of the flat, her adrenaline began pumping through her. The smell of blood hit her nose. Bringing her wand to the ready, she spoke, "Sirius?" she called out, but no answer came. "Sirius?"

As quietly as her feet could carry her, she tiptoed to his bedroom. The door was slightly ajar but she furthered its opening by the tip of her wand pushing into it. _Red._ Her stomach flip-flopped and her knees gave out. The sight before her made her shake. She managed to crawl over to the bloody body lying on the floor. " _Remus_!" She didn't sound like herself; it was as if she were speaking beneath water. " _W-wake up!_ " she said, gathering his head into her arms, feeling his pulse (slow, but there), and staring at the gaping hole in his shoulder. She was pretty in tune with the moon cycles, but perhaps with everything she hadn't paid much mind to it. Her eyes shotran to the window to see it was only a half-moon. Trying to breathe, to steady herself, the smell of the blood made her even more queasy. "Okay, Remus… you need to stay with m-me…" She ripped his sleeve from the shoulder of his shirt, gathering it for a makeshift bandage. Her hands shook, they were beginning to stain red with his blood. The amount he had lost was dangerous… and where the hell was Sirius? Once the cloth was tied tightly around his shoulder, she said, "don't you d-die on me, Remus Lupin! I'll be right b-back!" Steadying herself to stand up, she nearly fell down. _Breathe._ She ran to the fireplace and went to the only place she could think of and stepped inside of James and Lily's living room.

Sirius looked up from the couch to see the woman coming through, covered in blood —blood that was very clearly not hers. He stood up, " _Wha_ —"

"Oh thank _God_ , you're here!" she breathed, then swallowed, "you have to come quickly… R-Remus!"

No further questions were asked, Sirius, followed by James and Lily came piling through after Hermione into the flat. The four of them ran into Sirius's room where Remus still laid on the floor unconscious.

Sirius and James dropped to the ground on either side of their friend, looking up to Hermione, their eyes full of concern and questions.

"We have to get him to the hospital!" she yelled.

"We can't!"James said, pulling at his hair stressfully.

"Wh- why not?" then the answer dawned on her when the two men exchanged glances.

Remus was a werewolf.

Her attention went back to Sirius, "I know you're incredibly pissed at me, but can I speak with you in the hall?"

Without a word, Sirius stood, Lily taking his place beside the man on the floor, beginning to work out whatever healing spells she could without the medical equipment that St. Mungo's offered.

Once in the hallway, Hermione turned around, facing the man, "I _know_."

He rubbed his hands down his face temperamentally, "Don't really have time to speak in riddles with you right now, Hermione."

Hermione rolled her eyes condescendingly, "I'm not speaking in riddles, Sirius. I mean, I know about Remus. His condition."

Sirius deadpanned, "How do you know that?"

"Story for another time, promise. But right now, we need to focus on saving him. St Mungo's has everything we need, _stop_ —I know that he can't go there, but they have what we need and Lily is really our only hope at the moment. Would she be willing to break the law?"

"Depends, I guess… What is it that you need?"

She sighed, "Wwhoever attacked Remus knows he's a werewolf. His lycanthropy is fighting his healing because of what he was hit with. Whoever hit him knew what they were doing. They weren't aiming to kill, Sirius. This was a _warning_."

Sirius felt his heart crawl into the tiny space in the back of his throat, he crossed his arms, "What do you mean?"

"The curse they used is called Silver Fire. It is deadly to werewolves, it will literally burn his insides—" she began to explain but Sirius stopped her, "Then why isn't he dead?"

"Would you please stop interrupting me so I can explain to you?"

He held up his hands, "sorry."

She blew out her cheeks, then ran her hair behind her ears, "As I was saying, they weren't aiming to kill. They didn't strike him in the heart. If they wanted him dead, he'd be dead right now. But we need to make the antidote, because this warning, it's just the beginning of something terribly gruesome."

Sirius nodded, "Okay, we can go explain this to Lily."

"Just ask her to get the things we need… we can explain it all later. If she cares about Remus, she will do whatever to keep her friend safe," Hermione said defensively.

"She _will_ be willing, Hermione,." Sirius countered.

"Good, because the longer we sit here, the longer it will take for him to heal."

"How do you know this potion will work?"

"Because, I was there when we used this on Remus where I am from in the Order. It was actually y—" _you that came up with the potion._ She was interrupted by Sirius's outburst at her sudden revelation.

Sirius's eyes widened, "Tthe Order?! You are a part of the Order?" _What was this girl not hiding?_

Hermione held up her hands, "Yes! I will explain later, Sirius! Our friend really needs this medicine! Please," she pointed to the door to go and ask Lily.

Almost an hour had passed before Lily had arrived with the ingredients from the list Hermione had written up. Hermione already had a cauldron heating. She mixed all the ingredients, Lily watching closely, of course, full of her own questions for how Hermione had come up with such a concoction and however did she know that it would help with cases such as Remus's?

Remus still hadn't woken at this point, which was lucky, because the pain Hermione had seen him in in 1998 because of this stupid curse had been excruciating. The woman distributed the potion into a syringe then handed it off to Sirius. "Just apply this to his shoulder, start inside the hole." she said. He nodded and began to fill the bloody mass with the liquid and watched in amazement as it began to heal.

Remus began to breathe rapidly; his pulse pounded in his neck. Sweat beaded across his lip and his browline. Then his eyes opened, large pupils slowly surrounded by golden hues. " _Pad_... Sirius…" he spoke, his voice dry.

" _Shh…"_ Lily cooed, pushing his wet hair aside. "We are all here, Remus… You're okay now."

The man nodded the best he could, his eyes widening once they landed on Hermione, "Hey, y-you."

Her heart swelled, "Hello, Remus."

"Stay with me, Mi," he said quietly. Of course, she'd stay with him. She'd do whatever she could to help him feel better.

All eyes fell on her now, though. She felt her cheeks warming and the thoughts were abundantly clear that they were thinking there was something more going on between the two. She saw jealousy in Sirius's eyes… questions in James… and she couldn't place what was in Lily's, but it wasn't friendly.

She did her best to ignore everyone and turned her attention back to Remus, "Do you think you can stand so we can go to my room?"

He nodded weakly but Sirius spoke up, "No, don't move. You can stay in here."

Remus shook his head, "No, I want to go to her room."

Sirius wasn't sure how to react to this… Remus knew how Sirus felt about Hermione, so what the hell was he playing at?

Once out of the room, Lily turned to Sirius, "what the hell was that? What is all of this about? How the hell did Hermione know about an antidote to something even I have never seen before? And what did she say to you in the hall earlier?"

"Lily, calm the fuck down!"James raised his voice.

She crossed her arms and faced him angrily.

It definitely didn't go unnoticed by Sirius, the anger that boiled between the couple. "Are the two of you okay?" he asked.

Lily dodged her eyes from Sirius, but James gave a quick nod.

 _Okay… obviously not,._ Sirius thought. "Right well, I need to clean this mess." he pointed to the bloody stain on his carpet. "I'll update you tomorrow."

James moved over to where Sirius stood, "Do you want some help?"

Sirius shook his head, "No… I got it. Thanks, though."

James squeezed his friend's shoulder. "Don't think too much about Remus and Hermione… I am sure it's nothing."

Sirius felt his heart tumble down to the deep depths of his stomach, "Yeah."

Finally finished with the cleanup, Sirius sat on his bed staring down at the fresh carpet. He began to think about the order of the events that happened within the last twelve hours and he never imagined that he'd be where he was now. After everything between his brother, cousin, and Hermione… Sirius had found himself with a bottle of whisky, whining on James's couch. Of course, he didn't go into complete detail of everything… but, _shit_ , had he wanted to. He needed advice, but for some awful reason, he just couldn't trust that information with them… and that really did something terrible to his mind. The thought of betraying Hermione's trust like that did him in, as well. _Fuck._ But he'd sat there on their couch, drinking in the bronze liquid and not saying much. They didn't ask about the cut above his brow and he didn't ask why the hell there was such tension between them. The three of them sat in silence up until Hermione came tumbling through the Floo with blood on her hands.

 _Ugh, Hermione._ He _was_ thankful that she was there to help save Remus but why'd she have to go run off with him into her room? " _Puhh_." He blew out his lips. More and more continued to unravel around that _damn_ _woman_ , from the fact that she was from the future, her being his wife, she was a part of the Order of the Phoenix, and knows that Remus is a werewolf. And to top it all off, she was best friends with two of his enemies… _What the actual fu-_

A knock on his door stole his attention. He almost didn't answer, but decided against it. "Come in…"

The woman opened the door, then quietly closed it behind her. She placed her hands into the pockets of her sleeping pants. "He finally fell asleep," she said, voice just above a whisper.

"And what did you have in your room that you couldn't give him in here?" Sirius asked.

Hermione shrugged, "I couldn't tell you. He barely spoke proper sentences… but he kept saying thank you. Perhaps he just didn't want to look weak in front of you," she guessed.

"Rubbish. I have seen that man in some of his most vulnerable states, Hermione."

Hermione shrugged again, "I don't know what to tell ya." In reality, she knew exactly why Remus had asked for her. He did indeed want to say thank you… He also told her that he knew about Regulus and had questions… He also told her that he was attacked by someone that was close to him, but _who_ he was unsure of. His senses had been wiped out as soon as the silver penetrated his skin.

When Sirius didn't say anything to that she turned on her foot, "Well, I'll take the couch, so Remus can get the rest he needs."

Sirius shook his head. No matter how angry he was at the woman before him, he was still a gentleman. "Don't be silly, you can sleep in here. I'll take the couch."

Hermione looked down at her feet, "Honestly, it's okay. I am a big girl."

Without really thinking about the words that left his mouth, he asked. Curiosity won. "Is there something going on between you and Remus? Here — _there?"_

Hermione began coughing at the hard inhalation of air she just took. "No! No, no, no, no. Absolutely not! No way!" The woman shook her head.

Sirius merged his brows together, "I didn't realize you thought so _low_ of him…." He'd never admit to the sudden relief.

Hermione gave him a stunned look. "I would never ever think low of Remus. I love him very much. He's a wonderful friend to me. I'd be a very lucky woman to be his person… Age aside, he and I never clicked in that way. Not here and not there. He was my mentor and my friend, Sirius."

The man showed a smile for the first time, "Okay."

Silence engulfed their surroundings, Hermione wasn't sure if she should sit, stand, or leave. Sirius, however, stood from his bed and walked over to the balcony. When he realized the woman hadn't followed him, he asked, "You comin'?"

They sat down at the table outside. Sirius lit up a cigarette. Neither said anything, both trying to focus on something, but failed.

Hermione pulled her knees against her chest and let out a shaky breath as she rested her chin on her knees. She jumped when Sirius spoke.

"So…" then he chuckled at her startle. "Sorry, I didn't mean to frighten you."

Rubbing her eyes, "It's all right. What were you saying?" She was incredibly tired.

The tip of his cigarette burned red as he inhaled, "You're from the future, Hermione Granger."

"I am…" she licked her bottom lip nervously. Where was he going with this?

"And you know me…" he said.

"I do," she answered quietly, hoping that he didn't ask her to elaborate too much. She knew if he knew the truth about his death, he'd probably freak out, or he could surprise her and find that he would accept it… but that was not a chance she was willing to take at the moment while things were… _calm_? She almost laughed. When were things ever calm?

"Are Remus and I still friends?"

Hermione jolted her head back at the question _._ "Of course. The best of." She didn't dare tell him that Remus thought Sirius had been behind the murders of his best friends and the lives of twelve other people…

"How about… er… James and Lily? I know they are going through stuff right now…"

 _Oh boy…_ How was she to change the subject? She knew _that_ broken man… she couldn't handle seeing him like that again. "You have a wildly large heart, you know that? You ask about everyone else but not yourself, why?"

Sirius shrugged as he lit up another cigarette, "Don't know, guess I am not all that interested in my life? I go with the flow… always have. Hope to always will. I imagine my life will be just as i envision it. Working at the Auror's office, possibly working in Moody's position or pissing someone else off…" he snorted, " Married… a kid or two," he noticed the way Hermione tensed. "Are we… _married_ in your time?"

"Um… no. That was all news to me as well. When you came barging into Narcissa's bedroom, that is when I found out. Like I said before, I know you… but you're twenty years older than I am." She felt guilty for not telling him that he was actually dead, but he made it clear that he didn't want to know.

"What, not into older men, I take it?" he teased and she rolled her eyes as he continued, "we must've gotten married in this timeline, but not this one… but this one, but before you go back. Or if you go back." Hermione's heart pounded at that thought. _If._ "You must've come back before now."

"I came to that conclusion as well, but I don't know. I have read book after book and nothing has given me any indication on how it works given the position I am in. Also, if I had come back before, why send me back again? Have you and I had this discussion before? Did I not pass the test? Does anything change? I am full of the same questions." She looked over at him; he was staring up at the sky. "There are things that you did then that indicate that you knew me before... "

Sirius perked up, "Yeah? Like what?"

"Just certain things that you do or say…" _Like calling me Ace._

"Am I a pervy old man?" he wiggled his brows suggestively.

Hermione let out a flutter of light laughter. _Well, after being in lock up for as long as you had, I don't blame you, I guess._ "No… I wouldn't say that. I am probably overreacting, I was younger."

His eyes had a strange flicker, had she said too much? "You are full of so many secrets and everything before now, I feel was a lie. I want to know you, Hermione, I want to know the real you. I want there to be trust between us. And right now, I don't think I can give you my trust. I need time...but I am willing to work this out, if you are."

Hermione nodded, "I understand, Sirius. I am willing to know you… I am willing to help you learn whatever you want to know. But I need you to know this, not everything was a lie… I have been me this entire time… the way I treat you, the way I act, it's not a show. The stories might have different timelines, but it's all real."

His heart pounded with anxiety, "I am sorry for telling you that I love you. I don't want you to feel threatened by that or feel like you need to pull away because of it. I, " he blew out his cheeks as he scratched his chin, stubble was growing out. "I find myself wondering if it's you that I am in love with, or the idea of you."

 _Ouch._ That stung a little more than she felt it should. It was obvious that it was apparent on her face.

He shrugged, "I'm sorry, it's a lot to think about."

"I don't blame you. I guess I should have been expecting it," she said solemnly.

Silence lingered between them until Hermione stood, "I'm going to bed."

"Okay, let me finish this cigarette—" Sirius began.

"No, Sirius, it's okay. I am going to take the couch."

"Why? I told you you could take the bed—"

Hermione held out a hand and gave him a small smile, "Really, it's fine. I don't want to put you out more than I already have." Barefoot, she padded through the bedroom and to the living room. She gathered the blanket from the back of the couch and wrapped it around her body as she fell into the sofa, sleep took her almost immediately.

Sirius didn't like this —not being in control. Not knowing the full story. He honestly would have felt more understanding toward Hermione if she wasn't best friends with Regulus and Narcissa —he could not wrap his head around that one whatsoever. These were all questions he just couldn't force himself to ask, as when he was around Hermione, his mind went blank. He wasn't sure if it was because he was afraid to know. But he knew that Hermione was deliberately keeping something from him.

He left his room, taking a peek into Hermione's to check on his friend who was snoring quietly, cuddled up to one of the pillows. His heart felt overwhelmed after the earlier events, and no matter the circumstances between himself and Hermione, he was full of gratitude for the woman because she saved Remus's life. He owed her a debt, though it wasn't his life, it was as good as, because without Remus… or James, he felt his life wasn't worth living.

Almost heading back to his room, he decided he needed to tell Hermione thank you first. Surely she was still awake. When he walked into the room, he found the woman sleeping soundly with the blanket wrapped up around her chin and her hair spread across the couch pillow.

His stomach dropped and his feet carried him over to her. He climbed onto the couch behind her and instinctively her body gravitated toward his, her back pressed against his chest. He wrapped his arm around her waist and inhaled her flowery scent. _Gods,_ she was beautiful. He needed this moment with the woman, no words, but just his thoughts and his heart making all the decisions. " _You're going to be the death of me,"_ he whispered against her earlobe. " _And for the first time, I've never been so afraid."_ She let out a soft sigh as she nuzzled her head deeper into the cushion. Sirius held onto her just a little bit tighter, " _Because I don't want to live without you, baby."_


	24. Hiatus

Hello Readers,

Queen of Yesterday will be placed on a Hiatus.

I am currently going through a divorce and I've got to get my mindset where it needs to be before

i get back into writing on this story.

I truly hope hope you all understand! And I will write again (hopefully) soon.

Lots of love,

Blue


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